1775 – American Revolution: The British advancement by sea begins; Paul Revere and other riders warn the countryside of the troop movements. Now if we want to watch the enemy trying to dismantle our country, we can watch NBC, CBS, CNN, ABC, MSNBC, etc.

1783 – Fighting ceases in the American Revolution, eight years to the day since it began.

1861 – Colonel Robert E. Lee turns down promotion offer to command Union armies.

1906 – Due to Global Warming, San Francisco rocked by earthquake. 3000 die. FEMA slow to respond. Bush widely blamed.

1912 – The Cunard liner RMS Carpathia brings 705 survivors from the RMS Titanic to New York City. Today, they’d have been met by bus-loads of trial lawyers who chartered flights in to be present for their arrival. “We’ll fight to get you the money YOU deserve. (and keep 40% ourselves…)”

1942 – World War II: The Doolittle Raid on Japan. Tokyo, Yokohama, Kobe and Nagoya bombed, a story of incredible bravery and sacrifice. On the same day, Pierre Laval becomes Prime Minister of Vichy France as France moves from “surrender” to “collaborate”.

1943 – World War II: Operation Vengeance, Admiral Isoroku Yamamoto is killed when his aircraft is shot down by U.S. fighters over Bougainville Island. “I can run wild for six months … after that, I have no expectation of success.”

1954 – Gamal Abdal Nasser seizes power in Egypt, leads Egypt through TWO notable butt-kickings by Israel in 1956 and 1967.

1980 – The Republic of Zimbabwe (formerly Rhodesia) comes into being, with Canaan Banana (a clear candidate for The Name Game) as the country’s first President and Robert Mugabe as (more powerful) Prime Minister. Freed of the shackles imposed by the white European interlopers, Zimbabwe soars to new heights of prosperity. /snark