He is here! Bennett arrived one week late on October 17th, at 8:57pm. He weighed 8lbs 12oz, and was 22 inches long. Here is his story:
I was expecting to be late. All of my babies have come past the estimated due date, my third one, Aurora, coming 9 days past her due date, and she probably would have come even later if my doctor and husband had not insisted on me being induced. My plan this 4th time around was to wait out the baby's arrival until at least 42 weeks, (my midwife would not let me go later than that because of increased risk of still birth). My first two came on their own time, so why wouldn't my other babies come when they are ready? My labor and delivery was really awful with Aurora because of the pitocin, so I was really hoping that Bennett would come on his own without me needing to be induced. When Aurora was being born she had shoulder dystocia-- thankfully she was unharmed and suffered no complications, but because I have had a delivery involving shoulder dystocia, my midwife and consulting doctors were concerned this could happen again.
At my 40 week appointment, on Friday, October 10th, my due date, I was dilated between a 2 and 3, and my cervix was soft. My midwife stripped my membranes and suggested that over the weekend I try taking some castor oil. She gave me a little "recipe" which involved mixing the oil with chocolate milk. She said to take it in the morning and that it would cause diarrhea which would induce labor. She also said that since my cervix was dilated and soft, and I have had babies before that conditions were good for the castor oil to work. I wasn't sure I wanted to drink castor oil, but I took the recipe.
Sunday the 12th came, and I really wanted Bennett to come on the 12th (because my birthday is on a 12th), so I woke up and drank the castor oil with the chocolate milk. It was 7:45 in the morning. I actually didn't think it was that horrible tasting. I thought I would be gagging, but it really wasn't that bad. I went back to bed, while my family prepared for going to church. At 8:20, I went to the living room and was going to do my daughters' hair, but I started feeling nauseated. I told Dustin that I needed a bucket, and then I realized I needed to get to a bucket, fast. So I ran to the kitchen and sat down on the floor and Dustin gave me a bucket. Aurora stood in the entry way of the kitchen looking at me with concern, so I turned around so she wouldn't see me, and I threw up in the bucket, all of the chocolate milk and castor oil. I was pretty disappointed that I threw it up, I really wanted the castor oil to work. I went back to bed and everyone else left for church. At 8:50, I got up and went to the bathroom, and discovered that my mucous plug had come out. I was really excited about this because when I lost my plug with the first two pregnancies I had begun contractions and delivered a baby within a day. So I texted Dustin and told him to come home and be with me so that I wouldn't go through contractions alone. I took a shower and was just brushing my teeth when I threw up again and Dustin came home just then. I went back to bed and rested for a while. No contractions. Later that day Dustin and I went on a long walk. I felt contractions during the walk, but nothing lasted. The 12th came and went and I was so disappointed. I drank castor oil and it didn't work!
I had another appointment with a midwife (it wasn't my midwife) on Tuesday the 14th. I had my membranes stripped again. She had me do the non-stress test and an ultrasound to measure the baby, that my midwife had wanted me to have done. They estimated that Bennett was about 9lbs. I wasn't worried, or surprised by his size. I left the office with plans to return on Friday the 17th to see my midwife.
The next day, I was out shopping with my mom and Aurora. We were at JoAnne's fabric store and I could feel some good contractions, but they didn't last. We were just about to leave the fabric store when I got a call from the midwife I had seen the day before. She expressed her concern that the baby was pretty big and I had a history of shoulder dystocia so I should consider being induced over the weekend. She mentioned that she had talked with a couple of doctors about my case and that they were all surprised that I hadn't been induced at 39 weeks or at the latest, my due date. I asked her if she had spoken with Katie, my midwife, and she said that she hadn't yet. I told her I would talk with my husband and call her back and let her know what we decided. Now I was starting to worry. Dustin and I discussed my being induced soon. The next morning I called back the midwife and told her we could schedule my induction, they had Friday the 17th or Monday the 20th. Monday was better for Dustin's classes so we opted for that day. The only available induction time they had for that day was at 8pm, so I took that time. Throughout the day and the next I started regretting that I didn't ask for a Friday induction, especially if there could have been an evening time available.
By Friday morning, I was determined to go to my appointment with my midwife and discuss being induced that day. So I went to my appointment and talked to my midwife and told her all that the other midwife had said, and how I was worried, and that I felt I should get induced that day. I asked if she could start by breaking my water and see where that got me before I began pitocin. Katie didn't seem as worried, but was sympathetic to my concerns. She checked with the hospital to see if I could be induced that day. There were no available induction times that day, but they had two empty rooms just then, so I could go over there and check in. Katie told me to go home and eat lunch and head to the hospital. So I went home, ate lunch, picked up my bags, and then went and picked up Dustin. He would only have to miss teaching one of his classes. I checked in at the hospital at 12:30pm. When the nurse stepped out of the room, I asked Dustin to give me a priesthood blessing. I have asked him to give me a blessing as I begin labor with each of my children. I believe that the blessing is not only a protection for me and the baby, but it is also a great source of comfort to me. I'm grateful that Dustin is able to provide that comfort and protection for me through the priesthood that he holds.
At 2:30pm, my midwife and a doctor came in and broke my water. It is so not fair how saying "she broke my water" seems like the process is not a big deal-- it is not a comfortable situation to be in people. I guess its not a painful thing, but just thinking about it makes me twitch with discomfort. So my water bag broke and fluid gushed and it was all clear and healthy. My midwife told me to go for a walk. So Dustin and I walked around the hospital for an hour. Contractions definitely started coming during that walk. I had to check back into my room after an hour and be monitored for a while. My midwife came back around 4:30 and checked my cervix, I was to a 4, and I was still feeling pretty good. She had me take another 30 minute walk. So Dustin and I walked again, this time contractions were taking my breath away, and I really wanted to stop and catch my breath with each one, but I forced myself to keep walking. After 30 minutes I went back to my room for more monitoring. Around 5:30, I started contemplating an epidural. I was worried it would slow the labor down, and I knew I could handle the contractions for a while longer, but I started worrying that I would get to a point that I would really want that epidural and it would be too late. My midwife asked if I wanted the ball, and I said sure. As soon as she left the room, I knew I wanted the epidural. The nurse, Betty, came back with the ball and I told her that I didn't want the ball, I wanted the epidural. So around 6pm I went through the uncomfortable process of getting an epidural. Within a few minutes I could feel the drugs through my body, and I just felt so relaxed, and so tired. My eyes burned I was so sleepy. I just wanted to sleep. I was able to lay down, but then I could feel the tingly numbness all the way to my shoulders down to my fingers. I've had epidurals with all of my children, but I never felt tingliness above my waste. So the nurse called back the anesthetist and he said it was a normal side effect. After he left, my oxygen monitor kept going off, so then I had to wear the oxygen mask, and the nurse called the anesthetist back again. And again he said it was a normal side effect. Around 7 or 7:30pm my midwife had the nurse start a pitocin drip, she said I would get "just a whiff." And then she had me lay on my right side in a "jack-knife" position. My midwife didn't think the baby would come before midnight. I didn't like the idea of enduring labor that long, even with the epidural. I could feel the pressure of the contractions, but I didn't feel any pain... at least not for a little while. At about 8pm, I started feeling pain during the contractions, but it was bearable, just a disappointment. My friend Rebekeh was going to come and take some photographs of those first moments, so I was trying to time her coming to the hospital just right so that she wouldn't have to wait a long time while I labored. Since my midwife didn't think I would deliver before midnight, I had Dustin send a text to Rebekeh and tell her to come originally at 8:30, but then wait until 9pm. Well, at 8:30pm, the pain of the contractions was intense, and I also was feeling A LOT of pressure in my bottom-- that weird, semi-sense of pooping-- and I knew it was time to push. I had Dustin call for my midwife. She came in with my nurse, checked me, and said I was ready. So my cheerleading team arrived. My midwife wanted a doctor present (Dr. Amy Henriott-- was on call) because of the possible shoulder dystocia, and an extra nurse was called in for the baby. So with Dustin, there was four other women there for me. I laid on my back to begin pushing and thats when I started crying because the pain was so bad. I still had the oxygen mask on too. I had told Katie that when I started crying she would know the pain was real for me. Katie looked at me and gave me a pep talk. I grabbed my legs with help from Dustin holding my left leg and Betty holding my right, and started pushing. It hurt so bad. I don't really know the order of things here on out, but I kept pushing and pushing, I could feel Katie pushing my vulva out- stretching it out around his head, I assume. It was excruciating. I was pushing and the squad of women kept telling me to push, I was grasping for breath and cried out, "I can't!" and they yelled back, "Yes you can! You can do this, Tracy!" And somehow I found the strength to push more. Sometime amidst all of this drama, once his head was out, Dustin told me that the cord was wrapped around his neck once. And I don't know at what point, but I remember Dr. Henriott taking over for Katie, it was a quick motion of Katie stepping out of the way and Dr. Henriott taking over, so it almost looked like, to me, that Katie was shoved out of the way, which I am sure is not what happened. But things were a little scary. (Upon reviewing my delivery with my midwife on Sunday morning, she said, "It was tight."). When Bennett finally made it out, I felt that immediate relief, my goodness there is nothing like that feeling of relief. And then they placed him on my stomach, but he wasn't crying or breathing. They kept rubbing him, and finally after a long moment, he cried. His face was pretty bruised across his forehead and around his eyes, although it was a subtle look, that I barely noticed. Katie said it was probably because he came down so fast. His bassinet at the hospital was labeled with a sticker that said, "My face is bruised" probably so no one would panic and think he was not breathing. When Katie cut the cord she squirted the other nurse in the face with cord blood. (Dustin has no interest in cutting the cord). I was trying to hold him, but I was shaking and couldn't steady my hands so I had them take him and and do his measurements. Dustin followed and took pictures, and was able to hold him first. I continued shaking for about an hour, I realize looking back that my body was actually going through shock. The nurse knew that, of course, and kept bringing me warm blankets. I kept shivering and shaking which just made me more cold. During the delivery I felt everything, it was so painful, but while being stitched up I didn't feel pain, just pressure and tugging of the suture. I had a two degree tear and needed some stitches. I'm not sure what happened with the epidural, its just weird. Finally I was able to hold Bennett. Those first moments as I really held him for the first time were overwhelming and emotional for me. He was beautiful, he was perfect, I had a son. My heart was full. He had light brown hair, and blue eyes. I think his nose was just like Adelynne's was when she was a baby, but otherwise he has all his own looks. I don't really see any other similarities between him and his sisters. As I looked him over for the first time I had to see his hands and feet and all his little boy parts. I had to see that my baby was actually a boy, and he certainly is! Bennett started rooting to nurse, and he nursed really well. After he finished nursing they took him up to the nursery, and they sent me to my recovery room.
Our stay at the hospital went just fine. We had Bennett circumsized and that procedure went fine as well. My nurses were nice. The hospital food was hospital food. For pain management they gave me a bottle of Motrin and said I could take 4 pills every 6 hours. If I wanted something stronger I could ask for it. I took the Motrin when I could, and my pain was manageable. I've delivered each of my 4 babies at 4 different hospitals- even though Amy and Aurora were born in the same city, they were born at different hospitals. My epidural experience with Amy was the best-- even though she was my biggest baby at 9lbs1oz, she was still my easiest and quickest labor and delivery. But the nurses that cared for me in my recovery with Aurora were the kindest most thoughtful nurses. I felt like they were friends, not just medical professionals. When I hemorrhaged 9 days post partum with Aurora and ended up back in the maternity recovery floor, the nurses that cared for me during my initial recovery, came back to visit me when they heard what happened, even though they weren't on shift. I really don't have any complaints with any of my hospital stays. There are differences and similarities, bests and worsts. I'm just grateful for a safe place to deliver my babies and that takes care of us. The worst part of this stay was that because its cold and flu season, no one under 18 is allowed to visit. So my girls couldn't come see Bennett or me. It just made me a little sad that they couldn't be there. We did FaceTime with the girls on Saturday night, but its just not the same. Aurora was pretty sad and started crying when we said goodbye on FaceTime. If I had known I wasn't going to see my girls for two days, I would have said a better goodbye. But thankfully it was only for two days.
We have been home for two weeks now. Bennett seems to have his days and nights straight, so that's been nice. The first week was pretty difficult because Bennett did not have a good latch for nursing. I could not get his mouth open big enough for the right latch. My nipples were blistered and scabby, and nursing was just awful. I was very upset about this because nursing had not been horrible with Aurora or Amy so I did not expect it to be with Bennett. This with the lack of sleep and post partum hormones just made me pretty emotional. But there were still so many wonderful moments of snuggling my sweet newborn and just watching him nurse and sleep and smile in his sleep. My favorite moments are usually when he is on the breast happily eating. This little guy sure loves to eat, and his latch is a little better. He spits up more than any of his sisters did. His big sisters really love him too and want to hold him all of the time. I think they all have adjusted well to a new baby in the house, but they have all definitely been more emotional with the new changes. The first week, Aurora definitely noticed my unavailability. She would really want to sit with me to watch a show, and would stand in the living room looking around for a seat, when I could tell she really just wanted to sit in my lap. But really she has done very well. When we came home, Adelynne and Amy had colds, and since being home, Dustin and my Mom have caught the cold and I think Aurora is starting to catch it now. Its a little annoying to have a newborn and everyone around you is coughing and sneezing. But so far we are surviving. I'm trying to just enjoy every moment I can with my sweet little newborn, because he is just growing so fast. He is already having more awake time and outgrew the newborn size clothes after one week. He weighed 9lbs this past Wednesday October 29th. I look forward to enjoying him as he grows, but this snuggly newborn phase is so short, too short.
