Humor, Heart, and Conflict: Why “X vs. Y” Books Work

If you’re aiming to tackle big topics with simplicity and humor, consider writing an “X vs. Y” book. My most recent book Sticks vs. Stones is one such book.

You might be wondering, what is an “X vs. Y” structure—it’s exactly what it sounds likes—an exploration of two contrasting ideas, characters, or themes. For example, big vs. small, or light vs. dark.

I like this structure because the dichotomy creates immediate conflict and provides a clear structure for the narrative.  The structure allows you to build a narrative where the contrasts are highlighted and the tension between the two forces drives the story forward. At its heart, this format is about duality and when done well, these books show young readers that the world is full of differences, and that’s okay.

Some key elements that make these types of picture books work are humor, heart, and a satisfying resolution.

Let’s dive into four “X vs. Y” mentor texts that do these things really well.

  • Sticks vs. Stones
  • I Like This, You Like That
  • Beach Toys vs. School Supplies
  • The Almost Terrible Playdate

by Rosanne L. Kurstedt & illustrated by Agnes Seccani (Worthy Kids, 2024)

  • Humor (Exaggeration): The humor in Sticks vs. Stones comes from the exaggerated nature of the argument. George and Georgina’s disagreement escalates dramatically, with each trying to one-up the other by building grander and more complex structures. Their escalating “competition” over sticks vs. stones is comically overblown, creating a fun and lighthearted narrative.
  •  Heart (Emotional Relatability): While George and Georgina’s argument is comically exaggerated, the book ultimately reflects the real challenges of resolving conflicts in friendships. The book taps into the intense emotions that come with childhood conflicts—those moments when you feel like you and a friend just can’t see eye to eye. The story shows that even when two friends disagree, it doesn’t have to mean the end of their friendship.
  • Resolution (Satisfying): In Sticks vs. Stones, the resolution comes not from one side “winning,” but from both characters realizing the importance of working together. George and Georgina realize that they don’t have to choose between sticks or stones—they can enjoy both. By embracing the power of and, they learn that working together and valuing each other’s ideas makes their friendship stronger.

by Linda Ashman & illustrated by Eve Coy (Abrams Appleseed, 2022)

  • Humor (Exaggeration): One of the highlights of I Like This, You Like That is its use of exaggerated preferences. The two characters—one who loves peanut butter and the other who prefers jelly—express their feelings with over-the-top enthusiasm. This humor in exaggeration makes the rivalry between the characters more engaging and entertaining.
  • Heart (Emotional Relatability): Though the rivalry in I Like This, You Like That is exaggerated, the emotions behind it are very real. Children often experience strong feelings about their preferences, whether it’s food, toys, or activities. The book taps into this emotional reality, showing how the characters’ differing likes and dislikes stir up genuine frustration, but also a desire to be understood.
  • Resolution (Satisfying): As the story progresses, the two characters realize that their differences don’t need to keep them apart. They find a way to appreciate each other’s differing likes and finally find things that they both like.  

by Mike Ciccotello (Farrar, Straus, & Giroux BYR, 2021)

  • Humor in Exaggeration: One of the standout features of Beach Toys vs. School Supplies is its use of humor through exaggeration. The book introduces a rivalry between beach toys and school supplies, each group led by characters with opposing views. Shovel, representing the beach toys, believes in fun and play, while Ruler, leading the school supplies, values order and structure. The two sides engage in a whimsical, over-the-top competition that builds both tension and excitement. The extreme difference in personalities fuels much of the humor in the story, as each side’s absurdly large ideas and reactions to the challenge make the conflict entertaining, as does the clever word plays.
  • Emotional Relatability (Heart): Even though the characters in Beach Toys vs. School Supplies are objects (toys and supplies), their emotional experiences are very real and relatable. Both Shovel and Ruler experience frustration, pride, and determination—emotions kids often feel when they disagree with someone.
  • Resolution: In the end, it’s the putting aside differences and working together that saves the day. 

by Richard Torrey (Doubleday Books for Young Readers, 2016)

  • Humor in Exaggeration: Torrey’s use of humor in The Almost Terrible Playdate comes from exaggerating the children’s imaginations as they each escalate their ideas of what they want to play. This mock–epic battle, complete with crayon illustrations that show their growing and increasingly elaborate visions, provides a wonderful example of how to inject humor into an X vs. Y conflict.
  • Emotional Relatability (Heart):  Despite the humor, Torrey’s book also taps into the volatile emotions that children experience when their desires conflict with those of others. The frustration, impatience, and stubbornness that children feel when trying to get their way are depicted lightheartedly and therefore accessible.
  • Resolution: In the end, the two children find a way to bridge the gap between their wildly different play ideas, showing the power of imagination and collaboration. The Almost Terrible Playdate offers a meaningful lesson that friends do not have to like the same things to be friends.

Final Thoughts

“X vs. Y” books are a fantastic way to explore big ideas in simple, humorous ways. The four mentor texts featured, demonstrate how authors can tackle big emotions in fun and meaningful ways. Use these books to help structure your own stories. And, remember, while the conflict might be over-the-top, the themes are always grounded in something real and relatable.

From Feedback to Self-Talk: Building a Growth Mindset Daily

As we wrap up this Growth Mindset series, let’s take a moment to reflect on where we’ve been. We’ve explored the powerful influence of self-talk, the importance of feedback, and the ways in which our language—both internal and external—shapes how we view learning, challenges, and ourselves.

At the heart of every post was one essential idea: learning is not a trait—it’s a process. And that process is nurtured every day through the words we use, the strategies we model, and the environments we create.

We began with the language of feedback, learning how shifting from praise to process-focused comments helps learners take ownership of their growth. We uncovered the hidden judgments in everyday phrases—well-meaning words that can unintentionally reinforce a fixed mindset. We offered alternatives that invite students and children to reflect, take ownership, and keep moving forward. We looked at how teachers and parents can model a mindset that embraces effort, mistakes, and perseverance—not as setbacks, but as stepping stone. We then dove into self-talk, the often-unseen dialogue that shapes how we approach difficulty, respond to mistakes, and define success for ourselves.

And while these ideas may seem simple, they’re anything but small. Because whether you’re four or forty, the way you talk to yourself shapes what you believe about yourself.

The truth is, there’s no final destination when it comes to mindset. There’s no checklist, no certificate. Growth mindset is a lifelong practice—a commitment to curiosity, reflection, and persistence.

It’s in how we respond to our students when they say, “I can’t.”
It’s in how we respond to ourselves when we stumble.
It’s in whether we value getting it “right” or sticking with it.

Our goal isn’t to erase doubt or frustration. It’s to help learners (and ourselves) meet those feelings with new language and new possibilities. Words like yet. Statements like “I’m still learning.” Questions like “What else could I try?”

So as we close this series, let’s keep the conversation going.
Choose one idea from this series—just one—and try it out this week. Shift a phrase. Ask a different question. Reflect on your own self-talk. Then notice what changes. Share them here if you like. I’d love to hear about it.

The Importance of Self-Talk in Cultivating a Growth Mindset

Recent posts in this Growth Mindset series have leaned more toward adult learners—though the ideas are relevant to everyone. Today, we’re turning our attention to self-talk and why it matters for learners of all ages.

What is Self-Talk?

Self-talk is the internal dialogue that plays in our minds throughout the day. It can be encouraging or critical, supportive or self-defeating—and it has a profound impact on how we approach challenges, handle setbacks, and persevere through learning. For learners of all ages, the words they say to themselves can either open the door to growth or reinforce a fixed mindset.

Consider the difference between “I can’t do this” and “I can’t do this yet.” As discussed i a previous post, one closes down possibility, while the other creates space for effort, practice, and progress. That single word—yet—can change the trajectory of a learner’s experience. This is why helping children and adults recognize and reshape their self-talk is essential.

Teachers and parents play a key role in modeling this. When adults say things like, “This is hard, but I’m going to keep trying,” or “I made a mistake—now I get to learn from it,” they show that learning is a process, not a performance. And when students begin to echo that language—when they start to reframe frustration as part of learning—they develop the resilience and confidence that a growth mindset fosters.

Whether in the classroom, at home, or in our own heads, let’s remember: what we say to ourselves shapes what we believe about ourselves.

Self-Talk Statements that Promote a Growth Mindset

Below is a collection of self-talk statements that encourage perseverance, autonomy, reflection, and collaboration.

Each statement offers an entry point into growth mindset thinking. Rather than introducing all of these ideas at once, use them thoughtfully and intentionally—based on context and the specific needs of the learner.

Use the following examples to help model and encourage productive self-talk in your classroom, your home, or your own inner dialogue.

Effort/Resilience

  • I need more time to think this through.
  • I am worthy of a challenge.
  • Everyone makes mistakes.
  • Mistakes help me learn.
  • I don’t understand this yet.
  • If I practice I will get better.
  • This is difficult. It might take me some time to understand.
  • This is difficult but I can use it as an opportunity to learn.
  • If something is difficult but I stick with it, my brain will grow and I will learn.
  • This is difficult but I can use what I know to work through it. 
  • With perseverance I will overcome this challenge.

Autonomy

  • I am in control of my learning.
  • What other ways can I approach this?
  • I make choices about how I learn.
  • I can always try again.
  • What else could I try?
  • How can I make this more challenging?

Reflection/Metacognition

  • My choices yesterday helped me stay focused. I’ll try to make the same choices today.
  • That didn’t work. Now what?
  • When I try (insert a strategy) I tend to understand. Maybe I should continue to use that strategy.
  • I’m automatic with that skill now. I’ll try something harder.
  • Am I doing my best? How do I know?

Collaboration

  • I think if we do this together it will help both of us.
  • I think I can learn from you, so can we do this together?
  • I should share my ideas so others can learn from me.
  • I will work with someone who challenges me.
  • I will work with someone who has different strengths so I can learn from him or her.

What kind of self-talk do you have? Let me know in the comments. And reach out to let me know if you try any of these ideas. I’d love to hear how it went.