
Her Life's Work
She had been persistent for days
instinctually yearning and fighting for her right to exist how she feels she is meant to I never wanted to argue with her
I had no negative intent as I convinced her to move
i even bribed her once
I had finally memorized her name and gained her trust
the next time I saw her she made an unforgettable sound
a shriek so different than even her angriest moments
when i got close enough I saw her being strangled by a four foot snake
inside her coop
and right in front of her nest
protecting her instincts, herself, her..
the snake took his prey into the woods
10 warm eggs exposed for the first time
.. her life’s work.
“extraordinary invisibility”
I’ve made such a comfortable home in the silences between the crashes
i know how to be so silent
so quiet, no intruding even in the room my body exists in
I can make so little known of who I am
i can sit still and say nothing
move no muscles
forget i have them
or bones
a backbone
a spine
a soul
So silent in between the waves you wouldn’t even think you heard me
my chest would rise and fall, but with no visual you might glance, look away, and forget to ever glance back
because there didn’t seem to be anything there the first time
if they saw me, was it so brutal, vile, a hostility with no empathetic capability
no humanic mutuality
no mutual humanity
if they return one day claiming an empty room
will you believe them?
will you ask them what I said?
Will they say “nothing”
will you ask me what they saw
will they report
“an empty void”
“a wasted space”
will they say
“nothing”
“Escalating”
My poems are evolving
a stable deescalation of my methods and religions
i wouldn’t say so much in a crime scene fashion
but it almost appears that way as parts of my own soul splatter all over a page
The experts will appear after the fact and examine my work
declare my purpose beneficial to humanity or against the natural law
I read the fine print, as have they.
why in all of my actions do their stamps of approval always resonate tenfold of my own
no one taught me this brutal art of self-expression, my manifest is still unwritten
my experiences permanent and heavy
immobile like a circle of boulders unable to scatter the rolling hills.
will they wonder how I got here?
why i cant leave,
move on,
subside,
digress.
black ops, but just empty instead of crossed out
there are no warrants shown to demand my thoughts
I haven’t been discovered, condemned, tried
i dont even need to be prompted or triggered
because even though the judges haven’t signed the pages yet, my brain feels warranted in its autonomy
my words my choice
freedom of thoughts, but approval always seems to have a price too high to cover…
of course keep in mind that that does not include gratuity or the price to bring to light what taunts me in the dark
I come with a pen to an untouched possibility
even if i poured my soul in a deep dark stain
would I still leave no trace?
“Believer”
I believed I could see it
but as it turns out, believing isn’t seeing
or maybe she wasn’t seeing anyone right now
double booked, called in sick, on one of her sabbaticals
maybe what she held up as the upmost of faith, regardless of its legitimacy, overwhelmed her as she looked at the path in front of her in that moment
all of the worst case scenarios lined up for role call.
Standing in a brutally strong stance with facial expressions, so confident, so sure.
At attention to detail, but positively the battalion of her own doubts.
so tall someone her size wouldn’t be able to look past the wall of Murphys Law.
So instead of coming to her own table with whatever she could
she gave up her seat, let it all go with 110% effort,
as if to disappoint in full and not over and over again
not repeatedly in the tiny ways she forgot or rain checked or just got too caught up in all of the fault lines of her worn hands
she isn’t a fortune teller, but somehow she is convinced that the future will go along just fine without her,
because today shes keeping the curtains closed
because of her doubt
in her own beliefs
Bio: I have spent my whole life stumbling over jumbled thoughts. As I grow, I feel most connected to myself through my ability to write. The works of artists like Jasmine Mans and Alysia Harris have echoed in my mind for years. I hope to find deeper connections to the world around me through those who are brave enough to do the same. If I am lucky enough to share my words with those who want to read them, I hope their experience takes them further to their own feelings. Poetry may be extremely personal to the author, but the interpretation is profoundly unique to each one of us.









