Category Archives: Thoughts

Things in mind

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We’re All Just Trying to Survive (In Our Own Ways)

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Photo by Nurhossen Sarder on Pexels

During Holy Week, I realized I wasn’t really in the mood for the usual shows- no drama, no love stories, not even action. I wanted something different. Something that would make me pause and actually think.

That’s when I stumbled upon “Outlast” in Netflix, a survival contest set in the wilderness where people are pushed to their limits, physically and mentally. 

At first, I thought it was just another reality show-intense, dramatic, maybe even a little exaggerated for entertainment. But the more I watched, the more it pulled me in… not because of the competition, but because of what it revealed.

Somewhere in the middle of all that wilderness, life becomes very simple.

No comfort. No routine. No distractions.

Just the basics- staying warm, finding water, building shelter, and making decisions that actually matter.

And watching that made me realize something… life can become fragile so quickly when those basics are taken away.

But more than survival itself, what really stayed with me was the people.

How they react when things get hard.

Some stay calm and focused. Others break down. Some make wise decisions, while others act purely out of emotion. And honestly, it made me reflect-because aren’t we all like that too?

We may not be out there in the wilderness, but in our own way, we’re all trying to survive something.

Deadlines. Financial pressure. Family responsibilities. Personal struggles we don’t always talk about.

Different situations, yes- but sometimes, the same feeling. That quiet pressure to keep going even when things feel uncertain.

One thing I noticed while watching is how easily energy gets wasted under pressure.

In survival, every movement matters. Every decision counts.

And in real life… I think it’s the same, just less obvious.

We lose energy to overthinking. To stress. To distractions. To unnecessary drama.

And most of the time, we don’t even realize how much it drains us.

Lately, I’ve been learning that survival isn’t always about being strong.

Sometimes, it’s about being clear.

Clear on what really matters.

Clear on what to hold on to… and what to let go of.

Clear enough to pause, breathe, and not react right away.

Watching Outlast didn’t just feel like entertainment.

It felt like a quiet reminder-

That life puts us in small “survival moments” every day. Not in extreme ways, but in the choices we make, the challenges we face, and the way we respond to them.

And maybe the real skill isn’t just surviving those moments…

…but learning how to stay grounded while going through them.

And maybe that’s what this season is really about. Holy Week isn’t just a pause from our usual routine-it’s a time for reflection, quiet moments, and prayer. A chance to slow down and really look at our lives, not just rush through them.

And sometimes, even something as simple as watching a meaningful show like “Outlast” can open that space for us-to think, to reflect, and to see things from a different perspective.

Because in the end, it’s not just about what we watch…

…it’s about what we take with us after.

~Nodz

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The Soundtrack of Simpler Days: Remembering Those Innocent Days

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There’s something magical about hearing an old song and suddenly finding yourself back in the late 80s when life felt simpler, lighter, and full of moments that still make us smile today. Sometimes all it takes is one familiar beat to bring back a thousand memories: childhood days spent playing outside, dancing without a care, and enjoying a world that moved just a little slower.

This morning, I played an 80s and 90s dance compilation we used to listen to while driving, now it’s playing here at home. I suddenly found myself missing those years, and one of the easiest ways to bring them back is through music. The beat fills the room with that familiar, happy energy. Every song unlocks another memory. Mama and I ended up talking about all the fun we had back then.

There’s this one old dance song that instantly brought me back to the year when my cousin and I joined a dance contest. I won’t go into every detail, but piece by piece, the memories came flooding back. During our number, everything went wrong. Back then we were using cassette tapes, and one got caught and tangled in the player, so a different version of the song suddenly started. I remember just freezing, not knowing what to do, and the whole performance ended up a mess hahaha!Even so, it was fun and memorable.

Back then, I often spent time alone with music, borrowing my cousin’s Walkman and some of his tapes, sitting by the window, lost in the melodies. I don’t really remember what I was thinking, only the feeling of lightness each moment brought. Kids my age would hang out on the streets, playing and dancing, and of course, experiencing those innocent little crushes. Life had a different, simple vibe for kids in the 80s and 90s. Those moments still feel so special.

Thinking back, it’s amazing how these small moments-dancing to a favorite song, running around the streets with friends, borrowing a cousin’s Walkman -still hold so much joy decades later. Life was simpler then, full of innocence, laughter, and little adventures that didn’t need to be recorded or shared, they were just meant to be felt. And yet, all it takes is a familiar beat, a melody, or a rhythm to transport us right back there, reminding us that those carefree days helped shape who we are, and that the magic of childhood never really leaves us. Even for just an hour or two, I got to travel back in time, and it felt so good. Well, I’m back in 2025, and errands are waiting now! Time to get back to reality. I almost forgot about them while reminiscing. Ciao 🫶

Wishing everyone a Merry Christmas Holiday! 🎄💜

~Nodz

Photo by cottonbro studio

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Strong Self, Strong Family

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We often think that caring for family means putting ourselves last, pushing through exhaustion, ignoring stress, and sacrificing every bit of energy “for their sake.” But the truth is simple: our well-being sets the tone for the household, and whatever we carry inside quietly spills into the people we love.

When I cared for my sick child years ago, I learned firsthand how important it is to care for my own inner world. Writing and blogging became my safe space – a way to make sense of my emotions and keep my mental health steady. In the middle of exhaustion and uncertainty, I slowly discovered pockets of calm, humility, and kindness within myself. Spiritually, I realized that we’re not meant to be perfect. We stumble, we get overwhelmed, but God’s grace lifts us again. That season reshaped me. It matured how I see life and gave me the strength -mentally, physically, and spiritually – to survive challenges. The growth and grounding it gave me from writing were priceless, and it helped me show up stronger for my family.

Now, another season- stepping into the role of caring for my elderly mother, I’m confronted with a challenge that tests my mental strength more than anything else. Our personalities clash, and her unappreciative attitude often leaves me emotionally exhausted. I remind myself that parents come from a different generation, shaped by their own hardships and limitations, and sometimes they express themselves in ways that are difficult for us to understand. Some days, the need for quiet feels like survival, yet I still battle guilt for wanting space. But this is my responsibility, and I’m learning to face it with compassion- for her, but also for myself. This role is emotionally heavier, mentally draining, and spiritually testing. I’ve had to rebuild my mental strength, revive my spiritual grounding, and take better care of my physical health. I remind myself every day: I must care for myself first because the strength I build becomes the strength I give.

Finding small joys has helped me sustain this balance. Writing and reading nourish my mind, while walking clears my thoughts and refreshes my heart. Little routines, like mixing and matching clothes in front of the mirror or listening to music, give me quiet “Me Time” and help me regain calm. Even amidst responsibilities, I try to carve out these moments. They aren’t indulgences- they are lifelines.

Spiritually, I lean on prayer and attending Holy Mass. Prayer keeps my life aligned, reminding me that we all stumble every day, yet with God’s grace, we can recharge and continue with renewed strength.

When we take care of our own physical, mental, and spiritual health, it creates a ripple effect. We respond with patience instead of frustration. Our homes feel calmer, lighter, and more stable. Our presence becomes a source of comfort and steadiness, and our hearts grow more compassionate and understanding.

Caring for ourselves first isn’t selfish. It’s the foundation that allows us to care for our family better. The more we nurture our own well-being, the more love, patience, and strength we can offer. And in the end, when one person in the family grows healthier, everyone benefits from the ripples.

~Nodz

Photo credit :
Photo by Atlantic Ambience: https://www.pexels.com/photo/hand-holding-domino-blocks-12969405/

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When Attitude Collide With Character

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Lately, I’ve been thinking about attitude versus character – which one shows who we really are? In our daily lives, we face so many situations, big and small, and most of the time our attitude shows first. It’s that quick reaction, the instant emotion that pops out when something unexpected happens. But as the situation continues, our character reveals itself – not in the first reaction, but in how we choose to handle what comes after.

For example, think about being stuck in traffic. You get irritated, you complain, you maybe even honk a little. That’s attitude-a sudden reaction to stress. But then you find out there’s a road crash ahead, something no one can control. That’s when character steps in. Do you calm down and adjust, or do you keep ranting even when you already know the situation can’t be helped?

I realized this same thing in my own life, especially in family situations. Recently, I had an issue with my mother. She’s diabetic, and even though she knows it’s risky, she ate sweets late at night. When I reminded her gently not to overdo it, she got upset and went on a mini hunger strike -refusing proper meals and eating only boiled kamote. At that moment, I saw more than just a temporary attitude. It showed her character- her stubbornness, her emotional reactions, and how she sometimes uses guilt when she feels frustrated. And honestly, it wasn’t easy for me. Moments like that can easily push you to lose your temper. But I reminded myself to stay calm. I didn’t argue, didn’t give in to emotional blackmail. I just made sure food was available and let her make her own choices. Not because I’m trying to look good  but because I’ve learned to protect my peace and react in a way that won’t drain me.

It made me remember another moment years ago with my youngest child. He was in the hospital after surgery, and suddenly his hemoglobin dropped. The attending doctor didn’t order a CBC right away, and I felt the panic and frustration rising. But even then, I tried to hold myself together. I didn’t lash out. I explained what I noticed and asked another doctor to check him. It was a tough moment, but my response mattered more than my fear.

All these experiences taught me that attitude is quick, it happens in seconds. But character stays. It’s what shows up again and again, especially in difficult moments.

We all have emotional reactions. We all get irritated, scared, stressed, or frustrated. That’s normal. But who we are is shaped by what we do after that first reaction fades. That’s when character speaks.

Attitude reacts. Character responds. And life will always give us chances to see the difference.

~ Nodz

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio: Pexel

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When Growth Feels Lonely, But Worth It

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Reflections on change, understanding, and emotional maturity.

As we grow older, life doesn’t just change us physically — it reshapes us emotionally. The way we respond, connect, and interpret things evolves with every experience we go through. Aging isn’t simply about the passing of years, but about how time teaches us to manage emotions, relationships, and expectations. Yet, not everyone grows in the same way — some become calmer and wiser, while others grow more guarded or resistant.

I’ve made a quiet habit of observing how people respond in conversations — especially during conflict or discomfort. It’s not manipulation; it’s curiosity. I notice who listens before speaking, who becomes defensive, and who turns a simple question into confrontation. Those reactions reveal something deeper — how far they’ve come emotionally. They guide me in deciding how much of myself I can give, how open I can be, or when it’s better to step back. Some people meet you with calm understanding; others with walls built from different reasons — past wounds, fears, or emotional pride. And maybe that’s what emotional maturity truly is: recognizing which battles are worth entering and which are better left in silence.

I’ve been away for almost two decades from the crowd I grew up with. I wasn’t there to see how they changed or who they became over the years. When I finally blended in with them again, I realized I had to adjust — not just to them, but to how time had shaped us differently. I thought things would naturally align with how I’ve changed over the years, with the kind of calm and perspective I’ve been trying to live by. But I found myself frustrated, unable to deal with the changes around me. That’s when I realized it wasn’t them I needed to fix — it was my understanding that needed to grow.

The years I spent away — almost two decades — molded me deeply. Life taught me lessons the hard way, yet those challenges became my greatest teachers. They opened my mind and shaped the person I’ve become today. Still, I know growth never really ends; there will always be more to learn.

Looking back, I realize that emotional maturity isn’t about having everything figured out — it’s about staying open, even when things no longer feel familiar. It’s learning to meet people where they are, not where we expect them to be. Time may change the way we see the world, but growth is in how gently we choose to understand it — and each other.

Sometimes, I still wish to find someone who could meet me halfway — to understand where I’m coming from. But maybe that’s no longer meant to happen, and that’s alright. Writing and sharing my reflections has simply become my way of reaching out — hoping that in some small way, they might help someone see things differently, whether in a deep or simple way.

~Nodz


Photo by AS Photography

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The Dream

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I had a strange dream, in a strangely familiar place,
Walking in silence through empty old hallways.
A sacred space hidden deep in my soul I chase –
I felt peace… yet confused. Why am I here? What’s this space?

Life lately has never been easy, as I journeyed this road,
Detours, diverging paths, and crossroads heavily snowed.
Fog thick around me, and rain endlessly pouring,
While the sky flashes with thunder, relentless and roaring.

I must find my faith – keep driving, trusting peace will find me with ease.
As I closed my eyes for just a second, time seemed to freeze.
I returned to that mysterious dream, but this time I stood at a deep well –
Looking down… a sudden splash – then a voice of the Divine began to swell.

God always finds a way to send His message – though often puzzling.
He knows when we’re sinking… He sees when we’re drowning.
That dream reminded me: He’s just behind, quietly waiting.
He will never abandon – His eyes forever watching.

That Holy Bible rising, dripping with such sweet grace,
A sign from above in that quiet place.
Now I rise too – no longer blind,
With peace in my heart and soul, and God on my mind.

This poem came from a dream I had last night — not just an ordinary one, but something that made me pause and reflect deeply. The image here is what I saw in that dream: a Holy Bible rising from the water of a deep well. It felt like God was gently reminding me that even in silence, even in storms, He is near. Through this poem, I tried to capture what my soul saw and felt. May it speak to anyone else who’s quietly searching for peace, for answers, or for a moment of divine light in the dark.

~Nodz

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In The Silence, Be Someone’s Safe Place

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When I was in my late teens, I dreamed of becoming a psychologist, someone who could sit with people in their struggles and help them heal through therapy. I didn’t fully understand it then, but there was something in me—a quiet calling—to help people who felt lost. I was always the listener among friends, the one people came to for advice, for comfort, or just to be heard without judgment.

Maybe it was instinct. Maybe it was purpose. But life, as it often does, led me down a different path. The support I needed wasn’t there, and the opportunities were too far from reach. And so, I tucked that dream away.
Still, the desire to understand people, to be there for them, never really left me.

Over the years, many stories have been shared with me. Stories of pain, of grief, of people quietly questioning their worth, their path, even their will to go on. Personal issues that lingered unresolved. Secrets entrusted to me with the kind of honesty that only comes from someone desperate to be understood. I kept them all—as I was asked to—and carried them in silence.

If I ever compiled these stories into a book, it might hold more than a hundred chapters. But these stories aren’t mine to share. They were given to me in trust, and I have honored that trust all these years. In all those stories, there’s often a common thread: pain that has no place to go. Unspoken burdens. Emotional wounds from the past. Silent struggles in relationships, careers, even within oneself. When left unaddressed, these turn into something heavier-depression. And when depression becomes too much to carry alone, it sometimes leads to the darkest path: suicide.

Just recently, a friend of mine shared something that shook her deeply. Her friend—someone full of life, bubbly, athletic, and warm—attempted to take her own life. No one saw it coming. “She was the last person I’d ever expect,” my friend said. Thankfully, she was rushed to the hospital in time and survived. But the pain that led her to that point remains, and so does the realization: so many people are quietly struggling, even the ones who seem okay.

It’s a sobering reminder that we really never know what someone is carrying inside. Some people laugh the loudest because they’re hiding the loudest pain. They wear strength like a mask because they’re afraid of being seen as weak—or worse, of being misunderstood. And when people feel they have no space to be vulnerable… when they reach out and are met with silence or dismissal… that’s when hopelessness creeps in.

I remember a time in my life when I was the one reaching out. I confided in a close friend hoping to be met with comfort. But I was brushed aside. That moment stayed with me. Not because I expected her to solve my problem, but because I just needed someone to care and truly listen. This is why I believe:
We don’t always need to have answers. But we must learn to listen with presence, with compassion, and without judgment. Because sometimes, listening is what saves a life. That experience taught me something important—not just about friendship, but about the deeper needs of the human heart.

Many of the people who go through depression or consider ending their lives are not only emotionally overwhelmed… they’re spiritually empty. Somewhere along the way, they’ve lost their sense of purpose, hope, or connection with something greater than themselves. They’ve lost faith—not just in God, but in life, in people, even in their own worth.

As someone who holds faith dearly, I believe a weakened spiritual foundation often plays a role in these deep emotional crises. But here’s the thing:
We cannot force spirituality on someone who is breaking. You can’t just quote verses or give a sermon, as if you’re standing on a pulpit. That may come later—but not in the first moment of someone’s grief.

It’s like a priest or pastor delivering a homily without knowing the heart of the listener. People don’t respond to preaching when their wounds are still open. What they need first is presence. Understanding, not lectures. A safe space to release what’s inside.

Listening must come first.

Only when we truly listen can we begin to understand where the pain is rooted—whether it’s a deep loss, unresolved guilt, abandonment, or years of silent struggle. And from there, when trust is built, we may gently lead them back to light, to faith, to healing.

But we must start not with answers—but with heart. So maybe the question we should ask ourselves is not, “What should I say?” but rather,
“Am I the kind of friend someone can open up to without fear of being judged or ignored?”

Because in a world full of noise, sometimes the greatest gift we can offer is not our advice, but our quiet presence.

Let’s choose to listen more.
To be more gentle with others.
To check in even when someone seems okay.
To be a bridge—not a barrier—back to hope.

We may not carry the title of counselor, psychologist, or pastor,
but with a listening heart and a soul that cares we might just help save a life.

~Nodz

Photo by Göksu Taymaz: https://www.pexels.com/photo/woman-standing-on-footbridge-26892608/
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Forever Young

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Early this morning, I woke up to the sound of a familiar song. I was gently singing along – filling the house with the beautiful melody and lyrics of “Forever Young,” as performed by Music Travel Love and our very own Bugoy Drilon. It was stunning. Beyond the lyrics, the song carries a deeper meaning. In a world where time never stops ticking, the idea of staying forever young continues to capture our imagination. Whether it’s the smooth, wrinkle-free face in the mirror, the carefree joy of youth, or the fearless spirit to dream – being “forever young” isn’t just about age. It’s about holding on to the parts of ourselves that time can never take away. It does speak to a longing – not just for youth, but for the dreams, wishes, and pure feelings that often live deep in our hearts, even as we grow older. We all have that one dream – maybe it’s out of reach, maybe it’s beyond our control —-but still, there’s a quiet voice inside us that whispers, “It will happen.”

Now that I’m in a more reflective chapter of my life, age has given me a different lens – one that looks back with understanding and forward with quiet hope. Life has taken me through many seasons – each with its own set of challenges and moments that quietly molded me into who I’ve become. I’ve met all kinds of people over the years – as many as the different brands of shampoo I’ve tried, haha. Life has been a journey – like a long road trip filled with smooth highways, sudden turns, and bumpy roads. Along the way, I’ve  met these people who were like unexpected stops or passengers for a time. Some offered comfort, some tested my patience, and others showed me truths I wasn’t ready to see. Much like that one rainy drive where I could barely see the road, it was the presence of someone beside me – my husband’s steady eyes – that reminded me I didn’t have to navigate alone. The people we meet over the years may not stay for the whole ride, but they leave behind lessons that quietly shape how we drive forward. And through all of it, life has offered me chances to grow – opportunities to become a better version of myself. The experiences I’ve been through have shaped not just how I see the world, but how I respond to it. They’ve helped shift my outlook, soften my perspective, and taught me how to inject calm, grace, and understanding into the way I handle life’s many scenarios.

I may not have become wildly successful, wealthy, or recognized in a big career — the way society often measures worth. People may look at others and place them on a higher edge. But I’ve dared to try, to take risks, and to test my own limits. And in doing so, I discovered parts of myself I wouldn’t have known otherwise. That, in itself, is a kind of success I quietly carry with pride.

And maybe that’s what being “FOREVER YOUNG” truly means — not the absence of wrinkles or the number of candles on a cake, but the courage to keep growing, the openness to keep learning, and the heart to keep dreaming. Though life has taken me through storms, detours, and quiet stretches of road, I still carry that spark — that tiny voice that whispers, “It will happen.”

I may not have it all, but I have lived, tried, felt, failed, loved, and learned. And in that, I remain forever young — not in years, but in spirit.

HOW ABOUT YOU?  WHAT DOES ” FOREVER YOUNG” MEAN TO YOU ?

~Nodz

Photo by syd.trgt ✪: https://www.pexels.com/photo/serene-lavender-field-at-sunset-with-lone-tree-32482605/
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New Light:  A Shepherd for Our Time

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Photo by cottonbro studio

In life, we often hold tightly to our own desires and choices—each one shaped by our beliefs, experiences, and personal principles. We tend to follow what makes sense to us, what feels right in our own understanding. But there are moments when God leads us in directions that challenge those very beliefs. He allows situations—or calls certain people—that don’t always align with what we expected or preferred.

In such moments, we are reminded that His wisdom far exceeds our own. God’s plans are not limited by human perspective. What matters most is not whether something fits our ideals, but whether it fulfills His greater purpose. Surrendering our will—especially when things don’t make full sense—is an act of deep trust. Because when God moves, even through unexpected means or people, it is always for a reason… and always for a greater good.

Now, we have a newly elected Pope ‐An American by birth, Pope Leo XIV  formerly Cardinal Robert Francis Prevost – May God’s light surround him and His hand guide every step he takes. As expected, some responded with joy, others with questions or concerns. But in this sacred and significant decision, we must not forget: the ultimate choice belongs to the Lord. He sees beyond qualifications, beyond borders, beyond what the world sees. His ways may not always match our expectations, but His purpose is always perfect.

God always works with a deeper purpose—often in ways we do not see or expect. There is a divine reason behind His choice of a particular person. In the midst of everything happening in the world today, God sees who is truly worthy to be His instrument of light. His eyes are always fixed on where His guidance is most needed. He sees what we cannot. He scans the earth not with judgment, but with love and intention. And when the moment comes, He equips the willing, strengthens the humble, and sends forth His light through human vessels.

~Nodz

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Forever Six, Forever Loved

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Today would have been my son’s 18th birthday. I can’t help but wonder how he would look now, all grown up. He was only six when he left us. It was a tragic loss — he had been fighting an illness since he was just two years old. Looking back, I can hardly imagine how we lived through those years, but I won’t dwell on the pain or the details. What I want to hold onto are the moments that revealed the kindness and beauty of his heart.

He was such a bubbly child, so full of spirit and strength. Despite countless hospital stays and treatments, he never once gave up — never even complained. His heart was always open to others. He adored babies and children. He had this rare friendliness that drew even adults in. And his smile — oh, that unforgettable smile — it had a magic all its own. Friends would often say his smile could melt hearts and calm even the stormiest emotions. It wasn’t just a smile; it reflected the kindness, compassion, and hope that lived within him. His smile could brighten a dark room and add color to the grayest of days.

I remember once, when he was only three, we were at a mall. He noticed an elderly man sitting alone on a bench, looking sad. Without saying a word, he walked over, sat beside him, and simply smiled. The man, surprised and touched, embraced him. Moments like that were so natural for him.

Even when he wasn’t feeling well himself, he would wave and smile at people around him. I recall a time when we rushed him to the ER — instead of worrying about himself, he was more concerned about the other children who were crying. He even asked us to give his water to another child.

Another memory stays close to my heart — while he was admitted to the hospital, the child in the next bed was restless and upset. My son told us to offer his toys to the little one and even asked if we could buy more for him.

And there was a day, while walking along the road, he saw street children. Without hesitation, he asked us if we could buy them shoes.

One of the moments I cherish the most happened during his last week with us. We were at the dental clinic, and as I sat on the chair, he walked over, placed his small hand on my chest, and whispered, “It’s alright, Mom, no crying.” I wasn’t crying then, but those words carried a deeper meaning — as if he was telling me to stay strong, to be brave, and not to worry. It was his way of comforting me, even in the face of his own silent struggle.

His time with us was short, but his love, kindness and bravery stretched far beyond his years. Today, as I remember him, I hold onto those moments — the ones that remind me that even a brief life can shine brighter than a lifetime.

He was only six, but he taught me lessons that will last a lifetime. Happy birthday in Heaven, my sweet boy — your light will never fade.

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“A Smile That Stays”

You were a light too bright for time,
A fleeting sun that chose to climb.
Though years were few, your love was vast,
A gentle heart, built to outlast.

Your smile, a balm for aching souls,
A spark of hope that quietly glows.
In every tear, in every song,
Your kindness whispers all along.

Though I can’t hold you, hear your voice,
Your memory leaves me no other choice —
But to live with grace, as you showed me how,
A child so brave, an angel now.

So on this day, I send my love,
To where you shine, beyond, above.
And carry you, both near and far,
My forever child, my brightest star.

~Mom Nodz~

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Life and Movies

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I’ve been binge-watching Netflix to pass the time and ease boredom. I randomly picked three movies: Like Father, Life List, and Senior Year. Movies often serve as an escape, a way to unwind after a long day. But the ones with deeper stories offer us something more—they teach us valuable lessons. Happy endings leave us feeling uplifted, while sad ones can linger, affecting our mood. It’s a testament to how deeply we invest our emotions in the stories we watch. When a story unfolds differently from what we hoped for, it stays with us long after the credits roll.

How does this relate to real life? Well, just like in movies, not everything goes as we expect. Happy moments uplift us, while disappointments can linger and shape our emotions. We often invest in people, dreams, and situations, only to face outcomes different from what we envisioned. However, just as every movie—whether happy or sad—teaches us something, life’s unexpected twists shape us, helping us grow, learn, and find meaning in every experience.

I am grateful for the things I have accomplished and for the opportunities I continue to pursue, shaping me into a better version of myself each day. Growth is an ongoing journey, and learning never stops. God has given me experiences to learn from, and He continues to do so in new and different ways. The sad and frustrating part is that this “different way” God is leading me isn’t what I had hoped for. There are still so many things I wish I could do, but given my current circumstances, it feels impossible to turn them into reality. It’s a challenge to keep moving forward—not with the plans I once dreamed of, but with what aligns with the resources and circumstances I have now. Have you ever experienced something similar in your life?

Whenever I feel frustrated, I watch movies or read. Somehow, I find answers or guidance that help me figure out how to handle things. The movies I’ve watched recently have given me a clearer sense of what I can do, but it’s not as straightforward as it seems. The emotions we experience in the midst of dilemmas can be significant barriers, and sometimes, the options available feel limited.

For the past 20 years, my life has primarily focused on myself and my family. We’ve shared dreams and planned for the future together. Taking care of aging parents was never part of that vision, and I always trusted that the future, along with God’s guidance, would take care of it. My relationship with my mother has never been particularly close—she has a different way of handling things, and we’ve never had deep, meaningful conversations about life. Our principles and outlooks differ greatly, making it difficult to connect.

Now that we’re caring for her, I feel tied down, with little freedom to pursue my own desires or dreams. I wake up each morning feeling the weight of this new reality. It feels like a burden, like I’m trapped in a life I didn’t choose. Instead of following the plans I once envisioned, I find myself constantly adjusting to her needs and demands. It’s not easy, and honestly, I don’t know when or how I’ll come to terms with it.

I wish life were like the movies, where everything eventually falls into place and happy endings are guaranteed. But life isn’t a script we can rewrite—it’s unpredictable, and we don’t always get the outcomes we hope for. Still, movies remind us that even when things don’t go as planned, we can find ways to move forward. They give us glimpses of resilience, of people finding meaning in their struggles, even if the journey is messy.

Maybe that’s what I’m trying to do—navigate this unscripted life, figuring things out as I go. It’s not easy, and there’s no perfect resolution waiting at the end of the credits. But like in movies, maybe there’s still something to learn along the way.

~Nodz

Photo credit to:  Darya Sannikova: https://www.pexels.com/photo/focused-young-female-filming-video-blog-on-camera-5675247/
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Stepping Away To Find My Peace

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When Facebook began, it was all about excitement and genuine connection. We eagerly reconnected with loved ones, shared moments, and enjoyed its simplicity. But over time, it changed—what was once a space for meaningful interactions slowly turned into a stage for validation, curated lives, and competition. Authenticity faded, replaced by the pressure to impress rather than connect.

Facebook used to be my sanctuary—a place where I could express my thoughts, share updates, and post photos of my life. It felt comforting, especially when friends reacted and engaged. In a way, it helped me feel connected. But as the years passed, I began feeling uneasy whenever I posted, even about simple things like where I went or what I did. I also noticed how people shared details that should remain private, often with little discretion. It made me wonder—are they truly celebrating, or is it just an attempt to share their experiences with the world?

Some use their posts to express emotions and personal struggles, turning them into long, emotionally charged threads. While this can be a way to find support, it sometimes feels overwhelming. I remember deactivating my account multiple times, missing the people on my friends list, only to reactivate it and post again—only to feel that same uneasiness. Certain posts—whether excessive sharing or strong opinions—often made me reflect on how I was engaging with the platform. Over time, I realized that constantly consuming content that didn’t align with my priorities wasn’t beneficial for me.

Facebook remains a valuable tool for many—it connects families, helps businesses grow, and provides a platform for important discussions. But personally, I found that stepping away from the constant stream of updates gave me clarity and peace. My priorities shifted—I now find joy in living a low-key life. Instead of seeking validation, I choose to share my thoughts and reflections in a more intentional space: my personal blog, where like-minded people can connect. No pressure to impress, no need for external validation—just authenticity and peace.

I feel lighter now. Friends can still reach me through private messages and chat groups, which feels much more personal. This isn’t isolation—it’s a way to find peace and focus on personal growth in a way that feels right for me.

~Nodz


Photo credit : Göksu Taymaz: https://www.pexels.com/photo/woman-standing-on-footbridge-26892608/
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Mindset

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(Strengthening Our Attitude)

“This image contains an excerpt from Charles R. Swindoll’s book Strengthening Your Grip (p. 239). Shared here for reflection and inspiration. All rights belong to the author and publisher.”

I’ve had this book for years- “STRENGTHENING YOUR GRIP” by CHARLES  SWINDOLL  and it remains my favorite to read. No matter how many times I go through it, it never gets old—it serves as a constant reminder for me. Let me share my  reflection on maintaining a strong attitude.

Every day is a battle; we face challenges and encounter people who sometimes push us to our limits. Taking care of my elderly mother now is a huge transition after being apart for over a decade—so much has changed. But through it all, I’ve learned a lot from being on my own, continuously teaching myself how to improve and adapt to the circumstances I face each day. My days with my mother are now filled with her stories and conversations—some meaningful, others not so much, and at times even gossip and lingering grudges, she has hold onto them for years. I’m reflecting on what shapes these perceptions and attitudes in general, aside from the specific reasons that made her this way.

I first think about the environment we live in, the people around us, and the challenges we face daily. We often attribute who we become to these factors, placing the blame on them. This is often the usual justification—we all fall into it at times, myself included. But as I always say, daily self-reflection can help us learn, grow, and rise daily challenges. Life is like a bed of roses—beautiful, yet full of thorns. There’s always something to admire, but there are also moments that sting. These are the  experiences that shape and mold us, influencing our outlook, perceptions, and the way we think. How can we strengthen our grip on our attitudes and regain self-control whenever we falter? Not everyone has access to inspirational books, and not everyone enjoys reading. Some people may not like talking or listening when wisdom is shared. But one simple and valuable practice that anyone can learn and teach themselves is PRAYER.  Speaking to God as if He is right in front of us—simply asking for guidance in our thoughts, words, patience, and attitude.  The way we say it doesn’t matter—God listens. 

Just slipping this in—while I was writing this, I suddenly heard the sound of glass breaking. Mama just broke a glass from my limited-edition COKE collection—the only one I had left. I really loved this glass <sigh>. Trying to describe how I feel right now… and funny enough, my topic today reminds me—oops, hey hey… well.  I’ve put together some practices to help strengthen our attitude and being aware.

1. Reflect – Understand your thoughts, emotions, and triggers.

2. Be Mindful – Pause before reacting impulsively.

3. Reframe Negativity – Turn setbacks into learning opportunities.

4. Stay Disciplined – Build resilience through daily habits.

5. Choose Positivity – Surround yourself with uplifting influences.

6. Embrace Imperfection – Learn from mistakes instead of dwelling on them.

With effort, we can improve our mindset and emotional control.

~Nodz

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Young Wisdom

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I stayed two months in my hometown due to a family obligation, but it was also a chance to reconnect with old friends and relatives for the holidays. While it was heartwarming to catch up, I couldn’t shake a sense of unease.  Two decades away have significantly altered my perspective in life. The familiar surroundings and interactions felt both comforting and disorienting, as I struggled to reconcile my past with my present self. I felt overwhelmed by the pressure to conform. How can I maintain my identity without sacrificing my values and beliefs? It’s really  a challenging experience to be so far removed from your roots. My love and  care for everyone close to me here has not changed. It’s just that in life, we need to change to improve ourselves in dealing with life and situations, how would we respond. I hate that I’m facing with this dilemma. I’ve moved on, but my roots are still firmly planted, tugging at me to return.

From a simple “How are you now?”, from a close relative younger than me, she meant something else – “as a person” ( I was amazed by her ability to think and ask such insightful question ) this was during a casual conversation, it made me truly reflect on myself. It wasn’t just a casual question; it prompted me to delve deeper into my own well-being and consider how I’m truly doing at present, both physically and emotionally. It’s been a period of immense change since I left my hometown almost twenty years ago. Now, back for a two-month stay, I’m grappling with the unfamiliar yet familiar landscape, and the unfamiliar yet familiar version of myself. Is it possible to maintain harmonious and positive relationships with familiar people while still expressing our own views, even when they differ, or does conformity inevitably require the suppression of individual perspectives? 

A recent conversation with the same person again prompted another realization I had previously overlooked. She posed a different question now ‘Are you missing Manila already?’ This led me to delve deeper. I’ve considered this place my home for two decades, and I realized that what I miss most are the aspects of this place that had shaped me into the person I am today, particularly the sense of peace I once experienced. I’ll be going back home in a few days back in Manila, returning to reality and my usual routine. It feels like I’m shifting back into place, and  a sense of relief washing over me as I anticipate being myself again. I believe God has a plan for me, guiding me to adapt and thrive in different environments and with diverse people. This journey of life involves embracing the ever-changing landscape, connecting with others authentically while staying true to myself. It’s undoubtedly challenging, but with patience and perseverance, I can learn to celebrate each step of this evolving experience.

~Nodz

A snapshot of the place where I had a conversation that led to profound realizations

A BLESSED 2025 TO EVERYONE ❤️🙏⚘️

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Blurred Lines: Decoding Right and Wrong in Modern Politics

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It seems normal nowadays to think that right is being made wrong and wrong is being made right, especially in politics or even in our own lives. For this reason, it’s hard to determine what’s truly right or wrong in today’s political climate and how issues are presented and discussed. Politicians might emphasize certain facts while downplaying others to make their actions seem more acceptable, and persuasive language can sway opinions. The rapid spread of information by the media can also make it difficult to get a clear view. To truly understand what’s going on, it’s important to think critically and consider different perspectives.

It’s similar to the idea of buying a book that solves 50% of a problem; buying two copies to cover the whole problem (humorously accurate) this doesn’t work, right? because both books have the same content. In politics, information or arguments are sometimes presented as if they cover everything, but they don’t always provide the full picture. It’s essential to consider various viewpoints to get a clearer understanding of the situation. We have the ability to distinguish right from wrong, but we must ensure that we’re not blinded by our emotions or beliefs. Our personal biases shouldn’t dictate what we choose to believe.

~Nodz

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CAN ONE EXUDE HIGH-CLASS STYLE WITHOUT WEALTH?

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It’s coffee time after church, our favorite hangout spot.  (Apologies for the brief lapse in etiquette; I promptly removed my bag from the table after ) 

This food chain is conveniently located at the corner of our village, making it a cost-saving choice with just a quick turn from home.  Well, my eyes unintentionally became intrigued as someone entered, carrying a bag—my dream bag, a Bottega Veneta, hehehe. That lady appears sophisticated yet approachable. What I mean by approachable? She exudes true class. Out of the blue, I thought of writing an article about it.

Can you embody elegance and sophistication without relying on wealth or material possessions?  🤔 We frequently confuse wealth with class, assuming that having money automatically equates to being high class. NOPE 😉 being high class involves more than just financial status. It encompasses qualities such as grace, manners, cultural awareness, and a sense of dignity. One instance, one lady entering a resto with an authentic Chanel bag and an outfit that whispers “luxury.” All eyes are on her, including you. She sat at an empty table, getting ready to order, when suddenly a waiter passed by and accidentally spilled water on her. The lady suddenly yells at him, saying, “What the fuck are you doing?” How would you characterize that woman’s reaction? Another scenario, you accidentally bumps a person in a crowded hallway, how will you react? Will you react with anger or annoyance or calmly apologize and ask if the other person is okay. Another scenario again, you’re the driver on a road trip with friends, and unexpectedly encounter heavy traffic that delays your journey. How would you choose to behave in that situation? Would you react impatiently and burst out? Despite feeling annoyed and stressed about the delay, you take a deep breath, maintain composure, and reassure your passengers that you’ll navigate through the traffic smoothly while prioritizing safety and comfort. You see, class isn’t about the money in your bank account; it’s about your character, values, and how you treat others.

Let’s begin behaving with true class, even if our bags don’t scream luxury and our outfits don’t flaunt wealth. Being classy isn’t just about the material things, although everyone appreciates quality luxury bags and expensive stylish outfits if they can afford them. What truly matters is how we uphold our manners, values, and actions towards others.

~Nodz

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Which Way …

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The balance between being kind and assertive while respecting your own limitations and priorities.

Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you’re torn between being kind and saying no to a request because you need to prioritize your own limitations and commitments? Is it more appropriate to yield to others’ wishes to avoid being seen negatively, or to assert your rights to protect your boundaries and prioritize your limitations?

From a spiritual standpoint, the foundation should be sacrificial love—loving one another unconditionally and serving people with compassion. On a psychological basis, the foundation should be establishing healthy boundaries, practicing assertiveness, and prioritizing self-care to maintain emotional well-being. Among these two basis, what should be the fundamental criteria for being considered human and good? If refusing, asserting our boundaries, and prioritizing self-care are labeled as selfish, then agreeing and compliance perhaps are described as self-sacrificing or accommodating, we are good human then. How about this- we agree outwardly but feeling burdened internally, we feel conflicted, it’s not right. For this can lead to stress, resentment, and ultimately, negative consequences for our mental health and relationships.

So which is which?  Which option is the most beneficial: prioritizing actions based on spiritual principles or focusing on psychological well-being? This is a dilemma that many of us might encounter at some point in our lives, wherein a situation where we must choose between two conflicting options, both of which have their own merits and implications. This is something to think about… I need to think about .. a personal dilemma I am grappling with these days.

~Nodz

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Exploring the Contrast: Goodness vs. Kindness

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Let’s explore the idea of goodness versus kindness. Is there any differences between this two?

A good person involves possessing behaviors, such as honesty, integrity, empathy, respect, and fairness, adhering to moral and ethical principles, with a focus on doing the right thing in both actions and intentions.

Kindness, on the other hand, is a specific behavior that reflects compassion and empathy towards others. It involves treating others with warmth, consideration, and generosity. Kindness can be expressed through small acts of goodwill, such as helping someone in need, offering a kind word, or showing empathy towards others’ struggles.

If we analyze it closely, there are differences between the two.
Being a good person goes beyond just being kind. It encompasses a broader set of values and virtues that guide one’s overall character and behavior.

I want to share an experience, 20 years ago, when we moved here where we live now. I had my first job. Everything is different compared to the province when it comes to lifestyles, characters and work attitudes. When you live in a big city, behaviors are a bit more aggressive and assertive due to the fast pace of life, I think. As someone from the province, I was more quiet and humble in such ways. I experienced bullying, which I thought only happened in elementary, highschool or college, but even in the workplace among professionals, it occurred as well. I won’t go into further details, but it really affected me emotionally. No retaliation on my part, it’s not my nature, but I wish I had been more assertive. The emotional impact was intense. It turns out, age doesn’t shield you from feeling down. I remained kind, but it didn’t help me feel better. This is the downside of kindness -being vulnerable to exploitation by others. Lack of assertiveness-we prioritize avoiding conflict or displeasing others over expressing our own needs or opinions, resulting in difficulties standing up for oneself. Another downside is expecting others to reciprocate in the same manner, although not everyone may have the same level of kindness. Lastly, excessive kindness leads to losing boundaries, causing others to lose respect for you.

Here, I see the big difference between being nice and being truly good. One can be nice without being genuinely good. What should we focus on developing? Goodness, which includes morals like RESPECT, EMPATHY, INTEGRITY, AND FAIRNESS. A good person aims to do what’s right, not just in actions but also in thoughts and intentions. This naturally leads to kindness which is always guided by morals and values. But being a good person can be challenging at times because it often requires making sacrifices, overcoming selfish desires, and constantly striving to do what’s right, even when it’s not easy and when you need to make choices in difficult situations and navigate complex relationships with those around us.

~Nodz

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What should comes first ,”Thinking or Feeling?”

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In our daily lives, we revolve around what’s happening. We dissect them, leading to decisions. We think, reflect, weigh the pros and cons, then suddenly our feelings come into play, unconsciously dictating, whispering “what if” and “but.” Should we listen to them? 

Often, our decisions are swayed by preferences,  what we like or dislike causing our rationality to fade as our emotions take the lead, shaping our lives. We are drawn to what may be harmful while shying away from what could be beneficial. Rather than prioritizing what is objectively true and good, we justify our choices based on this personal likes and dislikes. We opt for what’s more enjoyable, enticing, and resonates with us because that’s what we feel, although sometimes it can have negative consequences on the flip side.

Some instances- 

*As we grow older, we often find ourselves needing to follow a strict diet to improve our health, but when temptations wave, ouch! We pass by a resto with our favorite pasta, we will start to crave, finding ourselves justifying giving in to our desires, ignoring the rationality of sticking to our diet plan, we may often say, ” Just this once, I don’t want to deprive myself forever. After all, we only live once, whatever happens let it be.”.  What happens now? Our feelings take our intellect hostage, we find ourselves  now inside the resto enjoying the meal.

*Another scenario, in a relationship,  we’ve been friends with someone for over a decade, sharing countless memories and experiences together. However, recently we’ve noticed some troubling behavior patterns, it no longer resonates our values anymore. We find ourselves torn between the years of friendship we’ve built, but moving forward together doesn’t seem feasible anymore. Our feelings dictates over our intellect  what should be done.

God gave us intellect to contemplate things over our emotions, to make decisions, to assess. Just like in the story of Adam and Eve, Eve was tempted to eat the apple; she succumbed to her desires instead of following God’s instructions. As human,  it’s common for our emotions to overshadow our intellect, leading us to prioritize feelings over rationality. It’s a common human dilemma. We all just simply need  God’s guidance to navigate through all our emotions for us to think what’s right.

~ Nodz

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FORGIVENESS

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I came across someone’s quote that resonated with me: “Choosing not to speak to someone after forgiving them silently is a form of self-care.” It made me reflect on my own realizations.

If we directly analyze this phrase, it holds true for some of us, INCLUDING MYSELF, honestly. If we aim to establish boundaries and distance ourselves from those who have caused us pain, and for what reasons, such as to heal, move forward, and let go of everything, including that individual, this is the approach we take for self-care, as we perceive it. But is avoidance truly an act of self-care? If we consider it from another perspective, that strategy won’t prove effective. The most unpleasant memories in our lives don’t simply vanish from our minds, especially when they have inflicted significant pain and involve another person. They persist, catching us off guard when we least expect it. We refer to this phenomenon as a flashback, a recurring presence that will continue to haunt us indefinitely.

Without our awareness, we may not have truly forgiven them, despite what we may have believed. Choosing not to engage with them serves as a form of avoidance, offering only temporary peace. There will inevitably come a day when we unexpectedly face them. What will we do then? The past will stir within us once more, despite our efforts to establish boundaries, and we’ll find ourselves reliving the pain, perhaps even more intensely, realizing it has morphed into resentment. Each day brings new realizations in our lives, fostering personal growth, particularly as we seek guidance from  God. Spiritually, we nourish ourselves each day, we will be guided.

Let’s rephrase the quote –

Forgiving people with an open heart, being willing to address and discuss issues if given the opportunity, is the best form of self-care. This way, peace isn’t just temporary but lasts a lifetime.

~Nodz

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Emotions Over Intellect

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When emotions clash with our intellect, it becomes confusing. It’s  my routine every morning to listen to a podcast, focusing on God’s verses and teachings to guide me throughout the day and meditations. Without this guidance, it feels incomplete and challenging to face the day. Do you have a morning routine that serves as your guide for the day?  I’ll share what I listened to, which coincidentally aligned with the reminders from yesterday and will influence my decisions today.

Last night, I was supposed to declutter and organize my belongings, something I’ve been putting off for days. During the pandemic, stuck at home and feeling bored, I found myself indulging in online shops, not excessively or expensively. However, it accumulated over time. Compounded by my habit before the pandemic when I was still running a business, due to excessive stress and fatigue most of the time, going to mall was my outlet and buying things out of stress, were my way of  releasing the feeling.

Last night, I struggled to let go of  my certain stuff, feeling weighed down, just like losing loved ones and needed to move on. I postponed the task, rationalizing it as heavy, though my intellect tells me it’s necessary to sell or donate to lessen the clutter. Similar dilemma of a friend , struggling with her new job, stressed by their coworkers’ attitudes, and contemplating resignation. But then what, will start from scratch, job hunting all over again. It’s a clash between emotions and rational thinking, sometimes we need to take the challenge to be able to grow and learn.

This morning, God’s guidance became evident amidst these confusions and weaknesses. It reminded me that in times like these, we need mental prayers to navigate our feelings versus our intellect. Sometimes, our emotions lead us astray, and we tend to favor them over what we should logically consider in a situation. My point is, day by day, we need prayers to prompt our right actions and transform our feelings to align with our rational thinking. Feelings can really be deceiving, almost like gossip. We’re tempted to talk about people we dislike to others because those are our feelings, the things we don’t like about them, but if we use our minds, on the other hand, we realize that the person we dislike for trivial reasons hasn’t really done anything wrong to us. So, this is where our thinking adjusts our feelings. We all need to have a mental prayer, seeking God’s guidance each day.

~Nodz

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Women

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Your every heartbeat that speaks deep Love,
etched  with benevolence and real strength.
Incomparable, blessed, true gift from above,
patience is endless, to measure the length.

~Nodz

In celebration of International Women’s day, this is to recognize all women as pillars of strength for their families, communities and country. May God bless each of one of us, as we continue to serve as the “light.”

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I AM

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In the realm of ordinary, I dwell, no tales of joy, no victories to tell. Just pain and failures, my constant plight, no unique routines in my daily light.

No grand adventures, no feats to boast, in the sea of mundanity, I am but a ghost. No remarkable stories, no fame to claim, just the echoes of sorrow, my silent name.

In the whispers of the wind, I fade, a forgotten soul, in the shadows, laid. No significance, no importance, I see, just a hollow vessel, without destiny.

In the tapestry of life, I’m but a thread, unnoticed, unseen, as the world spreads. No value, no worth, in anyone’s sight, just a fleeting moment, lost in the night.

In there, in the realm so high, you soar with grace, touching the sky. While down here, in the earth’s embrace, I stand humbly, in a quieter space.

You reside in the lofty heights, While I linger beneath in earthly sights. You are up there as I see , I am down here  below lost in the shadow.  For you I am worthless.

~Nodz

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Proactive or Reactive

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Are you proactive or reactive?  When problems or issues arise, do you focus on the cause or the details of the situation? Do you get angry or annoyed, blaming others, ranting immediately, or do you stay calm, looking at the issue as a whole, dissecting it, searching for solutions to solve ?

In our daily lives, many events or incidents sometimes cause stress or loss of motivation. We tend to get angry quickly, annoyed, reacting with should haves and could haves. Isn’t it better to seek solutions, think, and try to stay calm?

Looking back when I used to handle a family food business in a mall, I had workers to manage who worked shift hours. Due to  different personalities and work styles, there were often misunderstandings that led to arguments. As the owner, I couldn’t avoid feeling stressed and annoyed. I would investigate to see who was at fault, normally, this is the first thing anyone will do. Ensuring fair and effective resolution of every issue among my workers, prioritizing solutions, was always my focus. I always aimed to keep a peaceful workplace and help the business thrive. I always tell them, whether it’s work-related or personal issues, they should remember to stay calm. Seeking a solution should always be the approach. Hoping that wherever they are now, living their own lives, they carry all my advice with them, whether it’s regarding themselves, family issues, or other relationships. Seek solutions that helps peace of mind and lighten the burden.

~Nodz

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STRENGTH AND HOPE

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I got a beautiful quote from a character in a Netflix series “Snowpiercer”( still in the process of finishing the series ❤️).

“THE  WEAKEST ARE  THOSE WHO SUFFER FROM MEMORIES, THE STRONGEST CARRY  THE PAST LIKE FUEL TO IGNITE A PATH FORWARD.”

What does this mean?  People who are held back by their past experiences and memories often find it difficult to move forward, whereas those who are strongest are able to use their past as a source of motivation to drive themselves forward. Whenever we had dark experiences from the past, like for instance a tragedy , something that wounds us to the core. This compels us to experience a sense of despair, we find ourselves trapped in a pit. But if we possess the strength to confront our past experiences, advancing forward becomes much simpler.

During the first phase of the pandemic, many perished unexpectedly, losing children, siblings, or even parents just like that. It was extremely difficult, with no certainty in anything. Businesses and jobs were lost. Everyone was stressed. Some of us still carry what happened, the loved ones we’ve lost. When we think about it, we feel weak, questioning what more there is to continue for when they’re no longer here. We must remain resilient, cling to our faith in God, and continue pressing forward.

Just as I did when we lost our youngest , we fought tirelessly to extend his life, never ceasing in our quest for a cure for his illness. I even sought help from a hospital in the US specializing in rare disease. Very grateful for this doctor in that hospital who didn’t hesitate to help, whenever I needed some answers, he was there, assisting and to those friends I’ve met, they know who they are, who helped me, I could gain access to the information I needed. Still, despite our efforts, we still lost our youngest in the end, God  truly knows; His will always prevails for good. Nevertheless, we accepted it and found the strength to move forward. I continue to push forward, living a normal life despite the deep scars of our past. Though it occasionally haunts me, us- I constantly remind myself of the importance of cherishing life.

Again,
“The weakest are those who suffer from memories , the strongest  carry the past like fuel to ignite  a path forward.” -Snowpiercer

*WHAT A BEAUTIFUL QUOTE, ISN’T IT?

~Nodz

Photo credit: by Alfo Medeiros: https://www.pexels.com/photo/lighted-torch-in-close-up-shot-13169561/

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My Dearest You

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In, quietude, my gaze persists,
love concealed in silent mists.

From afar, where shadows play,
In silence my heart will stay.

In the wind my love takes flight,
wishing you joy, day and night.

I will watch you from afar in silence ,
My love enduring, timeless..

~Nodz

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THERE’S NO PLACE LIKE HOME

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HOME …
What does HOME mean to you? What’s your perspective on it? Is home defined by where you were born, raised, educated, completed studies, had your first job, and started a family? It serves as the foundation for all of us.

Twenty years ago, my family relocated to another city-Manila. The process was swift, emotionally unprepared, and I struggled to adapt to a life different from what I was accustomed to. Adjusting to the new environment, people, and community was challenging, but I faced it head-on. Over time, I became accustomed to the lifestyle, overcoming obstacles and embracing independence. Although I miss the support system of my hometown, I’ve learned to live on my own/ on our own. I’ve challenged myself, tried new things, and am grateful for the lessons learned here. Indeed, my outlook and perspective on things have transformed here and shaped me. I’ve grown to appreciate and love where I am now.

Yet, ponder the prospect that God may have an alternate plan, a unique purpose guiding me back to the place I called home 20 years ago. Another new challenges for which I may not be ready again? Individuals evolve, circumstances shift, and you’re uncertain about what awaits you in your old familiar places or who those once-familiar faces have become. I might be exaggerating or overanalyzing. Thinking about all of this brings tears to my eyes if I leave the place rather its about time to go from where I learned and survived.

From my standpoint, home is where I gained independence , navigated survival and witnessed the authentic reality of life. If given the choice, I would choose to live till my last breath, where my real strength emerged, where I developed as an individual, the place where I gained the knowledge to thrive in challenging situations. Ultimately, God’s plan prevails, and His purpose, though unseen, is undoubtedly good. Yielding to His divine plan, allowing it to lead me to the place where my heart finds its true home, we’ll see. Now, I grasp the profound meaning in the song “Manila Manila” by Hotdogs, despite the noise, heavy traffic, and crowds. Well, expensive to live, you’ve grown to love the place. Life here teaches you something different; it teaches you survival. It’s a kind of home that will be forever engraved in your heart.

//Nodz

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Coping With Overhelming Days: Finding Calm Amidst Chaos-

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Life can be tumultuous, and there are days when the world seems to conspire against us. The noise and chaos in our environment, coupled with personal challenges and unmet responsibilities, can leave us feeling overwhelmed. It’s during such times that we need to find ways to regain our composure, as it’s all too easy to let a bad day snowball into something more significant. We must reflect and learn in how to cope with overwhelming days.

Allow me to recount one challenging day I experienced. Once, I woke up to the sound of conversations about this family dispute and their arguments, while this family dispute doesn’t directly involve us, it does have an impact as it absorbs negativity. The burden of this situation can indeed have implications for one’s mental health, listening to such disputes have an impact, what we truly desire is simply peace, every single day. Moreover, within my obligations that day, I had this urgent text, requiring immediate attention and I couldn’t help but to worry. Additionallly , another very important thing which urgently needed to complete within the day. However, as the day unfolded, it became apparent that nothing significant actually occurred.

Overwhelming days are a part of life, and while they may seem insurmountable at times, it’s essential to remember that they are temporary. By recognizing our feelings, practicing mindfulness, and taking practical steps to regain control, we can effectively cope with the challenges of a bad day. These experiences can teach us resilience and the importance of self-care, ultimately helping us face future obstacles with greater strength and composure. Certainly, it is important to turn to prayer 🙏 whenever we experience overwhelming emotions ; pray for the people, for ourselves and the situation that involves.

“TRUE PEACE CAN ONLY BE ATTAINED THROUGH THE DIVINE GRACE OF GOD.“

-Nodz

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She

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In the vast abyss of darkness,
She find solace, where shadows dance, secrets find their place.

A loneliness and sorrow hid between the images’ face, in a loud screaming silence, a story to retrace.

Her dreams, distant, beyond earth’s reach they lie, she merely glimpse them from a distant light.

In solitude with music, matching its melody and rhythm, her divine. In heeding her heart’s words, she is fine.

You’ll discern her inner thoughts by gazing into her eyes. Her dreams stretch as vast as the skies.

Will someone reach out to clasp her hand, sense the yearning, feel the rain. Perhaps we will understand the depth of her dreams and pain.

~Nodz

Photo by luizclas/Pexels

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The Sunrise Repast (My profound love and existence)

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In a world of contrast, where colors collide. Differences entwine, side by side. Opposite souls, they somehow find, a harmony rare, the heart does bind.

Like puzzle pieces, they fit just right. In the tapestry of day and night, two worlds merging, becoming one. In the dance of life, their love has begun.

Through the storms and the gentle breeze. They navigate life’s unpredictable seas. Hand in hand, they conquer it all. Differences united, they stand tall.

Soulmates forged in the fires of fate, In love’s embrace, they celebrate. For when differences collide and combine, two souls as one, forever entwined.

Nodz

Amidst the ordinary sights, narratives and significance frequently unveil 😉 my breakfast today by the way ❤️

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In The Tranquil Embrace of God’s Peace

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In the hustle and bustle of today’s fast-paced world, finding moments of tranquility and inner peace has become a precious endeavor. Many individuals seek solace in various avenues, but one powerful and enduring way is by connecting with God through solitude.

Back in 2013 when we lost our little boy, we maintained a ritual, which I often refer to as a practice, of attending the Holy Eucharist every early Sunday at a Catholic Convent. The Carmel of Thérèse of Lisieux, I developed an affection for the stillness of this location, where it seems as though you’re in the presence of God every time you visit, sensing the possibility of healing within reach, calming the inner turmoil. During our most profound agony, we sought solace to alleviate the pain.

Amidst the pandemic, we found ourselves enveloped by fears and concerns that gave rise to anxiety. Personally, I went through the challenges and turmoil of anxiety. It proved to be quite a challenge, most churches were closed but fortunately, we discovered one church where we could visit, seek solace, embrace the quiet, and find respite for a brief period and I managed to handle my fears and worries.

In a world characterized by constant noise and distractions, the practice of finding peace alone with God holds immense significance. Through solitude, individuals can tap into the depths of their spiritual selves, fostering self-discovery, a deeper connection with God, and lasting inner peace. This journey towards finding solace in divine communion brings forth personal transformation, spiritual growth, and a renewed perspective on life’s challenges. As individuals continue to seek moments of solitude with their Creator, they embark on a path that leads to a harmonious and fulfilling existence.

Amid life’s noise, a tranquil retreat,
Alone with God, where solace meets.
A sacred hush, a soothing grace,
In His presence, I find my place.

A quiet realm, where worries cease,
God’s gentle peace, a sweet release.
Through whispered prayers, my soul’s aligned
In solitude, His love I find.

No need for words, just still embrace,
His calming touch, my heart’s own space.
The chaos fades,
His light shines through,
Alone with God, my spirit renews.

ALONE WITH GOD, A SACRED ART 🙏

His peace enwraps my weary heart.
Through every trial, every lease,
His presence brings a lasting peace.

In whispered winds and rustling leaves,
His whispers soft, my soul receives.
A sacred dance, a silent song,
In solitude, I truly belong.

~Nodz

Photo credit to: https://www.pexels.com/@shvetsa/

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Control and let go …

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Have you ever experienced a profound sense of disappointment in your life, where you wished that things had turned out differently or should have been a certain way? How did you confront the disappointment or what actions did you take in response to it?

Life is a complex tapestry of events, circumstances, and relationships, often filled with unpredictability and challenges. In the face of such complexity, it is easy to feel overwhelmed, helpless, and consumed by the things we cannot control. However, within this intricate web, there exists a liberating truth: the power to focus on what we can control and let go of what we cannot.

The human mind is naturally inclined to seek control and stability. We strive to mold our lives according to our desires and expectations, yearning for certainty and predictability. Yet, as life unfolds, we inevitably encounter situations and factors that lie beyond our reach. It is during these times that our ability to differentiate between what is within our control and what is not becomes crucial.

Focusing on what we can control is a powerful mindset that empowers us to shape our own lives. We have agency over our thoughts, attitudes, and actions. We can choose to cultivate positive thinking, develop healthy habits, and act in ways that align with our values. By directing our energy towards these controllable aspects, we create a ripple effect that can transform our lives and the lives of those around us. At the same time, it is essential to recognize and accept the existence of factors beyond our control. External circumstances, the actions of others, and unforeseen events often fall outside the realm of our influence. The weather may not cooperate with our plans, people may behave differently from our expectations, and global events may unfold in ways we cannot predict. By acknowledging these realities, we free ourselves from the burden of trying to manipulate outcomes that are simply not ours to determine.

Letting go of what we cannot control is not a sign of weakness or resignation; rather, it is an act of wisdom and self-preservation. It liberates us from the shackles of frustration, anxiety, and stress. It allows us to redirect our attention and energy towards what truly matters—the things we can influence and shape. By releasing our attachment to outcomes, we create space for acceptance, resilience, and inner peace. Cultivating this mindset requires conscious effort and practice. It involves developing self-awareness and recognizing when we are holding onto things beyond our control. It requires us to shift our focus from worrying about the uncontrollable to taking proactive steps towards the things we can influence. It demands patience and the willingness to surrender the need for constant certainty.

One valuable tool in this journey is the practice of mindfulness. By cultivating present-moment awareness and non-judgmental observation of our thoughts and emotions, we can detach ourselves from unhelpful narratives and break free from the grip of the uncontrollable. Mindfulness allows us to stay grounded in the present, appreciating the beauty and opportunities that surround us, rather than being consumed by concerns about the future or regrets about the past.

Ultimately, focusing on what we can control and letting go of what we can’t is a transformative approach to life. It empowers us to take charge of our own happiness, success, and well-being. It liberates us from the weight of trying to control the uncontrollable, freeing up mental and emotional space for growth and personal development. By embracing this mindset, we navigate life’s uncertainties with grace, resilience, and a renewed sense of purpose.

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Your soul …

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As we grow older, we start to become more aware of the world around us and our place in it. We begin to realize that our lives are not just about ourselves, but also about the impact we can make on others. We want to make a difference, to leave a positive mark on the world, and to help others in different ways. I opt to create articles that have the potential to create an impact, rooted in my personal beliefs and values.

No one’s life is perfect, neither my life, I make mistakes, I get upset even over small things, I get irritated, I sometimes explode. We all make mistakes, face challenges, and struggle with our own personal demons. However, it’s our response to these imperfections that truly defines us. We can choose to learn from our mistakes and grow from them, or we can let them consume us and hold us back. Our imperfections do not define us, but how we respond to them does.

My motivation for creating some impactful articles or poem is not driven by external validation or recognition. Rather, I am driven by my desire to share my emotions, what I have learned and realized. I understand that life is short, and I want to make the most of my time by contributing something meaningful to the world and to the people around me.

Making a difference in someone else’s life is an ongoing process, and we must be willing to learn from our mistakes, grow from our imperfections, and continue to act according to what we believe.

My soul feels alive when I make small contributions that have the potential to make a positive impact. How about you? What brings your soul to life?

~Nodz

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Friends from Afar …

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Friendships are essential components of human relationships. They are the support systems that make life bearable, enjoyable, and fulfilling. However, with the current trend of people moving away from their hometowns to pursue better opportunities or for other reasons, maintaining friendships has become challenging, particularly if the friends are now living in different cities.

It is a common occurrence that once people move away from their hometowns, their friendships start to drift apart. It is not that the friends no longer care for each other, but distance makes it hard to sustain the bond. The once-shared experiences and inside jokes begin to fade, and new experiences take their place. As a result, friends find themselves struggling to connect.

The situation is made even worse by the fact that as people get older, they tend to grow and change in different ways. One friend may take a different career path, while the other may start a family. These changes bring new challenges and responsibilities that take up time and energy, making it hard to keep in touch as often as they used to.

Another factor that contributes to the drift in friendships is the growth of the individuals involved. As people mature, they tend to outgrow some things that they used to enjoy, including some friendships. They may develop new interests and find themselves in new circles, making it harder to maintain the old relationships. This does not mean that they do not care about their old friends, but rather that their priorities and values have shifted.

When friendships start to drift apart, it is common for one party to become aloof. They may not respond to messages or calls as promptly as they used to, and when they do, the conversation may be brief and superficial. This behavior is often an indication that they have moved on and are no longer interested in the friendship. It is important to respect this and not force the issue.

Online communication tools such as social media, messaging apps, and video calls have made it easier to keep in touch with friends who live in different cities. However, these tools do not necessarily make friendships grow. They can help to maintain the bond, but they cannot replace the value of spending time with friends in person. Online communication lacks the intimacy, shared experiences, and human connection that come with physical interaction.

In conclusion, maintaining friendships can be challenging when friends live in different cities. The distance, changes in life circumstances, and personal growth can cause the relationship to drift apart. While online communication can help to maintain the bond, it cannot replace the value of physical interaction. It is essential to respect the changes that occur and not force the issue when a friendship is no longer working.



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Heart in hiding …

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The tears that fall, like a steady rain, Masking the hurt, the fear and the pain, the longing inside, too deep to explain,
…. my heart in hiding, a prisoner of shame.

I yearn to break free, to take a chance, but the fear inside, like a deadly dance, a constant battle, between heart and mind,
…. my heart in hiding, a love undefined.

The darkness surrounds me, like a cloak of despair, but still, I long for someone to share, the beauty inside, the love that I hold,
…..my heart in hiding, a story untold.

I reach for the light, but it slips through my grasp, the pain and the hurt, a weight that will last, the hope that I cling to, a flicker of flame,
…..my heart in hiding, still searching for the same.

One day, I know, I’ll find the key, to unlock the chains, and finally be free, to show the world, the love that I hold,
….my heart no longer in hiding, a story now told.

-nodz

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Her War

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Dark drifting clouds, distant sounds echoing, shadows lurking, silence was screaming, her heart was pounding.

Masking and hiding from burning pain memories, haunts, repeats and profusely colliding.

Nobody knows, no one cares, she chose not to be seen, fading into the background was her peace in between.

Her every day was a battle, confusions and deceptions were inevitable. Which road leads to answers. These are facts and inseparable.

What would be her armor of choice be? ..not to fight or fight the war within. Chasing God during tough times and keeping the faith and win.

~Nodz

Mental health should be taken seriously. Encouraging an individual, reaching out by listening with understanding and empathy, it can make a difference.

Image by: https://www.pexels.com/@ekrulila/

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Where’s the old smile gone…

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Used to be with simple things,
Watching the sun breaks and rises into day,
Staring at the moon that glows in its own way..

She never carries the loneliness she never had,
She reached out what’s pure, never thought of being sad,

Simple words and to listen were all she knew,
To be a shadow among the few.

She never imagined a picture fades over years
Or even a path lost in the middle of a maze.

Just a pen, a note, a song and a laugh
Nothing would ever go rough.

She looked over happiness as love within its reach,
She held hope as a dream and a wish.

But never expected the pain as big waves lash the shore,
All she wanted was to be loved, nothing more..

Still lost things at the end, time then was never been a friend
Yet she tried her best to mend, to pick up all the pieces but then

Season change, so as with her,
Tears may soon pass, she believed and from there,

She wanted to be remembered,
Not with the lost smile once she had,
But the old smile she once shared .

Nodz ~

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Remember This Day

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Voices starting to get unheard, we mourn,
selfishness and abuse of power manipulate and control.

Personal motives furnish with thorny scales,
pointed sharp spikes beneath the hearts and minds

Difficult to comprehend, the world must know,
this wall of raging flame between justice and fairness

Such power, not anyone could fight, fear rules,
All are helpless, cannot even defend one’s position

Rights and freedom ended, mark this day, be prepared,
 God says “Vengeance is mine I will repay”

~Nodz

 

I am grieving to what’s happening in our country today, our government shut down our largest TV Network, ABS-CBN, rejecting the license renewal. My bitter heart goes out to all thousand employees who will gonna lose jobs in the midst of pandemic crisis. God sees and hears. I am praying for people behind, they will be enlightened. Just heartless...

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Dark Valley

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Passing through a very deep dark valley,
walking barefoot along the lonely alley.
No lights, everything drenched in rain,
grieving heart screams in real pain.
Lost, seems there’s no God to look upon,
no arms to hold, lie awake till dawn.
Can’t quite  figure out why it’s happening
minds keep wandering, doubts aching.
No exact words to describe what’s inside
eyes will tell, we all need God’s light.

 

My heart cries for what is happening today,  I am praying for everyone. Let there be light, heal the world dear God.

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Light…

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Your light is my strength
Embracing this tears and fears
Hold me forever…

~Nodz

 

Photo Credit: Chad Mcdonald https://www.flickr.com/photos/mcdonald

 

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YOUR WIND

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Your wind here soothes me
Calms my aching heart and mind
You cleanse my being

~Nodz

 

Gloomy Friday with my cup of coffee, as I could hear the wind playing its own music, its a perfect time for me to write, get in touch with my  emotions and… continue my Udemy course online!   time spend alone can be some of the most productive time in our lives “I believe”… 

 

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My Little Space

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Missing you my little space, where my heart and thoughts collide,
Thinking If I can still write, please let me, even just a single line.

Sorry I detached myself then, shut my door, kept things under wrap,
Telling you,”I am fine”, putting my feelings safe, tightly strapped.

I thought I could leave, I was wrong, begging you, let me write more,
I can hear now, down inside this lost soul, a tiny voice starting to roar.

~Nodz