So my dad had a stroke. He will be okay, and we are thankful that this is the case. We are also thankful for the community that is in our lives, who showed up at the hospital and with meals and to pray and to take boys swimming. That was two weeks ago (only two weeks?!?), and where life seemed to be a bit crazy before, it is all out crazy after. I want to tell the story of my dad’s stroke so you can know the incredible ways God showed up and people loved well. But I feel (like so often this year) like first I need to catch my breath.
My business is running in full force. And I’m amazed and feel like I’m living a dream I didn’t know could be real. That said, I’m all-the-time busy, with phone calls and emails and taxes and all the day-in, day-out running a business stuff. The days I take photos are amazing. The other days, my learning curve is high. I’m tired, and I’m tired of being tired. And I’m grateful for the opportunity to do creative work that tells stories and captures beauty. But it didn’t slow down when my dad had a stroke, so I’m running behind.
I’m not running behind on work stuff. My bills need to be paid, so I get that done. I’m running behind on the-rest-of-life stuff.
There are no groceries in my fridge- not even milk for my morning coffee (but don’t worry, I still have blueberries).
I have not finished a book in weeks.
My journal is mostly blank.
I talk to God in passing in the morning, and sometimes that is it.
My house is messy.
My bathroom needs cleaning.
My dog needs bathing.
My feet need to run.
I want to go on vacation, but I went on vacation in June.
Fall is going to start, and I’m excited about the prospects. But I would like to stop and catch my breath.
Insomnia has crept back into my nights.
I miss writing words.
I miss nannying babies.
In some ways I feel like I’m dropping a lot of balls- the relationship kind more than the responsibilities kinds.
That said, I know I’m loved. And I know joy comes in the morning.
I’m sorry if you’re one of the balls I’ve dropped.
Being a grown-up is hard sometimes.
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