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Goodbye to Our Yurt in the Redwoods: Lessons from the Fire

Although the memories of what was lost to the fires can at times bring moments of sadness, the sweetness of all that is most important in our lives remains untouched and in stark contrast to what at first seemed so dark and unfathomable!

Patty and I are grateful for all the love and support that you’ve showered us with…grateful for the “lifeline” that you’ve been for us during these difficult times!

If we’ve learned anything from the fires, it is not so much about what it had taken away, but in what it revealed to us about the heart and human spirit!

To see our beautiful yurt and material possessions reduced to rubble and ash initially brought up feelings of shock, sadness and uncertainty. But in witnessing the devastating losses suffered by so many families in the larger community, it allowed us to see the connectivity of hearts moving together in the common bonds of grief and loss…and their ultimate transcendence to love and compassion! People helping people during times of greatest need!

We send our love and prayers to the many families who have lost so much to the fires and who have children and animals in their care! We also give thanks to the firefighters and first responders who risked their lives and saved countless homes from being destroyed!

When driving in and around our neighborhood, it touched our hearts to see the many hand-made signs on the streets and highways giving thanks to the brave firefighters! The CZU August Lightning Fire Complex is now 100% contained! Yay! Whew! and Thank God!

It has been over a month since our evacuation saga began and the magnitude of all that we need to do in the months and years ahead can be daunting, but Patty and I shall not forget your love and support and will forever remember the lessons that we’ve learned from fire…that it’s power is not so much in its capacity to destroy and devastate, but rather in what it reveals to us about the heart and the resilient human spirit!

Including here photos taken by those in the Boulder Creek Community.

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Goodbye to Our Yurt in the Redwoods

This post will be a departure from the kind of article I usually write.

My wife, Patty and I were forced to evacuate our home in the Redwoods on the evening of August 18 after hearing someone shouting through a megaphone from a helicopter circling over our home to “Leave immediately!”

A couple of days earlier, Northern California experienced a most unusual thunderstorm that produced close to 11,000 bolts of lightning, which then caused hundreds of fires.

At the time (it was still dark), Patty and I sat outside on the porch to enjoy the light show that lit up the skies. Little did we know of the impending danger that would build into what we now know of as the CZU August Lightning Complex Fires!

As smoke started to fill the air, we packed our cars quickly with essential items and drove down the mountain to safety.

Unfortunately, we received notice nine days later that our beloved home was destroyed by the fires. Many of our neighbors also lost their homes. According to CalFire, 925 homes have been lost to date.

Up until that point of getting the dreaded news, we understood the very real possibility of our place being destroyed, but we held onto hope and prepared ourselves as best we could for either outcomes.

However, when it was confirmed that our home was destroyed in the fires, it was like getting kicked in the gut! I had to read the message many times, as it seemed that my body and mind needed time to “catch up” with the enormity of what I was reading.

After much support of family and friends, the initial shock of losing our home shifted into feelings of gratitude for the outpouring of love that was being showered upon us.

In our rush to evacuate, I made sure to pack my singing bowls and other sound healing instruments. However, because of the large size of my guitar and digeridoo, I was not able to pack them and so they were lost to the fires.

By strange “coincidence” it just so happened that we received the unfortunate news the evening before my birthday, so Patty took me out the next day to buy me a new guitar! Ha! Patty was not going to let the loss of our home get in the way of celebrating my bday!

Later that evening my relatives, who lovingly opened their home to us, gave me a birthday dinner as a way to celebrate “New Beginnings.”

It felt kind of surreal, but I must say it was the best birthday party I had ever experienced! And up until the fires, Patty and I have both agreed that this had been by far the best summer of our lives! We called it our “Summer of Love!”

Ironically, due to the Covid shutdown, we had a chance to spend most of our waking hours sitting quietly beneath the beautiful Redwoods and walking the trails close by.

We created altars upon the land and offered prayers and offerings to the Divine Spirit, so strongly felt!

And that is how Patty and I are approaching this period of our lives. Although it was deeply sad to lose our home and most of our belongings, there has also been a kind of undercurrent of something new that is wanting to be born in our lives.

Patty and I are taking things one day at a time and planning next steps, listening and feeling deeply as we move forward on the path that unfolds before us.

We are deeply grateful to our friend, Amy Martin, for putting together a GoFundMe campaign to help raise funds for us to rebuild our lives!

For those who are able to we would deeply appreciate donations and/or sharing of our GoFundMe campaign to your community of friends. Will include the link here:
gf.me/u/yv2xi4

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Kundalini Hum of Creation, Part II

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What is meant by the “Hum of Creation?”

As you continue your approach of tuning into finer and more subtle sensations within, you will begin to experience vibrations/sensations that are vastly different from those that you have been familiar with and “taken for granted.” In other words, because we have not allowed ourselves to feel deeply and to follow the trail of sensations to their very Source, we’ve cut ourselves off from subtle vibratory realms that have always been available to us.

The approach and idea is simple: focus upon and follow sensations to their point of subtlety. And what sensation do we follow? The overall resonance of all that we feel in the moment. You might notice that with this approach the “overall resonance” of feelings resolves to an awareness of its center point…a very subtle bubbling up sensation in the spine, or central core of the body.

There may also be an extremely fine awareness of a background/underground vibration/sensation/rumbling/resonance/radiance that seems to serve as a kind of support strata or “screen” upon which our experience of subtlety bubbles up from.

This background screen can be apprehended by the ego (our sense of self), but there is also a sense (intuited) of the wider “Observer” that is impersonal.

The little self seems to play on the surface of the wider, more expansive, unlimited “Self.”

The background resonance, when tuned into begins to “bleed” through into our familiar day-to-day awareness, and its subtle (but powerful) vibration affects the body/mind/psyche by an intense infusion of energy.

The body/mind/psyche goes into a swoon/contortion…along with an awareness of the “Impersonal Observer.”

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The Great Alchemist, Love – An Answer for World Peace, Pt II

Although I posted this 10 years ago, I believe it remains timely considering the intense times that seems to be “ramping up.”

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The following post is a response to a comment in an earlier post entitled: “The Great Alchemist, Love – An Answer for World Peace.” (Thanks Vicky! Your deep and thoughtful comments generated some thoughts that I wish to express here). It also addresses some of the issues of fear and freedom as expressed in my post, “Zeitgeist the Movie.”

Yes, the world is at a critical juncture in time: the mass consciousness of people on the planet, along with all the warfare and violence has created incredibly destructive “resonant fields” of anger and hatred. The imbalance created are like vibratory grids that threaten global destruction. Fear, like invisible talons, hold those who succumb to its voice in perpetual paralysis and confusion. We stand like deer in the headlights awaiting the inevitable “hit.”

A million Jesuses, Krishnas, Buddhas and Muhammads can come to earth, but unless we individually release the dense…

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We Are Meant to Dance, Part 4

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For anyone who loves to dance, they usually know what kind of music gets their juices flowing. Their bodies seem to move on their own, in resonance with what they hear and feel!

We are music loving, dance loving creations! When we tune into the fine sensation that is activated inside of us upon listening to our favorite music, a doorway is opened to experience that “Aha! There it is (the ecstatic vibration)!” moment with the Bliss Resonance.

That “Aha!” moment represents a conscious connection with the very fine, microscopic thread of the Bliss sensation that can be pulled and followed to exquisitely deep and luxurious feelings in the body and especially the spine.

In this connection with the Bliss Resonance, the sensation in the body is like the finest silken thread being pulled through the spine. This is the thread that the archetype of “Spider Woman” uses to weave the very fabric of creation! Her needles move at the speed of Now to create all things!

I write these accounts with the hope that—to those of you who have followed this “thread” of “We Are Meant to Dance” thus far, that it may awaken your apprehension of this very fine energetic thread moving through the spine and limbs and that you have the somatic experience of which I speak.

In this experience the body is as a lightning rod so to speak, electrified by the ecstatic current moving through the field of the body. For those who resonate with these words, with the space that I speak from, understand that you are a mere hairbreadth away from that “Aha!” recognition of the sublime Bliss Resonance!

I seek to connect with those who, like me, feel they have been “charged” to hold and ground the Bliss Resonance for Mother Earth. Please contact me if you’d like to experience the ecstatic current in the spine. It is a free session that will be of great benefit for you whether we decide to work together or not.

Contact me here: http://manakastudios.com/contact.html

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Meditation “Practice” Pt 2

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This post is a continuation of my last blog entry. A good friend and reader left insights and comments regarding my last entry that I feel are very important for any spiritual seeker to consider.  The following is from Scott,  (a fellow ex-monk from the same ashram we once lived in) from Skeptics Meditation followed by my response:

Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this topic. Having thought about this myself too, but somewhat differently.

I’d go further than the harms of “mental constructs of meditation”.

How about these unprovable “mental constructs”? Aum or chakras, Third Eyes, or Spinal Currents (kundalini serpents).

Failing to ever know for ourselves whether we really experience these we rely on the gurus, texts, and spiritual traditions which implanted the concepts in our minds in the first place. It’s a perfect recipe (dished up by the teachers) to never trust oneself, one feelings or sensations.

Thanks Scott, for your thoughts and insights. My approach and thinking around the “mental constructs” of Aum, chakras, third eye, etc is this: I have my physical body that is able to feel sensations. I also feel emotions like sadness, joy, anger, etc. I also know that I have what I call the “mind” that wants to make sense of the world. Concepts, such as “Aum” has a very different meaning for me now.

When I sing/tone Aum, I feel for the sensations that go from the back of the throat and ends at the lips. I tone it in a way that vibrates my nasal cavity. This has a particular sensation that feels really good. That “feel good” sensation expands the more I allow myself to feel.

It wasn’t always this way. Chanting Om had no real affect on me, at least not in a deep way. It wasn’t until I started throat singing, gutteral singing that I started to feel in a deeper way. Still, no real big shakes.

One day, for no reason that I can remember, I noticed how sensations had “underlying” sensations, very fine vibrations that I could feel. Not in my imagination, but really feel. This opened the way for me to explore subtle vibrations. In exploring fine vibrations in the body, I also came to feel exquisite “feel good” sensations.

Attributing any special “spiritual” meaning to this visceral experience would just get in the way, as the act of thinking about it seems to cut off the deeply felt “feel good” feelings. I describe this as the “Bliss Resonance.” I use the term “Bliss” because in my experience it is a visceral experience, just as intense as sexual orgasm, just in a different area of the body, higher up in the spine. Ascribing otherworldly, spiritual meaning to the experience is not necessary, but words are required in order to convey the process.

Take the words, “Kundalini serpents” for example. Just words, concepts describing an energetic state of the body/mind…along with a lot of “spiritual connotations” that may or may not be scientifically provable.

For me it would remain just stuff of the imagination, heavy mental baggage if devoid of the somatic feel, the visceral experience of what feels like (to me) a coiling, serpentine movement of vibration/energy in the spine.

Now, to me, there is a very fine and interesting point that can be made here. Inquiring minds might say, “It’s all made up stuff in someone’s imagination! It’s not real. At most, it is just a sensation/vibration/feeling that is exaggerated to be something way more than what it really is. So f***n big deal!” And they would be correct in their assessment. The Kundalini energy is just a vibration, a sensation, a feeling.

Here’s the thing though…and I can only speak from my own experience of the sensation…and that is all anyone really has that can be of real significance: our own experience. From my perspective as an artist, it is as if my palette of paints went from a dozen colors to more than a thousand.

Likewise, it is as if my “palette” of perceived sensations in my body (especially the spine) went from a dozen to over a thousand, with the underlying and significant sensation being that of the Bliss Resonance, an extremely pleasurable and activating vibration that comes with an “Oh my f***n God!” exhortation. In other words, the experience leaves no room for conjecture, “Did I imagine that? Was that real?” Etc. Etc. It is like, if anyone wonders whether or not they had an orgasm or not, they definitely did not! 🙂

Anyway, that’s it for now. Thanks again Scott! Your comments, questions, insights are always welcome here!

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Meditation “Practice”

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I’m familiar—as most people are—with the emotional states of sadness, grief, joy, anger, etc. The wide emotional range of what it means to be human. Take joy for example. If we follow the sensations that move through the body, it seems to trigger a smile response upon our face, which also has a sensation. Now, when tuning into the sensation/vibration of joy in the body, the mind’s attention can easily follow and “attune” to the vibration. It offers a natural way of focusing the mind, relaxing the tight and distracted mind.

The body has the sensitivity to feel deeply and in this sensitivity to vibration, we can learn to use any feeling/sensation to go deeply into the body, to attune the mind—in resonance—with exquisitely fine sensations. What value does this have?

For one thing, it is a natural and simple way of focusing the mind, a way of releasing thought loops of worries and anxieties. Also, when the attention is focused upon sensations in the body, the natural pathway of attention, of mind, seems to be towards finer and more subtle vibration… and it is in this subtlety that the connection to the Bliss Resonance can be established.

I find it interesting that in all my years of meditation “practice,” my attachment (and rigidity) to doing technique “correctly” served as a mental barrier that would ensure my eternal inability to connect with the fine bliss sensations in the spine that the gurus spoke about.

In releasing the mental constructs of meditation and allowing myself to simply feel and follow the inner prompts of sensations, wherever they started (joyful, sad, angry, scary, etc.), I found that all feelings/sensations are connected to a deeply vast resonance that has an ecstatically “feel good” component.

It is a matter of getting past our inner gatekeeper, the thoughts/beliefs/assumptions we have regarding God, spirituality, techniques.

To be continued

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Dominant/Non-dominant Writing/Journaling

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I like the feel of pen in hand, flowing upon a blank sheet of paper wire bound in my journal. I write, draw, doodle, play with words and forms everyday, not so much with intention to create pieces of art, books, blog posts, etc., but rather as a way to move energy in my body/mind.

For me, the purpose of journaling revolves around the connecting with, feeling, luxuriating in the creative life force in the body, experienced as a feeling of wholeness, bliss. The “mechanics” of writing, drawing is just a way to get energy moving…and what gets expressed on paper is a two dimensional representation of a multidimensional inner experience.

My approach to journaling is this: I use pen and ink so there is less likelihood that I would want to erase or edit what has been laid down on the paper. The contrast of black ink on paper seems to also evoke a sense of starkness and simplicity, which has a way of feeding my sensibilities.

I usually begin by writing out a simple question/invocation: “Dear Higher Self, what realms can I explore today?” I write this out with my right (dominant) hand. I then quickly change pen to my non-dominant left hand and write my response, without editing or judging what is expressed. At a certain point, when I feel it is the “right” time to do so, I’ll switch back to my right hand and begin drawing or doodling…again not editing or judging.

During this process I pay particular attention to the overall sensations of the body and whatever thoughts, feelings and emotions come up…without judging. For me, the main benefit that I find in doing this is in getting to that delicate balance point of fine awareness of the Bliss vibration in the spine. The process of writing and drawing then becomes less important, as the mind and body are vibrating in resonance with the wide ocean of the creative field.

This process can be experienced while typing at the computer, but for me the tactile feeling of pen and paper make it easier for me to feel deeply within myself.

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Play and Dance of Sensation

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When listening to music, tune into sensations and observe how the body responds. There might be certain postures and movements that it naturally assumes, along with certain “micro movements” of the spine, fingers, etc. Pay deep attention to the subtle sensations along with any thoughts or emotions that may come up.

Like in the practice of any “technique,” if you approach the above without deeply feeling into the sensations, the mind will begin to quickly wander from its connection with the subtle vibrations.

Tuning into the “Life Force” moving through the spine is like connecting with music. Just as music can hold the body/mind in its resonance, so the Life Force (felt as Bliss) holds the mind/body in its dynamic vibration.

Mind then becomes like fingers of the hand. Just as fingers/hands can hold and grasp whatever it latches onto, so the mind can latch onto feelings, sensations in the body. The mind can hold/embrace such subtlety of vibration in its attention, playing/dancing with sensations that are like micro-threads of finest light being pushed and pulled through the body and brain. The experience of the body is then like a most delicate feather vibrating in a gentle wind!

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The Body as Doorway to Spirit — Connecting with the Spinal Currents

This post describes a way of using the body’s fine sensitivities to connect with subtle energies in the spine. For practitioners of Kriya Yoga or Kundalini Yoga, the following process is one that I have found to be a simple entryway into the spine and spinal currents.

Acrylic on canvas by Bruce Manaka

The use of visualization and mental imagery has great power when integrated somatically with the sensations that arise in the body. For example, when visualizing energy in the spine, it is fairly easy to “feel” the nuances of vibration when the body is allowed to adjust in fine micro-movements to the inner prompts of sensations. In other words, “going with the flow.”

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Any posture will do to help you feel the spinal currents: a slight twist of the spine coupled with deep feeling. The gently held tension builds up the energetic field. As you feel the bubbling sensations that arise, the mind finds an easy focal point upon the energies that seem to grow automatically. With the intensity of focus and the heightening of energy, the change in the frequency range of the body also shifts. As resonance changes, so the mind/consciousness changes, going deeper into the subtle vibratory realms of thoughts and feelings. Meditation then becomes a process of distillation, a refinement of energies, thoughts and sensations into their essences, which then seem to move like a kind of nectar through the bodily field. The experience generates a Bliss response.

Bruce Manaka Art

As you familiarize yourself with this energy, the mind can focus upon any part of the body and feel its connection with the subtle spinal currents. For example, when focusing upon the fine energies in the hands, their movements and mudras become extremely powerful in their capacity to connect with currents in the spine. This is not difficult when we just allow ourselves to feel and luxuriate in the gentle waves of sensations.

Energy (Prana) grows/expands in the bodily field the more we allow ourselves to experience/feel the sensations that arise. The body then helps the energy along by “squeezing” it through the fine channels of the spine. The natural movement of this energy stretches the body upward, elongating the spine as though a powerful magnet lifts the spine and head. A kind of dynamic tension occurs and the balance of tension/relaxation engages as a way to prolong and deepen the Bliss experience.

At a certain point, the body seems to require a shift in posture as a way to release the buildup of energy and as a way to prevent physical exhaustion. The capacity of the body to receive greater and greater “voltage” of this energy increases and the body becomes like a conduit of Divine Energy that expands in resonance with the wider field of “sacred space.” The mind shifts with the heightening of energies…it rises and moves with the radiant waves, with the pulsations of the heaving Ocean of Spirit!

The dance of tension/relaxation that occurs in the field of the body, especially in the spine, becomes a push/pull/squeeze of sensations. Again, this is done with fine micro-movements and ultimately with no discernible movements at all. The mind/body is then experienced as a kind of geometry that is connected intimately with sensations and postures…a pattern of Creation, a radiance of Spirit!

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