1687 – The first Huguenots set sail from France to the Cape of Good Hope. Does the name “du Toit” ring a bell?

1695 – A window tax is imposed in England, causing many householders to brick up windows to avoid the tax. Don’t give the ‘takers’ any ideas!

1759 – Arthur Guinness signs a 9,000 year lease at £45 per annum and starts brewing Guinness.

1805 – End of the French Republican calendar; France returns to Gregorian calendar like the rest of the civilized world. If you EVER want to see what happens when the Left takes control of government and implements all its “enlightened” ideals, study the French Revolution.

1879 – Thomas Edison demonstrates incandescent lighting to the public for the first time. 2012 – Incandescent bulbs are essentially outlawed by ignorant legislation.

1961 – The Marshall Plan expires after distributing more than $12 billion USD in foreign aid to rebuild Europe. Then we stayed there for the next thirty years making sure the commie hordes didn’t come take the place, and they treat US like crap!

1998– The European Exchange Rate Mechanism freezes the values of the legacy currencies in the Eurozone, and establishes the value of the euro currency. And right now, Europe is seriously reconsidering the wisdom of that move…

2007 – The Massive Big Dig construction project in Boston, Massachusetts ends as it starts filling itself in…

1066 – Granada massacre: A Muslim mob storms the royal palace spreading the gospel of the Religion of Peace in Granada, crucifies Jewish vizier Joseph ibn Naghrela and massacres most of the Jewish population of the city. “Religion of Peace”, yeah… Never was before. Isn’t now.

1817 – First coffee planted in Kona, Hawaii. Hawaiian Kona is still a GREAT coffee. Visit Smith Farms if you want to try some.

1853 – Gadsden Purchase: The United States buys land from Mexico to facilitate railroad building in the Southwest. 29,670 square miles for $10 million. Bought it fair and square. Bite that, Aztlan!

1854 – Pennsylvania Rock Oil Co., first oil company in the US is incorporated in NYC. “Rock Oil” = “petroleum”.

1906 – The All India Muslim League is founded in Dacca, East Bengal, British India Empire, which later laid down the foundations of Pakistan. Ambitious title, but “all India” didn’t want to be Muslim, not that such feelings have any bearing to radical Muslims…

1922 – The Union of Soviet Socialist Republics is formed. That’s good for about seventy years… And several million of its own people.

1953 – The first ever NTSC color television sets go on sale for about USD at $1,175 each from RCA. “NTSC” stands of “Never The Same Color”. And $1175 was a year’s worth of minimum wage in 1953.

1959 – USS George Washington, world’s first ballistic missile sub commissioned, resulting in numerous pants being shat in the Kremlin.

1980 – “Wonderful World of Disney,” last performance on NBC-TV , back when Disney was still VERY patriotic (you old f*rts remember “The Sons of Liberty”?) and very pro-science. Not like today when it’s very “let’s promote a few kiddie acts to the pre-pubescent crowd and make lots of money”.

1987 – Premier Mugabe elected president of Zimbabwe. He’s still there. Zimbabwe is almost gone, but Mugabe is still there.

2006 – Saddam Hussein is executed by hanging. “Justice” would have had him fed into a shredder, feet first.

2009 – The last roll of Kodachrome film is developed by Dwayne’s Photo, the only remaining Kodachrome processor at the time, concluding the film’s 74-year run as a photography icon. “Camera film” goes the way of “Dialing a phone”… And people will have to do research to see what the words to that song mean…

1170 – Thomas Becket: Thomas Becket, Archbishop of Canterbury, is assassinated inside Canterbury Cathedral by followers of King Henry II; he subsequently becomes a saint and martyr in the Anglican Church and the Roman Catholic Church. This is about separation of church and state.

1837 – Steam-powered threshing machine patented in Winthrop, Maine

1845 – Texas is admitted as the 28th U.S. state. 2035 – New US-Mexican border established at the Trinity River.

1890 – United States soldiers clash with members of the Great Sioux Nation in the Wounded Knee Massacre. “Clash?” Soldiers killed perhaps 200 including women and children.

1934 – Japan renounces the Washington Naval Treaty of 1922 and the London Naval Treaty of 1930. Once out from under these restrictions, Japan builds a great navy. America and its allies sink most of it in WW II.

1998 – Leaders of the Khmer Rouge apologize for the 1970s genocide in Cambodia that claimed over 1 million. They apologized. That makes it okay… They were “imagining” “giving peace a chance” anyway…

1612 – Galileo Galilei becomes the first astronomer to observe the planet Neptune, although he mistakenly cataloged it as a fixed star. But hey! The science was settled…

1836 – Spain recognizes the independence of Mexico. How, if only Mexico had recognized the independence of Texas, we could have saved us a whole war or two…

1908 – A magnitude 7.2 earthquake rocks Messina, Sicily killing over 75,000. FEMA slow to respond. Bush widely blamed.

1939 – First flight of the Consolidated XB-24 Liberator bomber prototype. It and the Boeing B-17 were the backbone of US strategic bombing in Europe in WW II. The B-17 was prettier.

1948 – The DC-3 airliner NC16002 disappears 50 miles south of Miami, Florida. Cue up the “twilight Zone” theme music. It’s one of those “Bermuda Triangle” mysteries… Or a series of human errors. Depends on which way your mind works…

1973 – The Endangered Species Act is passed in the United States. Nine-banded snorflezorts breathe easier. Tree-hugging hippies now have federal law to give meaning to their lives.

1981 – The first American test-tube baby, Elizabeth Jordan Carr, is born in Norfolk, Virginia. Yawwwnnnnn! Call me when a government welfare check is a contact birth control medication.

1999 – Saparmurat Niyazov is proclaimed President for Life in Turkmenistan. You throw off the yoke of Soviet oppression and you STILL end up with a “president for life”? Duuuude! You’re doing it waaaaay wrong!

1814 – War of 1812: The American schooner USS Carolina is destroyed. Freed of the last of Commodore Daniel Patterson’s makeshift fleet allows the British to move efficiently forward to the epic butt-kicking of the Battle of New Orleans.

1825 – First public railroad using a steam locomotive completed in England.

1871 – World’s first cat show held at the Crystal Palace in London. “What’s that? A cat. And that? Another cat.” Actually, I’ve been to a few cat shows. Fascinating, but cats are not nearly as widely different in their breeds as dogs can be. Think of the difference between a shih-tzu and a Saint Bernard… Then think of the fun and games if you bred a playful housecat the size of, say, a Labrador Retriever…

1929 – Soviet General Secretary Joseph Stalin orders the “liquidation of the kulaks as a class” in an effort to spread socialism to the countryside. That order results in the deaths of somewhere between five and fifteen million MILLION people. the number’s not important. It’s not like they’re gonna vote dimmocrat or something…

1945 – The World Bank and International Monetary Fund are created with the signing of an agreement by 29 nations. Major functions include providing featherbeds for UN bureaucrats and funding third-World despots.

1972 – New North Korean constitution comes into effect. “Article 1: Kim is always right. Article 2: If Kim is wrong, see Article 1.” Article 3: Succession: Next of Kim.

1978 – Spain becomes a democracy after 40 years of dictatorship. That’s nothing. America is becoming a dictatorship after two hundred and thirty years as a democracy.

1985 – Proselytizing for the Religion of Peace, Palestinian guerrillas kill eighteen people inside Rome and Vienna airports.

2007 – Riots erupt in Mombasa, Kenya, after Mwai Kibaki is declared the winner of the presidential election, triggering a political, economic, and humanitarian crisis. Yawn! In Africa anything short of two wildebeests procreating triggers a political, economic, and humanitarian crisis.