GATOR

a few steps toward the pond
I see a protusion –  water breeched by an Oligocene vision
wide eyed – face carved by rugged millenniums
his view locked & focused onto mine
those pupils narrowed with daggers of possibility
I am quietly humbled knowing
he has the advantages
he could outswim
outbite 
outrun me
could that be a smirk across those gator lips
submerged & shrouded by calm murky water
water that has surely felt the churning turbulence of death
with a mouth that could surgically unzip me
a mouth that could make me scream insanely
   fanatically louder for GOD than religion or sex ever taught
I snapped photo after photo
with my eyes trying to read his intension
he respected our boundary even as I had crossed into his
this becomes a circular non sequitur self argument
this reptile built of prehistoric instincts & fast short distance speed
& jaw muscles of a jackhammer
did I buy the extended warranty for the camera…
Abbe

Catching “The Kraken”

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Apalone Ferox – Soft shelled Turtle

The myth of the Kraken

Twelve months of moon phases have passed
since I began fishing this lake of Lethe,
each day the circadian rhythm suspends
and I am granted 2 hours for fishing
in my Zen dimension.

I stand like a Moses poised over the lake,
commanding with a mighty rod –
I WILL change the dynamics today
by interrupting fish schedules,
all catches to be released
and no ill will between the species.

Even a slow fishing day
does not diminish the essence of clean mind absorption
of taking in the saturation of the lake,
birds coasting overhead,
and even the red belly of Flyglobespan
leaving Sanford and traveling due north to Scotland at 6pm
is only one more pair of beautiful wings over the horizon.

Mysterious forces swirl just beneath the sheath of water
a magnified-mottled softshell skirting the depths
like an armed floating leather shield.
“The Kracken”, I dubbed it –
Avatar with largess guarding over this territory –
turtle of intimidation,
respecting that we both have a purpose here.

I cast my bait away from it,
watching for the hooded head with
two circular orbs revealing its’ position.
Sometimes obvious masses of  bubbles surfaced,
expelled by both ends of it’s reptile alimentary canal.
Cretaceous ‘Kracken’ and its’ ilk
belonging to this planet millions of years prior to man,
still in basic uniform adapting better than most.
The dark waters mysteriously stifle the pattern
of brown and olive
all monochromatic and symbiotic as one unit –
it is the red and white bobber that’s grossly out of place here.

Suddenly two winking eyes
and massive soft plastron breaks the water
neck extending,
attached to a thick body breaching two diverse worlds
of wet and dry.

These are the largest soft shell turtles in the New World,
sea monsters scanning the lakes from their secret aquatic depths,
making the neighbor children squirm and shout
when the swift-pattern shell passes by.
Many times I was startled by it’s sudden appearance
and I did not want to hook it,
did not want its’ hissing and snapping mouth near my
fingers and toes.
This liquid warrior,
soft frigate fighting vigorously for it’s space,
and it was me who was the invader,
the unwelcomed ‘occupier’

On land there is no faster turtle
and in the lake it’s wet lightning,
I continued to see him as more than a simple species
this turtle was the embodiment of MY modern myth,
voiding the edges of reality to become
a leviathan we all feared would latch onto our lines,
chase us down and eat us whole.

Bringing in bream or shiners too slowly was always a risk,
the Kracken sometimes trailed my catch.
This reptile has a nose made for sniffing death and
is quick to nab anything moving erratic,
like wounded fish or even small ducks-
bottoms up!

This day there was an edgy wind
and wide rippling of the lake.
It was late afternoon,
the sun had been sacked by a wall of gray clouds,
the tannin water did not have the clarity of
sunlight illuminating behind it,
preventing my normal aquatic acuity
from reaching its sight into
the water’s most intimate wet spaces.

I cast out and felt the pull-
just from that tug my adrenalin spilled,
I had hooked something large!
Turtles jerk at a hook differently than fish
and suddenly my line was heading out toward the weeds,
but not sharply down as with a hooked bass.

There was a struggle coming,
from a risky looking sky above
and the waves and reptile fighting against me,
I fought with an invisible power upon the line
as it thrust against the pain of impalement
from a new, sharp hook.

I let it have more line hoping maybe it would loosen,
maybe free itself and swim away,
only to reel and find it still fighting-
fighting against the hook,
fighting against domination,
fighting to preserve its’ turtle dignity.

For a while the line stretched taut,
the rod bending in contortions I didn’t think possible
until finally it was exhausted
as I pulled it closer to shore –
tangling through massive thick hydrilla,
water cutting against it slowing its surrender.

I knew his temper would be ill
his mouth tender and injured
and susceptible to infections-
that hook could prove as lethal as a wounding bullet
to both of us,
one stick and the smallest of deadly bacteria
takes precedent over the largest of beings.

We both struggled for control,
the weeds thickened around him,
the rain began beating down,
but I could not abandon the fight-
my line was still jerking.
I jumped down from the sea wall
to the waters sandy shore
anticipating the worst
thinking how using needle nose pliers,
would be like tackling a minotaur with a safety pin.

As I reeled while standing braced on the shore,
rain saturating my every fiber from head to toe,
the massive beast came into view,
but,
it was not the behemoth I had so imagined
the carapace about 2 feet long — not 5 or greater-
as magnified by the mocking water,
it certainly lacked in Karken proportions.
It’s long neck and legs flailing-
a hook swallowed – the line inside the mouth
it bled red – it’s agony and instinct intact.

My Kracken –
myth of the lake,
myth of my mind –
swimming against the storm tide,
struggling against the pain,
bubbles trailing a route to panic-
animal brought down to scale.

I reached out to try and net him,
but he jerked and pulled
there was no restraining
a very mad, agitated turtle.

As I pulled to get it closer to shore,
it’s feet gave one last thrust of traction
breaking the weakened line then lurching down,
the bobber floating up
riding long the choppy waves.
I watched as a torpedo hurled back to the deep
past the weeds,
past the thick walled and banging water,
past the now fractured tale.

I worried my hook would cost Kracken it’s life,
would it bleed to death, infect and rot?
Sadly, I looked at my pole with dangling,
worn 12 lb. test line,
my head down and battered by rain,
I picked up the wet tackle box and left.

The rain yelled at me,
I had clearly violated the tenets of the lake –
lightning forked above my head,
bent branches whipped me hard with water
as I passed beneath them.
The storm screamed and cried and moaned
for it’s loss,
I listened to it’s anger that whole night,
and thought of nothing else except
how it would feel to be hooked and reeled in,
skin pierced and ripped as vessels burst,
I too cried along with the howling storm…

Green and Slimy The turtles Revenge

2779608425_0fcb5a793erewor Photo Credit: Paul Rackman/Abbe edited

These poems are based on the fact I love to fish and feel extremely guilt ridden when I catch anything. I release them, but sometimes I hook a turtle which is worse than hooking a fish. I have written some “Lewis Carrol”, nonsense type poetry devoted to my angst and guilt. And I still fish almost nightly, with those two feelings latched to my side. This is one of my stories from  Tales Beneath the Electric Blanket.

Green and Slimy – Turtles Revenge

Green and Slimy,
the turtles wobbled up from the lake,
dripping a trail of seaweed in the letters S O S behind them.
Arms locked, tails sharpened,
hurling canasta cards and dice,
Down with the human” the turtles shouted in unison,
disguising their voices using a pig Latin oink,
which seemed quite odd seeing as they wore
the pinstripe suits of white collar terrapins.

There were eight in all–
more than the fingers on one hand,
more than the toes on a Hemingway cat.
Large, small, long snouts, wide mouths, accusing eyes.
A cadence of edgy anger as they marched
like militants with shields on their backs
up to my back door.

The largest of the group gripped my arm with a savage intensity
demanding I surrender my devices and potions.
Leaning back on a carapace paved with algae, he spoke,
We have come”, he said with pupils blacker and meaner than octopus ink,
To remove from you the things that fault your human character.”
to which I said nothing afraid perjury might froth from my lips.
You see,” he took my head into his long, manicured claws
forcing my eyes to look upon the hoards chanting in Hebrew, or maybe Farsi?
Neither of which I spoke, but somehow understood by the captions
magically circling the words above their craggy heads.
You see,” he continued,  “how you have complicated our lives?”
I looked up his nostrils and two yellow snails winked at me.
Whatever do you mean?” I asked.
He grabbed my fishing poles and broke them in half.
Those are responsible for this,”
he turned a curvy profile to show me a hole in his cheek plugged with
old, chewed up Bazooka gum.

Oh my,” I said as remorse trickled from my mouth like melted butter.
Our blood is upon your hands,” and each turtle smacked a wet, red clawprint across my cheek.
I never intended my hooks for you.” I stated.
He shook his wrinkled head, “It is not so much the hooks
as it is about the alchemy of white flour,
“Your human food has created an obesity crisis among the turtles. ”
I took notice that each protesting reptile was pot bellied
.
You bait the hook with soft, white puffs and expect only dumb fish,
but your magic food has all of us fighting and longing for more.

Every one of their heads nodded in choreographed agreement.
Not only have you made us fight each other for the bait,
the methane structure of the lake is different now
,”
They all turned and lifted their tails,
a grueling chorus commenced sounding of hunters blowing duck calls.
Massive green bubbles emerged and burst mid-air
reeking of broccoli and seaweed with a touch of feculent fish.

I put one hand across my nose and the other to shield my eyes.
I am truly sorry for this,” I apologized.
Keep your white flour and hooks for your own twisted politics, maam, I
assure you, we do not share the same fetishes and fantasies
.”
He signaled to the others by tapping his plastron
then kicked the remains of my fishing rods out of his way.
The others followed him back into the lake
leaving behind seaweed,
and the distinct smell of a German restaurant
while a swastika remained stamped into the grass where they had goose-stepped.

I took my bread and tackle box
and threw it all into the trash,
then went inside.
No more bribing the fish at the lake,
No more barbs through cheeks,
they were right, the pure ecology of lake creatures
was being corrupted by me,
toxic white flour and curved steel.

I picked up the broken pieces of rods
and walked back to the trash.
A single, red-eared cooter emerged from a downed can.
He was shoving what remained of the loaf of bread into his plastron.
We looked at each other with vague acknowledgment,
I turned to leave and he cleared his throat,
I’m sorry to bother, but would you happen to have
any mayo and lettuce to go
?” He inquired.
I ignored his question and walked back inside the house,
I had created a generation of reptilian carb addicts
all because I enjoyed fishing.

No longer can I tolerate the smell of cooking broccoli…

Night At Sea

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Night At Sea

Night approaches starboard from the east
porous and liquid as the sea below
they merge embraced like engaging lovers
swaying gently in their exchange of rapture

The thrust of the boat
carves white slits into the wave-veins
they bleed through the heart of the water
vessel upon vessel

The world looking neither flat nor round
but ‘catacombed’ in between
the chemical flux of hydrogen and oxygen and
I, mere mortal, lost in the balance
at the mercy of esoteric nature
on a sea-faring man made invention

Watching the world through a veil
of hazy ink blotting up time and destination –
Galileos’s stars the only lucid oracle
mesmerized by the cradled rhythm
from the parting labial waters –
I close my eyes as the engine chants
a droning diesel mantra

Salinity aerates through the resolute wind –
my skin glistens like that of a neophytes
wet and thick with the juices of rebirth
bonding me to our great Matriarch
and gravity, the physical umbilicus
chains my body while
all vagary of thought ruffles leeward

How grand it is to feast
upon this epicurean night
tacking along an aqueous avenue
turning a blind eye to convention
fed by the unfurling of winds,
Mariner of this liquid cosmos
sovereign at the helm of Neptune’s meridians…

In Memory of the Children of Andrea Yates

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Dedicated To the Children Of Andrea Yates 2001

She stands for a long time
as if gravity is concrete –
staring through lost, glassy eyes
sheets lay limp as exhausted sails
a testament to the surrendering of wills

Long dampened strands of hair
stick to her face
she looks out toward the water
watching for them to come home
when the children arrive next time
they will be aglow with smiles,
full of hugs and celebration –
a house finally resounding with life

For now the baptism abounds
She sees them reflected
from beneath an aqueous mirror
so small  – so white – so still
faces now calm after the tempest,
reality finds her drenched and disheveled
she is exorcised, stoically calm
a rock hard silence deafens the ears
the heaving of her chest
is the only physical sensation she feels
there are no more waves left churning the water
no more shrieks – nor children’s hands violently
slashing through the wetness
to grip onto something solid

The bathroom light becomes a blinding sunlight mockery
her eyes hollow of vision
her heart emptied of soul
how did it come to this
why did Rusty ignore storm warnings
why let her captain a ship
ferrying the devil with a mutinous mission-

Those babies were conceived in liquid
held sacred in her ‘Quiverfull’ womb
and back to the water she has led them
back to the water by her capsized emotions
emotions that left her more than once submerged in
zones of sterilized and sedated padding
enabling her to float just slightly above the madness
till now

For everyday it will come back to her
heavy as an iron anchor
they can condemn her
they can sentence her
it doesn’t matter
from now on she is tethered to memory
The Valedictorian lives behind bars
pills keeping the demons tamed
as she goes through this life
spitting out words from her Bosch-womb/brain
recanting that her children’s fates were sealed
because their mother was deemed evil

Andrea now lives in metered purgatory,
every time she touches or hears water
she feels that tinge of suffocation
she feels her pulse rise as theirs was silenced
she too drowns inside
for vision cannot be obliterated
by a simple drawing of the lids,
she will always see them
their mouth’s last bubbles rising as muted screams
those five beautiful faces looking up
innocent, wide eyes full of panic
they will always stare back at their mother
out of breath
out of time,
silently pleading
silently pleading…

Abbe 2001