Adventures In Insomnia

On the first night of our expedition into the deepest, darkest jungles of Central America Ohio, I suffered traveler’s sleeplessness.  It wasn’t my idea!  After eight hours of driving, and a warm filling meal at Arby’s, I was asleep by 11:00 PM, while the wife was still watching TV.

At about 1 AM, I came awake enough to know that I was awake.  I thought that I had heard an odd sound outside our exterior door – a high-pitched yipping noise, as from a small animal – someone’s little dog??  I was willing to snuggle back down into the warm, comfy bed, and the embrace of sleep – until some throttle-jockey with a semi-load of gravel, got caught at a red light, up on the highway, and Jake-braked his way down through 4 or 5 gears.  Thuubb….THUUUBBB….THHUUU-BB-BB….THHHUUUBBB-UUBB!!!  Well, I’m awake now.

With the wife now sleeping peacefully, I gently, quietly, crawled out of bed, and put my pants, shirt, and boots back on.  I ensured that I had my wallet and car keys, and softly opened the door.  Outside, I pulled it to, against the magnetic storm-seals, and considered.  If I pull it tight, the lock will CLICK, loudly in a quiet night, and possibly wake the wife.  However, if I just leave it like that, a wind-gust, or a passing person might push it open.

Just as I pull it closed, I realize that my key-card is on the bed-table.  Shit!  Shit!  Shit!  There is no overnight clerk in the lobby.  Perhaps I’ll sleep in the car – a decision for later.  I take the car to the nearby service station, and gas it up at $3.219/gal.  Two days later, I top the tank up again for the drive home, at $3.159.  After missing a turn on the way home, that cost me 100 extra miles, and almost two hours driving, I stopped on Grand Island in New York.  Gotcha price was $3.999/gal, but still cheaper than Canadian gas, just across the border.

Back to my sleepwalking.  I amble out to the cross-street, completely around the closed KFC and back.  I circumnavigate the Wendy’s on the side street, picking up 14 cents off the pavement below the drive-thru window.  The ‘Jerry’ who runs the restaurant in front of the motel, is not the same ‘Jerry’ who runs the used car lot directly behind it.

Beside the restaurant, is a very un-Canadian business.  It’s a fair-sized steel warehouse, surrounded by a 7-foot chain-link fence, topped with barbed wire, with two gates in it, identified as 922 Drive-Thru.  When the gates, and the business, are open, people drive into the warehouse, where soft drinks, beer, wine, cigarettes, vaping products, snuff, chewing tobacco, chopped tobacco leaves, and Ohio State Lottery tickets are brought, and placed in the vehicles.  They then drive through – hence the name – turn, and exit through a side gate.  Y’all got somethin’ like this where you live??

I decide to walk up to the highway, to see who the constant stream of heavy trucks are.  I walk a block or so out, along the paved shoulder, and turn back.  I’m the only one, fool enough to walk out here but, I spot a smooth, lemon-sized stone on the paving, and kick it into the grass.  A few steps further on, I notice another, golf-ball-sized one, and prepare to boot it, when it glints in the moonlight.  When I pick it up, it is an automobile lug-nut

When our hostess drove out to meet us yesterday, I noticed that a lug-nut was missing from one of her front wheels.  When she returns, later in the morning, I jokingly claim that I found her lost nut, and try to install it.  With all the possible diameters and thread pattern combinations – IT FITS!  Now she only needs a wrench to tighten it on.

Meanwhile, back at the motel…. I walk completely around it in the parking lot.  It’s 40 years old, but well-maintained.  I decide to climb to the second-floor balcony and walk around it up there, enjoying the magnificent view, and the now-brisk night air.  😉

As I approach one end, a large white cat runs from me – a feral cat?  Someone’s untethered pet?  It disappears around a corner, and I slowly, quietly, follow.  It’s now at the far corner.  As soon as it sees me, it dashes away again – but not smoothly, slinkily – Hippity-hop, with no tail.  😳  I almost followed Alice’s white rabbit on the second floor.

What woke me up?  Do rabbits make noise?  At 3 AM, I tapped on the door, and the wife reluctantly let me back in.  The next morning, I found the quill from my  Not In My Write Mind post in front of my car, and linked it back to my I Found A Feather post.  It’s a foot long.  Our hostess thought that it might be from a peahen.  Peafowl in Ohio??   I guess anything is possible in Weird Al Yankovic’s Amish Paradise, but I never heard any distinctive peacock calls.  Later, the daughter felt that it might be from a wild turkey. Does either make strange noises at night?  What do you amateur ornithologists think??

Smitty’s Loose Change #14

It’s official, folks!  The grand-daughter-in-law had her second fetal ultrasound scan.  The technician noted the clear presence of a sporran.  This means that the first great-grandchild will be a piper.  Names currently being considered include Garion, Gwyllem, and Rowan/ Rohan/Ronan.

All comments will be forwarded as a poll, and your opinion may influence the child’s given name.  Do you wanna get into a lottery about what the final choice will be?  All entries are $1 US/each.  The winner will receive an online photo of a crisp $20 bill, and a note of heartfelt thanx from my retirement fund.

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If the animals knew that most vegans were Atheists, wouldn’t they prefer to give their lives for the Creator, rather than being exploited by the Godless?
If the hated Atheists are also hated vegans, who eat no meat, just which “Godless” would these sapient animals be exploited into giving their lives for??!

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Recent psychological study shows Atheists’ IQs slightly higher than average
Well, they’re not really smarter than us.   Atheists just have a kind of autism that makes them look like they’re smarter on the tests.

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“Jesus Take The Wheel Day”
I’m not sure if it was started by dumb religious people, or Atheists trying to thin the herd.

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Man buys ‘penis enlarger’. Receives magnifying glass.

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One reason I’ve never pumped drugs into my veins or put a gun in my mouth is because I’m not addicted to applause. I’m not craving the spotlight. I don’t need the audience to love me. My life is guided by principles, not circumstances.

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For a while, I worked with a guy named Ugly.  To be honest, he was a French-Canadian who spelled his name Imbo.  While researching other names, I tore his apart.  Spelling drift showed that it started as Imbeau.

In French, beau means handsome, good looking.  The prefix “IM” indicates a negative, like impossible or immature, so, he was not handsome or not good looking – UGLY!  It’s probably a good thing that I didn’t discover this until years after we both retired.

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The number of local manufacturing jobs is greatly reduced, but there still are some, if you look hard enough.  The son just achieved the triumvirate of working at three of the same plants – though not for the same companies – that I did.

It all started in 1988, when I got him a summer job at my auto-parts plant.  He worked there for almost three months, before returning to high school.  Several years later, he left Community College just in time to find that technological changes and downsizing in the Radio industry had rendered his Broadcast Arts course useless.

He eventually got a job at an injection-molded plastics parts plant.  This was the same building where I had worked as a Purchasing Agent in 1975, when it was a millwrighting/rigging firm.  More recently, COVID 19 got him furloughed from his treasured midnight shift position, when the plant went to day-shift only.

Just when finances began to get a bit tight, his company contacted him and asked if he’d like to work in the warehouse.  Who knew that shipping barbecues to the United States, Sweden, and Israel was an ‘essential industry?’  According to the hen-scratching on the cardboard boxes, the ones going to Israel were Kosher.  Their eventual owners could cook beef or chicken, but not pork ribs.

The building that his company acquired for a warehouse, was the same one where I cut boot and shoe parts for the now-defunct shoe company, before leaving to work at the auto-parts plant.  We have come full circle.

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Is There a Connection Between Atheism and Antifa?
As far as I can tell, Antifa’s uniting trait is that they are anarcho-communists who oppose nationalism.
We know as a matter of historical fact that communism and atheism have been strongly linked.  Might this also be the case with “anarcho-communism?”

As far as I can tell, this Christian Apologist didn’t exactly claim that they are one and the same.  He just used some impressive-sounding buzz-words, and implied the Hell out of into it, and leaves the gullible to assume that it’s true.