Talking Movies

December 24, 2023

Any Other Business: Part LXXVIII

As the title suggests, so forth.

Is Westworld the most boring show on TV?

Yes.

The Certitude of Stupidity

I was watching a short clip on YouTube of Keanu Reeves being grilled by Drew Barrymore on the ethics of jumping a queue when it occurred to me that what made his responses so good were that they were slow – you could see him actually thinking about what he was saying and weighing the elements of the Socratic discussion as he went. You do want to give the benefit of the doubt to the line-jumper, but eventually, as he concluded, you have to hedge against the possibility that you’re just being played and then you respond brusquely. How rare it is to actually see someone think like that in public, as opposed to rapid fire answers that are so clearly coin operated that no thought at all can have gone into them. You just pull a lever and you get your prepared zinger. Think Ben Shapiro, Noam Chomsky, Andrew Tate. Brilliant way to win debates, but, after suffering thru Cameron and Johnson as British PMs, surely we can all agree that being able to win a debate does not necessarily equate to anything other than your ability to win a debate. I remember seeing Tate, who as the Atlantic has noted, somehow still echoes thru YouTube in excerpts posted by others, riffing, losing all interest in talking to the woman physically across the table from him, and getting more into the performance of his own persona, as he expounded on how on any given day as a man, because men have such a wide range, he might to have hold a baby and also kill a man. I couldn’t help but instantly think of Seth Rogen at the end of ‘Like a Boss’ muttering about what insanity Andy Samberg had outlined as being his average day.

Photo: John Paul Filo/CBS

The Root of All Charm

I have been watching reruns of both Jonathan Nolan shows this year and so was left musing over the question of why I lap up the know it all awesomeness of Root in Person of Interest but roll my eyes at the know it all invincibility of Maeve in Westworld. Perhaps it’s just that, invincibility. Root suffers. Hugely. Maeve complains endlessly about how she’s been misused, but she can’t die, she’s not human. And Root was never protected by plot armour the way that Maeve, especially as Westworld progressed, so painfully  and aggravatingly was. When she was revealed as a superweapon by Bernard in season 4 I actually groaned that she was back – again. Of course she was. Invincible. But aside from that aspect of the writing, there’s something charmless about Maeve. I cannot imagine Thandie Newton saying ‘Ruh-Roh’ the way that Amy Acker did when she got worrying news from Michael Emerson in season 4. I had goodwill towards Acker from Angel and The Cabin in the Woods when I first saw her in Person of Interest, and afterwards I started watching The Gifted in part because she was in it. By contrast after four seasons of Westworld I watched Reminiscence praying that Lisa Joy wasn’t about to give me Maeve 2.0 with Newton’s hard bitten know it all ex-military PI. I think it is a question of charm. I’ve complained before about the decline in dialogue between Person of Interest and Westworld, and this probably hurts Newton’s chances of coming across as charming in any way, instead of just contemptuous and insufferable. Root by contrast has Shaw complain of her that she flirts at the worst possible moments, endlessly flummoxes poor Lionel, insults Mr Reese continually, and has a very interesting growing bond of mutual respect and affection with Mr Finch; which finally pushes him to let The Machine off the leash and be the righteously avenging God Root always thought she could be. She is a fully fleshed out character with a variety of dynamics with the other characters. Acker’s imposing height lends a weight to Root’s authority, and believability to her ninja assassin skills, but her knowing smile softens everything she says to an ironic game played by humans in the shadow of a machine god: hence in the endless iterations of a scenario the Machine replaces her dialogue with ‘Playful Greeting’, ‘Witty Sign Off’, and the like. Which is why a ruthless killer can come across as, well, charming.

“Problematic”

If you are thinking of catching up with the recent BBC documentary Picasso: The Beauty and the Beast let me warn you off this drinking game. Do not take a shot everytime Louisa Buck says ‘Problematic’. You will die. She says it so many times that it becomes self-parody. As far as I can see the “problem” with Picasso is that he had six major relationships over the course of his 91 years, and many of these women were unhappy afterwards. Uh. … … … So, what has that got to do with his art, exactly? If Walter Sickert really were Jack the Ripper, par Patricia Cornwell, would that invalidate his art? Caravaggio murdered a man, should we put his pictures in storage? Is the only way to avoid censorious judgement by Louisa Buck to leave no trace of your life, like the Sphinx of Delft himself, Vermeer? And why is it ipso facto morally bad for Picasso to have lived with six women over 91 years when Kate Winslet had married three men before 40? Nobody would call for Winslet to be cancelled. Quite the opposite in fact, there was a tremendous backlash against the tabloid columnist who opined that her three children by three different men wasn’t a good look on anyone. What standards of outrage are being applied here, exactly? If it’s nebulous power dynamics, Sam Mendes the Oscar winning film director certainly outranked Winslet. But Titanic star Winslet undoubtedly outranked her assistant director husband Jamie Threapleton, especially, per the Daily Mail, when she moved to New York, forcing him to cross the Atlantic to see his daughter. Picasso was older, richer, and more famous than all but one of the women he was with: unequal power dynamics therefore mean he’s abusive in all connexions he forms with women. Except of course Tinder et al furnish statistical data that shows women choose men who are older, taller, and richer than them. They are actively seeking out unequal power dynamics. So maybe ease up on the castigating of Pablo Picasso. And maybe focus on his Art. Please?

April 10, 2012

The Cabin in the Woods

Five American teenagers travel to a remote cabin in the woods in the South for a debauched weekend; terrible things ensue, and by gad sir is it hysterically funny…

Alpha male Curt (Chris Hemsworth) invites his loose girlfriend Jules (Anna Hutchison) and her sober friend Dana (Kristen Connolly) to join his bookish friend Holden (Jesse Williams) and their mutual stoner friend Marty (Fran Kranz) at his cousin’s vacant cabin in the woods. Once there they unwittingly unleash forces of evil that pick them off by one. The set-up and execution is the stuff of parodic cliché. But then, it is parodic cliché, because the script is by Joss Whedon and Drew Goddard; with the great Goddard making his directorial debut. The sinister blood-stained opening credits are interrupted by coffee-making, and then the mundane office drones sequence that launched is interrupted by the inappropriately sound-tracked title card. This is by far the funniest film I’ve seen in quite some time…

Bradley Whitford and Richard Jenkins play the office drones in the control room of a giant military-industrial operation that Goddard uses to undercut all the horror clichés. They have tremendous comedic chemistry and make this move terrific fun as they organise office gambling pools, snarl at video monitors, indulge in an unbelievably funny speakerphone prank sequence, and humiliate Whedon regulars Amy Acker and Tom Lenk; a harassed chemist and intern respectively. It’s a privilege to see Studio 60’s Whitford again rampaging thru great comedic dialogue, his delivery of lines like “I think, mostly, that I just want this moment to end now” guaranteed to bring the house down. Great lines like “Yeah, I kind of dismembered that guy with a trowel” abound and Kranz, despite his irritating vocal delivery, grabs a lot of them. The true acting revelation though is just how likeable Hemsworth is when he’s not playing Thor.

This is not a scary movie. There’s gore aplenty at the end, but it’s so ridiculous that one setting in particular seems like it was a bet with Piranha 3-D auteur Alexandre Aja on who could use more fake blood. Having read Buffy season 8 I’m inclined to praise Goddard for everything that’s great, especially all the hilarious nonsense with Whitford, Jenkins & Co, and blame Whedon for everything that doesn’t work, namely the final act’s descent into VFX overload and lame mythology. The collision of military science and magic screams Whedon’s disastrous Initiative in Buffy season 4 and the increasingly silly mythic tone is pure Season 8. Goddard meanwhile has always specialised in joyous (and undercutting) comedy preceding incredibly bleak shocks. Here his comedy soars before unveiling the most fitting character death you could hope for.

Sure the ending is deeply unsatisfactory and the whole third act is increasingly preposterous, but this so damn funny that it must be judged an excellent film overall.

4/5

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