Seventy-two degrees at 0800 this morning, heading for the upper seventies today. Under hazy skies I walked out to pick up the paper. The local government is proud to have passed themselves a little law enforcement tax in yesterday’s election. Oh yeah, it was the ONLY item on the ballot. They got an 8% voter turnout and the tax passed 80-20, the eighty being just about the number of people who will benefit from the money collected.

On to the names.  There were fifty new babies announced in the paper, all from the big hospital across the river.  Of fifty, thirty, that’s sixty percent, are to unmarried parents and ten percent, that’s five are to mommies still wondering who hit ’em.

Let’s proceed.

Miss Jasmine B. doesn’t have to waste time talking to the missing daddy so she gets to be creative.  Her very own baby doll daughter gets named Jaylianis Nicole.

Ramone H. & Kyeria(!) T. pick euphonious syllables and assemble them into a name for their baby girl, Nyla Ranae.

Randy & Tamika(!) R-B apostophicate a baby girl to go with their hyphenated fake marriage, so we meet little A’Randy Joy.  See what they did there?  Clever folk!

Another apostrophe shows up as Marquias(!) B. & Chante'(!) D. do a daughter, Aaliyah Challe’.

Tyler B. & Jaide(!) L. do a daughter, Embri Kate.

Let’s squeeze in a couple of kids whose parents are impressed by motorcycles:  Reco(!) P. & Laura T. tag a son with Harley Jayce and Ryan D. & Constance D. (different surnames) do a daughter with Harlee Danay, the ‘ee’ apparently being the feminine version of ‘Harley’.

Wade D. & Melissa S. give their son an industrial name, Gauge Everett.

Miss Brianna G. shows her son, Kayson Deshon.

MIchael II & Amber C. do a daughter with Faelynn LeAnn, throwing in an extra capital letter to show that they’re people of quality.

Joshua H. & Krystal L. do a daughter with Malon Moon.  M-O-O-N spells ‘sophisticated’.

Daniel Jr. & Katrina (too old for the hurricane) W. do a son with Daxson King.

Donald Jr. & Misty S. give their daughter her very first stripper name, Scarlett Reign.

A triple shows up as Kendall & Mallory C. show us their son, little Beckham King Richard.

George W. & Allison B. show a daughter, Avenly Mae.

Matthew & Nicole B. avoid the dreaded ‘cks’ with their son Jaxson Tyler.

Albert J. & Moneka(!) D. do a daughter, Zhliah Alise, destined to go through life answering ‘How do you pronounce your name?”

Miss Sarah H. gives her daughter an angle on future clientele, tagging her with Saylor Layne.

Blake B. & Taylor G. place their hope in herbs, tagging their daughter with Sage Hope.

And that’s good enough for a week don’t you think?