2E Child (Twice Exceptional - Autistic / Profoundly Gifted) - 2e children

The Last Article

noreply@blogger.com (Shiroi Tora) — Sun, 16 Apr 2023 23:55:00 +0000

Song: Che Vuole Questa Musica Stasera

Artist: Peppino Gagliardi

It has been 12 years since I started this blog.

This will be the last public article for this blog...

and I will keep it up for approximately one month.

I will be making it by invitation only from now on.

Alex will soon be attending graduate school...

and as part of having his own classes to attend...

and his own research to conduct...

he will also be teaching math to undergraduates at the university.

As such...

he wishes for his life to be more private...

and I fully understand this.

Alex doesn't mind having the present readers of his blog

to continue having access to it...

and so...

should anyone wish to continue reading of Alex's life

as he continues taking on challenges...

just send me a quick add me email to:

shiroitora2echild@gmail.com

I will then send you a request of approval to add after the month is up.

Alex simply doesn't want his future students to have complete access

to his past.

And so...

within a month or so...

I will be making this blog by invitation only.

So...

once again...

if you wish to keep seeing new articles...

or even rereading older articles...

just send your email to me for an add to the blog's access.

(It will only be used for this one purpose

and will not be shared with anyone else for any purpose.)

Remember...

once you have sent me your email...

Not on the blog itself...but through my email only:

shiroitora2echild@gmail.com

it will take about one month before you will get an approval to add

email from me.

There will be instructions as to how to access the blog once I have made it private.

Should you run into any problems accessing the blog...

feel free to contact me through my email.

To all those of whom have been enjoying seeing Alex grow

into the fine young man he is today...

I thank you.

------------------------------------

Addendum (May 5th):

Just yesterday (May 4th)...

the official ceremony for Phi Beta Kappa took place.

These are just some of the photos from that event

as had been taken by his mother.

Alex is on the far left.

Alex's Last Time Helping To Run The UC Berkeley Math Tournament

noreply@blogger.com (Shiroi Tora) — Sun, 16 Apr 2023 10:56:00 +0000

Song (cover): Fantasy

Group: Leonid and Friends

Alex just got back from the 2023 UC Berkeley Math Tournament a few hours ago.

Besides helping to write the problems used in the competition...

he was one of the graders during the competition.

Alex will soon be concentrating on his graduate school studies...

research, and teaching duties.

Alex said he had a lot of fun at the competition.

Here are but a few of the pictures from the awards ceremony

after the competition:

And so closes the last chapter of Alex's adventure at UC Berkeley...

and of this blog for the public.

In the last and final article...

I will describe how to keep open the access to his blog for those of whom wish to

follow Alex's development as he makes his way in life.

Alex Helping To Run The 2023 Stanford University Math Tournament

noreply@blogger.com (Shiroi Tora) — Mon, 10 Apr 2023 23:55:00 +0000

Song: Sentimental Lady

Artist: Bob Welch

This past Saturday...

Alex and other members of the UC Berkeley Math Tournament committee

went to Stanford University to help run their

Stanford University Math Tournament.

As Alex already graduated from UC Berkeley...

this will be the last time Alex will be helping to run the math tournament

at Stanford University.

And, after later this week when Alex will help run the

UC Berkeley Math Tournament...

it will be the last time Alex will be helping run the tournament at UC Berkeley.

After Alex and the other members of the UC Berkeley Math Tournament committee

finished grading the competition at Stanford University...

they went back to UC Berkeley to finish up planning for their upcoming math tournament.

Alex didn't get home until after 1 AM...

and he slept until after noon the next day.

Alex had a wonderful time grading the competitor's papers.

Anything having to do with math...

Alex just loves doing it.

As Alex and the other graders of the competition

were furiously working away grading the competitor's papers...

they didn't get to see the tournament itself...

and so, Alex couldn't take many pictures.

Alex and the other team members of the

UC Berkeley Math Tournament committee

will be busy the rest of this week in preparation

for the 2023 UC Berkeley Math Tournament...

and as it will be Alex's last time helping to run the tournament there...

I am sure the competition will be a bittersweet day.

Alex has many fond memories of competing at the UC Berkeley Math Tournament

starting from the 8th grade...

and later...of helping to run the tournament...

and of helping to design the problems used in the tournament.

From the first time Alex competed there...

Alex had made up his mind that UC Berkeley would be

his university of choice once he could apply.

It had been a wonderful time for Alex there.

The next article will be of Alex helping to run...for the last time...

the UC Berkeley Math Tournament.

Alex will be choosing his graduate school soon...

and once he does...

he and his mother must prepare to move near the next campus.

Although Alex and his mother has thoroughly enjoyed

living at the ocean side condo all these years...

they are also excited at the prospect of exploring

the areas near their new home as Alex attends his graduate school.

A Movie And Supper In San Francisco

noreply@blogger.com (Shiroi Tora) — Thu, 06 Apr 2023 14:58:00 +0000

Song: Rock On

Artist: David Essex

Yesterday...

Alex and his mother took another short trip to San Francisco.

Alex wanted to see the Mario Brothers movie...

and to then eat out.

Even though Alex is very serious in all of his studies...

he has not allowed his inner child to perish.

This is good...

as it is only through the eyes of a child that one may

see the world as a place filled with hope and wonderment...

a place of great adventure to explore and deeply appreciate.

Alex is preparing himself for another step towards his future.

He must soon choose among the universities which offered him

a position as a grad student.

He is also going back to Stanford University soon to help run their

math competition.

Everything in Alex's future looks bright...

and he loves the direction in which his life is heading.

I am so happy for him.

In the next article...

I will write about his day at Stanford University.

III - Alex's Trip To Japan - 2023

noreply@blogger.com (Shiroi Tora) — Mon, 06 Feb 2023 06:32:00 +0000

Song: Sukiyaki (Ue O Muite Arukou)

Artist: Kyu Sakamoto

(I remember hearing this song from the first time I lived in Japan...

as a child growing up there (1963 - 1966). It was playing everywhere.)

After visiting Osaka...

Alex and his mother spent one day in Kyoto.

It was bitterly cold in Kyoto...

so much so that Alex needed to buy some gloves.

Did those ladies wear thermals underneath their kimonos?

They must have been cold. :)

After seeing some temples in Kyoto...

it was time to begin the last leg of their Japan trip....

on to Tokyo.

They took a short boat tour in Tokyo.

They had an area which was dedicated to New York...

and they had replicated some smaller versions of it.

Alex enjoying his last meal in Japan before their flight back home.

Alex and his mother greatly enjoyed their trip to Japan.

I am so glad Alex enjoyed himself...

he had earned every minute of his trip.

They had one regret...

they wish they had set aside more time to have more thoroughly seen Kyoto...

as well as having spent some time seeing the Rokko mountains...

and of Kobe itself.

These areas were some of my favorites when I lived in Osaka.

But...

Alex has plenty of time in his future to revisit Japan.

In the meantime...

he may dream of his future adventures to be had...

as this alone will provide the fuel for his drive to achieve his dreams.

II - Alex's Trip To Japan - 2023

noreply@blogger.com (Shiroi Tora) — Sun, 05 Feb 2023 04:21:00 +0000

Album: Enchanted Forest

(Melodies of Japan)

Artist: James Galway

After having spent the first two weeks at my wife's mother's house in Shikoku...

Alex and his mother then boarded a small commuter plane to Osaka

to enjoy a few days there.

They went to Universal Studios in Osaka.

They then spent some time at Super Nintendo World.

They had mockups of some famous places in the US...

including San Francisco.

The next day...

they went to the Osaka Castle area.

Umeda, in Osaka, is where I had first met my wife...over 37 years ago.

(Although we wouldn't wed until almost a decade later).

We both worked at the same company...

(I started there after I had graduated university)

of which was within an easy walk from Osaka Castle

(Although I had been sent to many different branches in Osaka for part of the week...

and even to some distant locations in Japan...

my main branch was in Umeda, Osaka.)

I used to love to look at Osaka Castle all lit up at night...

and as reflected off the waters of the Yodo River

(On most days...I wouldn't get off work until after 9 PM).

Osaka Castle is especially beautiful at night...

as it is well lit...

and to see it shimmering as it is reflected off the water

from the far side of the Yodo river is a sight to behold.

Alex and his mother had also visited Shinsaibashi in Osaka.

It is a very well known area which is famous for its neon beauty at night.

Not only are the shops lit up...

but the canals which run through the area also have lit and multi colored fountains at night.

This area was where many a movie was shot...

including some of the Micheal Douglas and Andy Garcia movie...

Black Rain.

It has been many decades since I had last been to Shinsaibashi...

but I remember my time there well.

In fact...

I had included many of the areas I had visited in Japan

in my second book of the Kuma Trilogy (My first Trilogy).

A big part of Alex's enjoyment of Japan came in the way of the food.

Alex absolutely loves Japanese food...

as do his mother and I.

On the next day

(and so...the next article)...

my wife and son visited Kyoto.

I - Alex's Trip To Japan - 2023

noreply@blogger.com (Shiroi Tora) — Sat, 04 Feb 2023 06:42:00 +0000

Song: Until We Meet Again

Composer / Performing Artist (Guitar / Bass Flute): James Toller

(I picked my own song for this article as Alex had shown this song

to his grandmother on his laptop and she greatly enjoyed listening to it.)

My wife and Alex spent a total of three weeks in Japan.

They spent the first two weeks visiting my wife's hometown in Shikoku.

They had spent the first free day in Kochi as they had arrived too late to continue

their journey to my wife's hometown village by train...

so they stayed the night in Kochi and then spent most of the next day there.

They then arrived at her parent's house later that night.

Their trip was bittersweet as her father is ill...

and her mother was sad...

however, she was cheered up by my wife's and Alex's visit.

Alex loves Japanese food...

and so...

for the duration of their trip...

Alex got to eat his fill.

My wife's village is a good country mile down small country roads...

and nestled at the foot of some mountains.

My wife and Alex regularly walked into town to grocery shop or to eat out.

Alex at his Japanese grandmother's house...

enjoying a snack.

This graveyard is a short walk from my wife's village below.

A river separates her village from the greater town in the background.

A mountain path a short walk from his grandmother's house.

Alex resting at his grandmother's house.

His grandmother's village.

Her house is not visible in this photo.

It is to the left and right up against the mountains.

Alex and his mother walking the bank of the river which separates

his grandmother's village and the town.

The bridge in the background is what they must cross to buy groceries or to eat out.

Alex walking up into the mountains just a little ways from his grandmother's house.

A light meal for Alex at his grandmother's house.

Crossing the bridge into town.

Alex tried Pachinko in town.

The last night of their two week stay in my wife's hometown.

The last week of their stay in Japan will be split among Kyoto, Osaka, and Tokyo.

Alex and his mother at a small airport...

and on their way to Osaka.

IV - The Mindset Of A Parent - Application

noreply@blogger.com (Shiroi Tora) — Mon, 23 Jan 2023 14:06:00 +0000

Song: Moon Star

Original Artist: Kitaro

Rendition: Royal Symphonic Orchestra

One thing you must remember...

Love, and its derivative...Passion...

are the only two emotions in life that give more energy than they take.

True love...

whether it be romantic...

or paternal or maternal...

is when you put the other's welfare and happiness before your own.

When you derive great happiness by seeing great happiness in your loved ones...

that is when you know your love is true...

and it will manifest itself through your actions.

If it seems to be a sacrifice on your part...

if there is dread associated with your projections of the future...

know you are not ready to become a parent or life partner.

It is not a matter of, or a test of, strength.

If you lose more energy than you receive...

you will eventually become worn down.

Whenever I was apart from my family at work...

just by thinking of them and of our future...

I would feel a deep happiness within which energized me.

And so...

before any application of philosophy or psychology to parenting...

you must know yourself well enough to know if you are ready to become a parent.

I hadn't become a parent until just three weeks shy of my 41st birthday.

To have a child in my wife's and my life

was fully looked forward to and planned for before conception.

It was only after my wife and I knew that we were ready to become parents...

did we become one.

It was only when we had already done our traveling and had our own adventures in life

that we were fully ready to start our family.

For my wife and I...

our son, Alex...

is a wonderful dream having come to fruition.

I have never had any regrets in my becoming a father...

and certainly none in being a father...

and so, even though I love life...

I can die without regrets because of my great love for my son, Alex.

Life became magical from the moment our son, Alex, was born.

Being a parent, for my wife and I...

was never a sacrifice or a grind.

It was the start of a grand adventure...

and one which continues to become better and better as time goes by.

Just know that unless you have an inner desire

to spend all of your time with your family...

to have a drive from within to guide your child in life...

know that you still have unaccomplished goals in life which you must

resolve before having a child.

If wanting a child comes from deep within...

if the prospect of nurturing and guiding a child in life

sweetly wrings your heart as nothing else has ever had in life...

then you are ready...

assuming you may solidly provide for your family financially...

of course.

And so...

this...

the last of my articles on the Mindset of a Parent

will go into the application of the aforementioned concepts

of the previous articles, of which had provided the reasons and rationals

to the following methods of achieving the goal of having your child

achieve his or her dreams...

and so...

living his or her life to the fullest.

The greatest love and bonding that occurs in we humans...

is between mother and child.

And although there is a great love of a father for his children...

there is a biological bond that a mother has that cannot be experienced by a father.

A father understands this...

and even revels in this knowledge.

This assures him that his progeny will be well looked after.

------------------

BONDING

As we are emotional creatures...

and as this provides us with great motivation to achieve...

bonding is the first step of application.

And so...

time spent with the child cannot be substituted with anything else.

A deep and sacred bond such as which occurs between mother and child

provides the basis for all further interactions within the family.

It is vital to the mother and to the child...

and so, to the family unit...

and even to society as a whole.

With the deep attachment that forms between mother and child...

love drives all further actions.

It gives the mother the great endurance and patience

which is so necessary for the first few years of a child's life.

The mother will face sleep deprivation

and the need for the constant caring of her helpless child.

It is the deep love she had developed during the bonding process

which will drive all of her subsequent actions...

and which will allow her to do for her child with great care and love.

Methods of Application

Breastfeed.

This is not only the best food health wise for the child...

oxytocin...

the love hormone...

inundates the mother's brain during nursing...

and greatly stimulates a deeper connection between her and her child.

This is another biological connection that a father cannot know.

Skinship

Holding your child to your chest furthers the bonding process.

This goes for fathers as well as for mothers.

I loved holding my son and gently rocking him.

To see him being comforted as he drifted off to sleep in my arms

was so precious to me.

My wife was always holding, rocking, and nurturing our son.

She took great joy in holding him near...

as did I.

I must adamantly stress this...

A CHILD IS NOT SPOILED BY THE OPEN DEMONSTRATION

OF LOVE AND AFFECTION.

A child only becomes spoiled if the parameters

of good behavior are not adhered to.

If a child cries...

it is because of some unmet need.

You will not spoil a child by meeting those needs.

It is his only method of communication.

Never fear picking up your child...

and after ruling out discomfort due to his immediate environment...

needing a diaper change...

or hunger...

hold him to you and rock him with the knowledge

that he wanted to feel you near.

He is crying out for skinship...

to know that the person with whom he loves the most...

also loves and cares for him.

It is to let him know that you will protect him

and provide him the cozy warmth he so desires.

We had a bassinet which opened on one side so it could be

next to our bed so our son could always be near his mother.

He could reach out and touch her...and vice a versa.

We never put him in a crib to cry alone.

As he grew...

he would only sleep in one...

but with his mother right nearby.

When he cried...

his mother would pick him up and start their day together.

We held him often...

and played with him...

and from birth...

my wife would hold him near to her as she read to him.

Each night was bedtime reading for him.

My wife made it fun for him...

and so...

he always looked forwards to bedtime.

She would put her finger on each word as she read aloud...

and soon, he would put his finger on her's as she read...

and so, in this manner...

he learned to read many years ahead of his time

(He was spelling out words, and even whole sentences,

with his blocks and with a portable speller at two years old.)

My wife interspersed their nightly reading with hugs, kisses, and laughter

to ensure he always loved this time together.

And so...

this leads into the next application.

POSITIVE REINFORCEMENT

Through the stimulation of the Pursuit of Pleasure principle...

you get more of the desired behavior.

A child naturally wishes to please.

By showing your inner joy to him when he accomplishes something...

he will strive to repeat those actions which had given his parents joy...

and so, what made him feel good.

This is not to say that one should ever withhold love and affection

without him having completed some sort of objective...

but it is to say that picking him up and expressing extra affection and joy

will increase his behavior leading up to your expressed happiness.

A child is constantly exploring his environment.

For him...it is simple cause and effect.

He simply does what makes him feel good...

and he is repulsed by anything which leads to him feeling uncomfortable.

One important point...

as your child grows...

be sure to only reward true accomplishments.

To reward mediocrity is to ensure he will only strive for mediocrity...

as this will be the quick and easy path for him to falsely feel good.

Again, you should still give him a life filled with unfettered love and affection...

however, you just don't express phony extra praise for mediocre actions

just to embolden his self image.

This will only lead him to self glorification...

a false sense of unearned pride which will lead to

a sense of entitlement and laziness.

He will then be out of synch with reality...

and so, the rest of the world.

Your goal is to also prepare him for life.

The world doesn't care about anything but positive results...

nor should it.

Instead...

guide him to true accomplishment and then heavily praise that.

This will lead him on the correct path in life...

instead of on the path of comfort in mediocrity.

Ex.: Say your child haphazardly stacks some blocks together...

some all askew with larger blocks atop smaller ones...

and with the tower leaning...

and he then looks at you awaiting his praise.

Simply help him build a correct one.

Demonstrate with him...

how to build one which is stable...

with the larger blocks on the bottom...

and with symmetry.

Guide his hands to completion and then give him a plentiful amount of praise.

He will then be truly pleased.

It is not a simple matter of teaching him how to build blocks correctly.

It is to demonstrate to him that you are his guide...

his teacher...

and it will build a trust in you to guide him.

And in doing so...

it also teaches him that there are better ways of doing things...

and that you are not deserting him to learn by error only.

Always remember...

it is not society...

not school...

not his peers or TV which will teach him morals...

or to in any way raise him.

It is you...

the parent...

who must raise him.

It is you who will guide him onto the correct paths in life...

and in order to do this...

you simply must be there with him...

actively guiding him.

How to do this?

GUIDED DAILY STUDY HABITS

Anything done in the optimum amounts of quantity and quality

cannot help but improve.

But that is the catch...isn't it?

How do you determine the optimum amounts?

By the results.

Supercompensation occurs in the realm of the intellectual...

just as surely as it does in the realm of the physical.

The body or mind grows stronger or more well adapted to any applied stress...

so long it is within the window of adaptation.

A child's intellectual stamina grows...

as surely as does a runner's body under training...

so long as it is not over trained to the point that it cannot adapt...

or so under trained as to have no adaptation occur in the first place.

You must monitor your child's frustration level.

If he gets frustrated...

give more frequent breaks.

Take it in smaller increments.

Guide him in his studies...this will limit any felt frustration.

Give him examples of similar problems and how to solve them.

Give him the underlying concept.

Then have him apply it to his present problem.

Give him praise and a kiss on his forehead once completed.

He will then love to learn.

It is simply akin to eating.

Too big of a bite...and he will choke.

Simply cut the meat into smaller pieces.

He will then ingest the smaller piece and he will be ready to chew again.

It is in this way that the meal will be enjoyed and finished with great gusto.

The praise and his earning of his reward is the desert.

And in accordance with this simile...

studying must come first...

and then...

and only then...

should he be allowed his desert...

whatever that may be

(Video games or such).

Now...

you may allow him short and frequent breaks in his studies...

but only after having successfully completed certain objectives.

But...

with your guidance in his studies...

he will enjoy studying so much he will wish to finish his studies early.

He will end up wanting to limit the breaks

so he may fully enjoy more free time at the end

(As did Alex. He wanted to complete all of his studies first.

This is the essence of Deferred Gratification...

one of the keys to having a wonderful life.)

In holding to this pattern...

he will have earned his reward...

and so...

he will have something for which to look forwards each day.

This will set the stage for a good work ethic...

one which will serve him well in life.

By studying everyday...

he will remember the previous lessons...

and so...

he will continue to progress.

But...

just as importantly...

it will become an accepted habit.

And with your steady guidance...

it will keep frustration at bay.

As he will be way ahead of the curve at school...

he will continue to hunger to advance himself...

he will look forwards to school...

and so...learning.

Be sure to give your child possible goals in life for which to strive.

Stimulate his interest in that possibility...

or any other viable career of his heart's desire...

and support his interest.

Ex.: A pilot.

Take him to see air shows...

and show him movies which depict positive examples of pilots

(The Navy and Air Force had a great number of applicants

for pilots not too long after the original Top Gun movie).

Reverse plan back to him.

It will show the necessary objectives to accomplish in order to achieve his goal.

Inherently provided are the timelines and waypoints along the way.

This schematic gives him a sense of future along with achievable objectives.

He will strive to master any and all subjects related to furthering his dream.

The formula is simple:

Dream

(Subjective)

Plan

(Objective)

Walk the path until fruition

(Strength of passion plus efficiency of plan equals eventual positive result)

Just remember...

the key to the psyche lies in the built in reward system of the brain.

Stimulate that...

while simultaneously limiting pain...

you will get more of those actions which give him his reward.

Once this is accomplished...

he will have become self motivated...

and he will then have put himself on an upwards trajectory in life.

And so...

the ultimate goal of the parent...

as well as that of the child...

the achievement of your child's dreams...

will then have become a foregone conclusion.

Yes...

Life is that simple...

if you have him but steadily walk on the path of a Positive Spiral.

Part III - The Mindset Of A Parent: A Fundamental Psychological Look

noreply@blogger.com (Shiroi Tora) — Sat, 21 Jan 2023 06:39:00 +0000

Song: Zeynep's Romance

Artist: Omar Faruk Tekbilek

In this article...

I will be putting forth my thoughts from which had formed the structure

underlying my wife's and my methods for raising our son, Alex.

It is based upon basic psychological premises

of which form the reasons and rationales governing human behavior...

from the simplest...

to the more situationally adapted.

To better understand yourself...

is to better understand others.

My goal here is to give you the very basics of human behavior...

of ways to see things so we may change ourselves...

and so...

our children...

for the better.

So much is basic common sense...

but, as much of it is derived from experience...

for those of whom are without experience in life...

it is not yet common.

The very first thing you must realize...

one of the most fundamental operations of all beings...

the most fundamental of all drives that motivate us all:

The pursuit of pleasure

The aversion to pain

By stimulating the pursuit of pleasure and limiting any associated pain...

you get more of that particular activity.

By directly associating positive behavior with the pursuit of pleasure...

you will get more of that behavior until it becomes habit.

When it is done on a daily basis from young enough...

it becomes a life long drive.

This is the goal of any parent...

to have our children internalize the positive behavior so they become self driven.

Their reward comes from within even when you are not there...

and this is when they enter a positive spiral in life

(I had discussed this concept in a link in the previous article.

If you have not read all of the articles of the previously provided links...

please do so, as they are necessary to understand further concepts).

And, just as with philosophy...

you need not know the history or the proponents

of the various branches of psychology.

Just by knowing the fundamentals of what drives us as human beings...

and how we may use this knowledge to give to our children

the means of achieving their dreams...

we will know some of the greatest happiness a parent can experience.

In the below links...

I give what my wife and I had used...

and had later explained to our son, Alex...

the concepts and principles and the means and methods...

to put him on a positive spiral in life.

In most of my articles...

I am presenting a rational argument for thinking and feeling a certain way...

for realizing certain paths to take...

and so...

to realize greater rewards in life for you and your child.

Positive reinforcement - Positive Spiral

The Importance of Optimism

Deferred Gratification

Concept of Sharing

Concept of Patience

Concept of Happiness

Concentration on Strengths

Passion - A Deep Seated Strength

Perseverance - The Keystone To Success

Solitude - The Initial Path of the Intellectual Warrior

Fault and the Art of the Apology

The Importance of Posture

Perfection - A Worthy Goal

Dealing With Grief

Concept of Mortality

Concept of Aspiration

The Battle of Wills - A Battle For your Child's Future

Concept of Forgiveness

Concept of Change

To Dream - The Strengthening of Your Child's Spirit

Concept of Love

Concept of Commitment

Concept of Self Mastery

Concept of Sorrow

Concept of a Meritocracy

Concept of a Concept

Increasing Empathy

Conquering Fears

Drive - The Most Important Attribute

When Thinking Us and Them is Wrong

Concept of Parental Leadership

In Touch with Nature - In Touch with the Soul

The Soul Deadening Poison of Pessimism

Reflection of Life - A Schematic for the Future

Memorable Events in Life

Guarding and Leading our Children

Concept of Hope

Concept of Mission

Modified Tit for Tat - A Winning Method of Dealing With Aggression

Peace of Mind - The Art of Paying Your Dues

Uniqueness - Neither Inherently Good nor Bad

When Subjectivity is Invalid

When Thinking Subjectively is a Strength

Why Fantasy is Reality - News is Too Often Fantasy

Concept of Regret

The Use of Rumors as a Sieve

I - The Basic Philosophy of Alex's Homeschooling

II - The Basic Philosophy of Alex's Homeschooling

III - The Basic Philosophy of Alex's Homeschooling

IV - The Basic Philosophy of Alex's Home Schooling

V - The Basic Philosophy of Alex's Homeschooling

VI - The Basic Philosophy of Alex's Homeschooling

Daily Guidance of Home Work

Being a Father - One of Life's Great Simple Pleasures

Mini Adventures in Life

A Book in Review - Critical Thinking Skills

Hippocampal Growth Through Positive Stimulation

I - Components for Educational Growth

II - Components for Educational Growth

Helicopter Parent - A Rationalization

A "Right" of Passage

Four Principles of Alex's Homeschooling

Formative Years 1-5

Sublimation - A Key to Maturity

The Reason Chinese Students Outperform Most of the World

Feeding Drive Through the Rewarding of Objective Completion

I - Justifiable Confrontation

II - Justifiable Confrontation

Concept of Looking Into the Future

A Middle Aged Man's Advice To Young Couples

Critical Reasoning - Word Against Word

Parental Love - A Key to a Child's Love of Life

Life is Not a Circle - But a Conical Helix

Find Your Carrot in Life

I - 11 Pieces of Wisdom

II - 11 Pieces of Wisdom

III - 11 Pieces of Wisdom

IV - 11 Pieces of Wisdom

V - 11 Pieces of Wisdom

VI - 11 Pieces of Wisdom

VII - 11 Pieces of Wisdom

VIII - 11 Pieces of Wisdom

IX - 11 Pieces of Wisdom

X - 11 Pieces of Wisdom

XI - 11 Pieces of Wisdom

Our Way of Helping Our Son Achieve His Dreams

Living Life With Arms Wide Open

Problem Solving Using The Four Principles of Common Sense

An Example of Using Movies as a Means For Discussion

Alleviation of Stress

From Despondence to Conquering Warrior

Raising a Child in a PC Free Zone

The Most Academically Successful in the US - And Why

An After Dinner Talk With Alex

Fighting Spirit

Practice in Rational Thought - A Daily Exercise

Words of Wisdom From a Bonehead

Resource Management

The Reason

Take your time to absorb my thoughts.

What I have done is to relay my life experience...

as I had done for my son, Alex.

I have used layman terms...

rationales...

and examples.

Never merely take the word of anyone.

Always look to empirical evidence to confirm.

I am not an expert in anything.

However...

do know that my thoughts have allowed me to live my life well.

And in doing so...

it had allowed me to teach my son how to live his life well...

as well.

And so...

you will be able to take a shortcut in life

by reading and understanding my thoughts...

so you may also teach your children.

The great importance of our thoughts lay in the motivation

they provide to generate the positive actions

which give the positive results in life.

In the final article in this series...

I will delve into the practical application

of the philosophy and psychology I have espoused...

for without the application of knowledge...

all will come to naught.

The final article will be short...

as it encompasses but a few basic principles.

Part II: The Mindset Of A Parent: A Fundamental Philosophical Look

noreply@blogger.com (Shiroi Tora) — Sat, 14 Jan 2023 12:49:00 +0000

Album: Connections

Artists:

Flute and Bass Flute - Paul Horn

Keyboard: Steve Halpern

Do you know why the proverbial monk on the mountain...

to whom is so often referred in many an ancient tale, exists...

and why so often it is an arduous and sometimes dangerous walk up

just to be able to have him answer a few questions?

And...

do you know why so many never even take that walk in the first place?

First of all...

it acts as a sieve...

to filter out all those of whom would only do that which is comfortable...

instead of doing the necessary regardless of the pain or sacrifice.

Secondly...

it causes an inherent investment by all those of whom make that initial climb.

It is only when people willingly invest in themselves do they ever

really pay attention in the first place.

And so it should be with parenthood.

A child's purpose...

is not to make you happy...

and he or she is not to push forth your nebulous agendas.

If you even feel that your child should serve any purpose other than to

fulfill his or her own dreams...

then you are not a parent to be...

you are a want to be tyrant...

an impotent minion of your own selfish desires...

to want to become a general of your own soldiers

in your lust to have your children serve in your army...

and in subservience to your particular ideology.

You see this time and again...

the incredibly selfish and egocentric "parents"

who willingly sacrifice their whole families on the alter of their ideology...

those of whom pump propaganda into the little minds of their children...

filling it with hate, fear, and envy.

They are doing it just to look good in the eyes of their group...

for mere social points to give themselves "status"...

and over that of the open, innocent and love filled hearts of their own children.

Some simply do not know how to combat the plethora

of propaganda so prevalent in today's society.

The tools of philosophy give you a way to discern truth and right...

for without knowing those...

all is lost from the beginning.

Philosophy is not a belief system...

it is a way to efficiently and effectively think for yourself...

a way to be able to know truth from fiction and propaganda...

so you may guide your family to happiness and prosperity.

The history of philosophy...

the origins of it...

the main proponents of it...

the multitude of categories it has been divided into...

NONE OF THESE MATTER.

It is in how to discern truth and right...

and how to apply it...

that matters.

Your goal for the achievement of anything in life...

lay in the positive actions and steps towards the achievement...

the positive result.

The very first thing a prospective parent should do before even considering

becoming a parent is to familiarize yourself with some fundamental concepts of:

Basic Philosophy and Logic:

(Which gives a way to discover fundamental truths)

Basic Inductive and Deductive Reasoning

Basic structure of a Rational Argument

Differences between Objective Reasoning and Subjective Flow

Morals: The basic and universal concepts upon which virtues and ethics are defined

Virtues: The principles which lead to actions of high morality

Ethics: The governing rules guiding virtuous behavior

--------------------------

THE MOUNTAIN

The following trek to the top of the mountain to meet the monk...

is not so long.

It covers this and the following two articles

(Philosophy - Critical Reasoning / Psychology / Application)

It is not even dangerous...

except to ignorance.

Below are some of my many articles

on basic real life philosophy and the importance of Critical Reasoning.

I will have further links in the following two articles.

By reading and digesting the articles...

you will be making your way up the mountain.

And once you have reached the top...

you will find that you will be standing alone...

for it will be you who will be the monk for your children...

not because of my wisdom...

but because of your new found wisdom.

Philosophy for Children

Concept of Right and Wrong

Morality / Amorality / Immorality

The Value of Rational Argumentation

Morality

I - A Talk About Life

II - A Talk About Life

(A thorough breakdown of a Positive Spiral)

III - A Talk About Life

IV - A Talk About Life

V - A Talk About Life (Logic Discussed)

VI - A Talk About Life (A further breakdown of Logic)

VII - A Talk About Life

The Value and Meaning of Life

Dinner and a Talk

A Reasoned Argument for Critical Reasoning

Moral Relativism

There are many more articles...

but these form the core of what you will need to teach your children...

that of basic Critical Reasoning.

The next article will deal with the psychological aspects.

Part I: Mindset Of A Parent

noreply@blogger.com (Shiroi Tora) — Wed, 11 Jan 2023 06:18:00 +0000

Song: Land of Oz

Artist: Hilary Stagg

Right now...

Alex and his mother are in flight on their way to Japan

for a three week vacation.

My wife had just sent this to me.

My wife and I had given this to Alex as a graduation gift

(He had just graduated from UC Berkeley a few weeks ago.)

I, of course, will be posting many articles chronicling Alex's Japan trip

once they return and my wife sends me the photos from there.

-----------------------------------

I had chosen the above song as it has a feel of deep satisfaction in retrospect...

of a mellow journey of the mind as it reflects upon magical memories of the past...

and of a projected silky smooth and adventurous journey going forwards

(the true meaning of Peace of Mind...more on this later).

I am now 63 years old...

I have been fully, and comfortably, retired for almost 12 years now.

I am living my life's passions with a deep sense of Peace of Mind...

a serenity which allows me to be so happy in life...

of being able to fully enjoy the great simple and creative pleasures in life...

of having no dark clouds on the horizon...

while having nothing but unexplored new horizons for which to look forwards.

Our son is doing so well in his life as he is living his passions in life...

as well as throughly preparing himself to continue living his passions

for the rest of his life...

all the while making a good living while also earning a good retirement.

Are my words mere bragging?

Am I a narcissistic lout bent on droning on about myself...

about my great fortunes in life?

I am...

in my heart...

a teacher...

a pathfinder for others.

Why?

Because...

it is a way to automatically double pleasure in life...

that of giving...

as well as that of receiving.

Why do I think I am, at all, qualified to be such a man?

Do I think I am special?

It is precisely because I know I am not special

that I know I can help others.

My strength lies in my commonality with others.

This is how I know that my path...

my way of thinking...

my attitude...

is a path which most others may follow.

All I have over most people...

is life experience...

an examined and tested life.

And, as an introvert...

I have spent a lifetime closely observing others

(and of myself in the movie of the mind played back in retrospect)...

and playing a game of causal connections and forming a prediction of behavior...

and then testing it through more observation of the persons or the group...

of their resulting actions and inactions...

to sharpen my thoughts on human behavior in general.

And, like most introverts...

I easily feel what others feel as described in their body english, facial expressions...

intonation, what is said and how, and in what is not said...

in the length of pauses...

in the precision and concision of their thoughts as expressed in speech...

and the rapidity and flow of their words...

and in the patterns and movements of their eyes as they think...

of how the overall flow of the body and eyes are on beat and in a rhythmical fashion...

or in an interrupted syncopated fashion...

and all coupled with the resulting actions or inactions of the person over time.

This comes intuitively in most people.

It is nothing special as most do this as a matter of course.

However...

what most people do not do...

is to closely observe in the first place.

Without doing this...

no cause and effect may be observed...

so that over time...

a greater understanding of others...

as well as of ourselves...

may be had.

One other thing most people do not do...

is to spend a lot of time in solitude.

Most people spend too much time around others...

and so...

they live in that one small moment in time...

never codifying their past...

and so...

never being able to see their future.

We are far more alike than are we different.

People follow general modes and patterns of behavior...

and give clues to their heart and mind through their actions and non-actions.

We continually see slightly different versions or manifestations

of a person's heart and mind for a given general stimulus.

The big question is...

How many times must we learn the same lessons in life?

--------------

Why put any effort into teaching others...

why not just live my life in respectful silence

and fully enjoy myself without being so arrogant

as to think of myself as a teacher of anything?

Because...

just as misery loves company...

so does love.

As I know the deep serenity inherent in living a certain way...

as I have already proven it to myself as I continue to reap that which I have sown...

as I have seen others in life sabotage themselves through hedonistic actions...

and as I have spent over my lifetime...

much time in solitude (I love solitude)...

in which I have reflected, dissected, simplified and codified...

and have then generalized thoughts into concepts of understanding...

and then into practical methods of application...

and, again...

with the knowledge that I am an average man...

better in some things...

and not so good in others...

I know...

as surely as I can see the path behind me...

and that which still lies before me...

that with but a few words (okay...not so few :)...

I can positively change others' lives for the better.

Why is this so important to me to do so?

It allows me to feel connected to others...

to be able to speak heart to heart with others

in a way not usually possible face to face...

other than with family members.

And yes...

I have had many an embarrassing encounter with others...

not only at work...

but during social occasions.

I tend to not follow social decrees or place myself in the obligatory social webs

which prevent too much intimacy so quickly and in the wrong place.

A lot of people think I am strange...

while at the same time...

I think they are.

I know people must have orbits which distinguish levels of intimacy...

and which serve to protect them from unwanted closeness.

It is not that I cannot judge those levels...

it is just that the only way to find those of whom are of like minds...

and so, with whom to share true and deep conversation...

to show true connection...

to be of like hearts and minds...

to have a true and deep friendship...

to live life truly loving others

(it is one of the things which makes life so magical)...

is to breach those limits.

It is through my novels that I give examples of a way of thinking...

and of a way of living

(The Kuma Trilogy and The Halo Trilogy...so far)...

but I will delve into these and other thoughts in the following articles

in brief so as to give young people an immediate guide to living well.

It is especially important to parents to be...

as young future lives depend on them.

----------------------

I have so much to say on the mindset of a parent.

I am thinking of dividing this topic into several parts...

as I wish to delve into the philosophical aspects which provide

the fundamentals of a fruitful attitude of a person before they become a parent...

the psychological aspects which not only provide the impetus for future actions...

but which provide the adaptability to ever changing real life scenarios...

as well as providing the fuel for all future actions.

I will also cover the practical aspects...

the all important positive actions in life which actually bring about the positive changes...

without which...

everything remains...

but a dream.

Christmas Eve In San Francisco

noreply@blogger.com (Shiroi Tora) — Fri, 30 Dec 2022 09:25:00 +0000

Song: Ballerina

Group: Robin Trower

Just a few days after I left...

my wife got some beautiful sunset shots over the course of a few days...

and all within a very short walk from home.

Both of us are sky watchers.

Interesting cloud formations usually mean beautiful sunsets.

San Francisco on the far side of the bay from our ocean condo.

The rest of the photos are of Alex and his mother taking a short ferry ride to

San Francisco to eat out at a restaurant they wanted to try for supper...

and for a night stroll to see some Christmas Eve activities.

This is the restaurant my wife had chosen.

Alex had pork belly in a ginger and chili sauce and Indian bread.

My wife had a rainbow salad.

There was an ice skating rink near some major stores.

Alex and his mother near the ferry building.

They rode back in comfort after a very satisfying night in San Francisco.

Alex and his mother are home.

My wife told me they had such a great time in San Francisco.

With the ease at which San Francisco may be visited...

they go often, and always have a wonderful time.

Our ferry port is a hidden gem.

A short, uncrowded, but very scenic ride only costs $4.50 each way.

It is the way to go to explore San Francisco from our area.

More About Alex

noreply@blogger.com (Shiroi Tora) — Thu, 29 Dec 2022 01:53:00 +0000

Song: Amazing Journey

Group: The Who

If you haven't read the previous article

(Alex Graduates From UC Berkeley)...

please do so...

as it tells much about his earlier life.

I finally found out what research Alex was involved with as part of his

SURF Scholarship at UC Berkeley.

It is explained above...

and no...

I still don't understand much more about it.

Alex named but a few of his teaching and tutoring exploits below.

Below is an explanation of some of his high school and university math competitions...

and involvements while at university.

He has also been involved in online tutoring math students across the US...

and an international student as well.

Alex qualified and participated in AIME as well.

Below is what Alex had taught at the 2022 math camp at Harvard University

for very advanced High School students

(Alex had written up his lecture notes before he knew for sure he would be going).

He had previously taught at Stanford University (2020)

for very advanced High School students...

although their curriculum was slightly different.

Alex loves teaching, doing pure math research, and designing math competitions.

We eagerly await his responses from the various grad schools

he had applied to.

My wife will be moving near whichever grad school he chooses...

to continue cooking all of Alex's favorite meals so he may just concentrate

on his studies and research.

I will continue to care for my aging mother here in Reno, NV

(with my two sisters)...

as she needs 24 hour care.

Alex Graduates From UC Berkeley

noreply@blogger.com (Shiroi Tora) — Tue, 20 Dec 2022 02:43:00 +0000

Song: FF 6 Prelude

(Prelude because this is just the beginning of Alex's magical journey in life).

Alex officially graduated from UC Berkeley

on December 17th 2022.

First a little background...

Alex had first entered university just after the 8th grade...

(although he could have gone in the 6th grade as his official SAT

at that time was hundreds of points higher than the average prospective student

entering the University of Nevada, Reno).

However, not only did we think he, as an elementary school age student...

to be too young at that time...

but Alex wanted to go to a middle school so he could participate

in Mathcounts. We had been homeschooling him prior to this.

(the national mathematics competition for middle schoolers)...

he made the State team in the 6th and 7th grade...

and in the 8th grade...

he not only made the Nationals...

but he won the Individual State Championship...

Number 1...

the goal he had set for himself...

and had achieved.

In the summer, just after 8th grade...

he was accepted into the University of Nevada, Reno

(Not only were his ACT scores at this time

the same average as students being accepted into MIT...

but he also had perfect math and essay scores. When the recruiter

at the University of Nevada, Reno had seen Alex's scores...

he was immediately accepted as a student).

It was at this point that we enrolled him into an online high school

so his high school schedule wouldn't interfere with his university schedule.

He took all the university math classes he could every semester...

including summer.

We also enrolled him in Mountain College for some other core courses

as they were in conflict with his math courses at UNR.

This allowed him to take multiple courses at the same time...

free from conflict with his UNR courses, as his math courses were his priority.

Not only were his math courses advanced enough...

but his grades in them were so high that almost all of his courses

from UNR and Mountain College were accepted at UC Berkeley...

(he only needed one more year's worth of a foreign language at UC Berkeley).

So...

by the time he entered UC Berkeley...

he was already considered a 3rd year student.

However...

instead of graduating 2 years early...

he wanted to continue at UC Berkeley so he could take

as many graduate courses as he could...

as well as to work on research, before he graduated.

And so...

last Saturday...

he graduated with Honors and Distinction...

as well as one of only 14 Phi Beta Kappas in his undergrad graduating class

of some 700+ students.

I arrived late on the Tuesday before his graduation.

My wife and I took a couple of sunset walks along the ocean walkway.

The top portion of one of the two towers from which the cables support the whole of the

Golden Gate Bridge is visible from this particular point of the ocean walkway.

A telephoto of the shot before this one.

A couple of days later...

Alex's last final at UC Berkeley finished at 10 PM on Thursday...

and we picked him up on campus.

On a previous final...

I believe it was in his Number Theory class...

he had gotten 100% on it...

and, of course, he had gotten an A in the class...

and he also did very well in his other courses.

He also thinks he did well in his last class.

And so...

we were just a couple of days away from his official graduation.

The day of his graduation...

we first walked to the famous gate at one of the entrances to UC Berkeley.

We then dropped off Alex at the graduating student's entrance...

and then walked back to the family's entrance.

Alex...

one of only 14 out of his graduating class to be accepted into

Phi Beta Kappa (The asterisk behind his name).

Many US Presidents were Phi Beta Kappa.

At first...

we couldn't locate Alex.

He could have been on either side of the auditorium.

My wife texted him and asked him to use the flashlight function on his phone...

and we located him.

He was on the left of us...in the front section...

fourth row up...

and third from the right.

My elder sister and her eldest son attended Alex's graduation with us.

Her eldest son, Christopher, graduated from UC Davis in Psychology

some years ago.

I use to baby sit him so many years ago.

He has grown into a fine young man.

He presently works in a very well known high tech company in the San Francisco Bay area.

The golden cords signify his graduating with honors and distinction...

one for each.

He had to write a mathematical thesis as part of his mathematics honors program...

as well as some other criteria besides having to have a high GPA in his major...

and distinction because of his overall high GPA in all of his classes.

Anyway...

Alex is well on his way on his road to his future.

We are now awaiting replies from the graduate schools to which he had applied.

It could be another five months before the last of them reply.

We took BART back...

and then shortly afterwards...

we took the ferry to San Francisco for a celebratory

supper in honor of Alex.

My wife had found a restaurant near the San Francisco ferry building.

It was a Peruvian Seafood restaurant with good reviews.

Our ferry arrived.

We sat outside and had a beautiful ride to San Francisco.

My elder sister and her son with Alex.

We departed our ferry building.

You could see San Francisco on the far side of the bay.

My elder sister and her son went to the other side of the ferry to take some photos of San Francisco.

They then came back to our side...

as the ferry would shortly turn towards San Francisco and all the best views

were on our side.

This was the first time that either my elder sister or her son had taken this ferry.

In the future...

instead of driving to San Francisco...

my elder sister and her husband will just go to our ferry and cross the bay on it.

The sky took on a cherry glow.

Although these photos are out of focus and blurred...

I wanted to capture the cherry red skies.

I was handholding my camera while using the telephoto on a moving boat...

so...

We disembarked and walked but a few minutes to our destination.

At the restaurant.

The restaurant had great ambiance.

The taro chips came with this green dip.

I don't think it was guacamole...

but it was spicy and absolutely delicious.

The fries were perfectly done steak fries.

Alex had fish...

I think salmon.

I had this delicious prawn over shrimp rice with some kind of green sauce.

I had never before had anything like it.

It was so good.

My wife had two smaller dishes...

this one some kind of quinoa dish...

and the bottom one...

some kind of tuna sashimi dish.

Alex's salmon and prawn dish.

My wife and I shared a nice desert...

as did my sister and her son.

Alex got his own chocolate cake with some kind of gelato on the side.

We then walked to the photo pier next to our ferry pier

to take some night shots of the San Francisco skyline.

Alex taking some photos.

Chris and Alex on the freely rotating seats which lined the end of the pier.

The San Francisco - Oakland Bay Bridge is in the background.

There was a party boat which slowly followed the coastline of San Francisco.

The lower deck appeared to have a bar...

and the whole upper deck appeared to be a dance floor.

They were playing some kind of dance music as it passed by.

I was thinking as it passed by that they weren't playing one of the greatest dance songs ever...

Gonna Make You Sweat.

Any song that could make you feel like dancing like that one song...

is timeless.

I am sorry...

but any dance venue that doesn't feature that song...on a loop...

doesn't know great dance music :)

My sister's photo...

of me taking photos.

We then went to our boarding dock for our return ferry.

We are departing here.

I love the view of San Francisco at night.

It is still my favorite city in the world.

I just love to watch San Francisco recede into the night as the ferry speeds us back home.

We are nearing home here.

Our ferry in the background.

Our car was just a few second walk from here.

My elder sister and her son left shortly after our arrival back home.

On Sunday afternoon (my last day there)...

we headed out to eat at an Asian mall (a short 10 minute drive from home).

Flowers still bloom in the winter here.

We wanted to try a new Japanese restaurant there.

Alex ordered a sushi roll...

sashimi...

and a fried and spiced crab.

My wife and I shared shrimp tempura and takoyaki for our appetizer...

and we each had beef sukiyaki...

or what should have been :(

This was NOT sukiyaki.

There were NONE of the correct sauces.

As a matter of fact...

there was not the slightest hint of any Japanese flavoring.

(the restaurant was not owned by a Japanese person, or had a Japanese cook.

Had it been...this abomination would not have been served...

and what makes it worse is that not only is it easy to make...

all they have to do is to buy a Japanese cookbook...AND FOLLOW THE RECIPE).

However...

not even a ruined dish could put a damper on this day...

as I was still so happy for Alex.

His graduating from UC Berkeley with honors and distinction

made my whole trip so worthwhile.

___________________

Some photos my wife took while I was there:

My wife liked taking pictures of me taking pictures :)

------------------------

Now...

I very well know that I was very fortunate in life...

to not only have such a son as is Alex...

but to have a wife whom had dedicated her life to our son.

However...

our pursuing our path was not one of providence or mere great fortune.

I already knew from the beginning that a traditional family

(father earns a living...stay at home full time mother)...

would afford our offspring the best chance at a better life.

Neither of us would deviate from this path because

it was what was best for our son...Alex.

IT WAS SO WORTH IT.

To all young women...

not everyone should be a parent.

Perhaps motherhood is not for you.

If having a career is what is important to you...

do it.

This is not a denigration of non traditional families...

Some mothers must work...

this I fully realize.

I do not look down upon you.

Life is somewhat complicated...

but by design...

the traditional family cannot be beaten if it is possible to do so.

So...

if you can afford to do it...

having a full time stay at home mother is what is best for the child.

No one can do it better...

no one is more important to the children...

to society...

to our future as a civilization...

as is a full time mother...

(or even a full time stay at home father).

Alex's mother was the chief navigator of Alex's future.

Alex was, and is, the captain of his ship.

I was merely the builder of the sturdy ship from which

we would stay afloat and so...

be able to stay on course even in the worst of storms.

I, as a man, had built our ship from sturdy timbers

specifically so my family would not have to worry about our future.

It was from our sure and steady platform that my wife...

Alex's mother...

could perform her magic as a mother.

Her steady love and affection...

her unrelenting researching of the near and far objectives

to complete to reach the goal for Alex to achieve...

her constant support and teaching of the academic basics from

infant hood until I retired and could take over his basic subjects

while she did the deep research needed to ensure

Alex had the advanced material in math that we could not personally explain

(he had long before eclipsed our ability to teach him directly in math)...

as well as continuing to work on his organizational skills...

is what gave Alex such a head start...

upon and from which he would steadily grow.

And...

this is very important...

when it came to Alex...

my wife and I worked as a team.

What was best for his future...

we did.

We were...and are...

fully prepared to...

and fully willing and able to move to anywhere in the world

that would best serve Alex in the future.

Again...

I had prepared for this freedom early on.

That is why I stayed in my particular profession.

From near the beginning...

decades ago...

I looked at the future...

defined the goal...

considered all the major affecting variables...

including necessary provisions...

time to destination...

time left over...

necessary objectives...

and how to effect the desired result.

I had to choose the more sure route...

and in doing so...

I had to forego mere immediate personal passions

and satisfactions in a profession.

I took the more slow and steady approach...

but one which had given freedom much earlier (early retirement)...

and very little risk of losing a job (a necessary governmental job)...

and one which had a fairly high salary as well as a high salary in retirement.

To all young men...

never forget...

the first two steps of Maslow's hierarchy of needs

(sustenance, safety and security...economically as well as physically)...

is OUR sacred responsibility.

This is the responsibility of men in a traditional marriage.

We cannot blame women for not fulfilling their roles

if we do not fulfill ours.

That is why so many decades ago...

I had chosen to forego a profession of great adventure...

for one which I knew would serve my potential future family best.

I knew I didn't have to love it...

hell...

I knew I didn't even have to like it...

but...

I knew I had to do it.

(This one gem of advice I had learned in the Army

from a battle hardened NCO...You don't have to like it...you just have to do it.)

It wasn't just his gruff and graveled voice and his hardened look

that hit me to the core...

it was his stoic outlook which made me admire him.

It was the combat battle hardened non commissioned officers that I learned the most from

when I first arrived in my permanent unit when I was just 17 years old.

It was from them that I had gotten so many gems of wisdom.)

But...

I also knew that enjoyment of what you must do...

is the intelligent thing to do...

as without the reframing of your perspective...

life would be filled with dread and drudgery.

So...

it was this path...

the surer path of economic safety and security for my future family that

I had decided to not only do the necessary...

but I had decided to enjoy myself along the way.

And...

yes...

IT WAS ALL WORTH IT.

I AM SO PROUD OF MY SON, ALEX.

BUT...

I am also filled with deep respect and gratitude towards my wife...

the stay at home mother who had made all the difference in our son's life.

Once again...

she was...

and is...

not only the chief navigator of Alex's path in life...

but she is steadily teaching him the art of navigation...

so he may fully steer his life...

and hopefully later...

be able to teach his children how to fully captain their ships...

but then again...

if he chooses wisely...

his future wife will become their family's chief navigator.

But what will make Alex's life so much better than even mine

is that he is not only building a sturdy ship for his future family...

he will be living his life's passion at the same time.

It simply doesn't get any better than this.

My Wife's Latest Sunset Walks - Dec 2022

noreply@blogger.com (Shiroi Tora) — Wed, 07 Dec 2022 11:19:00 +0000

Song: Stars

Artist: Helen Jane Long

My wife loves taking sunset walks on the ocean walkway just in front of our condo.

These shots are from her latest walks.

San Francisco and the Golden Gate Bridge is visible in the background of this photo.

This area is but a few minute walk from our condo.

This is of the nearby waterway.

In the background you can see the Golden Gate Bridge.

People like to fish off the water break near the harbor entrance.

Taken from just in front of our condo complex on the ocean walkway.

These homes run up the left side of the harbor.

These last three shots were again taken from just in front of the condo complex.

My wife just loves taking almost nightly walks because she is frequently

treated to beautiful sunsets and is always greeted by

the fresh ocean breeze of the San Francisco Bay.

I will be visiting them next week for a few days.

My wife is going to buy a delicious roast duck, lo mein, beef chow fun...

and a variety of items from our favorite bakery for me to eat when I arrive.

A few days after my arrival...

I will be attending Alex's graduation from UC Berkeley.

My wife just took this photo of Alex busily sending in more applications

for graduate school.

He is also preparing for his last finals at UC Berkeley.

Although Alex is very busy...

he loves studying and working towards his future.

-----------------------------

I will say it again...

life keeps getting sweeter for those of whom prepare for it.

Alex's life is wide open...

he will have many an adventure...

and though there will be storms in life...

he is prepared to weather them...

for his ship is built strong and sturdy.

His captaining skills are constantly being honed...

he has provisioned himself well...

and we will always provide a safe harbor for him.

This will allow him to venture forth without trepidation...

to explore new horizons with an adventurous heart.

There are so many great things in life ahead of him.

He goes forth with full sails and fair weather.

------------------

Dream...

Plan well...

and stay the course.

I fully retired over 11 years ago (age 51)...

and my family and I won't have any money worries for the rest of our lives

because I had planned my life...

and had stuck to the plan.

Retirement has been...

and will continue to be...

the fantastic dream and journey that I had envisioned it would be...

no...

far...

far better.

That carrot I had always kept in my mind...

that dream that had kept me walking forwards with a brave heart

had turned out to be far sweeter than what I had initially dreamt it would be.

But what makes me the happiest is the knowledge that my son's life

is going to be even better...

far...far sweeter than even mine.

He has always been a far better man than I have ever been.

His vision for his future is even clearer...

his journey is walked with a surety of eventual victory...

for he has never wavered...

he has never been lost or in doubt.

He is truly a warrior...

the most fearsome one of all...

an intellectual warrior.

Alex Goes To New Orleans

noreply@blogger.com (Shiroi Tora) — Wed, 23 Nov 2022 05:35:00 +0000

Song: City Of New Orleans

Artist: Arlo Guthrie

Alex just got back from a Mathcounts problem designers meeting

in New Orleans.

They had chosen the final layout of the problems which are going to be used on all

the Mathcounts competitions...

from the School, Chapter, State, and National competitions.

Alex is one of the six problem designers for the Mathcounts competitions.

He had a great time in New Orleans.

They ate out at different restaurants and talked business and pleasure.

Alex is feeling much more comfortable traveling on his own.

Alex said the alligator bites tasted like chicken.

Alex is home now...

and busy preparing for his upcoming finals at UC Berkeley.

He graduates in a few weeks...

and that is when I will see him again.

Alex is growing up so fast...

and I couldn't be happier for him.

After graduation...

he and his mother will be taking an extended vacation to Japan

as part of his graduation gift.

Alex has much to look forwards to in life...

as he constantly prepares for his future...

and so, his past and present are ever so sweet.

Alex Helping At The UC Berkeley Math Tournament

noreply@blogger.com (Shiroi Tora) — Thu, 10 Nov 2022 06:31:00 +0000

Song: To Zanarkand

Performing Artist: John Oeth

Original Composer: Nobuo Uematsu

Alex had helped run the UC Berkeley Math Tournament recently

(he had also helped write the problems used in the tournament).

Alex said that everything went well and that he had a lot of fun.

Alex had spent most of his time grading the proof round...

and helped run the tie breaker rounds.

He also said that he also helped grade the online tests...

(I am assuming that others from around the nation may participate

in the BMT in real time through some remote mass participation interface)

and that, as always...

he had a lot of fun grading the online tests.

Ah...spoken as a true teacher of the future.

At the event...

Alex said that he had once again met and briefly talked with...

Po Shen Lo...

the great mathematician and Professor of Mathematics

at Carnegie Mellon University.

He was giving some sort of lecture.

Most in the audience were the parents of some of the many competitors

at the UC Berkeley Math Tournament.

For much of the time...

Alex was in a room with the other staff at the BMT where they

all were busy grading the events of the competition.

Alex is still busy applying to graduate schools.

In a couple of months...

he and his mother are going on an extended vacation to Japan.

Alex is having the time of his life

as the excitement of his future unfolds before him.

Alex And His Mother At A VR Exhibition

noreply@blogger.com (Shiroi Tora) — Fri, 28 Oct 2022 13:55:00 +0000

Song: The Last Of Us Theme

Classical Guitar Cover

Just the other day...

Alex and his mother went to see a VR exhibition.

They did it as part of my wife's birthday celebration.

Although, they hadn't taken many photos since the experience was

visual through the VR goggles.

However, my wife said it was an out of this world experience.

Alex is very busy putting in his applications to various universities

to be accepted as a doctoral candidate in their graduate program.

He will start to receive replies about mid Feb until June or so.

And so...

he will soon be embarking upon another great journey on his quest

to becoming a university professor of mathematics.

Alex graduates this December from UC Berkeley...

and this is when I will be seeing him next.

I am so proud of Alex's drive and accomplishments...

all of which are a direct result of him following his dream.

Another Day Trip To San Francisco

noreply@blogger.com (Shiroi Tora) — Mon, 05 Sep 2022 06:48:00 +0000

Song: One Man's Dream

Group: Yanni

Yesterday...

Alex and his mother decided to revisit San Francisco for a quick day trip.

They had gone to...

SalesForce Park...

Yerba Buena Park...

and to a small downtown mall.

We had actually been here 18 years prior to this day.

Alex then...

...and now.

And purely by coincidence...

Alex was in almost the exact same spot

(look at the water patterns).

Well...okay...as it being the center of the falls...

it is a natural place for a photo :)

Alex likes sour gummi types of candies as a rare treat.

Alex and his mother on their way back home.

The lights of The Oakland Bay Bridge dance in differing patterns

in a computerized sequence.

They arrived home after another beautiful day in San Francisco.

The ferry is not only so conveniently located to the marina condo...

it is very inexpensive.

No hustle and bustle of traffic...

no parking worries...

just a short but beautiful ride whenever they feel the desire.

Actually, the ferry ride is one of the highlights of any trip to San Francisco.

A Cool Change Of Pace: Presidio Park S.F.

noreply@blogger.com (Shiroi Tora) — Sun, 21 Aug 2022 06:53:00 +0000

Song: Cool Change

Group: Little River Band

The other day...

Alex and his mother decided to take a short trip to San Francisco

to enjoy the day at Presidio Park.

Even though the ferry building at the marina is but a short walk from home...

as Alex and his mother knew they would be doing quite a bit of walking

once in San Francisco (over 15,000 steps as per my wife's iPhone)...

they drove to the ferry building to start their day...

not because they were tired then...

but they knew they would be so at the end of the day.

I have spent some time in a few major cities...

and each has its own unique draws...

and most of its citizens have a love of their city...

and so it is with me.

I grew up in the San Francisco Bay Area (Santa Clara)...

and I had taken many a trip to San Francisco.

For me...

besides the friendly faces...

the colorful surroundings and beautiful attractions...

it is the ambiance and cool refreshing ocean breezes that make it so memorable.

Rarely have I seen the all business attitude so prevalent in so many other major cities...

the dour look of people so stressed by their daily rat race that they walk hurriedly

and keep their eyes down or robotically straight ahead.

In San Francisco...

you will often see smiles of people deeply happy in their lives...

and who could blame them?

They live in (or are visiting) one of the most beautiful places in the world.

The almost constant fresh ocean breeze simply raises spirits the moment one

walks outside. It is what makes it so magical to me.

Even before I took the ferry across the bay...

every so often I had to brave the traffic just to reach this piece of heaven.

San Francisco and Santa Cruz (pier) were my two favorite places to destress while in university.

And...especially as a child of the 60s (I was actually born at the tail end of the 50s)...

everything was so colorful...

from the tie dyed shirts and glittering metallic flake cars...

to the music (60s and 70s especially).

My father often had business to conduct in San Francisco...

and he would often take me along when I was a young child.

The fog really got thick back then...

and I loved it...it was so surreal.

Why would I sit in a car listening to a portable 45 record player or reading...

sometimes for hours on end while my father was conducting his business?

First of all...

I loved the very air of San Francisco...

and I loved watching the people.

However, besides loving the drive to...

and the ambiance of San Francisco...

my father always treated me to hot dogs at a doggie diner...

or to as many cheeseburgers as I wanted.

I could normally eat 5 - 6 cheese burgers in a sitting...even as a young child.

I even liked going food shopping with my mother...

as she always promised me a large cheese burger at the cafe near there.

Although, I got scolded whenever I would eat some of the groceries on the way home.

I would often eat a whole pound of freshly bought sourdough bread before we got home

(she would later buy extra, knowing how much I would eat).

What could she expect?

You don't have a growing young boy near food you want to save for later! :)

Yes, I have always loved food.

But for me...

I have always loved Fisherman's Wharf most of all,

as back then, restaurants, bakeries, and other eateries would vent their cooking exhaust

directly out near or above their entrances

(or in the case of the crab eateries...they would often boil the crabs right out front).

The aroma of their specialties was so enticing.

The smell of freshly boiled crab in combination with the cool ocean breezes...

the music of the street performers and the overall

colors of everything made it all seem fairytale like.

Alex loves San Francisco now...

and with a wonderful ferry ride within walking distance from our marina condo...

his mother loves it as well.

Their ferry to San Francisco (in the background) is arriving at the marina ferry building.

Presidio Park sits at the base of the San Francisco side of the Golden Gate Bridge.

This dog chasing a ball into the ocean...

looks like Bandi (my mother's dog)...

so cute.

Alcatraz Island is in full view from the park...

as is the Golden Gate Bridge.

Right near the San Francisco ferry building sits a collection of cafes and restaurants.

Even though it is so peaceful at the marina condo complex...

and the same magical ocean breezes blow there...

as they can see San Francisco from across the bay...

it sometimes calls out to them for a revisit.

Alex Back From East Coast Trip

noreply@blogger.com (Shiroi Tora) — Thu, 04 Aug 2022 02:46:00 +0000

Song: The Eagle and the Hawk

Artist: John Denver

Alex just got back from a two week math camp at Harvard University

where he and some other instructors taught advanced mathematics

to advanced high school students.

Alex's day started at 7 AM and only ended at 10 PM

(0700 - 2200).

Besides teaching...

Alex was also a chaperone for the students on day trips they took

on the weekends.

On one of the side trips...

Alex visited Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT)

where he also visited with a friend who is a student there.

Alex took a trip on a water ferry.

Alex during his visit with his friend at MIT.

Alex's friend.

They were on the same math team which had competed

at the big three California universities

(UC Berkeley / Stanford University / Harvey Mudd - Caltech)

in advanced high school math competitions starting from when Alex was in 8th grade...

and both were members of The Davidson Academy Math team...The Parallelograms.

Alex on his way back home.

Back home at The San Fransisco International Airport.

His mother met him there and they both went back by BART.

Fireworks At The Marina Condo - Alex Takes A Flight

noreply@blogger.com (Shiroi Tora) — Sun, 17 Jul 2022 10:54:00 +0000

Alex and his mother enjoying

the fireworks on the third of July in front of the marina condo complex.

Alex on his way to the East Coast.

Alex is currently in Massachusetts in preparation for

his two week teaching stint at a summer math camp for high schoolers

at Harvard University.

I am excited for him...

and I can hardly wait to hear all about it once he returns.

A Day Trip To San Francisco For Alex

noreply@blogger.com (Shiroi Tora) — Sun, 03 Jul 2022 23:34:00 +0000

Song: San Francisco

Artist: Scott Mckenzie

The other day...

Alex told his mother that he wished to take a day to enjoy San Francisco.

As it is only a short and beautiful ferry ride from their ocean condo...

they decided to go and enjoy the day.

Alex especially wanted to see the tourist attractions near Fisherman's Wharf.

Both of the ferry buildings...

near home...

and in San Francisco...

are just a short and enjoyable walk from their destinations.

I have been on the ferry several times in past visits to Alex and his mother...

and I just love riding it.

It is not merely the sights along the way...

I simply love the cool ocean breeze from the outside observation deck.

The ocean breeze is so refreshing in its temperature and aroma.

I love San Francisco.

I think it is the most beautiful city in the world...

not just because of the sights...

but because of the cool and fresh breeze which always blows.

I even love the fog which often rolls in.

On their way back home.

As you can see...

it can be foggy in San Francisco...

but just outside of it...

the skies can be blue.

Alex loved his little day trip to San Francisco...

and it is a well deserved one.

He will soon be flying to Harvard University to teach mathematics

for two weeks at a summer math camp for high schoolers.

He is so much looking forwards to going.

Teaching math is his passion.

This is the good life...

living your passions and dreams...

and enjoying the great simple pleasures of life.

Phi Beta Kappa for Alex

noreply@blogger.com (Shiroi Tora) — Sat, 25 Jun 2022 12:05:00 +0000

Song: Storm

Artists: Yoshida Brothers

Just recently, Alex was invited to join

the most prestigious Academic Honor Society in the US...

The Phi Beta Kappa Society.

Alex accepted and he is very happy about it...

as are we.

Things just keep getting better and better for Alex.

I am so glad for him...

for he has always devoted himself to his studies with a deep and undying passion.

This is all part of the ever rising and fruiting positive spiral in life.

Alex is a master at walking this path...

for he has the perseverance to never stop walking towards his dreams...

and this is one of those gems in life along the way which

help speed him on his journey.

Yes, I am so very proud of my son, Alex...

but, as always, he never loses his humility...

and his pure heart is what I treasure most in him.

My Elder Sister and the Photo Shoot

noreply@blogger.com (Shiroi Tora) — Thu, 09 Jun 2022 14:23:00 +0000

Song: Willow's Song

Artist: Aythis (Carline Van Roos)

Yesterday evening...

my elder sister agreed to be my model for the cover of my next book...

The Lady of Fallen Leaf Lake

(I publish under my real name...James Toller).

I wanted a gothic ethereal look to it...

as the Lady arises from the depths of the lake to woo a man into the depths

almost every evening near sunset with her song of the lake on her bass flute

(I will be composing and performing songs for this book...

just as I do for all of my novels).

And...

the photo shoot took place at the actual location I am writing about...

Fallen Leaf Lake

(It lies about 1.5 hours from home...just a little ways from South Lake Tahoe).

And the lady in the above music video had actually given me the idea for this book

as I watched this and another of her music videos (Falling) on YouTube

(I love her music).

The public marina actually closes at 7 PM...

but luckily...

the security didn't kick us out...

although they were standing by from a respectable distance until we left.

My elder sister's husband was also taking photos from his camera on a tripod

from various angles (although all of these photos are mine)...

and his set up made us seem to be professionals...

and so...

the security tacitly allowed us to keep taking pictures until the sun set ended

(Thanks guys...).

I just had to get some sunset photos...

as the clouds overhead told me it would be a nice one.

I had taken over 300 photos as I experimented with angles and lighting...

until I got some which would be perfect for the book cover.

I had originally visited Fallen Leaf Lake with my son...Alex...

some years ago.

It has a special feel to it...

a beauty that is unique to it.

As I wrote the beginning of the story...

I relied upon my memory of our first visit there.

Although I am now in music mode...

I hope to finish the book before summer's end.

As I am retired...

I engage in my passions in life as the mood strikes me...

as I alternate between my passions of writing and music.

If I don't feel inspired...

I don't write...

and so...

I don't put deadlines before me.

However...

music and locations almost always inspire me to write.

I will be using a photo from this photo shoot for my cover.

For the day lit photos...

I was thinking of adding in mist...

and then...

the magic of the sunset changed my mind...

as you will see.

My elder sister had actually held my bass flute for long periods

of time as I changed angles over and over.

I purposely wanted to give the photos a darkened look...

as the Lady is an apparition who lives in the depths of the lake

(It really is hundreds of feet deep).

To give the photos some realism...

I first showed my elder sister how to hold the flute...

and then she would blow into it as I took the photos...

and she had actually started to get some muted notes from it

before the photo shoot ended.

My elder sister wore the robe that she had made for my mother

for this photo shoot.

Fallen Leaf Lake has many private homes surrounding it.

It has a campground near the other side of the lake.

It also has a trail which goes around it...

but the marina has the best vantage point for any sunset shots.

As the sun began to set...

the colors started to come out.

Although the dock plays a part in the story...

I was thinking of misting the photo so the docks were hidden in mist...

but, again, decided against any alterations.

Then I started angling the shots so I wouldn't have to make

any alterations to the photos.

I had lain on my back for some of the shots.

I experimented with some flash shots...

but quickly realized they didn't fit the feel I wanted to express.

And so...

I will decide on a photo at a later time

for use as my next book cover.

We had a great time there...

minus our battle with the mosquitoes.