The Ultimate

Alfie; a funny character, a gigolo and a womanizer that you’d fall in love with despite his character, he flies from one female nest to another, trying to get what he wants from each with special skills and wits, he is not a bad guy though, he loves all his women; each to a certain degree.. or was it?

As I was watching this movie my mind drifted away and I started thinking, how many men I’ve met in my life that did not have a part of Alfie in him? And to my surprise; hardly any! And some stay an Alfie all their lives.

And as the over rated wedding night is a dream comes true for women, so is Alfie to most men. Or to put it in a different phrase; women go primitively into a relationship to get married …..period, while most men would only go for a fling and any sign of commitment drives them away, and the Casanova remains uncommitted until the day he finds himself paying to get just a company of a female, any female, and I have witnessed a few that ended pathetically.

And that thought diverted me to male sex psychology; why is it easy for most men to fall in love with more than one woman while women can’t? So I tried to put myself in their shoes to be able to see the other side of the fence, or better yet wear their shoes, take their rules and apply them to me; a woman.

What if I had dated two or three men separately at the same time? Where no one of them knew about the other, but mind you, it’s not like I’d make out with one and *(&) the other the day after, no, more like when one disappears for some reason or another, there is a replacement and therefore no psychological attachment to any.
And the result; I’m the strongest in all the relationships and nothing can make me commit to any one of them, they all go by my rules.

That paragraph above didn’t sound very comforting, did it? But remember whose shoe I’m having on, so bear with me a bit longer.

As a woman I strive for committing to one, I date one and he’s my main man, but I have to abide by the rule; if I stay with him long enough, I’ll eventually get attached, so what do I need?.. a distraction.

Some might say get more involved in your business or find a hobby or something, but that doesn’t quite work, I need an equal distraction, I need another man, and remember I did not date the first man long enough to be in love or anything, I’m just beginning to get attached.

And so I date another after fabricating a fight with the first. A new face, a new look, new friends and most importantly; a new experience which has its own joy.

And when I really miss the first, by hook or crock, I get him back. But this time I come back stronger because I have guaranteed his replacement in case things did not work between us.

But as I stay longer with him my initial fear of attachment starts to grow again, so I start looking for…..my distraction or a new one.

Hmmmmmm
Could this be the reason behind the pagan that a man is emotionally equipped to have more than one wife and to be able to love them equally while woman can’t?

Could it be that between a handful of women a man dates he cares for all of them to a certain degree but psychologically is attached to one that he subconsciously fears and that’s why he has to keep himself …..distracted?

Does that explain why some happily married men still keep mistresses?

Is that why some other men panic at the first sign of commitment? Is it because they’re more committed mentally than what they want to believe?

Any brainstorming here?