Well my heart is having its own marathon and crash dummy testing going on this morning. I feel like im running 100mph then just hitting a brick wall. The mind over matter strategy is helping, however i am physically exhausted. Trying to work with such condition as a valve prolapse with regurgitation in your heart is a bit challenging. You never know when the wall will appear. Lately it does it quite often. Anywho, today I see the endocrinologist. Fun times dealing with being a diabetic. Great news is my metabolism has went up considerably with a change in eating and workout schedule and it appears it was a very healthy change and maybe just maybe i will get to come off of some of these oh not so fun medications and lower the insulin dose. I am excited for some good change. A breathe of fresh Air to the chaotic insanity that life had become. I am quite frankly just feeling so exhausted that i really just dont have the capacity to process the million feelings and thoughts rolling thru my lovely brain. For once, they will have to wait. I just dont have the energy to think about the turn of lifes events. It is taking all i have to stand and breathe this morning. I really hope to how soon they get this heart issue ironed out. It is a bit taxing. In the meantime, this is my daughters week with her dad and well, it is never easy when she isnt home. That weighs on my mind more than anything. Creating a healthy stable surrounding for her is of my upmost responsibility. She is adjusting to the separate houses as well as can be expected, it just sucks to watch her stress things that no child should. I just dont know…..its all weighing on my mind and well as i said, im just to exhausted to process it all. It is a bit ackward that i look to work as a sanctuary. One that is quite black and white in schedule and duty and allows my mind to focus and rest from the craziness that is my personal life. Well i have rambled on about nothing in general as usual and my head is still going a mile a minute. I hope everyone has a truly blessed day. I will certainly try to make the best of mine!