Some Memes You May Enjoy

Many a truth is said in jest.

- A little math humor.

- Many a truth is said in jest.

- Never not funny.

- I feel seen

Reminder of When Everyone Stopped Taking Keith Olbermann Seriously

Keith Olbermann

 

Keith Olbermann's Twitter account has been suspended. I still maintain that the wind was taken out of this pompous windbag back when left-leaning SNL made fun of him. How anyone still takes him seriously is beyond me.

Keith Olbermann has Been a National Joke for a Long Time

The moment Keith Olbermann became a national joke.

And it should be noted that the take-down came from the left - SNL and Ben Affleck.

Flotsam and Jetsam

Miscellaneous thoughts and observations.

Roger Goodell believes climate change is real. And he blames Tom Brady for it... How Spygate is causing some lifelong Democrats to leave their party... Growing up Catholic if a priest said a mass in an hour he was a "good" priest. If he consistently finished in 45 minutes he developed a cult following... Good news for Red Sox fans and bad news for Yankees fans... "The best place to store extra food is in the belly of a friend" - African proverb... Still say Keith Olbermann and Milhouse from the Simpsons were separated at birth... Praise the Lord! I've now been stigmata free for over 40-years!...

Disney / ESPN Streaming Service

Disney plans to launch a streaming service to compete with Netflix sometime in 2019. Not much is known about what Disney plans to do.

Here's what I predict or suggest what Disney should offer.

First it will be a combined linear (live channel) and on-demand offering. This leverages Disney's existing portfolio of products. This means ESPN will have to play a large role. Second it will be kid and family friendly which means no content higher than PG-13. It is this second point that helps explain some of the recent changes at ESPN (but I'll get to that later).

The first part of the package would be the following 10 channels offered for just under $10 per month:

ABC Family
ABC News Now
Disney Channel
Disney Jr.
Disney XD
ESPN
ESPN 2
ESPN Classic
ESPNEWS
ESPN U

That should be appealing to many families and at about $1 per channel it fits most budgets especially for families who have cut the cord. And more importantly it helps stem the revenue bleeding from families cutting the cord which has been a major factor in why ESPN has been a recent drag on Disney stock.

But first ESPN has to be made "non-offensive" to middle America. "Mommy you voted for Donald Trump - does that mean you and daddy are racists?" "Daddy can you help me write a paper on my hero Colin Kaepernick?" Any non-on-the-field content that may embarrass parents or cause blood pressure to rise has to be eliminated or avoided. The first step was to get rid of John Skipper who resigned December 18, 2017 supposedly because he has a "substance addiction".

What if that "substance" addiction wasn't drugs or alcohol but instead "substantial" topics and people who hold "substantial" opinions? People like Jemele Hill or Keith Olbermann. I mean most friends and colleagues were shocked at the idea Skipper had a substance addiction in the common understanding of the term. But I bet most would agree that Skipper's loyalty to the "talent" was a habit he'd find hard to break.

Author James Miller seems to agree with this idea. Miller wrote that Disney CEO Bob Iger offered to have Jimmy Pitaro come over to "help" Skipper but was declined on the grounds that Skipper "thought the move would disrupt ESPN culture." Maybe that was the whole point? Now Jimmy Pitaro has been named President of ESPN and co-chair of Disney Media Networks. The pieces just fall into place.

The second part of the package would be the on-demand content of which Disney has a library that's hard to beat. You'd of course have all the classic Disney movies and TV content for the kids. Then you'd have all the Star Wars properties and Marvel superhero movies (except Deadpool because of the R-rating - let HBO or Netflix pay for the rights to those movies). On top of that you'd have the ESPN Classic library of documentaries and classic games plus all the recent and expanding 30 for 30 documentaries.

You could market the on-demand package separately for $5 per month or you could get the linear  channels and the on-demand for $12 per month. That's an attractive package. It not only competes against Netflix but in many cases complements Netflix. Most people who cut the cord have multiple video offering. It's not an either or situation

If you keep cable then you are already paying Disney top dollar. If you cut the  cord and you either have a family or like sports the $12 per month is not much to spend especially if you've just dropped a $120 cable package.

Anyway - this is one man's read of the situation.

Flotsam and Jetsam

Miscellaneous thoughts and observations.

Who in Boston could have guessed that going into March the Celtics would be better positioned to make the playoffs than the Bruins? The Celtics were supposed to tank this year to get a high draft pick. The Bruins were supposed to contend for the Stanley Cup... Peter King is a horrible human being...  Keith Olbermann was suspended by ESPN for comments made on Twitter. I'll say it again - after the masterful lampooning of Olbermann on SNL by Ben Affleck - Obermann became a joke to both the Left and the Right... Heh heh - What color is the dress?... "I went to my doctor and told him 'My penis is burning'. He said 'That means someone is talking about it.'" - Gary Shandling... Sad but fitting joke to the situation in Russia today... Who knew? Burt Reynolds was supposedly the first choice to play Han Solo in Star Wars....

NBC Sports and NASCAR

It was announced that NBC Sports will pay $4.4 billion over 10 years for the rights to ESPN's entire NASCAR package and half of Turner's 6 races. When I read that my first thought was that NBC was trying to make their NBC Sports Network channel (formerly Versus) more appealing once a la carte cable pricing becomes a reality.

Today if someone allowed you to just keep and pay for the channels you want and not be forced into big bundles or tiers - would you keep the NBC Sports Network? My guess is that because of this new deal in the future NASCAR fans will keep that channel (over ESPN even), NHL fans will keep the channel (again even maybe over ESPN who doesn't have any NHL games), bicycle racing fans (Tour de France) and fans of the Dan Patrick Show will also have reason to be paying the monthly fee for the NBC Sports Network. And those are some of the most loyal and fervent fans around.

ESPN meanwhile just added Keith Olbermann while NBC Sports Network countered by adding NASCAR. The choice is getting clearer every day.

Linky Links

Stuff I found interesting and thought I'd share.

I hope this idea works. Dad tries to get son a job by offering free beer incentive.

Glenn Beck made $80 million last year while Keith Olbermann can't find a job. That's certainly one way to look at it.

Heh heh - If Aaron Sorkin wrote for The Mary Tyler Moore Show. Ken Levine is one funny guy.

Ken Tremendous has a good appreciation of Kevin Youkilis' time in Boston.

Joe Posnanski also has a good take on Youk.

One final take on Kevin Youkilis. I agree 100% that the Red Sox got much more out of Youkilis than he got out of them.

Wow - as Chris Lindsay points out Coke makes so many products that if you drank one every day it would take over 9 years to try them all.

Flotsam and Jetsam

Miscellaneous thoughts and observations.

Kate Upton turns 20-years old on Sunday. Knowing this I now feel like a dirty old man (though I'm not really that old)... I'll Have Another is scratched from the Belmont on Saturday. Let the doping rumors begin!!... If you are a fan of politics and of JRR Tolkien's Lord of the Rings - you'll get a kick out of this photoshop... Barack Obama skipped going to Wisconsin to help out in the recall effort probably because his internal polls showed that it was a losing effort and he didn't want to be associated with that loss. I wonder if this also explains why he hasn't been to Massachusetts to help out Elizabeth Warren... Heh heh - PornHub wants Chad Ochocinco to change his name for one day to Seisnueve (69)... Is it some sort of subliminal advertising? I can remember a stupid commercial about a truck driving up a roller-coaster that's on fire but I can't remember what kind of truck it was. Just as well... What Wisconsin means for public sector union employees... Lord Stanley never actually watched a Stanley Cup hockey game. He just gave his sons the funds for the silver championship cup... I had a good laugh Tuesday night imagining Keith Olbermann sitting at home watching the election results and alternatively screaming at the TV, sobbing and stuffing his face with comfort food...

Flotsam and Jetsam

Miscellaneous thoughts and observations.

In the wake of NBC News admitting they edited audio from George Zimmerman to make him sound racist it should be asked if NBC would be better off just getting rid of their News Division completely. The money they will lose in a lawsuit from Zimmerman is bound to be more than any profits the News Division will bring to NBC for the next several years.. 17 offbeat holidays you can celebrate in April. Oh and happy National Tell a Lie Day. Seriously that's today - I'm not lying... I love the show Justified but one thing bothered me about last night's show. Mags Bennett made that $3.2 million everyone seems to be chasing by dealing weed. Boyd would have a monopoly on selling weed in Harlan at this point - why doesn't he just make the money the same way Mags did?... Heh heh - 10 brutally honest office signs... Damn it! "Keith Olbermann's Comfort Hookers" is too long to use as a fantasy baseball team name... Am I the only one who gets upset at the end of the movie Taken because Liam Neeson's ex-wife lets him take a cab home after he risks his life to save their daughter? She should have insisted on giving him a ride. They had a limo! It's not like they didn't have any room in the car for him... An honest snapshot of the Santorum campaign would look like this. He should drop out.

Flotsam and Jetsam

Miscellaneous thoughts and observations.

I didn't win last night's lottery but if I did I had planned to purchase the mortgage on any home for any player from the 1978 Yankees or the 1986 Mets. God help them if they would have missed a payment... Happy 84th birthday to NHL legend Gordie Howe. In his honor here's Ilya Kovalchuk's Gordie Howe hat-trick from this past February... My mind works differently than others. Proof is this morning I found myself wondering if Marcus Camby was this generation's Caldwell Jones or if he's the black Alvin Adams... Jack Johnson was born on this day in 1878. For my money - Johnson is the greatest heavyweight champion of all-time. I think Johnson in his prime would destroy Ali or Tyson. Joe Louis? That would be a great fight... I've said it before but Keith Olbermann really stopped being taken seriously after Ben Affleck's devastating spot-on impression of him on SNL. He's been a joke ever since... On this day in 1917 the US took possession of the US Virgin Islands (formerly the Danish West Indies) after paying Denmark $25 million. Talk about great deals - that $25 million would be worth just $486 million in today's dollars (less than last night's lottery total)... If I owned a minor league baseball team - I'd publicly offer Keith Olbermann the job of public announcer just for the free PR the offer would generate...

Flotsam and Jetsam

Miscellaneous thoughts and observations.

I understand that it was Woody Johnson's granddaughter who was really behind the Jets extending the contract of Mark Sanchez. She thinks he's really cute. There is also a clause in the extension that he has to take her to the prom... Probably going to hell for this - the Passive Aggression of the Christ... I will never even consider buying Geico insurance until they get rid of that stupid cavemen... Strange - I don't think the local ponds ever really froze over enough for ice skating this winter. Maybe a few of the smaller ones for a week at most. Can't ever remember a winter like that... It should be noted that Keith Olbermann really stopped being taken seriously by anyone right after Ben Affleck did his spot on impression of him on SNL. Olbermann has pretty much been a joke since... I know that Ron Paul supporters wouldn't necessarily vote for Mitt Romney even if Ron Paul told them to do so but that doesn't hold true for Ron Paul's delegates. Going into yesterday's voting Romney had 404 delegates while all other had just 337. If you added Ron Paul's total to Romney's - you'd have a truly commanding lead. This should not be forgotten. Ron Paul is Romney's insurance in case Newt or Santorum does drop out of the race.

Flotsam and Jetsam

Miscellaneous thoughts and observations.

Gordon Edes pointed out in a Tweet that Tim Wakefield did not mention either Theo Epstein or Terry Francona in his retirement speech. Supposedly Wakefield was not a real big fan of Francona because Tito pulled Wakefield from the rotation. I wouldn't be surprised if Wakefield doesn't blame Francona for not breaking the Red Sox record for wins... Watched Cedar Rapids last night. I thought it was a great movie. Then again - after watching Crocodile Dundee for the first time I was convinced it was the best movie ever made... 11 Brilliant Lifehacks. Some very cool ideas here... I knew that Shaefer is the one beer to have when you are having more than one but who knew that Shaefer was the top selling beer in Puerto Rico during the 70's and 80's?... For some perspective on Curt Schilling's overall career consider that Roy Halladay would have to have about 200 strikeouts a year for the next 6 seasons to match Schilling career strikeout mark... Keith Olbermann seems to be like one of those old world gods who ceased to exist if you stopped worshiping them... Meet a black guy in Aspen. Improv Everywhere's latest prank. I thought it was pretty funny.

Flotsam and Jetsam

Miscellaneous thoughts and observations.

Keith Olbermann is out at MSNBC. Just curious but does anyone think the Olbermann ratings came close to justifying his contract? Is anyone really surprised at this business decision? Most people deriding this move say that they just fired the guy with the highest ratings at the network but they never mention the guy had lower ratings than Samurai Jack re-runs... Interesting - Why We Have Different Types of Screws and Screwdrivers... Schtup With People will be my Fantasy Baseball team name this year. Exploding Dildos is out. I got the name from this list of awful band names. Too bad Gynecological Whack-A-Mole is too long... The trade between the Angels and Blue Jays looks like an absolute disaster. The Blue Jays get two players they can actually use while the Angels get a franchise crippling contract. Oh and did I mention that Vernon Wells has been awful at Angels Stadium (.226 BA/ .267 OBP/ .340 SLG/ .607 OPS in 159 AB). Absolute disaster... Also interesting - An elevator that publicly shames people who go only one floor... Saying Olbermann had the best ratings at MSNBC is like saying some player is the best on the Pittsburgh Pirates roster. Faint praise indeed... Meanwhile the Tampa Bay Rays signed both Johnny Damon and Manny Ramirez. Just a couple of years ago who would have guessed that Damon would get twice as much as a free agent than Manny?... I so want to have a poster sized picture of this... Those Captain Morgan commercials about rum and coke being greatest idea ever crack me up but not for the reason they intend. They have two guys with a gallon of rum and just one 2-liter bottle Coke. Those are going to be some strong drinks. I can't help but picture how those two schmucks will look when they are half-way done with the bottle of Captain...

Top 5 - Truths about Jason Whitlock's Truths

Jason Whitlock has an interesting year-end truth telling column. Here's a few comments of my own on his comments:

1. I agree that in NFL reporting - right now there's Jay Glazer and then everyone else.

2. I'm a huge football fan but I've yet to watch Football Night in America once this year with the sound not turned off. I'm not a Keith Olbermann fan and it's not because of his politics. It's because you know he thinks he's the smartest person in any room he's in and that he never played any sports and that he made Suzy Kolber cry. I can't look at him and not think "Dickhead!" Sure Dan and Keith were great in the 80's but so were Hall and Oates (if you go by hit records). I'm not interested in a Hall and Oates reunion tour any more than I'm interested in Dan and Keith trading inside jokes on prime time. Plus Tiki Barber and Jerome Bettis? Yuk.

3. Bill Simmons deserves all the praise that his supporters give him. He also very often deserves the criticisms he receives. Rick Reilly just deserves all the criticisms he receives.

4. Jason is 100% right about the Sam Cunningham route. Winning does trump whining every day of the week. Success is what matters in sports. I'm really rooting for the MAC teams to make inroads in beating "traditional" powers on a regular basis. Turner Gill should be a coach at a major program. His success will be such that it will be impossible to overlook.

5. Jason is wrong about Charles Barkley being the only major commentator to be "punished" for his views outside his area of expertise. Don Cherry was taken far more to task for his comments about the Iraq War than Barkley has for any of the myriad of subjects he's touched on.

Bonus observation - there's not a heterosexual man in the US who doesn't first stare at Erin Andrews' chest and then only second try to figure out what she's saying. Sorry - that's just the truth.

William F. Buckley Jr.

As a sure sign that God has a sense of humor Keith Olbermann was bumped from the Charlie Rose Show in order for a retrospection of Buckley's appearances on the show. Olbermann is everything that Buckley was not. Snark should not be confused for wit, naming people the worst person in the world is a far cry from explaining the hope for America and knowing how to say big words is no replacement for real intelligence. William F. Buckley made generations of people think. Keith Olbermann on the other hand has only managed to make Suzy Kolber cry.