42 Minutes with your hosts Doug Bolles and Tommy Fulks, speaking with guest David Plate (AKA Dvd Platypus)
Today I was to fill in for Will of The Sync Whole and A Few Shots to Shaman sync blogs, starting our recording at 11:11 am this morning and speaking with the author of this fine blog. I thought I'd recount a strange dream I had.
A Night of Horror . . .
It all began yesterday as I initiated my midday nap. Having no stimulant drugs to propel me into unnatural excitement, I require naps throughout the day. As I entered the REM state, I envisioned flying along a dark road. Becoming lucid, I soared up into the sky into a dense fog. Everything goes fuzzy after this. After a couple of meaningless dreams, I become semi-lucid again. I walked from a rear-entryway into a strange looking white house. It reminded me of one of the model houses from Beetlejuice, everything had a strange artificial quality, almost like those pictures of haunted dolls that carry their unsettling ambiance. Entering the house I notice something strange. The house was like the TARDIS, it looked small on the outside but inside was much larger. Dark hallways with that odd, foggy sunlight common in dreams pouring in. A voice-over narration was saying some things about the house before informing me that it was haunted. The atmosphere was very much like several nightmarish astral projections I've had, where there is chaos within and without, terror behind every movement, dull, unassuming environments painted with dread. It's like being caught within a rift between worlds and having no idea of where to go or what to do but you do things anyway. So I began trying to find a way out of this evil house, but every doorway led to some interdimensional horror - every room seemed to be a portal to a bizarre, violent landscape. This is once again similar to Beetlejuice where there are doors that lead to where they store lost souls, and doors that lead to vast deserts of Saturn housing gargantuan sandworms. Eventually I found two nerdy-looking guys in a room who told me they were paranormal investigators. The next thing I remember, I am on a bed and we are recording the bedspread moving on its own. We review the footage and some sort of entity makes itself clear and it seems to have been acting through the two men as they are apparitions themselves, they disappear in the blink of an eye. There are strange winds blowing through the core of my being and I'm trying to find my way out of this place, but there are no exits, just pathways to strange, totally unnerving realities. I find a window, and outside there is a pool filled with dark blue water. The house seems to be situated on a tiny island floating on a sea of deep purple mist. I break out of the window and land in the pool. I know I have landed partially on land but there is no pain here. Before I am able to exit the pool, something drags me down into the water. I remember at this point as I am powerless to free myself seeing a translucent superimposed image of a Cthulhu-like tentacle-mouthed being standing facing me. He is wearing some sort of Victorian-era clothing, with a top hat and a cane. In the same "superimposed" fashion I begin seeing credits start to roll, as if this were all just some sort of TV show. Blackness, awakening.
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
Monday, June 4, 2012
Transcendental Key 6/4 (meat on the bone)
Today's key: "It's all in your head". Meaning your signature is found in everything you have ever experienced, everything you have collected about how the world works and what has happened is of your own device, of your own process. We have no knowledge of what's outside of our own mental interactions until we transcend the egoic mind and the application of arbitrary, mechanical association.
What does this mean to me? It means there is near-infinite space for expansion, it means there is nearly no limit to what we are capable of learning in this moment as it is sucked into the future. It also means that we are constantly connected to some-nothing that we have no way of immediately perceiving - I believe it acts as an analog to our sense-array, it is the non-being in reference to our being, so to say. A Logos of sorts. Like I said, these keys that I receive/create are like gear-teeth catching notches of problematic conundrums. As soon as that connection is made, it's time for another mystery. This great non-being seems to be the source of all mystery itself, a black hole from which no information escapes. I wonder if that is what I am, experiencing Being in order to create an infinite God with which to feed myself eternally.
In the throes of desperation and confusion one becomes aware of locks chaining them to anchors made of pain. The discovery of these locks is essential to discovery of the self. The keys that one receives during transcendental states hold no purpose without a matching lock. The crests and valleys of space-time unfolding are spiraling revelatory vortices, each dip into the pool of absolute inner chaos observed by the self to see all of itself. They are states to be understood, not feared.
masks guard the key
Seek the locks and the keys shall be received.
And if you ever disagree with me, you're wrong and you're going to hell.
Saturday, June 2, 2012
Time-Mirror Reflections and "Keys"
"A virus is a small infectious agent that can replicate only inside the living cells of an organism."
Everything has its fractal resonator. As we have viruses, parasites, and mosquitoes, in the macro realm we have psychopaths, "demons", archons, whatever you want to call them.
I realize that these destructive forces are essential to our process of transformation. There can be no optimization without evaporation of those forms which lock us into cycles of negative feedback. I am being shown a mirror of sorts in this realization. I am being shown these things are a part of my being, those which I must be aware of to properly proceed in evolving my mind to improve connection with creative dimensions.
Today went a lot better than the past few days. I went to bed at 5 in the morning and slept for 12 hours, making up for all the sleep I lost during the initial withdrawal. Not having a job or any people I have no choice but to interact with regularly has its benefits sometimes. It might sound like I'm overexaggerating things a lot, but you can only refer to your model, and I can only refer to mine.
We are restricted to the expectations we have derived through our history, the patterns we have recorded and have assumed are correct interpretations of "cause and effect". The imagination is full immersion into the flux of the current (redundant?) moment, a transformative destruction of the historic paradigm, and it is of the same experiential fabric as anything else one can experience and is therefore as valid an experience as one's physical reality.
We need not to try and "figure things out" as they happen in the physical world, this process runs entirely on its own and it is our job in this simulation (hot term at the moment), potential fractal-time recursion (endless loop), to program our death, to expand the lens of our perception to imagine ourselves fully into the fold of love itself. We have an infinite amount of perceptions available to us, like the holographic nature of language and its symbols constructing, deconstructing and evolving, and yet we rely on a small set of these perceptions to experience life through. Such is the nature of the inner bloodsucking perceptikon, the inner voice which tells us "that's not true, that's not valid, unacceptable", the scientist, the atheist, the christian, the culture morbidly obese on its own bovine waste. Everything is at once indeterminate, meaningless, false and true. In some sense. (thank you RAW)
I accept the presence of this entity, but it must accept that it depends upon me, and its own death is inevitable as is "mine". It dies with the death of my thoughts, and I know that I am more than my thoughts and my body. I perceive this fold, I am transcendent of their interactions. Enmeshed, I evolve through their interactions, I enact this simulation to untie knots. I am hunting in a fashion in which I become mock prey to attract the predators which I then destroy. (note: in what way do my actions in this sense differ from the above "perceptikon"? They are a similar program, but toward a different end. The goal of the perceptikon is to load viral programs into my hardware and turn me into a "zombie" feeding its creator, while my goal in this particular interaction is to act as a sort of hyperdimensional anti-virus software. Where its goal is strictly offensive, mine is defensive. It struck first, etc. It's a form of spiritual aikido.)
In other news, I have decided to post here the "temporary keys" which I receive during meditation, in order to stitch together a sort of pattern between them. They are usually one sentence only.
Yesterday's key was this: "Don't force anything". This key lasted me until today. Tomorrow its time-release cyanide pill will disperse and kill it entirely, its function having been used on its respective lock and its usefulness purged.
Everything has its fractal resonator. As we have viruses, parasites, and mosquitoes, in the macro realm we have psychopaths, "demons", archons, whatever you want to call them.
I realize that these destructive forces are essential to our process of transformation. There can be no optimization without evaporation of those forms which lock us into cycles of negative feedback. I am being shown a mirror of sorts in this realization. I am being shown these things are a part of my being, those which I must be aware of to properly proceed in evolving my mind to improve connection with creative dimensions.
Today went a lot better than the past few days. I went to bed at 5 in the morning and slept for 12 hours, making up for all the sleep I lost during the initial withdrawal. Not having a job or any people I have no choice but to interact with regularly has its benefits sometimes. It might sound like I'm overexaggerating things a lot, but you can only refer to your model, and I can only refer to mine.
We are restricted to the expectations we have derived through our history, the patterns we have recorded and have assumed are correct interpretations of "cause and effect". The imagination is full immersion into the flux of the current (redundant?) moment, a transformative destruction of the historic paradigm, and it is of the same experiential fabric as anything else one can experience and is therefore as valid an experience as one's physical reality.
We need not to try and "figure things out" as they happen in the physical world, this process runs entirely on its own and it is our job in this simulation (hot term at the moment), potential fractal-time recursion (endless loop), to program our death, to expand the lens of our perception to imagine ourselves fully into the fold of love itself. We have an infinite amount of perceptions available to us, like the holographic nature of language and its symbols constructing, deconstructing and evolving, and yet we rely on a small set of these perceptions to experience life through. Such is the nature of the inner bloodsucking perceptikon, the inner voice which tells us "that's not true, that's not valid, unacceptable", the scientist, the atheist, the christian, the culture morbidly obese on its own bovine waste. Everything is at once indeterminate, meaningless, false and true. In some sense. (thank you RAW)
I accept the presence of this entity, but it must accept that it depends upon me, and its own death is inevitable as is "mine". It dies with the death of my thoughts, and I know that I am more than my thoughts and my body. I perceive this fold, I am transcendent of their interactions. Enmeshed, I evolve through their interactions, I enact this simulation to untie knots. I am hunting in a fashion in which I become mock prey to attract the predators which I then destroy. (note: in what way do my actions in this sense differ from the above "perceptikon"? They are a similar program, but toward a different end. The goal of the perceptikon is to load viral programs into my hardware and turn me into a "zombie" feeding its creator, while my goal in this particular interaction is to act as a sort of hyperdimensional anti-virus software. Where its goal is strictly offensive, mine is defensive. It struck first, etc. It's a form of spiritual aikido.)
In other news, I have decided to post here the "temporary keys" which I receive during meditation, in order to stitch together a sort of pattern between them. They are usually one sentence only.
Yesterday's key was this: "Don't force anything". This key lasted me until today. Tomorrow its time-release cyanide pill will disperse and kill it entirely, its function having been used on its respective lock and its usefulness purged.
Friday, June 1, 2012
Recommended Reading - Quantum Psychology
Quantum Psychology by Robert Anton Wilson on Scribd
This is one of those books that totally caught me off guard and ended up changing my perspective in very good ways. It may blow a few fuses if you're not prepared, but it will most likely be a really fun and engaging read anyway. Easily my number 1 book. Ever.
To my reader(s?)
I must offer a genuine apology for my public display of pitiful hopelessness stretched over the past week or so. As you are probably sick of hearing about, I am in the midst of quitting both ingestion of caffeine and inhalation of carcinogenic smoke containing nicotine. It has affected me much more strongly than I had imagined it would. Last night I was completely immersed in fatigue, depression, hate, and just plain misery. I think I'm over the nicotine withdrawal but this whole quitting caffeine business is really taking a toll on me.
So, I will attempt to avoid posting things that no one could possibly care about. Even though this is my blog and no one else's, I find myself a little ashamed of the poor quality of my recent posts. At the time of contemplation or suffering I use this as a forum to vent my emotions, but perhaps it's just not the best idea, and revealing a side of myself I am better off dealing with on my own.
That being said... There is something incredibly strange about what I've been enduring the past couple of weeks. Maybe even this whole year. It holds the general theme of a battle against evil within my own mind, but the strangest part is that I have the impression that winning will result in peace on earth. I feel myself receiving 'keys', magickal thoughtforms which temporarily fend away the encroaching darkness. But as soon as I find these mantras working, events will occur which negate those models for interaction and introduce contexts in which they do not work. This is part of the reason I'm trying not to tell people how I am currently viewing existence, because my viewpoint is changing constantly. In my mind I'm just sketching and erasing, sketching and erasing, but not quite getting a good view of what I'm drawing, or even what it is I'm drawing. I feel like in my mind I'm doing everything I can to tune in to an optimized stream of thought that will allow me to be at peace with my surroundings and to transcend the fear within me. But for some reason, that fear always seems to win in the end.
I want to think it's because I'm not really confronting it, but I have been for the past few weeks, and it's really, really hard. I always wanted to avoid the concept of "evil" but I have been experiencing something that I cannot label with any other word. It flashes through my mind like a sword in the dark, like the sudden sound of a lightning strike. I want to think it's been the source of all the pain in my life, maybe all of the suffering on earth, and I have a chance now to defeat it forever. I have been telling myself "I don't know what anything really is, I only know how it seems to me at the moment", like in Quantum Psychology. This frame of thought is helping me to think I am a lot more powerful spiritually than I assume I am, and that it is my purpose in this life to realize this.
What we think has a profound effect on our perceived reality. When I am meditating I become fully aware of the impact that the thoughts I am actively creating are having on my surroundings, they are actually one and the same, it just depends on what I am tuned into that creates my reality and its potential. And yet, there is this devil on my shoulder, there is something telling me I must forego exploring creative realms, and it does not seem to be a helpful presence. It seems to be something that is stopping me from transmutation, to keep me enmeshed in a cycle of submissive seeking outside for what I already have. This is my primary reason for quitting my ritual drugs, to realize I have everything I need and that salvation does not come from any outside force. I am hoping this will loosen the grip of the entity that has been attached to me for so long, with all of its masks, all of its deceptions of hope. My idea of salvation is something that one initiates on their own.
So, I will attempt to avoid posting things that no one could possibly care about. Even though this is my blog and no one else's, I find myself a little ashamed of the poor quality of my recent posts. At the time of contemplation or suffering I use this as a forum to vent my emotions, but perhaps it's just not the best idea, and revealing a side of myself I am better off dealing with on my own.
That being said... There is something incredibly strange about what I've been enduring the past couple of weeks. Maybe even this whole year. It holds the general theme of a battle against evil within my own mind, but the strangest part is that I have the impression that winning will result in peace on earth. I feel myself receiving 'keys', magickal thoughtforms which temporarily fend away the encroaching darkness. But as soon as I find these mantras working, events will occur which negate those models for interaction and introduce contexts in which they do not work. This is part of the reason I'm trying not to tell people how I am currently viewing existence, because my viewpoint is changing constantly. In my mind I'm just sketching and erasing, sketching and erasing, but not quite getting a good view of what I'm drawing, or even what it is I'm drawing. I feel like in my mind I'm doing everything I can to tune in to an optimized stream of thought that will allow me to be at peace with my surroundings and to transcend the fear within me. But for some reason, that fear always seems to win in the end.
I want to think it's because I'm not really confronting it, but I have been for the past few weeks, and it's really, really hard. I always wanted to avoid the concept of "evil" but I have been experiencing something that I cannot label with any other word. It flashes through my mind like a sword in the dark, like the sudden sound of a lightning strike. I want to think it's been the source of all the pain in my life, maybe all of the suffering on earth, and I have a chance now to defeat it forever. I have been telling myself "I don't know what anything really is, I only know how it seems to me at the moment", like in Quantum Psychology. This frame of thought is helping me to think I am a lot more powerful spiritually than I assume I am, and that it is my purpose in this life to realize this.
What we think has a profound effect on our perceived reality. When I am meditating I become fully aware of the impact that the thoughts I am actively creating are having on my surroundings, they are actually one and the same, it just depends on what I am tuned into that creates my reality and its potential. And yet, there is this devil on my shoulder, there is something telling me I must forego exploring creative realms, and it does not seem to be a helpful presence. It seems to be something that is stopping me from transmutation, to keep me enmeshed in a cycle of submissive seeking outside for what I already have. This is my primary reason for quitting my ritual drugs, to realize I have everything I need and that salvation does not come from any outside force. I am hoping this will loosen the grip of the entity that has been attached to me for so long, with all of its masks, all of its deceptions of hope. My idea of salvation is something that one initiates on their own.
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