This Week in Milford

May 30, 2026

Arise, Count Thorpula!

We skip the part where Beth goes home and spills her guts to Gil about Big Momma and cut straight to where Gil confronts Big Momma about it. Little strange that it’s happening at the bridal wear shop instead of a formal wear shop; at least in my experience I’ve never seen the two combined. On top of that, either Gil is on a massive pedestal or the tailor at Deborah’s Bridal must be Lilliputian.

Big Momma’s explanation turned insult is just so much bullshit and Gil knows it. Her little emphasis on affair lets Gil know what she thinks of the whole relationship. Be cool if he follows through with his threat ’cause the less we see of this retconned Big Momma the better.

Finally the old ghoul fiddles with Gil’s, uh, bolo tie? and suddenly he takes on a drastically different appearance – one we’ve only seen before in dream sequences. Yes, it’s the return of Count Thorpula! Maybe he can suck the life out of Big Momma, not unlike how the life has been sucked out of his namesake comic strip.

meta: I half joked about watching ’70s-80s-90s Atlanta Braves baseball when mentioning the passing of Ted Turner and Bobby Cox. I neglected to do it again when Bob Horner recently passed. I spent many an idle afternoon and evening at the Launching Pad watching Horner hit bombs and watching a fanbase grow more sophisticated as they got better at discerning when a ball had the trajectory to clear the fence instead of being just a loud out. Thanks for the memories and rest in peace, Bob.

There’s another passing that’s hit even harder. I spent this past Christmas in Quebec and was hoping to catch a Habs game at the Bell Centre as it’s been a bucket list thing for me, at least since the Forum closed. Missed them by one day as they went on a road trip ’til the end of the year. The whole pregame ceremony where a former player enters the arena carrying le flambeau is just inspiring and really revs up the home crowd. This past Monday, it was Claude Lemieux who got the nod. Not always a beloved player but a respected one and the kind you hated on other teams but loved on yours. He played for several teams and won the Cup with more than one, but it was in Montreal where he got his start. Hearing the news that he took his own life three days later was beyond shocking. Yet another reminder to check in on people; you never know what’s going on in their minds. (edit: It’s been reported that Lemieux’s brain is being donated by his family for CTE research. That his mental state may have been influenced by CTE makes his loss no less shocking and the need for intervention no less critical.)

That’s it from me until June 13. Rob and tdrew will have each other’s backs and help each other out, so play nice with ’em while I’m away. teenchy out.

May 27, 2026

Ugh, just ugh

Let the record show that this was Whigham’s version of Big Momma Thorp. Note that all three panels contain different artwork, whereas today’s strip contains two panels cut/pasted from yesterday’s strip.

Let the record also show that Barajas was writing the strip when this version of Big Momma Thorp made her appearance.

Why, then, the personality change from being somewhat sympathetic to being yet another harpy? What’s that you say? The two aren’t mutually exclusive? Big Momma can be strong and caring and want the best for her boy and, at the same time, think that settling for the first woman who throws herself at him after the ink dries on his divorce papers is not the best for her boy?

That is what’s going on here, isn’t it? This isn’t so much trying to control every aspect of Beth and Gil’s wedding as it is a not so subtle hint that Beth truly doesn’t know Gil as well as she thinks she does – or at least not well enough to marry him. Instead of putting on her Ace Frehley makeup again, Beth needs to grow a pair and tell Big Momma where to step off. That would require character development on her part that has yet to happen.

Since her introduction, Beth has existed solely in terms of Gil. We saw her first as a secret admirer, then a not-so-secret admirer, then a live-in-lover and now a bride-to-be. No friends, no family, no backstory, no personality; Beth is the ultimate Bechdel fail. At least she’s not a complete shrew like Emily/Mimi, Peaches, Dr. Pearl and the updated Big Momma Thorp, or hot to get into Emily/Mimi’s pants like Ericka and Roxy. Why is it so hard for Henry to write a sympathetic female character, or at least one with depth?

So there you have it: your summer plot is Beth ‘n Gil’s Wedding: Will They or Won’t They? Wonder if any news outlets that still run Gil Thorp run it in the sports section.

April 25, 2026

Gil Speaks for All. Gil Speaks for No One.

Between walkouts and their aftermath, Lucas, The One-Man Milford Co-Ed Golf Team, continues to hit the ball. He hits it very well. He hits it so well that it lands on the green. He hits it so well that it lands on the green about 15 feet from the hole. He will have about 15 feet to hit the ball into the hole. He will have a birdie if he hits the ball about 15 feet into the hole with his next shot.

The tension on the golf course is so thick you could cut it with a knife. But not with a butter knife. That would get you expelled from Milford High School. If you don’t think so, just ask Gil Thorp, Milford High School Athletic Director, Head Coach of Everything and Official Mouthpiece of Milford High School. Just ask him. You won’t get a straight answer, but you can ask him anyway.

Ron Jeremy Marty Moon doesn’t like it when faceless lady reporters, lady reporters with frizzy blonde hair and glasses, and the red-headed stepchild of Zippy the Pinhead ask Gil Thorp, Milford High School Athletic Director, Head Coach of Everything and Official Mouthpiece of Milford High School questions. He thinks he should be the only person in Milford that asks Gil Thorp questions. That they get the same non-answers from Gil Thorp that Marty Moon would get from Gil Thorp is of no consolation to Marty Moon.

See Gil Thorp avoid eye contact as he gives his non-answers to the reporters. See Gil Thorp fail to acknowledge that one of the reporters knows the detained student’s name. See Gil Thorp look over the reporters’ heads as he recites the “About” information from the Milford High School webpage. See Dr. Pearl’s hand up Gil Thorp’s ass as she makes Gil Thorp’s lips move. See Dr. Pearl call Gil Thorp into her office on Monday to excoriate him over what he said and did not say to the reporters. See Gil Thorp come away from the exchange unscathed, without any consequences. See whether Gil Thorp’s elder child comes away from her stunt equally unscathed… or not.

April 4, 2026

A lie told often enough becomes the truth… except in a legacy comic strip, where readers have long memories.

Sometimes I hate it when I’m right. This is one of those times. Here we are again in the “lather, rinse, repeat cycle of Milford v. Goshen v. Valley Tech in which all three schools have one person head coaching all the teams and the head coaches of the latter two live only to defeat the coach of the former.” Today Merrill takes the conceit even further, challenging herself to draw Gerads increasingly grotesquely as he sinks deeper into Gil loathing. Pity she couldn’t accept the challenge of drawing a convincing pair of binoculars.

Where I’m stuck here is with this incessant repetition of “Gil is bad at golf.” I’ve been following this strip for a number of years and tbh, I’m not finding where this has been shown to be true. Where we have seen Gil and golf intersect is at the Milford Country Club where, at least during the Rubin Era, he coached the junior program. Here are some highlights:

July 2010: Gil starts coaching the junior program at the MCC, makes kids run laps. Kind of expected for a noob who heretofore has only coached sportsball. https://gilthorp.wordpress.com/2010/07/14/theres-no-running-in-golf/

July 2013: Gil shares coaching duties with Steve Boone during The Summer of Herk the Mauler. https://gilthorp.wordpress.com/2013/07/23/gopher-cam-action/

July 2017: Gil still at it when Jaquan and 8 Arms do their training thing. https://gilthorp.wordpress.com/2017/07/26/the-little-girl-is-just-standing-there-hands-on-her-hips-getting-increasingly-cheesed-at-gil/

July 2021: Gil seems to spend his time at the MCC setting up Heather Burns with a low-paying assistant football coaching job while Carter Hendricks scams people on the links. https://gilthorp.wordpress.com/2021/07/12/break-out-your-jorts/

July 2023: In the Barajas Era, Gil spends his summer coaching the juvie football team. Junior golf no more. https://gilthorp.wordpress.com/2023/07/07/stop-making-sense/

If one of you gentle readers could point me to specific strips in which Gil has been shown to be bad at golf, especially strips that have been published since the inception of TWIM, I will gladly revise the title of my post and revisit its premise. In the meantime I will treat this plot device as so much revisionist history, like the scrubbing of references to slavery from national historic sites.

Monday edit: Faithful TWIMers Downpuppy and (erstwhile TWIM SID) billytheskink as well as my fellow blogger Rob did the work to show us that the “Gil is bad at golf” trope originated in the summer of 2001. In the comments below, and in Rob’s well-researched post today, you’ll see that Gil somehow went 100-90-80-71 over the course of a tournament. It is implied that the tutelage of his then-wife is a factor. All that aside, why then is Gil allowed to coach the juniors every summer for nearly a quarter of a century after that? Did everyone else better than him, including said then-wife, have better things to do?

January 31, 2026

Wonder if the cars have retreads, too

Hey kids, look! Once again Merrill has recycled Whigham’s Fox Used Cars panel from three years ago. This time she didn’t even bother to try to draw over Whig’s line art with scratches. She lifted every damn thing, even the cars and the branches on the trees. Only the people standing behind the cars have changed. Shouldn’t the Chief get credit between the panels for this one, too?

Tiger King Foxy at least is still being drawn like Luke Martinez with a blond bowl cut, though he’s ever fatter than before. He must be living high on the hog selling cut-rate cars every time Goshen wins a game. Funny, it doesn’t look like he’s had much turnover in inventory.

We’re back at Foxy’s for a rite of passage, Peanut getting her first car. Interesting that Gil is the one responsible for making it happen. Since Emily now has an AD job at the now canonically better funded Valley Tech, wouldn’t it make sense that she has some involvement in the process? Of course Em might just take Keri to the Subaru dealer and that might not be Keri’s cup of tea.

What kind of car do we think Keri will end up with? Rumor has it Foxy has a low-mileage Jeep Compass with a rebuilt title that might be just the thing for a sassy Milford athlete. Talk amongst yourselves. teenchy out.

January 10, 2026

“Say hello to my little soon-to-be-ex-girlfriend!”

A double dipper for your Saturday.

January 9, 2026

Previously we’ve seen Emily and Ericka ensconced in a conventional-looking Milford detached single-family dwelling, when not on tour in Priscilla, Queen of the Desert. Now they appear to be in a luxury terraced condo/apartment somewhere in the Greater Milford Metropolitan Area, with an expansive overlook of The Valley. Emily has custody of Jami, a/k/a “The One with My Hair,” for the first time since Gil’s proposal to Beth, and Jami feels compelled to spill the tea on all the deets.* (Wait, weren’t E&E at Borney Pub on New Year’s Eve? Shouldn’t they kinda already know about it?) Jami’s also been retconned into some kind of movie buff; too bad he didn’t have that attribute when Joe Bolek graced the halls of Milford High.

But wait, what’s this? Trouble in WPGLLGBTQ paradise? Seems like Ericka is tired of giving away the milk for free and wants Emily to buy the cow. This is enough to make the otherwise sunny Coach Clover turn into Medusa away and avoid the subject. Fair enough for Ericka to press the question; after all, how much did she give up to move to Milford and how much has she gotten out of the arrangement? Did she bargain for having to vie with a hyper-aggressive not-quite-an-ex-girlfriend for Emily’s attention?

January 10, 2026

Speaking of that hyper-aggressive not-quite-an-ex-girlfriend, she’s now hanging out at Valley Tech games continuing to vie for Emily’s attention. So what does Emily do? Talk about it with Coach Kim, distracting one or both of them from coaching the Lady Techsters. Seems like this is something she should be discussing with, you know, Ericka instead? Is Emily gonna be that great a catch when her inability to focus on her job – or to keep her coaching staff focused on theirs – ends up getting her fired?

We do get a fleeting glimpse of actual sportsballers today, with three Lady Techsters wearing illegal jersey numbers. That reminds me: I saw this comment on the ‘mudegon a couple of days ago (from someone with the screen name “I’m Not Cthulhu, But I Play Him On TV”; YOHB?):

Ever since the new social justice-minded creative team took over at Gil Thorp, it’s become a pastime watching the commentariat at GoComics explode with rage that the strip is not strictly about sports. But if Josh is right, and we’re introducing a theme of competitive marriage, they may…well, actually they’ll be the same assholes they’ve always been, they can’t stand any more sexual diversity than the Luann Trufans.

Not being part of the GoComics commentariat, I’m not sure I’m in a place to, well, comment about that. That said, is it not unreasonable to expect that a strip that purportedly “provides an important link between high school athletics and contemporary social issues” actually link them, rather than using one as a sometimes backdrop to talk about the other? Talk amongst yourselves. teenchy out.

*BTW, is anyone surprised that Beth doesn’t want any kids with Gil? After spending enough time with his two trainwrecks with Emily, she doesn’t want to risk that his seed is the source of any of their attributes.

November 25, 2025

It Might Not Be Hockey, But It Has a Face/Off.

Since we’re in game mode (shocker!) today, let’s do a panel-by-panel breakdown.

P1: “There’ll be no opening coin toss. We’re playing Rock, Paper, Scissors to decide who kicks off and defends which end zone.” Bizarre Cameos Dept.: the part of Coach Babu (or is it Ochoa?) is being played today by Kristen Schaal.

P2: Pronouns matter: “He‘s the father of my children.” Were they your children when they were getting an abortion, Emily? Working through all their other issues? Thought so. Way to reduce the actual involved parent to a mere sperm donor. Adding the Coach Doyle tag as we surprisingly haven’t had one before. Guest Artist Kit Mills draws Doyle less Velma-like than did Whigham; no biggie since this entire strip has become Velma.

P3: Something something old married couples look alike, even if they’re not married anymore. The nightmare fuel none of us were asking for, even if it comes with dialogue ripped from the pages of a Marvel or DC superhero comic.

unseen P4: All the assistant coaches, on both sidelines: “Fine, but don’t drag us into your shit. Y’all should’ve gotten counseling. You might not have saved your marriage, but you might’ve spared hundreds of kids, a few adults, and two high school athletic departments the consequences of your divorce.”

Post title inspo: the poster art for a bad movie starring two hammy actors.

September 24, 2025

My Eyes! The Goggles Do Nothing!

Ugh. Here we go again. How many times is Barajas gonna rehash this backstory? Bigger question: How much of this backstory do the Gordons want broadcast to the general public?

We know Mel introduced Tobe to Gil, and Gil had to inform some higher authority (e.g., the school district, the Valley Conference, the state high school athletic association, the League of Women Voters) about Tobe’s status. Did Tobe subsequently go around Milford High introducing himself and immediately follow that up with “I’m transgender,” like he’s a vegan? Or is that something that would remain unknown except to those who get to know Tobe on a more intimate basis, like the reveal in The Crying Game?

One thing I can’t imagine Tobe or Mel announcing to the public is whether or not Mel had contemplated aborting Tobe. Sure, Tobe could play the Tim Tebow angle but I don’t see that fitting his MO or his level of talent. Nor do I imagine this is the first time Tobe’s heard that story. Otherwise, instead of rolling his eyes at Gil he’d be looking aghast at Mel – and not just because her face and glasses change from one panel to the next.

Post title, of course, inspired by this scene.

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