Yawn! Gulf coast springtime weather pattern. Low near seventy, high a bit above eighty. Survived yesterday’s company crawfish boil. Today is supposed to be a range day. Four guns to play with: The two AR-15 patterns I built, a short, double-barreled open-hammer shotgun, and a 9mm pistol to go with the hoard of ammo that didn’t get burned when I lost my house after Hurricane Rita. Yes, I bought a gun to go with the ammo.
This morning’s paper has a short little list of new babies, eighteen total, and in a statistical anomaly, only two born to unmarried parents, one of those being a little lost mommy who’s just too confused with the whole thing to remember who the daddy is. We’ll just dive into the list.
Miss Kashera R. does a baby girl and gives us a sad little example of punctuating your offspring with her daughter, Ava (not bad!) La’Nae. Just HAD to jump the tracks, didn’t she? Oh! Baby daddy? Who knows…
David & Deeana F. do a daughter, little Daviah Mari, because putting that ‘e’ on “Marie” just drops you down into the hoi polloi, yaknow!
Joshua & Destiny P. toss a little tryndeigh on their son, little Kaiden Enrico.
Ryan & Taryn T. bring a baby girl, little Piper Kate. Been a long time since I heard “Piper” used as a personal name.
Jonathan T. & Cassie M. just can’t do a daughter without a demonstration of their individuality in HER name, giving us little Lilly Jayde. Why the “y”? I don’t know why.
Joe & Sarah M. do a dash of tryndee with their daughter, little Rylee Nicole.
Matthew & Tara C. opened the phone book and picked a random last name for their son’s first name, giving us Harrison (whose son?!?!) John.
Tyrone & Heather J. give their son one of those manly single-syllable names in case he wants a career in country music or pro rodeo, so we get little Gabriel Jayce.
And that’s the list for this week. Now I’m going to run a few magazines through some new guns.
Every time you post these they seem more jaw droppingly stupid than the week before. This week’s list is rather tame compared to some, but, really, do these parents not think of the future and the difficulty these young ones will have? Little Ava La’Nae, Kaiden Enrico, and Daviah Mari will have a difficult time learning to spell their names correctly and forget about when they start have to give them over the phone!
Now , surely you understand that spelling is not a required subject for Preferred Species. And if somebody “misspells” their name, then obviously they are rasicts!