Line(s) of the Day #TheOffice (UK)

Posted on February 10, 2025 by alexraphael

Tim: So, when did you come up?
Rachel: Saturday.
Gareth: (still wittering) Ahh, Saturday.
Tim: Was it your mum or your boyfriend, or whatever, drove you?
Rachel: No, my brother came up with me.
Tim: Okay. You got a lot of ties in Swindon or you starting again up here?
Rachel: I’ll be going back weekends.
Tim: Oh right. Okay.
Gareth: Sorry, so have you got a boyfriend or not?

Martin Freeman, Stacey Roca and MacKenzie Crook in the acclaimed and highly influential British sitcom The Office (2000-2005). Its success includes being the first British comedy to win a Golden Globe, being the inspiration for the hugely successful American version, and influencing the tone of shows like Modern Family and Parks and Recreation.

Line(s) of the Day #Extras

Posted on July 3, 2019 by alexraphael

extras barry muffin

Shaun: [to muffin] Hello, you. [Shaun bites into the muffin while it’s still in Darren’s hand]
Andy Millman: Why’s he eating like that?
Darren Lamb: Yeah, why are you eating it like that?
Shaun: Me hands, been cleaning out the toilets, got no gloves.
Andy Millman: You… you shook my hand when you came in.
Shaun: Well that’s politeness innit?

Shaun Richardson, Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant in the acclaimed Extras (2005 – 2007). Telling the story of a struggling actor, the British sitcom was the follow up show by Gervais and Merchant to the phenomenally influential The Office (2001 – 2003).

Line(s) of the Day #GavinAndStacey

Posted on May 29, 2019 by alexraphael

“Don’t get me wrong, but to be honest, at the end of the day, when all’s said and done… do you know what I mean?”

Nessa (Ruth Jones) in the charming British comedy Gavin and Stacey (2008 – 2010). With news that there will be a Christmas special after 9 years, I just had to quote arguably the show’s funniest star.

Line(s) of the Day #OnlyFoolsandHorses

Posted on July 20, 2017 by alexraphael

Boycie: (Through gritted teeth) “Well done, Del. Nicely played. Where did you get those bloody Aces from?”
Del: “Same place you got them Kings. I knew you was cheating, Boycie.”
Boycie: “Oh yeah? How?”
Del: “‘Cos that wasn’t the hand that I dealt you.”

John Challis and David Jason in the much-loved British sitcom Only Fools and Horses (1981 – 2003, 2014). Set in East End Peckham, it tells of a poorly educated but hugely entrepreneurial market trader who dreams of getting rich. You can see other examples of the show’s humour here and here, with some memorable quotes on poker here.

Gr8at: Edmund Blackadder

Posted on May 21, 2016 by alexraphael

Though there was only 24 episodes and the show finished in 1989, Blackadder has never been forgotten and continues to be one of Britain’s most loved sitcoms. As well as its unique take on four different periods within British history, it also featured one of comedy’s most famous anti-heroes, the acerbic Edmund Blackadder. The eight quotes below give a strong insight into his turn of phrase, and you’ll find a bonus example of his scathing wit here.

edmund blackadder

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Line(s) of the Day #OnlyFoolsandHorses

Posted on March 28, 2014 by alexraphael

Del Boy: ‘Look after Rodney for me Del Boy’ she said, ‘Share everything you’ve got with him, try to make him feel normal…’ And that’s what I have done. Half of everything I’ve got…I mean, fair enough, I ain’t got nothing, but half of it’s yours!
Rodney: You’d give me half of everything! You’d nick the hole out of me last polo if I didn’t keep my mouth shut.
Del Boy: That hurts Rodney…That hurts. If I had any kind of wealth I’d give half of it to you like a shot.
Rodney: Yeah? Say you had two Rolls Royces?
Del Boy: Well I’d give one to you wouldn’t I.
Rodney: You’d give me one of your Rolls Royces?
Del Boy: Yeah, course I would. If it was weather like this, I’d give you the one with the sun-shine roof.
Rodney: If you had two million pounds what would you do?
Del Boy: I’d give you a million wouldn’t I.
Rodney: Really?
Del Boy: In cash.
Rodney: What would you do if you had two of them deep sea diver’s watches?
Del Boy: Now you know I’ve got two of them deep sea diver’s watches…Don’t take bloody liberties with me Rodney!