Trying to make sense of it all
No, trying to survive
for it all seems
A world of confusion
mixed with
Hate, Anger, Despair
At those I think
should be able to help me
but stand, stunned
offering small platitudes
vacuous to me,
And at myself for
failing
at seemingly everything
Everything –
happens for a reason
What have I learnt then?
What am I becoming
that needs this pain,
This self loathing
that seeps through my pores
Pawing at my sanity
Clawing at my flesh
Like a nightmare
where
everything is not quite right
where you will never
ever be comfortable
Because if you did
relax for just a moment
the demons would catch you
and
painfully shredded
you would cease
to have ever existed
You would simply be
the nothingness
that fills the gaps
between everything
that ever really matters.

[ With thanks for the sparks that ignite the fire that melts the world into words that sit upon this page. Tonight my inspirational writing friends are theeverbrokenarrow and Natalie – tonight you made a difference. ]