So I had to start working because of my new insurance – its all super complicated, but now I think it was illegal, and I have an atty working on all of it as we speak, but bottom line is that I some how ended up working for a great company called Winnie & Kat, they sell beautiful and super soft women’s clothing, and empower women at the same time by allowing them to earn free clothes by hosting parties.  Not many people can say I got this awesome top for free because I got a bunch of friends together.  I think its pretty cool.  Anyways, this is the weekend of the first retreat at an awesome Malibu Mansion, but I can’t go because I’ve been really sick.  Not that I need to stay in Malibu, but getting to meet the other stylists would have been fun, and getting the training that they are getting would have been awesome too.

Because I have been sick though, I haven’t really been able to work with Winnie & Kat.  Its a great line, and great people, just haven’t been healthy enough to put shows together.  I did not make very much money from the winter line, but I saved every single penny I could to order the spring line, which was very reasonably priced, and hopefully I will be well enough to do things with this line because it is extraordinary.  All I have been able to do is dress well for the doctors offices.  LOL  I’m sure in some sort of way my doctor have appreciated it?  Who knows.

I’ve been faced with “What I really want to do when I grow up” and with past jobs tonight, and I’m just not sure I have made the right choices.  My mom has to go work for the orthopedist I worked for for like ever, but in a horse capacity, helping her scout a new trainer.  And my mom has a severe hip injury.  She is only helping her because I asked the doctor to read her MRI because Kaiser has just completely dropped the ball and we really need to hear it in real terms that we’ve been hearing for years.  So she can hardly walk and is expected to walk around tomorrow for hours, and can’t take a pain pill now or it will give her a pill hangover.

For me working for this person, I thought was great.  I had little supervision, and was able to do things on my time, and was given plenty of training when I needed it.  The bad part about that is that she didn’t realize how much of the job I was actually doing and how little of the job my “superior” was doing, and how much I was covering for her.  I got a “raise” after two and a half years, but I never really got it.  I was supposed to get health insurance too, but never got it.  I was so generous in my working with the doctor and her family, I bought presents for all her kids for birthday and christmas, for her I orchestrated a huge lunch of mini cupcakes I hand picked to be delivered to the office, and I had one of the vendors sponsor a lunch for us, which was a big deal because we never ate lunch.  I did this, and I’m sure she thinks that it was my co-workers idea as well, because she split the cost of the costly cupcakes with me.  I also bought “just because I’m grateful to have a job” gifts” when I would see something that the family would like.  I never got so much as a thank you, after I had been asked to give up holiday dinners at Maestros, Valentines Day, and other nice things to take care of her family.  My birthday passed twice, and I never got so much as a “Happy Birthday” even when I worked on my birthday, and I got the standard Christmas bonus, late one year, and I had to stop working for health reasons three weeks before Christmas, the next, and didn’t get my Christmas bonus that year.  Cold.  After the failed raise and the failed health care promise, she failed on my bonus after two and a half years?  So not cool.

When I go back to work, my mom says I should go back to work for someone small like her (NOT HER!) but I would ideally like to go back to work for my all time favorite employer at a wealth management firm.  Now they were nice to me.  The CEO would treat me so nice, he was going to buy me my first suit so I could go on a big meeting with them, he paid for me and my roommate’s boxing bootcamp (yes I used to box!), he paid for my therapy (I was raped after I started working for him) and he paid for Spectrum Club, and several meals, some with his family.   I loved that job.

It was me and a bunch of me, then kept trying to get me to cry, lol, but they could not!! Suckas! After restaurant work – that changes you!! lol  They were going to make me a Junior CFO after I graduated but it was a bad market.  I waited it out, and took some temp jobs that turned into permanent jobs like with the doctor, and then I got his call, my dream job call, and it was just the wrong time.  I got talked out of the job my my ex fiancé, because he didn’t believe my heart was fully in finance because I never talked about it.  But what he really didn’t want was me away from home and in Santa Monica 5 days a week, and making my own money.  Less Reliant on him, and more independent.  But we broke up shortly after that, and my health just totally gave.  He asked too much of me, and constantly pushed me when I needed to rest.  He also gave me a fucking disease!  LOL Takes a toll on the body.  Who knew I’d still be paying.  But I plan to call them when I get better and see if they even want me working there again, and go from there.  School is just so hard on me, I’d have to be healthy for a really long time before I tried that again.