Facing Elderhood …

18 Aug

My friend and fellow blogger, Jane Fritz recently has written two blog posts with a focus on aging; the changes we face both physically and emotionally as we drift into our twilight years. Since Jane and I are only a heartbeat apart in the census records of that year when we were born, I have been very interested in reading Jane’s blogs to see how she is dealing with a subject we never expected to face, yet here we are. What a surprise it is getting here as fast as we have.

I pretty much have been able to ignore the advancing years as long as I’ve felt good and could ace the annual cognitive tests at my doctor’s office brought to us lovingly by Medicare. Banana, Bench, Sunset! And I can still draw that clock and manage to get the numbers between 12 and 3, 3 and 6, 6 and 9, and 9 and 12 in the proper sequence. To quote a current, annoyingly blustering politician, “If I could do that cognitively perfect memory test,  I’m a stable genius. (Everybody says so).”

My last several birthdays have been significant and have given me pause for reflection. It occurred to me that after a certain age, ALL birthdays become significant simply by virtue of still being here to celebrate them.

Becoming elderly is like walking around in a closet with no windows and searching for the light switch by feeling along the wall. You run into sweaters and garments you should have gotten rid of years before, get tangled up in the bottom half of old coats and stumble over a pile of moldy shoes. There is NO primer to tell us what to expect or where to find the answers. In pre-school and first grade we had the wisdom of Dick and Jane, Sally, Spot and Puff to guide us into becoming kids. Apparently, Dick and Jane … and little Sally … have grown so old by now that they were just too tired to write another “HOW TO” book to guide us into elderhood. They were most likely plodding that mysterious path just ahead us. And Spot and Puff are long since on the other side of the Rainbow Bridge.

You can’t depend on Hallmark. They crank out those lovely greeting cards showing an elderly couple from the back, walking down a beach on a beautiful summer day. Both are wearing wrinkled, comfortable shorts and shirts, canvas hats with floppy brims and they are holding hands as they stroll down that lovely beach into oblivion. What’s REALLY happening is they are holding hands to feel secure and they’re leaning on each other for support ‘cause they’re walking on no less than 3, probably 4 joint replacements with titanium and plastic parts.  Their clothes are baggy because they’re more comfortable and accommodating for their DEPENDS and the floppy hat keeps the sun from blinding them in cataract-laden eyes. And they have no idea where they’re going or why they are where they are. There was no “HOW TO” primer for them either. Maybe being ‘oblivious’ is the best way to stroll down that never-ending, twilight-approaching beach.

I paid a lot of serious attention to what Jane wrote because now I think it’s important that we, of that certain age, share our experiences with each other as well as leaving them for posterity. In effect, while we’re out here floundering and blog-documenting, we are writing an unseen primer of our own, hoping someone will read these specific blogs and that we can help each other as well as the generations hobbling along behind us.

 Where I am now is this: I’ve had 2 major illnesses and one life threatening one and I’ve dealt with them but they were when I was younger. What I seem to be dealing with while balancing on the precipice of what’s next? is just one annoying thing after the other and I wake up many mornings thinking,  “What awful thing is going to happen today?” Unfortunately,  I’m seldom disappointed.

I HAVE found, though, that I’ve become a little more daring now that I’m older and marching forward at a slower pace. Someone asked recently on a science fiction Facebook page, “Would you use a Star Trek transporter knowing it would scatter your atoms and reassemble them on your arrival at your destination? 10 years ago, I might have hesitated. Now I don’t even have to THINK about taking that uncertain trip. I’D DO IT for the experience! What would I have to lose???? A lot less now than 10 years ago.

We try to eat healthy meals, mostly, and get some exercise and Jane and I seem to keep our brain cells clicking along with all thrusters firing by writing stuff and thinking through what we want to write about … and we both have grandchildren. What we also both know is that it’s not healthy, as well as being just plain futile to spend a lot of time worrying about the things we have no control over like aging and politics. Frustrating as we’ve discovered it is, we probably have more control over aging.

So, as I’ve said before, if I wake up in the morning and manage to make it to the bathroom without peeing on my feet, I figure it’s going to be an OK day.

As a parallel for observation (are you listening, Dick and Jane?) we’re caring for and loving our 19.5-year-old cat as she deals with her feline version of facing elderhood. She has pretty severe osteoarthritis and goes to the vet once a month for an injection specifically prescribed for her joint pain. Because of her condition and the fact that there IS no joint replacement surgery for cats, she has difficulty walking and sometimes has problems climbing in and out of the litter box. Sometimes she almost makes it but misses and hits, instead, the absorbent Kitty Pads I have surrounding the  box. Even with that consideration, she is still cat cognitively unimpaired and still has some worthwhile quality of life. I just can’t justify “putting her to sleep” for our convenience.

Comparatively, I hope no one considers putting ME to sleep for the same bladder dysfunction that is plaguing the cat, even though she isn’t peeing on her feet. That would be a very ugly ending for Dick and Jane’s new “HOW TO” book, Facing Elderhood with Dick and Jane (Sally, Spot and Puff ): A Preparation Primer

BLINK! The Raccoon Wars …

13 Jul

My husband and I have had an ADT home security system for 22 years because we’re in a remote area and back when this house was built, we were only the 5th. house in this now thriving subdivision. We’ve added to the system along the way and a little over 2 years ago my husband added Blink outside security cameras all over the place. Not only have people become just plain cruel lately, they have gotten progressively bolder and meaner and the additional security feels, well, more SECURE.

Since adding the outside security system, we haven’t had a break-in intruder but we have seen a lot of local wildlife strolling through the yard at night. There have been herds of deer snacking on our flowering shrubs, rabbits, opossums, raccoons and a cat convention on our porch after sundown almost every night.

Since adding Blink we have a video file of our neighborhood bear checking out our basement door and the door to our basement utility room, our garbage can on the side porch and our front porch furniture. So far, he hasn’t disturbed our garbage like he has some of our neighbors and has done no damage. And we DID find out why the left side of my car is ALWAYS clean and polished in the mornings. Our bear takes the same path every night going to his next stop and his fur cleans off the left side of my car as he passes by it. The bear lanolin apparently gives that side a freshly waxed look. Maybe I should turn the car around every night to get a more even Bear Car Wash.

Way back when BEAR SMITH (we’ve given him our last name for reference purposes only) first showed up we got some cool videos of him walking down our front walkway, I sent them to our local TV news station and they featured our video on NEWS AT 11. Our Willy-installed Blink outside cameras haven’t failed us yet.

Way back at the end of January when snow had turned to ice in our yard, Willy tossed out a couple of 2-week-old biscuits for the birds. Instantly a black cat we’d seen in the neighborhood for months came from nowhere and devoured a biscuit. Being especially fond of cats we knew that they notoriously are not biscuit eaters unless they are pretty hungry. Our neighbors confirmed the little black cat didn’t seem to belong to anyone, was sleeping on different porches at night and scavenging what food he could find or was given. We decided to help by feeding it.

The little black cat was familiar with people but seemed to have been on her own for a while and was really skittish so we began by leaving cat food at the wood pile and gradually moving it closer to the house until we started putting it on the porch. The porch protected the cat from weather and even though we added a box for her to sleep in, she never did. We finally convinced the little hobo that we were only trying to help by providing food and water and were not evil cat abductors selling cat pelts to clothing companies to be used as faux mink coats.

Willy added a CAT CAM to our outside security system above the cat feeding area. When there is motion in front of it the Blink app on Willy’s phone chimes and we can keep up with when our little black hobo comes for a meal. She trusts us enough after 6 months of good cat food, occasional chicken, turkey and tuna leftovers and KFC on Sunday nights to sit on the porch while we put her food on the mat under the CAT CAM. She won’t come close enough to let us touch her … yet … but she waits for us now on the porch to be fed.

Until about a month ago, all had been going well at ‘Smith’s Catville.’ Then in the middle of the night the CAT CAM reported raccoon activity. The HUGE raccoon,  fat and fastidious,  even washed his hands in the cat water before eating the cat food.

We started taking the food inside at night and that solved the problem for a little while. When the fat raccoon realized there was food available during the day it started showing up at all hours, proving that raccoons aren’t just nocturnal.

While the price of eggs has risen to just under the price of a kidney sold on the black market on the Dark Web, a bag of cat food is right up there in that price category. It became way less than cost efficient to feed the cat, plus a couple neighborhood cats that have homes and families, AND what was starting to look like a 400-pound raccoon, obviously the star of that B-movie series, The Raccoon that Devoured Cleveland. And the Cleveland-devouring raccoon had started bringing a smaller, scraggly-looking raccoon with it, most likely a spouse.

I started chasing them one-at-a-time off the porch with a broom and a yell and Willy started doing the same thing. They ran like crazy … at first. Then they started running off the porch but stoppling in the yard and waiting for the “broom squealers” to leave.

Whichever one of us was on Raccoon Patrol started carrying Willy’s phone with us. When the chime alerted us from the CAT CAM that someone was at the cat bowl, we’d check and if it was Mega ‘Coon, we’d pick up the broom and start running and yelling.

The ‘coon that broke the camel’s back, kinda, was the morning he came and the BLINK alerted me on the phone just as I was getting dressed. Wearing only my ‘dainties’ and a pajama top I grabbed the broom and, giving my best Ninja scream, ran onto the porch and into the yard, broom raised over my head. I chased the fat raccoon until he just stopped, turned around and looked at me.  It was like a stand-off at the OK Corral as we both stood frozen waiting for the other to yell, “DRAW!”  With broom raised,  I let fly a bloodcurdling Ninja scream and the racoon took off into the woods at a speed that would have challenged any competitive runner. SCORE ONE for the semi-naked screaming lady and best wishes to my neighbors that surely hightailed it back inside to the safety of their homes.  

I told Willy, as he showed me the embarrassing footage on the Blink security camera chronicling the event, that I believed if I screamed like that again my throat would  bleed.

The fat raccoon didn’t come back for a long time but it did come back one final time (so far). Willy was planning to shoot it with a paintball but I didn’t want to hurt it and paintballs leave terrible bruises on people. There was something about that pitiful look it gave me just before my final throat-ripping scream that gave me mixed feelings about the animal and I started understanding that t was just hungry and doing the best it could. I’m a sucker for a hard luck story.  

Willy DID, however sit on the porch cradling his BB gun one morning following the  return of the raccoon on the CAT CAM. He yelled, it took off and he shot the BB above its head into the trees. The sound of the flying pellet and the obvious noise it made when it hit a nearby tree must have put the fear of the raccoon deity into the soul of that fat fuzzy creature because he hasn’t been back since. We are hopeful.

In case we should mysteriously disappear and seem to have been abducted by aliens, please do tell the authorities that evidence of our disappearance may be found on the videos from our Blink security system. Please, also tell them not to pay too much attention to the crazed, half-naked woman chasing something off the porch with a broom, screaming in tongues or the man cradling a BB gun shooting into the bushes.

Chances are we didn’t get abducted by a band of marauding raccoons but you never know.  If that is what the reliable Blink recorded and we’ve been ‘coonnapped,’  maybe our family can sell the movie rights to Paramount or Disney. And we hope they  DO share the royalties with our grandson. He may need it to escape the paparazzi when they find out his grandparents starred in the latest version of  BLINK! The Raccoon Wars …

For the First Time …

16 Jun

My husband and I are no strangers to protests. We came along at the end of one and slid into another, another and another as kids, adolescents and young adults. As a matter of fact, in my memory it seems there was ALWAYS something being protested against or for … or for AND against. Our youth was filled with the turbulent times of the Vietnam war, equal rights, civil rights and anti-nuclear protests, to name a few. Much like the beginning of space travel and moon landings, perhaps we just became immune to the excitement of it all and accepted protests as simply part of life. Whatever the reason, my husband and I never managed to become impassioned enough to jump into a sign-carrying, drum-beating, marching protest … until now. But here we are … grandparents … finally impassioned strongly … so strongly that last week we spent a good bit of time making signs for the No Kings Protest this past Saturday against our current government’s administration.

As we held our signs high in the 90+ degree heat of Virginia summer and chanted “NO KINGS, NO KINGS” in unison with the other approximately 498 people attending the protest (update: a local police department representative estimated crowd size to be 850 – 1000) I said to my husband, “A year ago we could never have imagined we’d be in the middle of a huge national protest this year.” He shook his head and said to me, “But here we are.”

We’ve never been political people, exactly. We’ve known what values we felt were important for this country and voted accordingly, trusting that both political candidates and political parties, although having differences, had the good of the country as the driving force behind their candidacy, and their oath to the Constitution as their focal point around which to govern; their north star. If our preferred candidate didn’t win an election, we knew pretty much that the country would be in good hands because the majority of its leaders genuinely cared – or it SEEMED that way. The election in 2024 changed all that. We knew a second trump presidency would be bad because we’d seen it during his first term and he told us before the election what he intended to do if elected. We could not have imagined how bad until his inauguration.

I don’t plan to go detail by detail about the frightening changes that began almost immediately after being sworn into office and he removed his hand from the Bible … except he never really placed his hand on the Bible, in case that’s significant. Suffice it to say that the changes have been horrific with some new thing daily in this house of horrors our country has become. If we’re keeping up and making sure we pay attention to ALL news media outlets and not just one, we are aware of those changes and unless we’re deluded, we realize how frightening they have been and continue to be.

And so, there we were, grandparents, at our first protest, primarily because we so hope for a safer, kinder world for our 3-year-old grandson to grow up in and be a contributing, successful member of. It’s amazing just how much that desire has changed us and made us so fully aware.

It was exhilarating to finally be in a big crowd of sign-carrying, chanting people that felt like we do with whom we were sharing our love for this country and our concern for the damage we’re seeing daily to our threatened democracy. We were sharing those fears and concerns, which made them seem less like Stephen King’s monsters in the closet. The atmosphere seemed so reassuring that there IS hope and most things are possible if we share them and work them out together.

As so many protesters decades before us have found out, we were suddenly NOT among strangers … we were sharing an experience with ‘family’ on a hot June afternoon AND also sharing it with the 5 MILLION ‘NO KINGS’ protesters nationally and in other countries who support us.

The main theme of the No Kings Protest was and always is peaceful protest. The organizers stressed that from the beginning and we followed through. If counter protesters came into our space attempting to disrupt our peaceful protest, we were not to engage with them but to sit down and put our signs down in front of us, leaving the disrupters standing and clearly visible to law enforcement.

A number of ZOOM meetings and webinars were available leading up to the day of the nationwide protest on how to conduct ourselves, how to defuse an altercation, what to bring with us to the protest, what NOT to bring, how umbrellas and handles on signs should be left at home rather than bringing anything to the gathering that could be used as a weapon. And NO WEAPONS or firearms should be brought to the event. That was fully enforced during the rally.

It was amazing how well organized it all was for something so large, a nationwide event that extended to other countries.

The crowd consisted of young adults with young families, middle aged people in a position to be caring for elderly parents, grandparents, the disabled and the elderly. We talked to them all and they talked to us. They had brought their concerns with them like weights on their backs – concerns about the environment, healthcare and vaccines, our country’s allies or lack of them, our security and safety, total disruption of vital government programs, tariffs, cost of living, jobs, loss of health insurance for elderly parents and for ourselves, Medicaid, Medicare and Social Security, to just scratch the surface and mention only a few. Our signs reflected specific concerns. All this brought a lessening of anxiety because there is comfort knowing you aren’t the ONLY ones.

Being a part of ‘No Kings’ was a life-altering experience for us because we realized how very much NOT alone we are … and that there is hope.

The defining moment of the protest afternoon for me was the presence of 3 MAGA people, all wearing the red MAGA baseball cap that is the focal point of the costume. All 3 had beards, stern expressions and accusing stares. Two stood on either side of the area, watching, arms crossed and not speaking but surveilling. Because of what the ZOOM meetings and webinars had instilled in us, we found them far less intimidating than they might have seemed otherwise and they were easy to ignore, which everyone did.

About 40 minutes into the event, the third member of the “red hat society’ carrying an unusual flag walked into the center of the crowd, turned around and just stood. The most obvious thing about him was not the flag or hat or beard. It was the shoulder holster he wore with a gun securely in it. We were aware of the presence of 4 police officers since the beginning of the event and 3 of them were immediately speaking to the flag-carrying individual. A young mother standing close to me whose children were with her said, “There are children here.”

We don’t know if he was asked to leave but he did NOT. The crowd began a chant of, “LEAVE, LEAVE, LEAVE.” When he didn’t leave, a local TV station’s ‘on the scene’ reporter arrived and began videoing. A group of OUR men surrounded the MAGA visitor, never touching him, never uttering a word and raised their signs to cover him from the prying eyes of the camera, eliminating a possible interview and the opportunity for the peaceful protest to be turned into a circus. It was an expert move that was beautifully executed.

The visitor decided to leave, which was a blessing before any possibility of intimidation, disruption or conflict could occur. Whether or not that was the plan we’ll never know but there were no incidents and there was no chaotic story for the News at Six. For our area of Virginia, at least, there was no need for the National Guard the Virginia governor had activated the evening before the protest.

The most emotional part of the day was when one of the speakers was encouraging us, inspiring us and talking to us about how each of us was so important to restoring our country and making it truly great again as it had been before January 26. Suddenly someone began singing America the Beautiful. It spread through the crowd of hundreds until every person there seemed to be singing … all verses. And people were crying as their voices rose and the words floated away on the humid Virginia air.  It was one of the most moving moments I can remember ever being a part of and I will remember it for the rest of my life. It gave me, through my own tears, so much hope.

Exhausted and still overheated we road in silence and the comfort of the air conditioner most of the way home. And then my husband said to me, “I wouldn’t have missed this for the world.”

Pope Leo XIV

9 May

My husband and I enjoy eating lunch in our sunroom looking out over the back yard and watching deer stroll by. We also enjoy watching squirrels darting around like the yard is a playground for them especially,  and watching the stray cat we feed, but can’t get close to yet, coming for another regular meal. Today I was setting the table out there for lunch and my husband was watching a news channel inside in the kitchen. He said in a loud voice, “The smoke is white,” so I went inside just in time to see a whisp of that white smoke at the Vatican indicating a new Pope had been chosen.

The crowd waiting in anticipation of the new pope was estimated to be at least 45 thousand. When the newly chosen pope, Pope Leo XIV stepped onto the balcony for his first blessing in his new position, the crowd cheered and clapped; smiling faces showing love, appreciation and acceptance of the United States, Chicago-born previous Cardinal, Robert Prevost – the very first American pope.

The most notable thing to me about the crowd was the number of flags held high or simply being held among so many of different nationalities … flags from numbers of countries, including the American flag. When I saw it carrying  a message of hope and unity, I immediately broke down. It was such a beautiful symbol, at that moment, representing something so positive, hopeful and buoyed on the energy of love and not just the breeze. It has been a VERY long time since I’ve seen it displayed that way.

Pope Leo stood on the balcony for a little while and looked out over the cheering crowd. When he began his blessing, he opened his arms as if to embrace not only the crowd, but the world. He spoke in perfect Italian (I understand he also speaks perfectly in Spanish).

His message included respect for his recently deceased predecessor, Pope Francis and blessings for all. He encouraged the people of the world to open their hearts to others and to be kind, among other things. Those two sentiments touched me once again and brought on a second wash of tears. We have seen so little of welcome and kindness … welcoming kindness … lately that hearing his words were to me like opening a door and inviting spring back in after a very brutal winter.

I am not Catholic but I have, since childhood, had enormous respect for the several popes that have been in office (is that the right way to say that … in office?) since I’ve been a visitor in this life. The most recent of them have seemed very close to God in their beliefs and guidance. I believe Pope Leo, according to his bio and his message this early afternoon, will continue in that direction.

My hope is that this pope, the first from the United Stated of America, was selected for his position not only by the Cardinals who had the task of selecting him, but by divine intervention … perhaps as a way of balancing all that is wrong with this country. A source of good and right and love and acceptance. When I envision that possibility, I tear up again.

May God bless Pope Leo XIV as he steps forward in his new mission. And may God bless us all as we move forward in an uncertain world. 

In nursing school I learned that even in the darkest days HOPE is that random element that shows us light at the end of the tunnel and gives us the push we need to keep on keeping on.

Today I felt a renewed HOPE when Pope Leo opened his arms and invited us ALL in.  

HEROES AND VILLAINS … AND ALIENS, OH, MY!

21 Apr

(This sounds like the title of a political blog, but it ISN’T so No Warning is  Necessary!!!!)

 The room was full of people talking comfortably with each other. The conversations were interrupted occasionally with bursts of laughter … the kind of atmosphere shared by people who know each other well and have known each other for a long time.

Suddenly the room went completely quiet and all eyes turned towards the door. Darth Vader had just entered the room, looked around and pointed his light saber at the crowd. The saber suddenly came to life and so did the people in the room … clapping at Vader’s unexpected appearance. It was MAGIC in the making.  

Earlier we had all gathered in the lobby, signed in and picked up a bag of mysterious items, including glow stick bracelets and a suspicious small bag of Unicorn Poop.

We entered the ballroom passing by a display of OUR HEROES.  Life-size replicas of Captain Kirk, Captain Picard, Captain Michael Burnham, Mr. Spock and an impressive Storm Trooper ushered us into the large room and we found our seats. We were all there with a few extras … guests not dressed as we were but hoping to be a part of a 41- year history still in the making and being celebrated.

King Arthur and Morgana, Stitch, Dr. Who, Roy Rogers and Dale Evans entered the room and Princess Diana was there with Willie Nelson. It was a crowd loaded with dignitaries and celebrities but there was no paparazzi and no red carpet under foot. It was the ‘usual crowd’ of people, FRIENDS that found nothing unusual about all being at the same function dressed impressively because we’d done it before on a number of occasions. To the observer it would have appeared to be an entire room full of  HEROES AND VILLAINS. To those of us present it was ‘just US being US … “  

The Queen of Hearts arrived followed by Indiana Jones.

The room drew a collective breath when Ellen Louise Ripley came in holding her cat, Jonesy. She was followed by the life-size ALIEN himself – protruding spines and tail, 6-fingered hands and a massive head filled with rows of very sharp teeth. And then the dignitaries laughed, all 42 of us, and the event began.

There were WELCOME addresses and a virtual blessing followed by an impressive buffet. There was a fun video following dinner and after that, the very special audience was entertained for an hour by a very special entertainer / singer / impressionist / dignitary himself. He made his entertainment interactive, went into the crowd  and sang especially to several guests in his Elvis Presley persona. He invited Willie Nelson onto the stage to share the spotlight with him singing a song.

After a year of raising funds and doing good deeds, the HEROES and even the VILLAINS in the room relaxed and enjoyed being entertained. It was OUR turn.

And then Darth Vader appeared at the door. His light saber sprang to life and he greeted everyone … friends and colleagues … with a breathy, respirator-whispered, “HELLO.” The guests clapped and cheered in appreciation of one of our own.

And the “Costume Contest” began. There were judges and prizes for the winners.

The dignitaries had an opportunity to walk across the stage and show their special ‘fashions and personalities’ to all present. It was additional entertainment as stories were shared about the outfits and laughter filled the room.

Not surprisingly, Darth Vader walked away with the prize for BEST ALL AROUND costume and presentation. Our Queen of Hearts was chosen  BEST DEPICTION OF THE “HEROES AND VILLAINS” THEME and Ellen Ripley and her endearing ALIEN received the prize for MOST HUMOROUS.

The evening ended with drawings for 6 door prizes.

The occasion was our non-profit club’s 41st anniversary party – a costume event.  It gave us an evening of fun, friendship and fellowship; a chance to relax after another year of fundraising that assured the less fortunate in our area … people and animals … of having a better Christmas. It was a year that included our Annual Space Camp Contest in area schools – the winner will be taking that trip in June and is the 17th. student we’ve made the trip a once-in-a-lifetime possibility for. We are good people … all of us HEROES at the party whether we were dressed as HEROES or VILLAINS.

For that one night we could be anyone or anyTHING we wanted to be … for fun … with people with whom we shared many things in common – friendship, unusual and delightful senses of humor, an abiding civic responsibility and a genuine desire to make life better for kids, the less fortunate and discarded animals. Did I mention we are GOOD PEOPLE?

At the end of the evening, as founder and president of the club, I was asked if I could have imagined we would still be around 41 years later? When I started the club in 1984 that was the farthest thing from my mind.

Laughing, I added, “ Way back when I started this club at the tender age of TWO,  I NEVER imagined I would be filing an annual tax return for this club. That’s STILL a surprise every year when I do it.”

It was easily the BEST anniversary party we have had, celebrating our accomplishments, our friendship and the fact that most of us have grown up and gotten older TOGETHER.

Dressed as our favorite HEROES AND VILLAINS, we collectively understood that you’re never too old to play … and that makes my heart happy.

WHERE HAS ALL THE LAUGHTER GONE?

8 Mar

Before I started writing this blog in 2013 my head was filled with ideas and I couldn’t wait to write them down and share them. Finding a platform for that was as simple as caving in to the pressures exerted on me by my friend and mentor, Darrell Laurant, who finally convinced me to write a blog.

I’d actually started selling some of my articles to magazines and newspapers and had stories published in two volumes of Chicken Soup for the Soul.  I was still awestruck at getting paid for stuff I’d written. Before starting the blog, I wondered if  I should go back to no monetary compensation and try something new or just keep trying to move ahead when I’d only just begun.

Then I wrote that first blog entry. It was like unleashing something wonderful and exciting and wild in me. I loved writing it. It was the most powerful experience, possibly because of the freedom a blog gives you … no editor, no editing … just freedom to write what is in your brain as it runs out your fingertips into the keyboard. Having people actually READ what I wrote AND getting comments from them was inspiring. I was grateful for every person that had begun following my blog and letting me know that something I’d written made them smile or laugh or resonated with them in some personal way.

Almost immediately I started not only adding humor to my blog entries, I started writing a number of them with the INTENT of humor. I wrote and laughed out loud at myself and when the piece was published, I LOVED having people that followed me tell me that they laughed while reading it. A woman told me once she laughed not only until her sides hurt, but “I laughed until my FACE hurt, too” and that was as good as a check in the mail.

I was able to keep up the humor for a LONG time because the world was pretty tame in comparison to today and I didn’t feel the weight of it so personally. But then it changed.

School shootings erupted like lava from a volcano covering Pompeii. It was hard to be funny as often in that gripping atmosphere. I began to write about that … the sadness … the tragedy of it … the total lack of meaning of it … the bewilderment. I couldn’t find that humor that I so desperately needed … and maybe my followers did, too … in the face of the horror.

 I’d written my first book in early 2013. My second book that came out in 2021 actually had quite a bit of humor. Humor, though, wasn’t as easy to find then as it had been when it just fell out of my brain and entertained the reader  … AND entertained ME.

These past several years I’ve accidentally become a follower of politics. It was never my intention. It just happened, most probably because I love this country and I have hated seeing it compromised.

This year since January it has become more difficult. Like so many of us I have felt what I thought was depression but recently realized that it is grief. My grief has been directly related to the injury recently sustained by this country that has cradled and protected me and so many others all our lives. Seeing it  threatened and so fragile in the snarling face of what promises to devour it has been almost unbearable.

I’ve wondered where the laughter has gone.

I’m founder and president of a local non-profit that has been very important to me for so many reasons and especially the good things we’ve been able to do in our community for those less fortunate and for kids. To say THANK YOU for all their hard work, I give our members a big anniversary party every year. Since we’re a science fiction club, I always make it a Costume Event so we all have a chance once a year to be anyone or anything we want to be. Held in a local hotel ballroom, we have a meal and live entertainment, a costume contest, a nostalgic and funny video of us over the years and it’s a night to remember.

We have several very talented members these days and one of them puts the video presentation together and it’s always fantastic. Just today my husband and I were going through old video clips and photos to send to him so he can put this year’s video together for the party next month.

My husband’s office is close to our freezer in the finished basement and when I took frozen chicken out of the freezer to thaw for dinner, he called me to come into his office. He laughed and said, “Come in here. I want to show you something.” I put the frozen chicken on the cabinet top and sat down, not planning to stay.

Over the years our club has made a number of videos. The first we put together as total amateurs to enter in an amateur video contest with little hope of winning. We didn’t have a clue what we were doing and that made it funnier. We did a parody of the GANGNAM STYLE music video that was so popular at the time, only we did it wearing Star Trek and other alien costumes. We WON the contest!!! That video was what my husband had run across and wanted to show me.

I sat down, we watched and we both laughed … really laughed and it FELT SO GOOD.

While the chicken thawed on top of the counter in his office, Willy found another video we’d made with the same cast and crew … a Synchronized Swimming video that we’d titled SINK OR SWIM. What made it funny was that we weren’t swimming and we weren’t near water. We were synchronized walking / acting / doing routines and laughing, which made it hilarious. The unscripted laughter was a huge part of the video.

After some experience putting club videos together, we became pretty adept as a comedy ensemble if you didn’t watch too closely.

Sitting there watching Willy’s monitor we laughed, not only until our sides hurt … but until our faces hurt. I learned from the woman who liked my funny blog entry so long ago that her description of laughter is now the GOLD STANDARD for me.

We found yet another video parody we’d made using the same cast and crew plus someone new that dropped in to become a part of history. It was our attempt at immortalizing The Rocky Horror Picture Show.

There was, among those old archives, our rendition of the Electric Slide which included aliens dancing in the lines beside us in perfect step with us and the music. Amazingly funny because we were so bad, in my mind we were ‘Academy Award Winning funny’ in our amateur attempts which made it personal.

WE WERE PHONOMENAL.

 By the time I left Willy’s office the chicken was thawed and it was past time to fix dinner.

I guess some people would think we wasted an afternoon but, on the contrary, the afternoon lifted a ton of weight from our shoulders and we LAUGHTED … those “ripple up from the bottom of the gut” laughs that make not only your sides hurt but make your FACE hurt, too. They erupt from your mouth with such gusto and enthusiasm. It was fun and funny and nostalgic and refreshing. It let me know the laughter isn’t GONE. It just needs reviving sometimes.

We can’t allow ourselves to wonder what happened to the laughter. We have to remember that we keep it in our computers for easy access but mainly in our hearts and in those warm and beautiful places in our mind where happiness and the best memories live and thrive and keep us whole. That’s the place of laughter … and continuing hope.

PAPER STRAWS and PENNIES …..

11 Feb

If you’ve been paying attention … and I’m aware that a lot of people aren’t … things have been pretty chaotic these past 192 years since trump took office on January 19. So chaotic that it’s nearly impossible to keep up with it all even though I started out on DAY 1 attempting to keep track and making a list. It was futile. BUT I am attempting to let you know what I know  … just in case you’re one of those that hasn’t been ‘keeping up’:

  • trump has withdrawn the US from the World Health Organization, the international organization that tracks and trouble shoots with other nations the progress of  pandemics and possible pandemics, shares critical information about diseases, medical research, and surgical breakthroughs that might take each participating country eons to do alone without input from international research and trials.   Of the 194 countries that are members, the US is now one of only a tiny few countries that have elected NOT to belong to WHO.
  • Trump has withdrawn the US from the Paris Accord – that organization of countries that is constantly working to mitigate damage to the environment from pollutants that are severely influencing dangerous climate change.
  • trump has pardoned or commutted the sentences of ALL tried, convicted and incarcerated January 6 insurrectionists with no regard for the severity of their crimes, many including brutal attacks on police officers. He had promised to look at each person’s level of participation and NOT pardon those that attacked members of law enforcement but that didn’t happen. One of those released has promised retribution against those involved in his arrest and conviction, one has already been re-arrested for gun violations and another has publicly said, “Now I can buy some F – – – – – G  guns.”
  • Reversed the caps on medications for Medicare and Medicaid patients
  • Reversed the bi-partisan Infrastructure bill
  • Rounded up people assumed to be illegal immigrants without attempting to first locate, arrest and deport those who are dangerous criminals as he promised. Some of those people were American citizens of foreign heritage that simply didn’t have their papers with them at the time of raids on their places of employment and several have been Native Americans. In a video made for show, he’s deported 2 groups of 80 persons each out of this country on military transport planes with a much larger capacity than 80, at a cost to the US government of $250,000 each trip.  A smaller, but less impressive transport plane could have been used at a cost of just $85,000 per trip.
  • He is attempting to override / reverse the Constitutionally guaranteed birthright citizenship of American citizens of other nationalities born in this country.
  • He has stopped the CDC from sharing information with the public regarding the progress of the potentially fatal bird flu and any information about most everything else.
  • He has fired anyone so far that he has been able to target as a government official, advocates, and federal employees that  had ANYTHING to do with cases brought against him for fraud, conspiracy, sexual misconduct … anyone he sees as not having been loyal to him. He has attempted to make the names of FBI agents public, which could likely endanger their lives since pardoned and released insurrectionists have vowed retribution upon them.
  • He has closed vital government programs; some that give lifesaving food, medications and aid to foreign countries in desperate need of assistance.
  • He has brought on board Elon Musk, a private, trump contributor, billionaire citizen that NO ONE voted for and his team of near-adolescent, post-pubescent young white men to work covertly within government agencies, fire employees and dismantle those agencies. This includes the Treasury Department where they have gained access to the private information of ALL of us.
  • He has alienated most of our allies, suggested making Canada the 51st. state, wants to purchase Greenland, heaped tariffs upon Mexico and Canada and China to a lesser degree. He has renamed the Gulf of Mexico  the Gulf of America and has plans to take over Gaza, relocate the people and turn that war-ravaged land into a desert resort. “I will own it,” he said.
  • Because of the chaos he has instigated, gas prices have increased and fluctuated, food prices are on a steady rise and the stock market has taken several concerning and significant plunges.

As of Feb. 7,  approximately 35 lawsuits have been filed against Trump’s 46 executive orders, a number of which are Constitutionally illegal, according to lists compiled by Just Security and the Federal Register. 

Although an agreement was reached between trump and both Mexico and Canada regarding tariffs and any further action postponed for 30 days, as of February 10, trump is threatening once again to add tariffs against Mexico and Canada. This time his threat is tariffs on steel and aluminum. Reminder:  fruits, vegetables, auto parts, clothing, shoes and any number of things we depend upon here in the US come from Mexica and Canada … now including steel and aluminum … from building materials to the simplest things like soft drink cans. We can expect prices for those things to increase.

Anyone that has even a vague memory of high school Government class should have locked in their memory somewhere the knowledge that tariffs are actually paid by the consumer. Payment is due at the port of entry by the purchaser and passed along to the consumer – us … you and me. We will all feel this in our kitchens, in our homes and in our pocketbooks. These latest threatened tariffs are for 25% while the tariffs on China still hover at 10%.

There are so many truly critical things that have been damaged and continue to be damaged by this administration. There has been more damage in just 3 short weeks than could have been imagined possible. I’m not sure at this early stage if we will ever recover from the trauma.

I already don’t recognize this country and my heart weeps desperately.  What I’ve mentioned here is only a fraction of what has been done … and what is yet to come.

I haven’t been this frightened of anything since becoming an adult.

Today trump has ‘decreed’ that plastic straws will once again be in production, replacing paper ones. if the user wishes. While it’s hard to imagine the damage done to the environment by plastic drinking straws, straws made from plastics account for 8 million tons of polluting plastic entering the ocean annually. This greatly impacts the environment because they are non-biodegradable. This leads to

wildlife endangerment, marine pollution, human health risks and increased cleanup costs. Because the plastic tends to break down into very fine piece eventually, it is easily consumed by humans, leading to health risks. BUT … as a McDonalds and fast-food connoisseur, Mr. trump obviously thinks he knows what is most important here.

Today trump also has announced plans to stop production of the penny. Research shows that it costs 3 cents to manufacture just one penny, which is far from cost effective.

FINALLY, although I take no real pleasure in it, I’ve found ONE thing  that I agree with trump on. Doing away with the penny is probably a good idea. I must have no less than 20 or 30 of the things floating around in my pocketbook at any given time,  weighing down my purse and causing damage to  my shoulder.  It will take a while for businesses and restaurants to adjust their charges to exclude costs like $10.97 or $5.96 or $12.89 per purchase, but that’s a small thing once it’s done.

Doing away with the penny seems insignificant in the midst of tariffs, higher food and gas prices, huge hits to the economy, termination of our most experienced government officials and military leaders, leaving us vulnerable to attack by hostile countries and enemies, and loss of our democracy, which is the biggest and saddest insult of all.

Today in the midst of my sorrow I know we can’t give up hope … for us and, yes, for those that voted for trump. We will all be affected by these changes and I can’t take pleasure in that. I feel only sadness.

I guess we have to appreciate our small victories and any tiny sparks of positivity, if it’s only the elimination of a small denomination of money that weighs down my shoulder and takes up all that space at the bottom of my pocketbook. It’s the only thing I’ve found that doesn’t completely weigh down my spirit and my heart.

Guest Blog …

23 Jan

NOTE FROM LINDA … I’m doing something very different with this post. I have invited fellow blogger, Canadian & friend, Jane Fritz to be my GUEST BLOGGER & share her most recent blog post here on my site. Jane was born in the US & has made Canada her home since attending college there. She loves her Canadian home. She also continues to love the US & has been following our political situation here closely. Her blog reflects her observations, her thoughts & her feelings & it made me cry when I read it because I also love this country.

I wanted to share it with you for a number of reasons – because it is skillfully & beautifully written but because I wanted to share the perspective of someone from another country witnessing what is happening in ours.

Since Jane posted this just 2 days ago, Mr. trump has reversed the cap on expensive medications that President Biden worked so hard to secure through Medicare working with ‘Big Pharma’ that is helping so many retired people on fixed incomes. He has reversed the bi-partisan Infrastructure bill & has pardoned 1500 of those incarcerated for their involvement during the attack on the Capitol on Jan. 6, 2021. One of those individuals has already been arrested for gun violations, one has publicly stated, “Now I can buy some f—–g guns,” & yet another has said he WILL seek retribution on those that caused him to be incarcerated.

Because I love this country & fear for it, I agree with Jane & think her blog should be shared.

Thank you so much, Jane

Linda

GIVE ME YOUR TIRED, YOUR POOR, YOUR HUDDLED MASSES YEARNING TO BE FREE … yeah, right!

Posted on January 21, 2025 by Jane Fritz

A few weeks ago I wrote about a song I sang in school (in the U.S.), which included the line “I love the way we all live without fear.” I posited that, sadly, that sentiment doesn’t seem to hold true, at least not at the moment. Today I’m reminded of another song we sang in the school choir all those years ago, the inspiring words on the Statue of Liberty set to equally inspiring music. These are the words:

Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!

These well-known and meaningful words are from the poem The New Colossus by Emma Lazarus, who wrote the poem in 1883 to help raise money for the Statue’s pedestal. Oh, how the aspirations of a country to lead the world in freedom and charity for all have been dimmed, if not completely obliterated. I can still sing the song, with those words, but the inspiration is gone, the words are hollow.

In one day, this same country has left the United Nations World Health Organization, the worldwide organization that leads the way in fighting global pandemics and devastating infectious and insect-born diseases like malaria, and assisting with health emergencies. The new president could have applauded the work of the WHO and said that regrettably the U.S. would have to reduce its funding, but, no, he’d rather just stick it to the world.

In one day, the same country has yet again left the Paris Accord, the international agreement on mitigating climate change and signed by 196 countries, at a time when wildfires, floods, historic hurricanes, and other climate catastrophes caused by the use of fossil fuels are wreaking havoc on many parts of his very own country. Better to support of the fossil fuel industries (and stick it to the world), at a time when Planet Earth is already closing in on a tipping point. There are no words.

In one day, the tiny minority of citizens who feel like strangers in their own bodies and were finally able to see a life for themselves with the acceptance of the concept of fluid gender, hurting absolutely no-one, have been put back into their hellhole for no apparent reason. Does the new president know that one of the 12 children of his pal Elon Musk (the same fellow who gave a Nazi salute to the audience twice at the inauguration celebrations), falls into that category, not to mention that fact that all of Musk’s children, by at least 3 different women, were conceived by IVF, of which he is a huge supporter?

There’s not really any point in going on, is there. The reality the world is now facing, along with all those many Americans who wish it were otherwise, is that the America we thought we knew is dead, or at least on life support. The leaders of the Jan 6 insurrection, now pardoned, are already posting on social media that the first thing they’re going to do is go out and buy more guns. Stay tuned. The America that reached out to others in need, that had noble aspirations, even if they were a work in progress, is no more, at least not for the next four years. No more bothering with inspiration, just corner as much money as possible for the uber rich and f**k everyone else.

Goodbye for now, the America we thought we knew. We will hope that the vestiges of goodness inherent in the American Dream can be resurrected when the time comes.

JUST A DOG …

12 Jan

    “OKAAAAAAY,”  the artist said as he took the painting from it’s display location on the wall at the art show. I handed him the roll of bills – the price he’d asked for the painting, and he said, “ … if you’ll JUST leave me alone.”

    “THANK YOU SO MUCH … THANK YOU,” I gushed, clutching the painting to me as he threw both hands in the air and walked away. I was never so happy.

    I’d seen his painting at an art show two years before displayed on the wall among others by various artists; some for display purposes only and some for sale. His painting had a NFS (Not for Sale) tag on it but I hunted him down and asked the price anyway. He said, “The tag says NFS so there IS no price.” I was shattered.

    The painting was one of those rare creations that grabbed my attention immediately and touched me in one of those spots that seldom gets touched by wonder and emotion. I WANTED that painting.

    I followed the artist around at art shows for two years, always asking the price and he always gave me the same answer.

    Finally, on that day that he quoted me an astronomical price (apparently to shut me up) and I AGREED to it (which surprised both of us), he and I parted company; both of us apparently getting what we wanted … I, the painting and the artist, some unexpected money and finally, piece at art shows. I never saw him again.

    But I DO see that painting every day. It hangs in our loft and a lot of times I stop and just look at it … thinking about where the place in the painting is, what it means, the hauntingly strange beauty of it. I had saved up for nearly two years to buy it at whatever price on the off chance that I would run into the artist again and he would finally cave and sell it to me.

    I enjoy art, especially with cats as the subject matter and care more about the feelings the painting / picture  evokes in me rather than the name of the artist or, if it’s a print, what number it is. I don’t buy art work to match colors in the room. I buy it because I love to look at it and try to imagine the ‘stories’ behind the subject of the painting and that just makes me happy.

     My husband and I are ‘cat people’ but also appreciate dogs. I have a lot of cat art in our home but on a trip to our local mall several years ago I saw a large art print of Andrew Wyeth’s amazing painting, “Master bedroom,” (1965). I was captivated, whipped out my VISA and bought it. It was large and getting it through the mall to my car was a chore … but it was a labor of love.

    This very special large art print hangs over our family room sofa. I LOVE it and have spent hours lying on the sofa looking at that picture … getting lost in it … imagining all sorts of things about the house, the direction of the sunlight coming through the window you don’t see, the bedroom, and especially that old dog. I have so much deep appreciation of this lovely, haunting picture … and, of course, the dog.

    I follow David Attenborough Fans’s Post on Facebook and was surprised to see a post about this painting there today. Like the painting, the post touched me deeply and I wanted to share it.

Just a dogby Richard A. Animals:

    From time-to-time people tell me “Chill out, it’s just a dog” or “it’s a lot of money just for a dog.” They don’t understand the distance traveled, the time invested, or the costs incurred by “just a dog”.

    Some of my proudest moments have occurred with “just a dog.”

    Many hours have passed being my only company “just a dog,” but not for one moment did I feel despised. Some of my saddest moments have been because of “just a dog,” and on those gray days, the gentle touch of “just a dog” gave me comfort and the reason to get through the day.

    If you also think “it’s just a dog,” then you’ll probably understand phrases like “just a friend,” “just a sunrise” or “just a promise.”

“Just a dog” brings into my life the very essence of friendship, trust and pure unbridled joy. “Just a dog” brings out the compassion and patience that make me a better person.

    For “just a dog” I will get up early, take long walks and look forward to the future.

    So, for me and people like me, it’s not “just a dog,” but an embodiment of all the hopes and dreams of the future, the memories of the past, and the absolute joy of the moment. “Just a dog” brings out the good in me and takes my thoughts away from myself and daily worries.

    I hope one day they can understand that it’s not “just a dog,” but the one that gives me humanity and keeps me from being “just a human.”

    So, the next time you hear the phrase “just a dog,” just smile because they “just don’t get it”.

“Just A Dog,” by Richard A. Animals.

“Master bedroom,” (1965) Andrew Wyeth

Credit to the respective owner

    As a ‘cat person,’ in conclusion, I feel that way about all the cats that have ever shared my life. They have NEVER been “just a cat …”

.

The Yeti in the Cage … and the Grinch

28 Dec

“I’d really like to know who volunteered me for this,” my husband grumbled as he struggled into his yeti costume and I pushed the Velcro together for him that closed the back. He was already sweating just getting dressed to be on our club’s float in the local Christmas Parade. It was promising to be a very long night.

“Carl did,” I told him. “You were the only person that has a yeti suit.”

Willy had the yeti suit that condemned him to the cage in the parade because it was a purchase he made at our club’s annual public charity auction that funds the amazing things we do in our community. A friend, who is heavily into cosplay and is considered slightly below professional level with the costumes he’s taught himself to make, had donated the costume to the auction and my husband felt a need to bid on it and buy it. Because he had it and everyone knew he had it, he was the most likely person to wear it in the parade.

Over the past 31 years that our club has had a float in the Christmas parade we have made floats to fit all of the themes and have actually won the Grand Champion Award for BEST USE OF THE PARADE THEM 3 times in all those years.  There have been some very traditional themes and some pretty bazaar themes and this year’s was among the bazaar – Christmas at the Zoo.

So, Carl decided we should build a cage, put Willy in it in his yeti suit, have Bonnie and me as zookeepers and our float was born. Logically, Willy got volunteered because of ownership of a heavy white yeti suit.

Carl decided we should call our yeti, Duane and he laughed and laughed. We didn’t get it so he explained that years ago … YEARS ago … there was a guitarist named Duane Eddy who was quite popular and … even though only 1 person in 20 or 30 with a few years age on them might know who Duane Eddy was, Carl liked the play on names and so our Duane Yeti was born.

Willy wasn’t exactly on board with ol’ Duane and less so when he found out the plan was to mic him and as the float road down the parade route he would grunt, in true Duane Yeti style, Jingle Bells.

I made a sign that said GALACTIC ZOO and another that said, “Introducing Duane Yeti” and off we went with the rest of the floats. It was 28 degrees. Bonnie and I were really cold, but ol’ Duane, hamming it up when he realized how much the crowd was enjoying him, only had slightly cold feet. He explained that dancing … and grunting in that heavy costume kept him warm from the beginning of the parade route to the end a mile away. “It’s all about the yeti fur,” he said.

We stopped for a minute in front of the judges so they could REALLY see us and our float. Bonnie, who also was wearing a mic, told the judges who we actually were … a local non-profit organization … and introduced our yeti, explaining that by some miracle in the galaxy we had taught him to sing Jingle Bells. Willy grunted out the song and everybody on both sides of the road laughed and clapped. We were a success.

Willy actually HAD a good time (that adoring, clapping, laughing crowd went a long way towards boosting his confidence) and the biggest miracle of all, 2 days later we found out that once again our float had won the GRAND CHAMPION AWARD FOR BEST USE OF THE PARADE THEME.  The wooden and brass plaque is lovely and looks pretty cool beside those other 3 we’ve won over the past 31 years.

It was FUN.

Winning the award was just icing on the cake. That and the charities we sponsored for Christmas just made my heart happy and made the holidays extra special … special at the end of a stressful year when we really needed ‘special.’

Three weeks later on the Sunday before Christmas our local fire department continued a tradition they began several years ago. The Sunday before Christmas they deck out a hook and ladder truck, the Fire Chief’s vehicle and another department vehicle in Christmas lights and decorations, go neighborhood to neighborhood at designated times and ride down the streets, sirens blaring and the hook and ladder truck honking. The real live Grinch rides on the back of the firetruck waving at everyone to the delight of the neighborhood children standing along the streets with parents watching the small parade go by.

We knew the approximate time the Grinch would be coming to our neighborhood. I was wrapping gifts. I stopped and went to the storm door and looked out when I heard the hook and ladder truck announcing the arrival of Mr. Grinch. Even as an adult it is exciting – maybe because it awakens some part of the inner child we still carry with us that remembers the excitement and the wonder of Christmas.

I watched out the door and just as the entourage was approaching, I saw the little girl across the street standing  at the side of the road with her parents. Just past 3 years old, she was standing there in a knit cap and a little pink coat. As the Grinch approached, she threw both hands in the air and squealed the most delightful squeal filled with excitement and anticipation and childish wonder. Suddenly I felt the magic of Christmas and years of childhood memories bubbled to the surface out of that place in my brain  … in all of our brains … where they are stored for safe keeping and I burst out in unexpected tears.

I especially thank our fire department for doing this simple thing that ignites true joy in children year after year … and reignites that indescribable magic in the hearts of children of all ages.

Going into Christmas this year I could never have imagined that, except for Willy and family, the true joy of Christmas for me would come from a surprise visit from the Grinch … and the joy brought by a yeti in a cage grunting Jingle Bells.

“ God bless us every one ….”

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