I spotted dear Uncle Elmer out this weekend enjoying himself. The cool Autumn evening was perfect for a romp. He donned his flight jacket and bounded about as the full moon rose.
Elmer’s rather unusual flight jacket.
Tag Archives: silly
Another man reaches the end of his rope.
Good grief. Looks to me like another man has reached the end of his rope.
How to act very weird on a public bus.
Just in case you’d like to act extremely weird on a public bus, here are a few good ideas:
1. Show riders a map of New York and ask them for directions to Lake Michigan.
2. Ride in the front seat and act as a colorful tour guide.
3. Tell nearby riders that you’re Elvis.
4. Grab the nearest pole. Pole dance.
5. After slipping on Groucho Marx glasses, test a few of your new snappy jokes on a captive audience.
6. Duck behind your seat and provide a finger puppet show.
7. Use the hand straps for gymnastics.
8. The aisle is your stage. Be a mime!
9. Flap your arms like a chicken.
10. Tell a random stranger “Good morning.”
Cross this inspirational bridge in the woods.
Here we have another very inspirational image. Once you cross this bridge in the woods, you will find yourself in the woods.
Turn yourself into a strip of crispy bacon.
Lots of people would love to transform themselves into bacon. You, too, can become a strip of crispy bacon!
Another very inspirational message.
I hope you enjoy this very inspirational message.
Tourists attacked by leaping killer whale.
A killer whale was photographed the very moment it leapt from the sparkling blue bay, attacking and devouring eight tourists who were out for a leisurely stroll. This photo was taken one second before the innocent tourists succumbed to their fishy fate.
The crumpled clothes of earlier victims are visible nearby on the grass. Avoid this waterfront park at all costs.
Captain America instructs eager new sidekick.
Captain America’s original sidekick, Bucky, ended up being too much trouble. When young Bucky was brainwashed into becoming the villainous Winter Soldier, Cap missed the good old days. It’s much more fun when you have a happy-go-lucky youngster at your side.
Fortunately, the first Avenger found the perfect new sidekick. His name is Relax, the hip hop hero. In this photograph we see the red-white-and-blue duo clearing a safe path for humanity.
Ten ways to get rid of an annoying house guest.
Here are 10 extremely effective ways to quickly get rid of that annoying house guest:
1. Ask your guest to let you know if they see the escaped python.
2. Tell them to frequently wash their hands because the cat has worms again.
3. Thank them profusely for their help painting the garage tomorrow.
4. Find that old trombone you played in high school.
5. Tell them Aunt Margie with the defective hearing aid is coming over for dinner.
6. When your guest talks about their spouse, laugh at inappropriate moments.
7. Leave that really bizarre sex toy on the guest room nightstand.
8. Tell them Uncle Bob died in that bed.
9. Itching power in the bedsheets.
10. Eat lots of beans.
Amazing biotech miracle: How to grow a new penis!
Recently a human ear was grown on the stomach of a rat using stem cell technology.
Experimental biology has produced many amazing breakthroughs, including the ability to grow complete human organs. In the future, once medical technology reaches a certain level of advancement, humans might never die. Humans might become immortal. When an organ fails, it will be replaced.
This includes the penis.
Just think. Thanks to the advancement of scientific knowledge, when your limp old dick finally wears out (and it will), one day your doctor might be able to order a brand new one.
Like a forever-youthful god, you and your manly appendage will become immortal.
While it’s impossible to know the future precisely, each new penis that you acquire will probably be grown on a lobotomized clone, in a vat of liquid protein, or on a pig.
Genetic techniques might also be developed, greatly altering humans. Like a lizard regrowing its tail, your future self might be able to regrow a new penis. That is, after your useless old schlong is cut off.
It’s actually even possible that you might grow a second or third penis.
You might grow a second penis on your chin, for example. And then you might grow a third penis on your foot.
The future will be full of astonishing miracles!
life is VERY weird 