A Dream of Touch.

I want touch to be common
and of the particular moment.

I want touch to come with a special look from you deep into my eyes.

I want touch to come out of nowhere
and surprise me with its warm connection.

I want you to respond to my touch
to reflect back the love I freely give.

I want to watch the sunlight dance
between our touching hands.

I want to investigate touch;
to start from nothing
test the shortest fingertip contact
feel the electricity of connection
let it grow as we discuss what is happening what we feel, what we imagine
let it end for now, or let it consume us.

I want touch to be a language
both a living conversation
and a silent communicator between us.

I want touch to be a healer,
a joiner, a comfort

I want touch to be excitement
I want touch to be reassurance

And if darkness keeps us from touching
I want us both to understand
and find the words to fill in for touch.

I want you to feel my touch
and for me to feel your touch
like the only link keeping us alive.

I want touch to be a daily reminder
of the wonder of life
and the wonder of us.

Still Lost.

I still feel lost
made a mistake at the beginning of this life
during a critical time
that forever changed me
often it feels as if the struggle has never ended
that the happy times are forever tainted

I still feel lost
there’s a parallel life just out of reach
the one where I am much happier
I can feel it so close
it’s translucent temporal barrier
taunts me

I still feel lost
having strayed even further from myself
trapped in darkness
can’t see, only feel
seeking the light of connection and contact
longing for realness