Tag: Bisexuality

Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: 03 June 26 @ 1437

I awoke to temperatures in the mid-80s and living where I do, I don’t have to go outside to know how how and muggy it is – and this was another of those moments where the weather invoked another one of those “do you remember” montages.

The first thought was about all those hot and steamy days of the last day of school sitting in a classroom that you got tired of seeing 180 days ago and squirming uncomfortably as you wait for your final report card to be handed out so you can haul ass and be free of this educational prison until after Labor Day.

180+ days of hoping, wishing, and praying for the end of the school year so that you could do more… stuff that the school year was found to put a serious damper on and hilarity of bursting from the confines of the building and into the steamy heat of June and only to find that… you have no idea what you want to do other than to take that report card home and… then what?

In the early years, “then what” meant hooking up with the fellas to see who passed and who didn’t and to offer sympathies to those who had to go to summer school or they got kept back and there was no better way than to take them somewhere and sex the living daylights out of them and with the promise that unless they got grounded or had to go to summer school, there would be more of the same tomorrow.

And the day after that. So on and so forth. Even when I’d take my yearly stint at summer camp, ooh, yeah, it was even more exciting because I knew, due to history, that there would be guys in my cabin who either knew about cock like I did, they wanted to know about it and now was their first and only chance or, um, sometimes, a reluctant guy just got caught up in the group debauchery. Then coming home and, um, catching up with the fellas and to regale them with stories of the sex I had while at camp.

I’d return to discover that a few more guys had their first ejaculation or that there was a new guy in the Band of Horny Brothers or, sadly, one of the original members had moved somewhere else and, yeah, today’s muggy heat reminds me of coming home from camp and finding out that I didn’t live where I lived anymore. It made those lazy, hazy days of summer radically different having to make new friends… and to find new lovers, both male and female.

But even then, leaving school on that last day and shouting Dr. King’s “free at last” thing at the top of our lungs only to get up the next day and… what the hell am I gonna do? Oh, sure – there was the whole “get a summer job thing” that would get in the way of, um, sexual expression even though I had a job cutting grass and doing odd jobs that afforded me opportunities to have sex and to learn a bit more about people, sex, and the things they’ll do to be able to have it.

Those hot, steamy, sultry days where being outside felt like breathing water and sitting on the wall outside of the apartment building I lived in with four of my friends and we’re trying to figure out what, if anything, we can do. Let’s collect bottles and cash them in so we can go swimming! Oh, wait – two of us can’t leave the neighborhood, dang it. Anybody feel like playing a game? Nah, it’s too hot to be out here running around but in a move that probably doesn’t make sense, it wasn’t too hot to stop us from deciding that there was only one thing left to do:

Let’s go do it to each other! The “logic” was that if we were going to get all hot, sweaty and funky, we might as well get that way doing something we loved doing. Yeah, nothing like having sweat pouring into your eyes as you suck your friend’s dick or bearing up under not only his weight but his body heat as he fucks you nice and slow and the sweat is pouring off of you and creating a puddle under you.

Coming back to school in September and having to write about how I spent my summer vacation would be a case of, ah, yeah, let’s not mention that part of what I did over the summer but, thankfully, I had… cleaner stuff I could write or talk about. Well, up to the part where what I did most of my summer was… working.

Remembering those hot-as-fuck June days and I’m sitting at work and I’d rather be doing anything other than working and that one day when one my children asked me why I had to go to work since they weren’t in school – and I told them, “Just because you have summer vacation doesn’t mean that I do…” and, yeah, not liking that one bit but the bills do not pay themselves. But now I’m sitting in my office and trying not to count down the time where I can go play in the traffic on I-95 to get home… so I can have sex with my wife and #1 poly wife and living in a house that doesn’t have air conditioning.

Whew. Getting with a guy during lunch for what amounts to be quickie blowjobs or, sometimes, meeting a woman for a lusty roll in the hay – then going home to those two horny women and, oh, yeah, spending time with my #2 poly wife and, whew, having sex with her could easily defeat the best air conditioning and make both of us be in desperate need of a shower… or a couple of them.

The memories of hot June days flow through my mind and I just sigh…

Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: 23 May 26 @ 1413

“What is it like?”

I remember the first time a guy asked me this question after I had confirmed to him that, yes, I have not only done it with a boy, but I’d also done it with a whole lot of boys. I remember two things about him in that moment; the first was his eyes doing the “big as dinner plates” thing and his prick was making a tent in his pants, which had me pretty excited because I somehow understood that I wouldn’t have to “push” him hard to give me his dick to suck.

I remember thinking about what it was like, but I had a problem: How do I put it into words without sounding like an idiot? I told him that it was fun, that it felt good and that it could feel weird at first but then it felt okay. It had taken me almost ten minutes of hemming and hawing just to tell him that because I realized that I didn’t have the words to describe what it was like for me to have sex with a boy.

I’d grow up to understand that one of the reasons why I couldn’t really answer the question was that my own brain, which knew all about everything I did with every guy, said, “This is too much shit to put together so I’m just going to simplify it for you and whether you like it or not.” But I told him that and I guess it made sense to him because he stood up, stretched, and started taking off his clothes and saying, “I wanna do it with you…”

Right away, all the blood in my body rushed to my groin and so fast it made me dizzy for a moment and I couldn’t believe how hard my dick was. He asks me what I’m waiting for and I’m slow to answer him because I’m mesmerized by his erection and the drop of dew-like precum at the tip of his prick and I almost drool but got up to strip my clothes off, too.

And then I showed him what it was like. All the while, the part of my brain that I had learned pays attention to everything said, “Yes… you’re doing it to him to show him what it’s like, but you already know this…” and the thought distracted me for a moment before going back to finish sucking him off. However, it was right in that I knew exactly and precisely how I was feeling and what it was like to have him in my mouth and the indescribable… joy I felt when he spilt his cum into my mouth so I could swallow every bit of it.

He then wanted to know what it felt like to do what I’d just done to him and with a huge smile on his face, he went to go down on me. It took him a moment to get over that “What the fuck are you doing?” thing before he kissed the head of m y dick, then licked the drop of precum that was there – and I saw him analyzing what it tasted like and not all that dissimilar to what I’d do. He said, “Hmm…” and took me into his mouth and, yep, too much too soon but recovered quickly. In that moment, I knew exactly and precisely what this was like as the touch of his mouth and tongue sent wave after wave of pleasure through me and a kind of pleasure that if there were words to describe it, I didn’t know any of them other than “It feels really good!”

I tell him that I’m about to cum and he takes a moment to suck me hard before he nods but I’m getting way too close and I tell him again and this time he nods and keeps sucking until I get to the point of no return and it feels like I got gut-punched and the only thing I can physically feel is my dick pumping in his mouth; the only things I can hear was my grunt and him going “Urp!” as my cum shot into his mouth and then the sounds of swallowing.

It had taken a few before either of us could speak and when I could, I asked, “Do you know what it’s like now and do you now know why I have a hard time explaining it?”

He smiled, shook his head and said, “I understand but there’s one other thing I need to know.”

“What’s that?” I asked even though I had a good idea.

“What’s it like to be screwed in the ass?” he asked, his voice low and soft.

He found that out a couple of days later but until then, I shared what it was like for me and saw him learning what it was like for him.

Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: 22 May 26 @ 1356

To kiss or not to kiss, that is the question.

On the forum, there’s been a “rise” (no puns yet) in, let’s say, submissive bottoms getting very serious about kissing and cuddling with a guy and, as you might imagine, the topic has split into two distinct sides: The guys who want and need to play tonsil hockey with an FWB lover and the guys who wouldn’t do it for any reason so let’s just get to why we’re here together, aight?

Katy Perry set the music world afire with her “I Kissed A Girl” song and I thought, “So what?” but, of course, people were making a gigantic deal out of it and wondering if Katy really did kiss a girl and liked it as much as her song spoke to. I don’t remember if Katy confessed to kissing a girl or not but my point here is that no male singer has released a song entitled, “I Kissed A Boy.”

If Katy’s song got everyone’s panties in a bunch, I can imagine how “I Kissed A Boy” would fuck some shit up. Now, what we know is that men in our society do not kiss each other unless they’re gay. Plain and simple, right? During all of the kissing/cuddling discussions, I was wracking my brain trying to recall some specifics about any guy I kissed and the “final count” was Gay Guys 6, Bi Guys 0. Wait… is that right? I’ve never kissed another bi guy? Ever?

Nope, not that I can recall. I’ve had “a lot” of gay guys either attempt to kiss me or they managed to sneak it in on me and, um, shit, no need in pitching a bitch about it and like I would have in my teenaged years. What I had learned at the ripe old age of 12 was that the girls I knew were right: Guys were lousy kissers and too ham-handed at it. You haven’t lived until you’ve had a girl tell you that when you kissed her, you weren’t even close to doing it right. The first guy I ever kissed was, indeed, lousy at it and it is to note that he was gay (but not the resident gay guy in the Band of Horny Brothers).

He suggested that we try it and I agreed and our lips met and before I could process the contact, his tongue had bogarted itself past my lips and almost very like he was playing with my tonsils and, oh, yeah, large amounts of saliva included. Yuck. Now, every since that first kiss I had been trying to determine if there was anything I had liked about it and the jury remained out and, to this day, hasn’t returned yet and probably never will. In the meantime, I had initiated a kiss with five other guys, all of whom were gay, and after further review, eh, it wasn’t that bad but wasn’t that… exciting and not in the way that kissing a girl can be like, um, that time “Belinda Watson” kissed me and, shit, I came in my underwear and there’s only been one other woman who could kiss me like that… but no guy has ever done.

I added my three and half cents worth to the kissing conversation and my “take it or leave it but would rather leave it” position. It’s not like I’ve never kissed a guy because I have but the only guy I actually liked and wanted to kiss was my gay boyfriend and, believe me, the first time I locked my lips onto his, I don’t know which one of us were more surprised – him or me. Fuck me… I just kissed a guy and we both liked it! Wait, for scientific purposes, let’s kiss him again to see if it feels the same way… and it did.

Since then, no guys kissed and, really, I can’t remember the last time a guy tried to kiss me or wanted to just cuddle whilst we rolled around in the bed, well, other than my aforementioned gay boyfriend. The question I asked back in the beginning of this has a high degree of validity: Do bi guys have to kiss and cuddle or it is (a) very verboten or (b) not even needed. In the now much-dreaded hookup, even if you had the time to take the time to really do each other in, kissing and cuddling wasn’t a part of the festivities and I’d had a lot of guys express a great dislike to kissing another man.

In the “majority of times,” Guy A meets Guy B at the agreed upon location, spend a few moments idly chatting before the pregnant pause hits and now it’s time to get naked and to participate in the Rise of the Boners which will inevitably lead to the Fall of the Boners. Some guys don’t mind kissing other parts of a guy’s body, i.e., his neck, ears, nipples and some guys would rather eat homeboy’s ass than to kiss him as a part of getting ready to blow him.

Now there’s a rise of behavior that strongly suggests that Guy A meets Guy B and upon greeting each other, they kiss. Some small talk before getting naked and rolling around on the bed lip-locking each other while enjoying the ensuing cuddling before mouths meet cocks or cocks meet bung holes (or both). Guys are saying that they don’t want to get with a guy who isn’t into kissing and cuddling either as foreplay or as just a thing to do because it feels good. What “we know” is that kissing and cuddling is something “only gay men” do and that’s understandable… but is it necessary or mandatory that bi men require it?

I and a lot of other guys say that it isn’t mandatory and that, if nothing else, it should be considered optional but, at least for myself only, things get… muddied. When I kissed Gay Guy #5, I hadn’t planned on kissing him and, prior to actually doing it, wasn’t even thinking about it until we’re looking at each other and that voice in my head said, “Go on, kiss him…” so I did and it was pretty good even though another voice in my head asked, “Whoa – what the fuck are you doing?”

So, under the purview of never saying never, I wouldn’t say that I would never again kiss a guy because I know me and there could be another of those moments when that voice in my head says, “Kiss him…” or “Let him kiss you and just go with it…” I wouldn’t be looking for it nor would I be expected to kiss and cuddle but I wouldn’t dare say that I’d never do it because I just might. Maybe. Don’t hold your breath but don’t be surprised. For a “quick and messy” hookup? Let’s get right to the heart of the matter, shall we? Hold still while I swallow your prick down to your pubic bone and let the lusty cocksucking commence in earnest because as I’ve said time after time, time is the enemy more than anything else because you just might have a plan in mind about how you’re going to get with the guy you’re on your way to meet… but will either of you have the time to do any of the shit y’all talked about? Maybe but usually not.

Gay porn is chock full of guys kissing and cuddling and I could see how guys watching this (and spanking the monkey) could get it into their heads that kissing and cuddling has to be done since the dudes on the screen are doing it and like their very lives depend on it. I see them doing it and my mind immediately thinks, “Yuck.” As a visual, it doesn’t work for me but, then again and as crazy as it might sound, watching two guys having sex is a visual that doesn’t really work for me and I’ve tended to agree with some women who’ve watched gay porn (for some reason) and decided that it’s not pretty to look at… and when I take a big step back, those ladies are right: It’s not pretty to look at. How can I have done something that’s an ugly visual?

That’s easy: I’m not viewing things from that third person point of view; I’m all up in the middle of the sex and not really giving a fuck what it looks like from someone else’s point of view. Yeah, yeah, I know that sounds fucked up and I agree that it does and… I stopped trying to figure this one out a long time ago. I understand that a guy who wants to kiss and cuddle as a prelude to sex could and would kick me to the curb because, um, er, let’s not and say we did even though – and like I said earlier – there’s really no telling what I might do once I’m in the moment but I’m not gonna lie to the guy and tell him that, yeah, sure – let’s kiss and cuddle first!

The kiss-and-cuddle guys on the forum say that they will not sleep with any man who doesn’t want to kiss and cuddle with them. The guys not a part of this “clique” says there’s no way in hell they’d want to kiss and cuddle with a guy and then there are the guys who are more like me in that, yuck, not a fan of kissing guys… but no telling what I might do in the right moment with the right guy. But since men kissing each other is still consider to be a very gay thing to do, does it seem to be “out of place” for bi guys to embrace something that, until ‘now’ has been the sole purview of homosexual men?

I’m… not sure. When I take another big step back, I understand that it’s a part of getting really tuned up to have sex; it’s a way to express any feeling that isn’t just lust for your sexual partner and since it’s likely that the two of you are going to be having a lot of body contact when it’s time to get to doing the deed, well, why not do some of that before the fact?

I’ll be back in a moment – I need to change computers (out at 1452).

Okay, I’m back at 1510 – I needed to move to my laptop in the living room. So, where was I?

Oh, yeah – to kiss or not to kiss a guy. Kissing is erotic. I had read something interesting about why we kiss other than a way to show affection: When guys kiss, we actually impart a little of the testosterone that’s apparently in our saliva the premise that when we’re kissing a woman and swapping spit with her, the addition of a little more testosterone being given to her is supposed to enhance her level of excitement. If this is true – and I honestly don’t know if it is or not – then when guys kiss, we’re imparting that bit more testosterone… to someone who’s already loaded up with it, making me wonder if getting more testosterone has the same effect of making us more aroused or something.

I would suppose that there could be some truth to this as I remember how I’d feel kissing my boyfriend whether it was a small token of my affection for him or we’re locking lips like the end of the world is just around the corner. Did I feel… hornier kissing him? I don’t really remember but I was already pretty damned horny for him to begin with so I would say that it’s possible… but I can’t prove or substantiate it.

To kiss or not to kiss. This is still the question and one that I don’t really have the answer to.

Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: 16 May 26 @ 1328

When I became aware of “gay dating sites,” one was recommended to me and, yeah, it was that app and, at first, I was reluctant to check it out because being literal-minded, I thought that (a) I wasn’t gay and (b) I wasn’t looking to date guys so while it was recommended to me, I didn’t go onto the site to sign up for, oh, maybe a month or two.

In fact, I wouldn’t have remembered to check the site out except I’d written the URL down and, for a moment, I was perplexed – what kind of site is this and why do I have a URL for it? It wasn’t until I’d gotten a phone call from my son-in-law that I remembered, oh, yeah, that’s right – he recommended the site. So, while we’re talking about diagnosing hard drive problems, I plug the URL into a browser and went about the process of signing up for the site.

Then I forgot about it again. Between being on-call that week and having a hectic work week to begin with, I was surprised that I could remember who I was without looking at my license so when I’m doing a search for something, I see a bookmark that, again, took me a moment to remember why it was there and I forgot all about what I was searching for, clicked the bookmark and up came the site and… I had 136 messages. And while I sat there with my mouth hanging open, four more messages arrived and… should I look or should I ignore them? It wasn’t like I was hurting for dick but 140 – no, 143 – messages? I had to look at them.

Most of them said, “Wazzup?” and nothing else. Another bunch of them had no profile worth looking at and I had wondered how those dudes expected to get some action when their profile just gave their handle and maybe their age. Those messages, along with the “Wazzup” messages were deleted, leaving me with maybe thirty messages that had full profiles written and by the time I read through them, there were only five prospects that really got my attention.

To shorten this up a bit, I slept with all five of those guys over a period of three days. I had to give it to my son-in-law – this site was a jackpot of sorts and I can’t remember any time over the next couple of months that I wasn’t 69ing with some guy and guys who, thanks to that early geolocation thing a few sites were trying, shit – a lot of guys were within walking distance while many more were maybe ten minutes away by car.

I was inundated by a flood of very eager cocksuckers and so many that I almost got tired of sucking dick. Almost. Between the two women I had in bed with me every night and the plethora of cock-hungry dudes, I was getting my ass kicked but in a very nice way. As I seem to recall, there were a couple of other “gay dating sites” out there that I did take a look at but the only dicks they had probably belonged to the guys who created the site.

Then the well ran dry. Oh, there were guys galore and hundreds of them within five miles of, whew, wherever I happened to be! I could meet a guy “for lunch,” we’d suck each other off, and hustle back to our respective jobs and, yeah, there were fifteen guys who worked where I did who were looking for lunchtime hookups and the nice part was that they didn’t care that we worked for the same company. But the number of genuine guys were being swamped by fakes and flakes and I don’t want to think of how many times I waited for a guy to show up and like he said he would and he didn’t show, didn’t call, didn’t leave a note and, shit, his site profile was deleted.

Or the number of guys who just want to talk the talk but scared to death to walk the walk and I asked one guy, “If you don’t want to do anything, why are you here and bothering me?” Or the number of guys who had profiles that I personally found offensive and like the ones where the guy who wrote it ranted and raved about making me his bitch, I’d better have a house, a job, a car, credit cards, so on and so forth. Yeah, fuck that shit. Or the number of guys who said that if the price was right, I could get their dick and I’m thinking that, damn, dude, you must think guys are seriously desperate for cock that they’d want to pay you $200 to get with your sorry ass.

Or the number of guys who’d hit me up with chat and… wassup? Check their profile – no useful info. One guy who decided to actually say more than “wassup” went on a tirade about how he was going to make me suck his dick, suck his dirty feet, and then how he was going to bend me over and fuck me so I’d better get in my car and come and get him and do it right now. I was somewhere between being seriously pissed and seriously amused and I asked him a question: “Can you read?”

He said he could. I asked, “Did you see the parts where I wrote that I was oral only and how specific I was in what I wrote?”

He said he saw it but, “I didn’t read all that shit so wazzup? You coming to get this dick or what?”

I left the chat and ignored his attempts to get me to chat with him but I respond with this: “When you learn how to read, let me know.” I’m sure he didn’t appreciate what I said and even implied but I thought it was fair since I didn’t appreciate all that shit he said he was going to do to me. I fended off a lot of guys who were, in their words, looking for a guy to be their bitch and, nope, that ain’t me and never will be. There were the guys who hit me up and wanting to get blown but they didn’t suck dick and never would and I’d ask them, “So why are you bothering me? Did you happen to see the part of my profile that said that I wanted my dick sucked, too?”

Um, no, many of them didn’t even bother to read my profile. Some of them said that they read it but was hoping that I’d blow them anyway. Still getting guys blathering about fucking me silly but they’d vanish into the ether when I’d say something about plugging them in the ass and them getting pissy and saying that they ain’t no bitch and no man was gonna touch their hole and, yeah, I figured that so you motherfuckers need to go find someone who is very willing to do what you want to do… and that ain’t me.

If being on this site didn’t teach me anything, it taught me how to weed out the assholes, fakes, and flakes. I could be on the site every day and dealing with a lot of messages, propositions, and those annoying one word chats and the end result that I could find maybe one or two guys who wanted to do what I wanted to do. Interestingly enough, most of those, ah, mutually oral guys were gay and many of them made it clear that if, by chance, I wanted to fuck them, I was cordially being invited to do so and, er, ah, there were a couple of guys who resonated with me enough that we’d suck each other silly and the moment I could get hard enough to get in there, I was in there. Two of them said that if I ever wanted another boyfriend, they’d make themselves available and, believe me – I seriously thought about it but between the pressures and stressors of my job – and living with two very horny women – having another boyfriend would have been too much and I didn’t have the time nor the patience to deal with the guys who were already being clingy.

The sites, followed by apps for the sites, were getting worse. Out of seven days of being online, I could now only find maybe – maybe – one or two guys who were genuine and looking to suck cock as much as I wanted to. I’d hear other guys complaining about the sites and apps they were unhappy with and was the site I was on any better? Well, it used to be but not so much these days and I was having enough of some 19-year-old trying to sugar daddy me or he’s acting like a little whore and like I’d pay to have sex with him. Shit, I’d never paid a woman for sex so what made these dude think I’d pay for dick?

Things got so bad that I was down to being able to find one guy who was genuine and he could pass my third condition: Don’t be my idea of an asshole. The site was overwhelmed with guys making demands about their ideal guy not be feminine in any way, was man enough to take their big dick in the ass, willing to suck their dick anywhere and be willing to drop whatever they were doing to come service them and… I don’t have the time nor the patience for this shit.

One dude said, “You’d better come get me or else!” and I asked, “Or else what?”

“I’ll tell everybody I know that you’re a cocksucker!” he said.

“Tell them,” I said. “You act like I give a fuck. By the way, no one likes a snitch but, yeah, do what you gotta do.”

The other sites and apps were, in my opinion, not all that better. One guy wanted me to piss on and in him. Another guy wanted me to dress up like a woman and yet another guy had asked if I had a problem with him wearing panties and a bra. A guy who was in “baby mode” and wanting to wear a diaper that I’d have to change and, okay, look, I changed diapers for all of my children so I’m not of a mind to be changing his dirty diapers – I just wanted to 69 with him.

I got to one guy’s house and when the door opened and I saw a woman standing there, I thought I was at the wrong house but, nope – I had the right house but he had, ah, neglected to tell me that he’d be dressed to the nines in his finest womanly gear. The “funny part?” He was amazing to have sex with. Go figure. Then there was the guy who literally lived two doors away from me and I was thinking, “Ka-ching!” but, alas, he didn’t want to “shit where he ate” and, okay, I understood that until one Saturday he comes a-knocking at my door and he wants to suck my dick. So much for what he said the other day, huh?

I would occasionally find a guy via the app; I had more luck just being in the right place at the right time. I already knew that finding a guy to have any kind of sex with took a lot of work and while the sites, early on, made it stupidly easy to find a guy – or way too many guys – that degraded quickly and disappointingly so. Surprisingly enough, I would move forward in time and tell guys who are looking for an app with possibilities that the app I was on was… still the best option out there. My protege is on every “gay dating” app out there and he often regales me with the problems he runs into and, no thanks, man – I have enough problems as it is.

Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: 15 May 26 @ 1127

I climbed from underneath my twenty-pound weighted blanket and the relative coolness of the room started to wash over me and made me think, “Move your ass…”

I’m into the morning routine and as I walk into the bathroom, whew, it feels like an early winter day in there and making me wonder, never for the first time, why bathrooms are cooler than the rest of the place. But I don’t have time to ponder this, so I push it to the back of my mind and get to handling the business.

I’m getting dressed and thinking about my morning cup of coffee; I check my watch to make sure I’m thinking that today is the 15th so I can grab the right container of medication and as I do so, I have another one of those flashbacks in time and back to those crazy days of going to school and thinking that, yeah, there won’t be any school on the 31st and school will be done with for the year in less than a month!

Perfect timing to be on a serious hunt for cock. I’m listening to the Keurig pouring the hot coffee into my cup and thinking about how the older I got, the less interest I had in the holidays leading up to school being done for the summer but until I got to that point, oh, yeah – these were good days to hook up with the fellas and find out who wants a blowjob.

As I pour a nice amount of hazelnut CoffeeMate into my cup, I’m smiling as I remember those times in the middle of May and the weather’s getting warmer most days and I – along with my fellow members of the Band of Horny Brothers – are eagerly seeking each other out so as to catch up on all the sex that evaded us during the winter and early spring.

I catch myself grinning and thinking that, on a day like today in the month of May, I could look forward to blowing five, maybe six guys; I have images of either being between a guy’s legs and sucking him as if both of our lives depend on it or we’re in a 69 and going at each other like starving animals or, depending what year is flashing through my mind, I’m face down/ass up and being pounded or hearing myself sighing as a guy’s hot cum shoots into me or mine is shooting into him and going on about the rest of my day and with the thought of it being young and… there’s also pussy to be had.

Life as a bisexual was really good back then. Well, sure, it’s always been good but I’m sitting at the computer and waiting for it to update its antivirus software, and my mind has slipped into those dividing spaces between being a pre-teen, a teen, and finally, an adult. The social situations during these specific moments in my life tend to stand out which didn’t help with growing into my sexuality all that much since not a lot of people believed that bisexuality was a real thing and men who went both ways were really in denial of being gay and women were in denial of really being lesbians and…

Year after year, none of this shit ever seemed to change so it was important to be aware of the shit being thrown around all over the place while looking for – and taking advantage of – every opportunity to get a guy’s dick hard and to make it soft again. To be in that moment just before he’s about to cum and maybe I look up at him and see him looking back at me with a “I don’t believe he’s gonna make me cum!” look on his face until his prick swells and that first spurt explodes into my mouth, making me moan and, yeah, um, sometimes, embarrassingly so but he’s so busy riding out the storm that he may not have noticed…

…and me not caring if he heard me or not and the older I got. Those moments where a guy is trying to eat my dick right off of my body carried more importance that the social clusterfuck that I’d long since been aware of and one that I realized was important to be able to understand but, um, when in a 69 with a guy, I’m not even thinking about the fact that someone who might see us would think that we were both gay.

Knowing that this social perception was about as cockeyed and wrong as anything could possibly be and while you could explain it to some folks, there were still too many who believed that if a guy is having sex with a guy, he has to be gay or he had to be desperate to have sex to take a chance of becoming gay… and like getting and/or giving a blowjob would ever and instantly make a guy gay. Sure, some guys would decide that being gay suited their purposes better and as I thought of this while typing all of this, I see the faces of the many guys who wanted to have sex with me but were afraid of turning into a flaming fag and me trying to convince them that, no, that’s not going to happen and taking the time and making the effort to convince him because I really want to suck him off.

I took a sip of coffee, feeling its warmth going down the hatch and I’m thinking about how much more difficult things got as I got older. Yes, indeed – still plenty of guys who are down with the dick and uncaring about the social stigma attached to it but that same stigma, along with “the usual societal pressures,” keeping many a guy who feels the need to do this but they can’t, they won’t, because… what would someone think of him if he did this?

I remember sitting down with myself – and after a failed attempt to get into a guy’s underwear – and pondering why guys who say they want this won’t go for it and the realization hitting me that said, “Just because you don’t have a problem with it doesn’t mean another guy wouldn’t. Remember, you’re used to this; you grew up with this and grew into it so, for you, this isn’t that big of a deal and more so when you don’t give a fuck about what someone else might say.”

And laughing at that weird moment where I “hate it” when I’m getting in my own case and being right about it. I don’t think about this in terms of oh, my goodness – what will my friends think of me – or the other reasons why guys would love a blowjob or love to give one… but. Always that “but.” Almost always the same concerns and, yes, even fears. And having to keep firmly in mind that just because I’m not afraid doesn’t mean some other guys wouldn’t be afraid… and trying to understand why they are sore afraid.

It’s not glamorous. I tell guys, “Forget that stuff you can see when you’re watching porn…” because what one can experience in real life could be seriously different. It’s… primal. Gritty. Lust fueled by that built-in imperative to sow our seed… and even recreationally. The shock and awe I’ve seen on a guy’s face when he realizes that while watching me sucking on his dick is pretty fucking surreal, it… it feels good. Many a guy has said that it feels better than when a girl/woman does it; they’ve asked themselves (or me) what they were afraid of or why didn’t they do this before now or expressing a bit of regret of having passed on chances to do it in their past but… times change. Situations change. The social stigma is a powerful thing but so is that need to bust a nut.

Would a guy have to be desperate to let a guy blow him? Honestly? No, he wouldn’t but you can never discount desperation playing into things. Absent this, uh, all that’s needed is one wanting to do it and then, not being afraid to do it which is easier said than done for the man who, before now, didn’t have a reason to be seriously considering this way to get his rocks off… or to satisfy his own curiosity because if there’s one thing that I found tends to stand out in the clear, it’s the sure and certain fact that sucking cock can’t be that bad of a thing considering all the gay men who do it… and how is it possible for all of them to be wrong?

Social norms say it is… and like that really means something when you get right down to some nitty grittiness. May and June has always been a good time to renew sexual connections with friends who are in the know and to introduce a guy to some realities he may not have really been aware of and understanding that despite what we tend to think, sucking cock isn’t always a sexuality-related thing.

It’s just sex. Maybe “not as good” as fucking but better than giving yourself friction burns beating the bishop. Do you have to like guys “like that?” Nope; you just have to want to do it. And if you want to do it, um, hmm, why haven’t you? Sure enough, there are reasons not to but if you could, would you? In my pre-teen and teen years there were more guys who would not only want to, but they seriously needed to because… testicular vascular constriction is a very real and painful thing. You might know this by another name: Blue balls. Why? Well, apparently, when it happens, the congested blood gets to clogging shit up, blood isn’t flowing the way it should and in guys who you can see this in, yeah – his balls really are blue but you probably wouldn’t see that coloring in my balls other than maybe seeing how dark they’re getting… and how much I’m pitching a bitch about my balls hurting.

Sometimes, jerking off doesn’t help and can make things hurt even more and I’ve had many a guy who was suffering from this “break down” and ask me if I’ve ever blown a guy – and, yes, I have blown a lot of guys, so what are you proposing? Well, if no one else were to find out, not only would he be willing to let me suck him off, but he’d also be willing to give sucking my dick a try – and I haven’t run across many guys (in this situation) who didn’t wind up going down on me and didn’t even think twice about it.

Why would I want to blow him? Um, because it’s fun? It makes me feel incredibly good? Why not? Yes, yes, I know that I’m not gay but if you’re of a mind to, sure – pull it out and let me at it and, hopefully, you won’t find a reason to regret the decision to do so. And, before you ask, no one is going to find out because I’m not going to tell and people you know aren’t going to kick your ass for doing it because unless you tell them, how are they going to find out?

Spring is a time of renewal and growth… and a good time to get into a guy’s underwear, you know, if you can convince him to give up the dick and it’s clear to me that it’s harder now than it was before and for a lot of the same reasons why guys may have wanted to do it in their youthful past but never got around to experiencing it… but as an adult, they most certainly do and would if the social stigma and strictures and other things weren’t getting in the way of things.

Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: 12 May 26 @ 1209

“Do bi guys eventually turn into gay guys?”

One of the things I would eventually hear about was how bi guys were really gay guys who were in denial of their gayness and, as such, they were to stop being in denial and become the gay man they know themselves to be.

I heard this more from gay dudes than anyone else and I could never really figure out why they would be so insistent that us bi guys were just gay guys in disguise. True enough, some bi guys would determine that they’re really gay or some situational shit would dictate that if he wanted to continue to be intimate and to have sex that didn’t involve masturbation only, then gay was the way to go.

A couple of members on the forum started out being bi but now they’ve embraced being gay and their stories are like a case study in why guys can go from straight to bi to gay. But to imply that a bi guy is or has to turn into a gay guy is patently ridiculous or, what I really think, it’s wishful thinking on their part and as evidenced by the many times I’ve had sex with a gay dude, and he tells me that I should really be gay.

Or they’d get miffed because I wasn’t gay and didn’t want anything to do with me other than to “demand” that I stop being in denial. From my perspective, this… mandate could have come into existence because, back in the day, it was believed that there were only two choices to be made regarding your sexuality – heterosexual or homosexual – and do not pick that last choice if you know what’s good for you. It would be proven yet again that for some men, what’s good for them are other men. It was also a “thing” that men who had been traumatized by women would wind up being gay and, I believe, gave birth to the misconception that all gay men hate women with unbridled passion.

Since there were only two “recognized” choices, it wasn’t hard for me to see how bisexuality could, bluntly, fuck some shit up in this regard and, yeah, as I’ve related too many times, if you were a guy who went both ways, something was wrong with you so pick a side… and preferably not the gay side. Some guys I knew got “conscripted” into being gay because they were told – and they believed – that bisexuality was just a side trip on the way to being fully gay and that they could save themselves some grief by accepting their gayness and, besides: Bisexuality isn’t real to begin with.

When you consider that this was a point in time were (a) bisexuals were still around because they’d always been around but (b) social norms were applying pressure to insist that there were only two ways you could be and one of them wasn’t on the approved list. I remember saying to someone who told me that there’s no way in hell I could be bisexual because there’s no such thing, “What? What am I, chopped liver or something?”

You can get to a point where you get tired of people trying to tell you that you cannot be what you know yourself to be and your actions have validated things. For male bisexuals, it was just a thing that men were for sex only and women were for sex and everything else one might need in their life and while guys were happy to have sex with guys, it would continue to be fine and dandy right up to the point where someone gets into their feelings and, oh, hell no – that’s some gay shit!

Suggest to a bi guy that he would, somewhere along the line, become a fully homosexual guy and, welp, you might want to duck and cover and, um, yeah, shit, I had to learn not to go all medieval on someone who (a) insisted that I couldn’t be bisexual because there was no such thing and (b) if it was real, it was still just a waypoint on the way to full-blown homosexuality. Some insisted that I was really on the way to being gay since everyone knew there was no such thing as a Black bisexual since all Blacks were homophobic.

Uh, nope, not where I come from. If nothing else, this whole “you’re gonna be gay anyway” thing was a lesson the group mindset and as mandated by social norms that vilified homosexuality but acknowledged that, okay, homosexuality is really real after all… but that bisexual thing? Still just a waypoint on the way to be gay.

The reality that I’ve come to understand is that a bi guy will become a gay guy if and when being gay is what best fits the way he wants or needs to live his life. For as long as I can remember, gays have said that homosexuality isn’t a choice but, um, bisexuals were being told to make the choice to be homosexual and from where I stood in the middle of all of this, it was interesting to hear “both sides” insisting that their way was the only way to be and because this seemed to be the case, it was no wonder that bisexuality could fuck up everything we thought we knew about sex and sexuality.

No one can be both and stay that way? There’s a lot of us, including myself, who’d beg to differ. Sure, I don’t know of a bi guy who hasn’t, at some point, wondered if he’s really gay and that’s usually because once one takes the plunge, whew, you just can’t get enough dick and ain’t that shit crazy? I remember a girl asking me, “Why aren’t you really gay?” and my answer was, “Because I don’t want to be…” and just before I got into those panties.

Why be only one way to be when you could be both? Yeah, uh-huh, no wonder bisexuality was being called “the best of both worlds” and, indeed it was… at least on paper but one’s real-life experiences could very much differ and to the point where guys who couldn’t get the time of day from a female would embrace a homosexual lifestyle because, as one such guy told me, “It’s better than nothing…” and that, to me, spoke to the very human need to be intimate with someone.

Today and with bi guys understanding that in their bi-ness, they can embrace the emotional side of being bisexual and it doesn’t have to be the “guys are only for sex” thing that I grew up with and always knew about. The perception that I grew up with was that if you had feelings for a guy that didn’t have anything to do with having sex, well, you must really be gay. And I, along with every bi guy I knew, believed this… right up to the point where I got… reeducated about such things because I was in love with a gay man, but it didn’t change the fact that I was very much bisexual.

Hmm. So, um, you can be a guy, have deep feelings for another guy, but that doesn’t make you gay and like everyone believed. Is it a given that a bi guy is going to become a gay one? No and anyone who believes this would be regurgitating a misconception that is way older than I am. Again, a bi guy could choose to be gay if it suited his purposes but if it didn’t, who says he has to become gay at some point?

That would be mostly gay dudes and straight dudes who believe that their ways are the only way to be and if you’re a real man, you won’t be a gay one while gay men will let you know in no uncertain terms that they, too, are real men because they’ve accept the real truth about themselves and very much unlike all those greedy bisexual motherfuckers who don’t want to accept the real truth about themselves.

Uh, yeah, right, sure. Whatever. For as long as I care to remember, a guy could find out that girls aren’t the only people you can have sex with. Despite what we were told and taught, guys can and do have sex with each other and get this: Not all of them are homosexual. The persistent insistence that if you were a guy having sex with guys, you were in denial and you were, unquestionably and indisputable into men like gay men are. Oh, and you were only consorting with women to hide the fact that you’re really gay.

If you were to develop feelings for a guy, it could kill your sexual relationship with the object of your affection because… that was some gay shit. Today, there are bisexual men who insist upon being with guys who are into the emotional aspect of being bi and not just the sex… and they’re frustrated because guys are, still and mostly, all about the sex and not the emotional side all that much… because we continue to believe that this means you’re really gay.

Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: 09 May 26 @ 1404

A member asked about coming out, who you came out to, and how did those you came out to handled this bit of information. Coming out is probably scarier than waking up one morning and you wanna have sex with your best friend and when you never thought of him like that before.

Guys today are scared shitless of being outed and it keeps them sitting on the sidelines and “suffering” with the insistent desire and need to have sex with a guy but the problem with that is that you’d have to out yourself to a guy to be able to put the proposition on the table. Sure, there’s dropping hints and other sly things that may or may not reveal your secret to someone but in this, we have plenty of real-life horror stories told by homosexuals who came out and… some didn’t live to regret it and way too many did.

I found that a lot of the people I knew wouldn’t do well to hear something about me that they were told to never do, let alone believe in so I had to pick and choose who needed to know and who didn’t like, um, I didn’t have to tell my mother since she caught me fucking a guy so, shit, that pretty much told her that I wasn’t straight and even many years later, she had said, “I always knew there was something special about you…”

I was sixteen when I decided that I didn’t give a fuck who knew I was bisexual; they were either going to be okay with it or they weren’t and as someone told me, you’ll find out who your real friends are because they won’t give a fuck about your sexuality. I’ll say that “more than a few” of my male friends at this time jumped ship and were fearful that I was going to jump their bones. The funny part about this was that I wouldn’t have had sex with them even if it was going to save my life.

The ones I told who didn’t have a problem with my sexuality, well, um, let’s just say that some of them had already figured it out for themselves and their curiosity was piqued before my confession. One of my friends said, “Man, I’m glad you told me because I’ve been wanting to blow you since the first day I met you!”

Some dude rolled up on me at school and said, “Yo, I hear you swing both ways. Is it true? Are you some kind of faggot?”

I went from being okay to full red alert in about a half a second and said, “I’m not a faggot and, besides, it’s none of your business since I don’t know you.”

“I don’t like faggots,” he said.

“That sounds like a personal problem,” I replied.

“I’m gonna beat you straight,” he said.

Sigh. I put my books in my locker and closed it and the moment I closed the door he swung and… his punch slammed into the door, and I commenced to kicking his ass until I knocked him out. Welp, that I got suspended was a given and when the vice-principal asked why we were fighting I told him, “I’m not a faggot and I wasn’t going to let him hit me.”

Of course, I had to tell my mother why I’d been suspended for a week – and this happened after she caught me. She sighed, reminded me that violence doesn’t solve anything but agreed that I had to defend myself and, oh, yeah – I’m grounded for the rest of the month. I was allowed to see my girlfriend and our son but that was about the size of things.

I had said that if anyone doesn’t like what I am and can’t handle the truth, there’s nothing they can do about it except to not like it or me and bringing violence to me, well, I can be dangerously violent. Fortunately, I didn’t get into any other fights about my sexuality and not counting the time me and my sister beat this dude up for talking about our mother. Yeah, you talk about Mom, you’re asking to get a beat-down.

Otherwise, I was okay with the decision I made. Those who needed to know, knew; those who didn’t, didn’t and I didn’t give any fucks if they happened to find out. I lost a lot of male and female friends but, at the same time, I’d gained some friends because, come to find out, they were just as bisexual as I was and, yeah, the guy who wanted to blow me since he first met me?

We had a good time wrecking his bedroom. He had told me that he was afraid to come out and tell me that he was sexually interested in me and it was a secret from everyone else he knew and I understood it because homophobia was not only a real thing but it was driving people to take matters into their own hands and not in a good way.

I learned a lot more about people when I came out and how they strongly believed in what religion had to say about homosexuality. Like I told this one girl I had wanted to fuck really bad, “I’m not a homosexual – I’m bisexual and that means I go both ways and the fact that I suck dick has nothing to do with me wanting to make love to you.”

I didn’t get to have sex with her… but her sister was magnificent. I had to listen to “You don’t look like the type…” more than I wanted to but, okay, no – I don’t look like the type and what does the type look like anyway? When you believe that people are either straight or gay, it’s hard to believe – or even conceive – that someone could be both. One woman asked, “So, does that mean you like dudes like you do women?”

“No, I like having sex with guys and that’s about the size of it,” I said. “Like a lot of guys like me, I prefer women but if I had a chance to suck a dick, I probably wouldn’t say no.”

I learned to stop being afraid of coming out or being outed. If you need to know, I’ll tell you; if I think you don’t, well, I’ll never tell you and that’s that.

It’ll be interesting to see how other members of the forum respond to the post about coming out…

Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: 08 May 26 @ 1231

I usually scribble on and on about the joys and foibles of male bisexuality but, today, I want to do some blathering about the Tags “bisexual” and “bisexuality” that can be found in the Reader.

When I first saw this feature, I was feeling pretty good about it because it would give me a chance to read about other bisexuals who were writing about it. For the longest time, I would sit and read whatever the Tags found with interest but then stuff written by other bloggers fell off and I figured that for some, blogging can be a lot of work that takes a lot of time, and they have other things that require their attention.

For the last two or three years (give or take), the Tags changed from bloggers writing their thoughts about bisexuality to book reports on published book and/or movie/TV reviews and even, at first, a lot of “complaints” about why there wasn’t proper representation of bisexuals in books, movies, and TV. When a lot of celebrities started coming out as bi (or even gay), the Tags would show me something that I can’t say that I understand: A celebrity comes out as bi and people are losing their shit over it and they have plenty to say that’s good, bad, or indifferent.

When it’s not really those worthy folks who have the most issues with sexuality. I point to a salient moment in things when Queen Lateefa came out as bi and… the world really lost their shit over it but many of us, upon hearing about her admission, said, “Shit, girl, you didn’t tell us anything we didn’t already know about you.”

Why do we care that Lady Gaga is bisexual? Sure, the media – and at one time – would have a field day writing about her sexuality and inferring that she might really be gay and all other kinds of irrelevant nonsense, but do we care if our next-door neighbor is bisexual and having issues dealing with it? Or if it’s not our neighbor, it’s a friend or a relative that at some point in their life, got that wakeup call that does tend to freak a lot of people out.

I’m thinking that ranting and raving over the exclusion or misrepresentation of bisexuals in various mediums can be okay but not helping much on the whole of things. I’ve seen pieces of what I call psychobabble where the author… goes off the reservation about bisexuality and tend to rehash all of the negative shit I’ve ever heard about bisexuality instead of writing something that says, “Look, it’s okay to be bisexual.”

And saying something along these lines without it really saying, “Look, it’s okay to be bisexual… but.” and what follows the “but” is more tired-assed rehashing of the negatives that are older than I am – but I get it because these generational scribblers do not know what I know about bisexuality because they’re “just now” learning about something I’ve known about for almost the entirety of my life. Which, in a way, makes it kinda interesting to check the Tags and… book reports. Movie/TV reviews. Commentary about some celebrity coming out or who is suspected to not be as straight as they may appear to be.

Very few things written by real people anymore.

Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: 26 April 26 @ 1408

It’s springtime and that means that men all over this part of the world are awakening from their hibernation in their cozy caves and are on the prowl… for cock. While it’s true that the hunt for cock is one of those 24/7, seasons don’t matter kind of thing, I can remember the moment I realized this… seasonal transition had been in effect all along.

I mean, way back in the day, I was all about getting laid no matter the season but fall and winter brought less chances of this compared to spring and summer – and especially summer and after school was over and done with for the year. I… was too busy during the spring hunting pussy and finding more dick than I knew what to do with – which offset, well, not a true lack of pussy but when I couldn’t convince a girl to let me in her bra and panties, there could be five or more guys who needed no convincing.

I just never really noticed the seasonal transitions until I was 30. In the winter of that year, I had plenty of pussy on hand and trying to get a handle on having a wife and a poly wife (and she loved to fuck) but dick was fairly scarce and suitable guys… weren’t of a mind to venture out of the warmth and comfort of their caves and, in a way, I couldn’t really blame them because, as I seem to remember, that winter wasn’t exactly pleasant. Easier to stay inside and if you had willing pussy – and I had two – well, just hoping that (1) I could coax a guy out of hibernation and (2) that spring would hurry the fuck up and get here because I was sick and tired of being cold…

…and having to go through the winter only having enjoyed two or three cocks. That’s about the time when I realized that, huh, this… transition has been in place all along and I kicked myself a few times because I now saw that I was a part of that transition – and that probably explained why I never really noticed it before now – and, hmm, isn’t this interesting or what? I saw that while the spring would bring out a glut of guys looking for cock and ass to play with, summer kinda backed off a bit due to guys with families being on vacation and stuff like that but even in the heat of summer, when your lady let you know that it was too hot to be having sex, there were a ton of guys who’d say it wasn’t hot enough and let’s bring the scorching sexual heat!

Now that I aware of this, I could sit down with myself and see that in the spring, I was getting dick like no one’s business and come summer, shit, there weren’t enough hours in the day to partake of all of the opportunities to have sex with a guy. Fall would arrive, school started, and cock didn’t exactly dry up but the fall just made it… uncomfortable trying to get dicked down in our vacant building hideouts, many of which didn’t have glass in the windows – and winter just made it damned near impossible until you were fortunate enough to still have sleepovers with guys – but that sometimes meant going out in the snow and cold and, fuck, let’s not and say we did or if you did make it to a sleepover, you had to thaw out first before you could get heated up enough to spend that first night having sex until the sun came up.

Spring would roll around and the cycle would repeat even through the adult years and one could really notice it being in online forums where, in the spring, guys would populate forums looking for cock; summer would slack off a bit, fall would herald a sharp decline and winter, well, winter just fucking sucked donkey dick. I would find it curiously odd that I made my way through a bad snowstorm to get some damned good pussy… but I didn’t really feel like going up the street I lived on to have sex with the guy who wasn’t all that bad to have sex with because of, um, wind chill factors.

Brrr. Not to worry, though; once the weather stopped being freezing cold every day, me and the guy up the street would be blowing each other and like we had to make up for lost time and especially in the summer and… the whole cycle would repeat. I was watching a show on TV and they were talking about spring being a time of renewal and my mind took a flying leap into the gutter and said, “Yeah, you fucking got that right – a time to renew getting my mouth on a lot of dicks!”

That guy told me one afternoon that as good as we were together, it wasn’t worth trudging through snow and the icy, biting winds just for some good dick and… I, being a person who hates winter with a very serious passion, didn’t disagree with him but that was okay because spring was coming and guys would once again venture out from their caves to hunt for cock as well as guys venturing out to act as “prey” and knowing that they were going to get plenty of dick in their mouths and backsides and it would all be good…

…until the fall arrived again. We’re into the spring of 2026 and being on the forum shows that the cycle is very much alive and well with guys who haven’t been seen on the forum since last summer are back to talk about how badly they need some dick; the guys who, last year, was looking for someone they could lose their cherry to are back in the spring and telling us about how they sucked guys off and got fucked in the ass and they now need more of this.

And I just find it all fascinating and more so when I’ve been a part of this… cycle of renewal for a long time.

Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: 25 April 26 @ 1338

So, on the forum, there are two active postings that could be a part of a whole kind of thing. The first asks the question of whether or not, when you had your first sex with a guy, was there any kissing. The second talks about guys making out with each other and, yup, lots of swapping spit.

One member said that he didn’t understand why a guy wouldn’t want to (a) make out with a guy and (b) do a lot of kissing and then, (c) said a little something about how kissing guys makes him so hot when they make out and (d) didn’t say anything nice about guys who are (e) oral only and (f) wouldn’t kiss another guy if they had to in order to save their life.

I started to tear him a new one but decided not to. My thought about kissing is that some guys like kissing guys, some guys don’t. Duh. If you and I are just hooking up for a blowjob, it’s no surprise that the only thing being kissed would be our respective cocks. I thought that one could easily say that they don’t understand why guys would want to kiss another guy since, um, they wouldn’t be of a mind to kiss dude.

Have I kissed guys? Yes, I have, and I can count on one hand the number of times I found it to be pleasurable because, back in the younger days, I found out what a lot of girls found out: Guys can be horrible kissers. I also found out that (at the least) I could make out with a guy without kissing his lips but if he allows it – and some guys won’t – he’s got a lot of other places on his body that would respond well to a kiss.

I had told a guy not to kiss me, and he was disappointed but asked if it was okay to kiss other parts of me and I said yes and when he got to working on my neck, I had several orgasms and came close to ejaculating all over the both of us. Whew. For the record, I’ve never had a bi guy try to kiss me; it’s always been gay dudes who wanted to lip lock with me and even in those times when I’d say that I was being a little whiny bitch about kissing a dude and that just because the last dude I kissed turned me off faster than a blown fuse, that didn’t mean that the next guy who wanted to kiss would be so terrible at it.

And, yeah, they were. Now, my boyfriend? Yeah, holy shit, that dude could kiss and he was so kissable that if I closed my eyes, I could easily imagine kissing a woman, but he did say that he was just “one of the girls.” It had taken me some time to admit to myself that I just didn’t like kissing him – I loved kissing him and I had postulated that this was because I was in love with him so that made the kissing better.

In a prior but similar posting about kissing men I had allowed that I’ve had sex with women who (a) didn’t want to be kissed and/or (b) um, the lips on her face weren’t the lips I wanted to kiss and a lot of women really didn’t want to be kissed after sucking my dick or me eating their pussy and, I had noticed, that just having sex with a woman who you only wanted to have sex with didn’t seem to mandate kissing and, besides, a lot of men and women are of a mind that kissing is too personal and intimate and is only to be done with the one they love.

Making me scratch my head incredulously and wondering how a kiss can be too intimate but she could suck my dick, I’m definitely eating that pussy until she begs for mercy, and then burying my bone in her good and deep and flooding her cervix with my seed and maybe it’s just me but this sounds more intimate than kissing her… but I could be wrong.

The current mindset seems to be leaning more toward not only interacting with other guys sexually but romantically and I’m not saying it’s a bad thing but if this is how you want to interact with other men – and you want and like to be kissed – that’s fine… but you gotta know that there are guys who would either suck and/or fuck you silly and wouldn’t want to play kissy-face with you.

While all forum members are entitled to their opinion about this, it’s like the guys in favor of kissing their male sexual partner are of a mind that this is the “only way” to be sexual and intimate with a guy and anything less than this make you a bit more fucked up than the infamous blow-and-go dudes. One member had said that his preferences state that if you don’t want to kiss and cuddle during making out, you need not apply. I’m reading this, understanding his preference, but also understanding why he’s complaining about not being able to find a guy to do the nasty with.

Um, uh, that’s because there are a lot of men who aren’t gay who would rather get punched in the liver than to kiss another man. My protege loves sending me M2M porn clips with guys kissing and it makes me want to throw up because there’s nothing “sweet and tender” with these guys kissing and “gay porn” can easily give one the impression that when you’re going to have sex with a guy, y’all gotta kiss each other with great lust and force.

I tell him to stop sending me clips like that, but he sends them anyway because knows that they get my goat and not unlike guys who love to eat ass and like I love to eat pussy – and then, after eating the guy’s ass, they wanna be kissing. Yuck. But I understand how porn is made and especially how smooth editing has become over the years so that it is damned near seamless, so when you see dude down there eating the other guy’s ass like it’s the best thing ever – then seeing them kissing – those things didn’t really happy in the order that it was seen.

He sends me ass-eating clips, and I don’t even look at them pass that moment. Now, admittedly (again), I’ve eaten ass before – and only female ass… and female ass that I personally made sure was clean. I don’t need all five fingers on one hand to speak to the number of times I’ve done this but you can bet anything you wanted that after I ate her ass, she sure as fuck didn’t want to kiss me and no more than she wanted to kiss after my whole face is covered with her pussy juices.

Let’s not and say we did, okay? When listening to my male elders talk about being with a woman, kissing her was said to be mandatory because women wanted and needed to be kissed to get them hot, wet, and ready for sex. This ran counter to my sexual experiences with girls at this point in time because not only did they not want to be kissed, but they were also usually hot and wet from the start and I’d get them hotter and wetter without kissing them and, you bet, eating that pussy like it was the last meal I’d ever have. Yes, some girls/women had to be kissed, and you’d better figure out by reading her mind how to kiss her in the way she wants and likes to be kissed and… good luck.

But men are not women. Like I said earlier, I’ve never had sex with a bi guy who wanted to kiss and not all gay guys I had sex with wanted to kiss – they just wanted to get right to the matter at hand which, of course, was not only fine by me but it’s what I wanted to do, too. The last time I kissed a guy, it was intense. We really got into the kiss and, surprise – I’m the one who kissed him because it felt like the right thing to do at that precise moment.

He embodied “melting into the kiss” as I channeled my lust into the kiss and there was a part of my mind that said, “Yeah, kissing this guy ain’t bad at all!” He was kissing me back but, I dunno, “surrendered” or something and got into my assault on his mouth, lips, and tongue – and I was deeply into it myself and, yep, surprising myself but, again, it’s not like I’d never kissed a guy before and if you’re going to kiss anyone as a prelude to sex or during it, you do it with all the passion you can bring to bear but unless they wanna have their mouth “mauled,” you don’t maul them when kissing them.

The question becomes one of whether or not guys kissing guys as a prelude to sex or during it (or even after it) is mandatory or optional… or it depends on the moment. The member who said that he didn’t understand why a man wouldn’t want to kiss him, honestly, should be aware of the fact that – once again – just because he wants to be kissed doesn’t mean that the other guy wants to kiss him and I get it: If you can’t find a guy who wants to kiss and make out before the sex hops off, guess what you won’t be doing?

And while the guys who aren’t fans of kissing dudes are doing.