Tag Archives: New Years

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A Syne Of Fibbing Friday

Auld slang syne last week: Your interpretations for Pensitivity101, please!

  1. Sling your hook
    This is also known as click-bait.
    A good-looking young blond buys her first small house, and finds a secret door. You won’t believe what’s behind it.
    Do not – I repeat – DO NOT click on the link or you’ll find out what it was like to be Alice.
  2. Here’s mud in your eye
    This could be the result of a New Year’s Eve party. I decided to be safe and walk home, rather than risk driving drunk.  I was doing great, until some damned fool stepped on my hand.
  3. Bun in the oven
    Bun in the oven is the expansion of my abdomen over the holidays.  I can’t even claim that it is Molson Muscle.  It’s just turkey stuffing, stuffing.  I only wish that I could still get the even lower portion of my abdomen to expand like that anymore.  I would prefer a firm, upright French baguette, to a German pumpernickel boule.
  4. Twinkle Toes
    Twinkle Toes is the dance director on the RuPaul Drag Race television program.
  5. Moolah
    Moolah is a Frenchman, saying, “There’s a cow over there.”
    Look at the bunch of cows.
    Not bunch, herd.
    Heard what?
    Herd of cows.
    Sure I’ve heard of cows.
    No, I mean a cow herd.
    What do I care what a cow heard?  I got no secrets from a cow.
  6. Bazillian
    He’s the guy from Rio, who invented that bougainvillea drink.
  7. Airhead
    She’s my ‘Emotional Support Doll’ that I ordered from that special website.  Her body can be filled with warm water, for comfort, support, and a lifelike feel.  😳
  8. Goof off
    I just drove the wife’s brother to the airport, and saw the goof off.  They stayed with us for a week over New Year’s, which was about eight days too long. She’s nice people, but he has to go to the library to borrow IQ points.  He’s figured out the difference between wet and dry, but feels that it’s a fine distinction.
  9. Mickey Mouse
    That’s the code word for the local swingers club.  Do you wanna meet Mickey Mouse, actually means, “Swap yer partners all around.”

    10. Razz
    Razz is the past participle of Oxford’s Word of the Year for 2023 – Rizz.  It’s not a very useful word, ‘cause only Christ is Rizz.

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Flash Fiction #244

PHOTO PROMPT © Na’ama Yehuda

WHERE THERE’S SMOKE

Why can’t we stay up till midnight on New Year’s Eve??  What are they doing?

I don’t know.  Lift me up so that I can see over the counter…. Nuthin’ much, just drinkin’ cola outta glasses, talkin’ and smokin’.

Uncle Bob doesn’t buy his cigarettes at a store.  I think he picks his own tobacco in the woods – he calls it skunk-weed.  What’re they talkin’ about?

Nuthin’ really.  It doesn’t make sense to me, but it must be funny, ‘cause they’re all laughin’ a lot.

I’m gonna have chips and dip and Cheezies for New Year’s when I’m an adult.

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Some adults never grow up.  As Rochelle’s site says, ‘Growing old is inevitable.  Growing up is optional.’  At least these kids were supposed to be in bed, but little mice have big noses.  Celebrate New Year’s any way you want, but stay safe.  Let’s do this again next year.  😀

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If you’d like to have some fun – in a non-smoking household – go to Rochelle’s Addicted to Purple site and use her Wednesday photo as a prompt to write a complete 100 word story.

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Flash Fiction #243

PHOTO PROMPT © Trish Nankivell

IT’S OVER!!

You probably wouldn’t remember
I probably couldn’t forget

The year that shouldn’t have been – but was!

Good-Goodbye 2020!  Don’t let the door hit you on the ass on your way out.  We are looking forward to the arrival of your rich, handsome replacement – 2021.

You’ve had many of us looking for brain-bleach, to erase an annum which took Mister Jeopardy! – Alex Trebek from us, but gave us COVID19, and a petulant ex-president who won’t admit defeat.  We’ll see who Secret Service believes is the real President.  tRump may get some 9MM help moving out.

I forecast a warm, rosy future.

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Click above to hear The Steve Miller Band sing about Jungle Love.
Steve wrote the song about a girl, but the sentiments could easily apply to the present social and political situation.

But lately you live in the jungle
I never see you alone
But we need some definite answers
So I thought I would write you a poem
The question to everyone’s answer
Is usually asked from within
But the patterns of the rain and the truth they contain
Have written my life on your skin
You treat me like I was your ocean
You swim in my blood when it’s warm
My cycles of circular motion
Protect you and keep you from harm
You live in a world of illusion
Where everything’s peaches and cream
We all face a scarlet conclusion
But we spend our time in a dream

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BTW:  The whistles that you hear, like the ones in Jackson Brown’s Loadout/Stay are a language all their own, based on whistles used by shepherds to control their herd-dogs at long distances.  The roadies (and their boss) need to communicate across large arenas and amphitheaters, where voices will not carry.  One short – one long – two short, one long – one long, shrill, sustained screech – these, and a little pointing,  all convey information.

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Go to Rochelle’s Addicted to Purple site and use her Wednesday photo as a prompt to write a complete 100 word story.

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To Post, Or Not To Post

To post or not to post….

It’s New Year’s Eve….
We have friends coming over….
I have food to help prepare….
I’m fighting a nasty head cold….
I have nothing in the bank, ready to publish….

What shall I do??! What shall I do?

procrastinate-no

Thank you to all who have stopped by to read my posts this past year (and all years before).  I hope you’ve had a Merry Christmas, and that you have a Happy and Prosperous New Year.  Drop in again on Monday, and I’ll try to be sober and inspired enough to have something for you.   😀

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2014

Happy New Years, Everyone!

I hope you’ve all had a Merry Christmas.  Now it’s time to celebrate a wonderful New Year.

I wish for each of us, an even better, happier, more productive, more remunerative, year in 2014.

I welcomed the stroke of midnight with a list of snacks and finger food so long that my diet tripped over it, and lay bleeding in the corner.  I toasted the change of calendar pages with a shot of Red Cinnamon Whiskey, and a bottle of Wychwood, Bah Humbug Christmas Beer, just to set the tone for the year.

I received my annual report from WordPress about my year’s posts and stats.  My Ego got so excited that it ran around WHEE-ing, and “accidently” fell on the “publicize” button.  Be careful!  The truth is out there.

2013 was a great blog-year, both reading and writing.  Thank-you to all those whose interesting prose I read, and thanx to all those who visited to read mine, and like, and comment.  Let’s do it again.    🙂

 

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2013 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

A New York City subway train holds 1,200 people. This blog was viewed about 5,200 times in 2013. If it were a NYC subway train, it would take about 4 trips to carry that many people.

Click here to see the complete report.