Tag Archives: God

A letter to my 13-year-old self…

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Hello Blog World! It’s so lovely to be home on my blog. I have been craving to write a blog post for the past few days and just thought, “Hey, I have time now!” and “Yay, I can write a blog entry now.”  How are all of you? I have been busy amidst everything. I haven’t been able to work on manuscript this week at all, which is really disappointing, but I have gotten other things done. A few of the things: finished freelance writing/designing a brochure for a company, finished my first round of editing my writing website, I can’t wait to introduce you all to it! Then on top of that, I have been finding some writing contests to enter. :)

I just thought that maybe I would reminisce on my life and show you all a letter to my 13 year old self. I decided to do this when I saw a writer had posted hers and I remember having written a few through out my college years, but since I am now 24 I think I will write one now. My 7th-grade-year of High School was a tough one for me. I’ve always been a creative person, so I would walk to the beat of my own drum and I really didn’t care what people thought of me. I didn’t want to be like the popular girls and I didn’t want to do stuff like everyone else. So, because of that difference I was targeted for bullying and other things.

Dear 13-year-old Devin,

I sit in another country writing this note. You are only 13. A new teenager. This is going to be a big year for you and also your country. I can only tell you so much right now, but I know you have recently started to go to school at the High School, because the middle school is combined with the High School. You have found this note in your locker when you realized that your best friend throughout 5th and 6th grade has moved away and hadn’t told you that she wouldn’t be coming back. I know you are feeling alone. I know it’s hard to believe that she didn’t tell you. But, I promise that life gets better. You wont always have to be the lone wolf walking down the halls alone. Instead of looking at the ground and shying away from they other kids stares – work your confidence and trust that they aren’t all staring at you and talking about you behind your back. Challenge the kids who make you feel insecure. Stand up tall and smile. Ignore their attempts at making you hurt or cry. Continue to draw and write. There will be a girl you must keep your eyes open for, her name is Silvia Atanassova and she is going to be someone who blesses your life more than you know it. She is going to be an exchange student from Bulgaria. She will inspire you to stretch your limits farther than you thought possible. She will inspire you to travel across the ocean. It may all seem a little scary at this point, because I know you probably feel content at home with Tony, Cassidy and Mom and Dad! Which is fine, and good. You will meet Silvia in the library, make sure you meet her and talk to her when you see her typing in a different language. Befriend her and you will never regret it.
One early morning in September, you will be sitting in your science classroom, when your teacher makes his way to turn on the tv. Within the click of the power button, you are shocked by what you see. An airplane makes it’s way through the first tower of the World Trade Center building in New York. It will be hard to believe. And no, it wasn’t a joke. It was an act of war. I would like to say that your Country has fully healed from that shady attack that happened  11 years ago, but it hasn’t completely yet. I am hoping great things for the future of America and I know that God has a plan. So keep following him. He has something big planned for you in the future. I am still unaware of everything at 24.

Here Silvia, Cassidy (my sister) and I pose in a little row boat thing, I think this picture was taken at a zoo.

Here Silvia, Cassidy and I sit on a couch at my Grandma Doris’ apartment. The little boy is my little cousin Adam. (Isn’t it crazy how you can long for people when you see their pictures and miss them even if they are no longer alive?)

In the pool swimming with Cassidy and Silvia

Here we are standing at the entrance to the Minot Stave Norwegian Church. Isn’t it beautiful?

And to show the other side of my heritage – We are standing under the Swedish Horse.

When Silvia looks for a college to attend in the States, you are going to be really excited, but when she isn’t able to. Stand strong. It’s hard when friends can’t stay.

Here we are with Lief Erickson, the viking.

This is us standing with Silvia and some other friends at the time. (the boy in the green is my brother, Tony) and you recognize Cassidy, Silvia and I. This was the day that Silvia was leaving. We ate out before she left.

You and Silvia both will make a pact to be in each other’s wedding one day. So, you will be so excited to do that. It is one of the hardest days to say good-bye to her,  but you will be set on seeing her again. The day that Silvia got back to Bulgaria she will phone you. The concept of talking to someone so far away on the phone will be unbelievable to you.  Keep in touch with her.

Your Mom will start homeschooling you and your sister and brother. It will give you a huge chance to see more, do more, and reach your dreams. Have faith, because everything will turn out, even when it seems like it wont. Because of the chance to be homeschooled you will get a chance to see the world, learn from history first on and outside of the textbooks. You will meet people and go places that you never thought you would see.

So, I leave you with this final thought. Devin, you are beautiful. Don’t have low self esteem. Let everything vanish. All that pain and hurt from the years of being bullied. You are blessed and beautiful and there is an amazing life out there waiting for you. Love you.

Devin (your 24-year-old self)

Note to readers: When I sat down to write this note, I was totally sent back to that time in my mind. I am so grateful that Silvia came to Minnesota. Yesterday was her birthday – June 8th. She added a light into my life. It was really nice to have a legit friend who loved me. I just thought I would share this with all of you though, In 2010 when I was studying abroad in Australia. I was checking my email and found a letter addressed from Silvia. I was so excited and opened it to find a note from someone else saying that he was Silvia’s English Teacher from High School. He said that Silvia’s Mom wanted him to respond to me. At that moment, I knew it couldn’t be good. Yes, you all have guessed correctly. My best friend from 7th grade had passed away. I broke out into huge tears. It was so hard to hear. She had inspired me and I really was still set on going to Bulgaria to visit her when she got married. But, now that will never happen. I will keep my promise to her though – I will go visit her in Bulgaria and will see her home. It’s always tough when things like this happen. I was so happy that my boyfriend was there to hold me. It was so hard. 

Who? Me. What? Driving on the opposite side of the car and opposite side of the road…throw a stick shift into the picture and what do you get? Lol…. = it was a success… Haha… I am proud of myself!

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I just got done writing a thousand words. I am so happy that I know what is going to happen next in my story. I once interviewed an author and they told me that they love to stop writing each night when they know what they will proceed with the next day. It’s a nice idea to try out next time when you write!! :)

I am going to start working on a surprise for all of you this week. It will be an awesome blogging experience momentum for all of ya! I am excited to offer it to ya all! :)

Today my boyfriend taught me to drive on the left side of the road, right side of the car, and with a stick shift. Let’s just say that, that is a lot to think about coming from driving on the right side of the road, on the left side of a car, and with an automatic. You no longer only have to deal with 2 pedals, but with three pedals and a five geared stick shift and the whole thing with the other side of the car and road thing. I was nervous at first but towards the actually driving without stalling it, it got exciting for me, but I think that Johan enjoyed it even more to give me a driving lesson! And let’s say I only stalled it twice…. And it was on flat ground. So I was proud of myself. It was funny because I drove his mum’s car and it’s a little golden car and one timesee said I could borrow it if I wanted to when in Brisbane and inside I was thinking… Um… No, because I don’t know how to drive a stick shift. But then I said to her one time, ” No, I can’t drive that, Thing. I can drive a bicycle instead!” and from that day and on the little golden nugget of a car has been called and known as the “Thing” by his whole family! Lol… Oh boy…

This week I will start doing a part time job working as an admin for a psychologist. I can’t wait to start! It will be exciting, besides the brain and psychology has always interested me!  That will be fun! :) Then tomorrow I will update you about searching for magazines to send writing into and sending proposals to businesses in the Brisbane area offering my writing and design services. I will also add a tab up above with my services and how you can hire me. My portfolio tab will be edited tomorrow as well! So there are many things to keep your eyes open for! Exciting!

Today was a great day with m boyfriend, Johan! I am so blessed to call him mine! :)

Love ya all,

Devin

…for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough troubles of it’s own…

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You know, I really have never completely understood this verse before today. I mean I always knew that there are issues, things, and battles that we fight every day, but I found out in a much clearer way today with things happening around me. It seems when issues aren’t around, my mind loves to create it’s own problems and then I worry about them… thing is, though… why? Why should I create up things in my mind and worry about them when they are not true?

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is worthy of respect, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if something is excellent or praiseworthy, think about these things. -Philippians 4:8

And the annoying thing is that I know it. ^ But yes, how does one conquer issues that they shouldn’t have to deal with? I think that is the thing with my mind… I’ve always felt that I have had a strange mind because I over think things, hash things around in my mind for like FOREVER and imagine the UN-imaginable. I think being a writer my mind scares me sometimes. Any other writers? Does your mind scare you? or make you worry? But that is something I have to work on with the Lord, I need to trust him and have faith. Two weeks ago at church Johan and I were listening to the sermon and after the sermon the speaker gave us a prophecy, that we must turn and camp… I believe that was a calling to turn from my worries and fears and trust the Lord in my life, relationship, and everything else. In the end of the prophecy he said, “We made a commitment to camp ourselves in the place of God’s favour and God has come through on our behalf. You watch! People will ask you, “How did that happen?” It was God’s doing and it’s marvelous in our eyes!”

So, I am planning on picking a Bible verse to memorise everyday this week and that will help me fill my mind with other things than worry and fear of the future. I have a word and I know that we will make it through everything that God brings us to and through. He is a Righteous God and he has made us Righteous as well!

1. Substitute problem with Bible Verses.
2. Trust the Lord! When a worry comes up push it away!
3. This sort of has to do with #2, you have a choice to worry or not to. So DON’T – Push the worry away and instead focus on above.
4. God is FOR YOU… not against you.

TODAY’S MEMORY VERSE:
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” -Philippians 4:6

He Loves Me… He Loves Me Not… He Loves Me… rendition of FAITH.

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Leave the petals intact. Cherish the blessing.

When you were little, did you ever pull petal’s off of daisies, while saying, “He loves me, he loves me not, he loves me, he loves me not…” (or “she loves me… she loves me not…” if you are a boy reading this!) it isn’t much different for people today with their lives when they are given blessings.

Today I went to a garden with my mom, we took pictures of the last flowers of the season. Because it’s supposed to freeze tonight. I saw a bench in the sun and went to lie down on it. God spoke to me. It went a little like this!

God: Devin do you remember when you were younger and all the little girls and you would pick petals off of flowers while saying, “He Loves me… He loves me not… he loves me…”

Me: Yes, I do…

God: When you had plucked all the petals off, what were you left with?

Me: Nothing! (I opened my eyes in utter astonishment, while looking into the blue sky full of fluffy clouds.)

God: Exactly, Devin. I want you to see it this way. The flower is your blessing, it is something I have given you to make your life richer and more fullfilled, because of Grace. You need to trust me with it and that I will not let it fall apart. Because in my power alone,  it will stay together.  Instead of asking, “What if…” or “why?” or “Are you sure, God?” Because every time you doubt me or fear something that I have total control over, you are picking a petal off of that flower and tossing it to the ground. Totally unaware that if you keep fearing and doubting that all the petals of faith (happiness, joy, contentment) will tumble to the ground, leaving you with just the stem (no joy, happiness and more). Which will make you feel empty. Don’t pluck the petals, my Love. I love you and that is why I chose to bless you with this gift. Don’t give up, waste it, or worry about it. I have it all in my hands. Breath in PEACE.

Devin: (That left me silent and amazed. While, I thought back to my little 5-year-old self sitting on the merry-go-round at school with a flower I had found, as I picked each petal off the stem and let it fall to the ground.

THOUGHTS: Isn’t it amazing how from a young age we are taught to question faith? Santa Clause, the tooth fairy, Disney Tales. We question if something will happen or if we will just lose everything we have. We fear that the worst will happen? And when we fear we are just throwing that faith and trust in God to the ground, which then part of our blessing goes unnoticed. Here we were so consumed by the things that we were concerned with and we totally miss the beauty of our blessing, in front of our eyes.

So how do you go about trusting God? and giving him your petals in trust?

Keep the petals together,

Devin <3

Love you all! :)

Little Blue Monkey in a Brown Monkey’s world -Little planet drifting through the universe; lost

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Today hit me hard… “I felt like a little planet just drifting through the huge universe; lost.” I now know what Ted Dekker was saying about not fitting in, in the world. Also about, when you are writing a piece that you really have a STRONG connection with and you feel like others don’t have that strong of a connection with it. It also makes me think of what the Bible says on this topic:
“I have given them your word and the world has hated them, for they are not of the world any more than I am of the world. 15 My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one. 16 They are not of the world, even as I am not of it. 17 Sanctify them by[d] the truth; your word is truth. 18 As you sent me into the world, I have sent them into the world.” -John 17:14-18

It’s just some days I feel like no one understands me, almost like I really am this “little blue monkey”, that was one amazing thing about the Ragged Edge Writer’s conference. Everyone there was pretty much the same, everyone thought deeply and felt deeply. I wish more people in the world were like that.

I wrote today and figured some more stuff out with my fiction piece. I will share some stuff soon. I was editing the Book Reading videos and they should be up and running soon.

I really miss my boyfriend and really just wish I could have a hug.

Devin <3

Check out my book reading… I read my excerpt… the first one is from the book “New Branch of the Journey”… If you enjoy it, and would like a copy of the book, let me know. It’s available for $25. :)

http://www.youtube.com/user/devinlillianberglund?feature=mhee

Do you feel deeply ?

Book Reading UPDATE! -August 18th-

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Hello Lovely People,

Today I had a book reading for the book, New Branch of the Journey. It was an awesome experience! I will post pictures and videos in the New Branch of the Journey tab above, for you to watch. Mind you it is my first-ever book reading. We had 4 of the writers present. We had a couple that are friends of mine who were celebrating their 26th Wedding Anniversary, and a woman from Twin Valley, named Joan won the SWEEPSTAKES book. It was really a wonderful festivity!!

Earlier today I was busy writing and editing. I got my excerpt ready for my reading! It’s a type of writing that is unlike any of my other story styles – BUT I very much enjoy the characters and story so far!! I will also post the excerpt tomorrow!

I just wanted to update you all, about the reading and my writing as of late!

I will post again soon!

Love,

Devin

P.S. Don’t you just love it when people pray for you? If you could keep me in your prayers, as I will be doing some intense writing tomorrow, my goal is 3,000 words… It almost feels unreachable, but I know I can do it. (I think I will created a prayer needs tab… so you can know what God is up to in my life and what I need prayer for.)

What do you need prayer for?