Tag: Human Flaws

annoyance – a gift we never asked for

Life Lessons, Rage

LAWS OF FRUSTRATION: Ver 2.0

A human can get annoyed/distract from anything at any certain time. But nothing comes close to other people when it comes to annoyance. well sometimes, yes. But mostly it’s always the freaking h-u-m-a-n-s. (I know I’m over exaggerating but I have really thought this through) I mean like there’s no limit for getting offended these days, innit?

So going ahead I’ve made some pointers which can save you in the times when you’re really pissed at someone damn obnoxious.

Find the source of your annoyance:

Consider whether your offense is reality based or on the gravity of the obnoxious behavior of your own. Often, we experience such things where our perception makes us get annoyed due to our own insecurities.
For example, you become enraged at a classmate who pokes fun at the vacation photo you just posted on your Instagram. The remark was not really that hostile, but it reminds you of your childhood feelings when your brother taunted you.

Ignore unpleasing people:

People are more likely to act in ways that bring them some type of reinforcement. For people who behave in obnoxious ways, that reinforcement may be any form of attention. Is the person just wanting to elicit a reaction from others? Then make a pact with the other people in your group to refrain from laughing or paying any attention to the unwanted comments or actions. Without the desired response, the behavior may diminish on its own.
It’s really easy to get distracted but as quoted in the movie The Godfather : ‘Keep your friends close and enemies closer’
you just have to always integrate for Peace!

Preserve the individual’s self-esteem:

People are more likely to change their prejudice if they first feel good about themselves. Basically Self-affirming questions of a person who you’re trying to “de-prejudice.”
For example, in the course of the conversation about working women, give the offending individual the opportunity to talk about what he perceives to be his greatest personal accomplishments. Bumping up an “obnoxious” individual’s self-esteem may help him feel less threatened and he may alter his opinion, or at least drop the offending argument, so that everyone can move on eventually.
Always give the person a chance to improvise. If you don’t possibly see any glance of improvement go back to the previous pointer.

Lastly, I would say is start engaging with some sense of sarcasm into everything. Trust me there would be nothing left that could frighten you anymore.

p.s- Little outrage, Fickle advice, Food for thought.

Fin.

– Abhishek

Hypocrisy is a one way street

Rage

Everyone abominates hypocrisy. But, hold on, says a wise man, we’re all hypocrites. It’s part of living.
We all know hypocrisy when we see it. Decide one thing, do another and you’re there. We condemn hypocrites and hypocrisy. Dante, in his Inferno, consigned hypocrites to the eighth circle of hell. And yet, if we’re honest, we can see what a crowded place that would be. Some are either for Self-deception or Cognitive dissonance. But that’s different than saying it’s okay. If we don’t withstand hypocrisy, we’re in a big moral scrumble. This hour On Point: the human capacity for hypocrisy, and just how deep it goes.

I don’t think I’m a hypocrite, not completely, I can’t think of anything I patron for other people that I don’t believe is right or try to follow myself.
I’m not saying I’ve never done wrong things. I have, and I’m ashamed of them. But all those things where I think I should have done better I acknowledge that I was weak and that weakness is understandable and permissible.
You may think that’s a bit of a pathetic get-out, but I’m pretty sure it’s not hypocritical as long as I am similarly unjudgemental about others in similar situations.

So let’s turn to the question of whether, if hypocrisy is in some situations a bad trait, just how bad is it? In some situations is the hypocritical thing to do the right thing to do? In particular, is this often the case politics?
Consider two politicians who both pretend to worry about the predicament of the poor in order to win votes. One of them thinks it would be absurd to do, to pretend the worry about the poor. According to our definition, this politician is a liar and a cad, but he’s not a hypocrite. The other one doesn’t care much about the poor either, but let’s say he thinks he’d be a better person if he did. So he is a hypocrite but I’d prefer him to the first because at least there’s some chance that the feelings he pretends to have will eventually take hold.

Sometimes I can’t really stand the hypocrisy of the people who behave like amateurs out there. People must understand the depth of the situation and balance the social anxiety. It’s discouraging to think how many people are shocked by honesty and how few by deceit. I don’t ask for the most mature thing but they must at least try to do the right thing. We’re always pointing our fingers at someone, there are three more pointing back at you. In the literal sense, seek to understand than to be understood. A hypocrite despises those whom he deceives but has no respect for himself. He would make a dupe of himself too if he could.

I firmly believe that one day we’ll get rid of Hypocrisy, but to see that day alive, we have to work out on ourselves. Hate to admit it but its gonna be a very tough road for all of us; The Humans. I can accept failure, everyone fails at something. But I can’t accept not trying.

May the FORCE be with us!

Fin.

– Abhishek

We’re all Flawed, but does it really matters?

Life Lessons

The supposedly most independent species alive; Humans! yet we’re all bounded by something for someone or somewhere at some point, up to some extent. We all have our strongholds and weaknesses. It’s all too easy to think you need to change. Not just the things you do, but who you are.
Let’s consider if we had had everything that we ever wished to have. Doesn’t feel much of an adventure, does it? Although we will always live to feed our own needs and expectations or for others. But does it really matter? In my very honest opinion, it doesn’t. and you know why?

Let’s set your mind to the Logic perspective switch, first or foremost were just a living organism, and will eventually die someday. Even though we had a great life or worse the resultant is gonna be the same in the end. but what matters is how we lived it. Now switch your perspective switch to Philosophy, We’re all gonna survive at the age of the century where Wars have been already fought, places have been independent. One can live with an open-mind and Freedom (debatable) but what really matters is ‘Influence’. Influence may seem like nothing if you are determined enough but it does affect everything. It may be anything, be it some nice movie that you had watched, or some TED talk speech or anything that you had witnessed recently or in the past. Everything around us exists because of a cause. some may think differently but we can get influenced by anything whatsoever. It’s only a matter of time when inspiration grows as a plant of influence in your mind. I still remember when I watched a movie called Whiplash, I used to dream about being a drummer and with an imaginary drum set around me and bang whatever thing I see with a drummer-like expressions. It was basically a movie about a focused drummer who wanted to learn from the best but lost his way in the middle but eventually got back on track, influenced by the rage against his teacher or say to prove himself.

Also, a show that I had watched lately called Mr.Robot, it had one tremendous dialogue which I really think makes a difference in real life. ‘ Is it that we collectively thought Steve Jobs was a great man, even when we knew he made billions off the backs of children? Or maybe it’s that it feels like all our heroes are counterfeit. The world itself is just one big hoax, spamming each other with our running commentary of bullshit masquerading as insight, our social media faking intimacy. Or is it that we voted for this? Not with our rigged elections, but with our things, our property, our money. I’m not saying anything new. We all know why we do this, not because Hunger Games books makes us happy but because we wanna be sedated, because it’s painful not to pretend, because we’re cowards. Fuck society.’

I used to believe in what I see or what is real, but in reality, whatever happens in front of our eyes is not always the truth. It may be an elusion of the reality. Like everything in life has a behind the scenes picture.
Every day I see so many of people ranting over the Internet with their bandwagons, with issues of no purpose. One thing we all must understand is that we’re all flawed. whatever it maybe, movie, character, politicians, government or even your own parents/teachers. Criticism and judgment are two faces of a coin but are completely opposite. Now, Flawed doesn’t mean not acceptable or anything worse but not Perfect either, Nobody Is Perfect anyway.
We must stop running after the things that are only artificially important and start running after the things that matter for real and makes a difference . Stop the Succes hunting and try to be responsible for a try. Make your priorities straight, Don’t consider your needs a priority.
People are more apt to share their struggles once they feel like they’re on the other side. It’s a lot less scary so say “This is who I used to be” than “This is what I struggle with sometimes.”
I kept a running mental tally of all the ways I screwed up—all the dumb things that I have said, the stupid ideas I suggested, infinite no. of poor decisions I have made and the inevitably unsuccessful attempts I made to make people like me. How could they when I wasn’t willing to lead the way?
But this is my truth, and I give it to you, genuinely and uncensored. On a primal level, I really want to be the thriving person who should be leading the way and also accepted by all with all due respect, but I learn a little more every day that my own self-respect is the foundation of ever lasting joy.

Goodbye, amigos!

May the FORCE be with you!

Fin.

– Abhishek