What have you got to say for yourself?

–

Cursory nursery rhymes

There’s nothing more to be said

We’re mute as the dead

Nothing to say but old saws

Cutting and pasting the same old boat[i]

Nothing new to see here

Old wives’ tales and ancient mariners

Nothing but sea here

Nothing fresh to hear here

Just reciting clichés

Speaking of the devil

Card sharps with idle hands

Shuffle the nonsense and repeat

Hear! Hear! Oyez! Oyez!

Listen – silent –

Same, same, same…

Time, time, time…[ii]

Tock, tock, tock

Nothing new under the moon or the sun

Banging the same old broken drum

The times rhyme –

And we’re in the dock,

we’re under the gun

(Egg jugglers,[iii] water carriers,[iv] terminally ill

turn your wine into vinegar.[v]

But there’s a hole in your head[vi]

That no paper[vii] can fill.)

So Simon[viii] says, put your money where your mouth is

’Cos only money talks

Blather it, lather it, rinse it and repeat…

Hedge your bets

Grow your debts

Grab your slice of pie[ix]

Hide your pirate’s treasure in an off-shore shell[x] game

Sink your money in a superyacht

SAIL AWAY! SALE AHOY! Rock bottom prices! Everything must go!

Sell your soul to the City sinners, coin-tossers, plate-spinners…

(Men of words and not of deeds[xi]…

Your lying IOUs aren’t worth the tissue paper they’re written on.

A rising tide breaks the banks and sinks all ships

Trees fall in the drowned forest[xii] and the birds have flown

‘So long and thanks for all the chips’[xiii])

‘Anchors a-weigh!’ you say

But we’re in dry dock

Up to our ears in hock.

–

There’ll be the devil to pay when these debts come due.

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[i] Neurath’s boat, Ship of Theseus

[ii] Paul Simon, Bookends, ‘Time, time, time, see what’s become of me…’ and ‘Time it was, oh what a time it was…’

[iii] Humpty Dumpty

[iv] Jack and Jill

[v] Jill used vinegar and brown paper to mend Jack’s broken crown.

[vi] Or bucket, dear Liza, dear Liza?

[vii] Commercial ‘paper’ = short-term unsecured promissory notes issued by companies

[viii] See note ii There goes Rhymin’ Simon.

[ix] Simple Simon met a pieman

[x] She sells sea shells on the sea shore – Ren

[xi] A man of words and not of deeds – rhyme which ends ‘and then you’re dead and dead indeed’

[xii] Cod philosophy: does a tree that falls in the forest make a sound if there’s no one to hear it?

[xiii] Douglas Adams