We got our “Eighty by eight” this morning, Headed for the low to mid-nineties with little chance of cooling rain today. When I walked out to get the paper this morning it was like lifting the lid to a steamer.

Opened the paper, passing up the news of a new casino’s job fair.  There’s another thousand low to medium-tier jobs. waded through the news until at last I came to the birth announcements.  This week we have thirty-eight new babies born between July 7 & 23. Twenty-one are to unmarried parents and two new mommies sort of fogged out on who the baby daddy is.

Let’s charge over the hill, shall we?

Curtis M. Jr. & Christa C. pick a random word to tag their daughter, so she’s Lyric Leanne.

Andre & Tedriyonne(!!) P. show their son, little Asher Tyeis.  “Asher” is a real name.  “Tyeis”, on the other hand, is what you get when the dog eats the Scrabble set.

First apostrophe shows up to add class to the son of Jerald N. & April S., Zavieun Ke’Mon.  Note that they adhere to the “Capitalize the first letter after the goofy-a**ed apostrophe” rule.

Adhering to the same rule, Daniel L. & Keturan(!) S do a daughter up as A’Niyah Renee.

Willie & Kathy C. give their son one of those manly trade names, Carter Maddox.  Either that or they’re into historical governors of southern states.

Kenneth & Alicia G. don’t want you to think their daughter is named for a northern clan of profligate womanizers, so her name is spelled Kenndi Alise.

James & Stephanie V. triple up on their son, little Zachary Michael-Thane.

Sondai(!) B. & Natore(!) J. perpetuate the travesty with their son, Khilyn Jamar.

Another manly trade name shows up with the son of David S. & Samantha B, Mason Eli.

And then John & Rebbica (Yeah, I double-checked the spelling) H. do their son as Hunter John.  Wonder if they’re gonna have a daughter, Gatherer Debbie?

Darien S. & Aleatra(!) K. use punctuation to confer a sense of class upon their son, Jeremiah De’Shawn.

Gregory G. & Victoria S. go for geography and history for their daughter, little Londyn McKinnley.

And that’s the list for this week.