I know I've been a terrible blogger. Having a newborn is hard. Everyone said it would be and they weren't kidding. The hardest part for me is breastfeeding. Quinn is 1 month today and it still hurts every time! So far the only formula we've given her was that little bit when I had to go back to the hospital to have my csection repaired, but I'm on the verge of not letting her nurse at all anymore. If we go that route, I will pump what I can and supplement with some formula. It's a hard decision to make, but nursing is just excruciating to me and has me in tears half the time.

Anyways, here are some gorgeous pictures of my little princess that my friend Morgan Trinker took when Quinn was just 10 days old. She's chubbier now and I so wish I could slow down the growing procecss and keep her sweet and tiny forever. But I am looking forward to her sleeping more at night and she has to grow to do that.

Here are the beautiful pics:

Her daddy is clearly crazy about her already. Thank goodness, because he pretty much had to take care of her the first week. Although things didn't go exactly as planned, it was worth every bit of it and we could not be happier.

We went in Sunday night to be induced and hadn't made much progress by 8 am the next morning. They started the pitocin and the Dr came in and broke my water. At first I seemed to be progressing pretty good and the contractions really were not that bad at all. I had a wonderful nurse and she kept asking if I wanted the epi, but I kept holding off because I didn't want to slow myself down. Finally got the epi at around 1:30 when I was 5 centimeters.

Unfortunately, I never progressed past that. The Dr said I could try a little longer if I wanted but he suggested doing the csection and I said let's go now. Honestly it was a piece of cake. Tuesday I felt great. They had me up around 4:30 AM and I was able to walk around all day and hold and nurse Quinn. Wednesday was my birthday and I didn't feel as good as I did Tuesday, but I figured it was because the morphine had worn off. I asked the Dr if we could go home so he let us go very late Wednesday and we made if home around 8 pm.

Things went south from there. Thursday I felt worse but everyone says day 3 after a csection is the worst. Also, Quinn decided she did not want to sleep at night, and nursing was not going that great. Between percocet and pain, I really couldn't do much and my wonderful and amazing husband took care of Quinn all night. Friday I felt really bad, with lots of pain on my left side. We went to the pediatrician and Quinn had lost over a pound and they had us start supplementing with finger feeding. Thank goodness they did.

We want straight from the pediatrician's to the OB and he took out my staples. When he did I started bulging out. Some of my internal stitches had popped and my fascia had not healed. He sent me straight back to the maternity ward and I was not allowed to leave the bed. At 8:30 that night they took me back to the OR to repair the fascia and they glued my skin together. Chris and Quinn stayed at the hospital with me and Chris took care of her all night and finger fed her.

The silver lining in all this was my nurse the next day. She was amazing. She had me up and about and figured out my milk had come in early on Saturday. She had Quinn nursing by noon that day and we are now going strong, no more supplementing and Quinn has gained 5 oz in 3 days.

She is absolutely perfect and we are in love.

Resting in Daddy's lap.

Going home outfit and resting in her Moses' basket.

I’m 39 weeks!!

Baby’s Size: Baby Beavers is the size of a mini watermelon.

Weight Gain/Loss: up 16 lbs. This is 1 lb more than I wanted to gain, but I'm still pretty happy with how well I've done.

Maternity Clothes: My new capri pants, layered tank tops and cardigans.

Symptoms: Heartburn, very uncomfortable, tired, stuffy nose.

Foods I’m Loving: Not a lot. Lots of things give me heartburn and I can't eat much of anything at one time. I'm craving Sonic pellet ice, water, and the weirdest thing – smelling clean things.

Foods I’m Hating: Nothing's really turning me off, I just don't want much of anything.

Sleep: Not really sleeping. Tossing and turning and can't get comfortable.

Gender: It’s a GIRL!!!

What I Miss: At this point, the list is long. I'm just over being pregnant.

What I’m Looking Forward To: Seeing her today!

Milestones: Made it all the way to the induction.

Emotions: I've been pretty calm this week although I am worried about the birth itself. Just hoping and praying that everything goes smooth (and quick!).

Our current view:

It's taken me awhile to get the pics up from my baby showers. I had great intentions of getting them both up this week, but the crazy weather threw a monkey wrench in some of my plans. During Wednesday night's thunderstorm/hail/tornado my best friend's house had extensive damage. A 25 foot cinder block wall in their basement completely collapsed and a river of water flooded their basement. As of right now, the house has been declared structurally unsafe and there's a question of whether the damage is covered by insurance. I wish I had a picture to post of the damage, but I didn't take any on my camera. Her college age daughter's apartment was in the basement and was flooded. Pretty much everything in there is lost. I did go and get most of her clothes and was able to wash them and save everything except one white coat, but most of her shoes aren't salvageable. Please pray that insurance will cover this. It's really just kind of been a surreal week and I haven't had time to think about or get nervous about the upcoming birth.

We're all set to go in Sunday night at 8 and get induced, so I want to get these last posts up before then. Here are the pics from the shower at my church. I was overwhelmed with all the lovely things for baby Quinn. My church has really been so supportive of me. Even though I totally questioned my faith as a bitter infertile, everyone just continued to support me. We are extremely blessed.

At the end, everyone laid their hands on me and prayed for the birth, the baby and our family. What a blessing.

Sorry for the picture overload, but the nursery is finally done! The only thing left to do is get two canvas pics of Quinn to hang over the changing table once she's here.

Just a few of the small details. Chris put this bird that matches the wall decal up here to look like it's sitting on the curtian rod. I think it turned out cute.

The shoe collection keeps growing. I can't stop myself.