I have a dream….
I have a dream that one day I will be free.
Free from all that binds me to this status in life,
Free from all the decision making done for me,
Free from financial, physical, and familial bonds,
Free from all which bounds us as husband and wife,
Free from all which gives me my dignity, integrity, and honesty.
I dream of one day acquiring these basic morals to adapt to my life.
To one day, tell myself, “Hey you DID it! You did it all by yourself.”
That is my dream.
If I could tell my next reincarnated self,
Please never, EVER be married, unless you have found your EQUAL significant other, and even then it’s only after careful and meticulous consideration.
If you decide to have children, please nuture them, don’t make the same mistake as I. (Having children to make your partner happy, thinking it will save the relationship, nothing will because issues are between yourselves and NOTHING will fix it., especially children!)
Please be extra careful around people. I know I am a kind hearted person which people take advantage of. Please do not repeat my mistakes; once red flags are shown once never look back. Not even a glance backwards.
Please find your passion! I am still currently finding it at the moment, that’s why it’s very important to not get side tracked. Once relationships and children come into play your priorities change.
Most of all, BE HAPPY!
Due to my dysfunction childhoon, I have a hard time accepting happiness. I am unable to accept self love, self care, etc. Please don’t ever believe you are unworthy ! You are just as special as anyone else.
Circumstances may change, but never lose your spirit for that means you have lost the thirst for life…
And remember only you can save yourself, no one else can!
That’s all I can think of for now. Will add more later!
~Lavender
I’ve been pondering about this topic for the longest time.
Do you believe in second chances ?
I use to think if I give people the benefit of a doubt; mistakes and miscommunication will be forgiven and life goes on.
So far this has worked out for me for the most part. At times it did not.
I believe this mainly lies with the person at hand.
Does that person actually want to be given a second chance or do they want the underlying problems swept under the rug?
Where do you draw the line ? The first or second cut ? Or none at all.
~
Recently, I’ve noticed occurrences that has happened in my life. I’ve noticed how my mind would register for example, oh that’s just a rock, I’m sure I can find that rock later I don’t need to worry about gathering that up for my collection. That’s how my mind use to function. Nowadays, I would observe something and my mind goes oh I better do something about it before it goes away because the next time I probably won’t get the chance.
Maybe my mind is trying to tell me something to take the leap over fear.
I’m fearful of many things.
What I’m most fearful of?
Failure.
I understand without failure, success cannot be achieved. However, consistent failure is not a recipe for success either.
Perhaps my notion of second chances will bring me faith from failure.
~Lavender
Lavender's Dream Web 