Let me tell you a tale of importance and then you can make up your mind of what to spend time to think about and what to do to unwind You see it's all to do with values and comparisons at the end of the day some will be imperative some can go by the way
But when faced with a life changer so big it shifts its course Importance takes on new meaning and needs no encouraging force Because then all the things that once mattered no longer do that's the thing Yes they still carry their value but longer with passion to bring
The life-changer takes a precedence everything else second place by its side and that truly is cathartic with a feeling of peace deep inside Yes, I've the privilege of knowing and not everyone's getting that But if you could grasp just a facet you would benefit, that's a known fact
Importance is all about value what matters, what makes you tick and when coupled with a life passion there's benefit in all of it For causality sometimes is brutal and brings one down to the ground But precedent to the important is there if there's light to be found
The tall chimney stood for a hundred plus years but when it came down there weren't any tears for it had ceased function ages ago and was now letting water seep in below
So we made the decision and down it all came to make things all good and leakproof again It was actually better to tell you the truth as into the bargain we got a new roof
Yes, money was needed but at the end of the day the value now added a no brainer in play And if in the future we decide to move on a new roof will help and be relied upon
I long for the chance just to sit down and say as evening falls swift 'that was a good day' But at present that thing is often denied almost as if life had something to hide
I know it's not like that but that's how it feels as my body lies wasted and struggles to heal but it hits me daily like a slap in the face A cruel imposition like falling from grace
I long to be normal for an average day not one lying prone with little to say But one which has pride Just to be as you are living life as it should be that close or afar
It is not much to ask so I hope and I pray that soon in my future an average day I will see and embrace and call it my life instead of this struggle that still cuts like a knife
I'd built up a fortress with no door to get out trapped myself in the centre no-one heard my shout But then in an instant realisation it came and the walls of emotion went tumbling again I was free and I laughed for this was tangible, real as if all of a sudden I'd learnt how to feel
So as the dust settled and the light blasted in the emotion I'd bottled ran away with my grin and I knew beyond doubt that a see-change had come and that a major battle I'd with victory won
I wish I could say I'm well but I'm not something to do with the cancer I've got and it may be better when this gets to print but at time of writing I'm afraid there's no hint
Once again early hours and I'm wide awake Tempted to say 'well, for goodness sake'! Yet I must be brave they tell me but I am scared in these moments and just want to cry
Six hours before sunrise I sit with my pen writing words on my paper of here, now and then and the clock on the mantle is the only sound to enter the silence herein around
Cathartic these times, I own them and hold close to my heart as a warmth from the cold For night time has none of that here over me And it's only the beauty of writing I see
The words on my paper take substance and form as the hands on the clock tick closer to morn And I read them as writer and know they are fine for they come from the heart and are wholly mine
By and by I will stop and slumber will come sleep coming swiftly til night time is done But my words provide testament and will remain Until come the morrow I am here once again
I am clearly not my diagnosis Ginger Wildheart's song once said for if I'd listened to my doctors at this time I would be dead 'Cos that's the time they gave me back when the news first broke Although with chemotherapy a longer time was spoke
So that's what I am going for longevity into years this cancer will not beat me and will not result in fear I am not my diagnosis I will not succumb to this but will stand up to this cancer and live long to see the bliss
Soft words of comfort I heard from left field with Emily's hand there in mine Her voice was a rest when not at my best So I knew things would work out just fine
Ed's tower of strength, a shoulder to lean on metaphorically, physically too Gave me a strength which I felt at some length when I needed it most to imbue
The wisdom of years way beyond her youth Considerate, firm, erudite From Bezza to me in my dark hours of need Were particularly welcome at night
And Grace's care, unreserved and complete meant more than I have words to say The love of my child unique, reconciled is replete when you know it each day
Twelve weeks now passed since everything changed and our uncertain future began have been doable just with the love, care and trust which my children have in their gameplan
The Roman forum’s vista looks to ‘Jadransko More’ Its marbled stone-clad ruins On the Dalmatian shore Where Zadar’s Saint Donatus with Byzantine aplomb borrowed Roman architecture to build its walls upon
Topped Roman columns vandelised when not a crime Rebuilt in the ninth century to cylindrical design And now both serve to wonder with their different history In Zadar in Croatia On the Adriatic sea
...all about me and my life in words. I write most days, carrying an ideas book around in which I capture a word snapshot of life around me. So there's a lot here about Sussex and the sea and anything else I see that inspires.
The pictures are mine too. Some taken to match a poem; some poems written to match a pic; others chosen because they work well with words written.
Jemverse is life in words. Hope you enjoy the reading as much as I enjoy the writing...
Jemverse 