Low last night was 68. Add ten degrees and you get the afternoon high. We’re overcast, too. welcome to springtime in southwest Louisiana. It was not unpleasant to walk outside and get the paper. The air was like cool, slightly damp velvet.

I picked out names from the Saturday paper, where the “pay-as-you-go” hospital lists birth announcements, complete with pictures, for paying customers, and the Sunday paper, where they list terse little snippets. That’s a total of thirty-two births, eleven to unmarried couples and three to new mommies who can’t remember a name for a baby daddy.

So let’s take a look. First, we’ll look at people who just want names that make cute sounds. Who cares if they mean anything or are real names.

Gourtney C. & Ivy G. want their baby girl to remind everybody of motorcycles crashing through flower beds, so they tag her with Harleigh Rose.

Two days apart in the same hospital, two sets of new parents were seized with the same bright idea, so on one day, Cristy E. & Don C. named their baby girl Katelyn Marie, and then two days later Shawndell & Willie T. named their baby girl Kaitlyn A’Kyra. Note that Shawndell & Willie made their baby more special by changing the spelling of the first name and adding an extraneous bit of punctuation and an extra capital letter to the middle name, sure signs of proper upbringing.

Natalie & James M. make up a cute-sounding first name for their new son, little Kelby James.

Dava & Chris J. know that the key to good nameage is to toss out limits like spelling, so they tag their baby girl with Camryn Lynn.

Miss Tiffany B. presents her baby boy, little Brody Reagan. She left a blank space for “father’s name” on the birth registration.

Shida d. & Jason D. (different last names) bring their baby boy, little Blazen James.

Miss Meagan S. has a new son, little Carter Blaise, giving him, alternately, the name of last century’s worst president and the name of a famous stripper. She remains silent on the name of little Carter’s daddy.

Showing that goofy spelling is intergenerational, Kelli (with an “i”, thank you!) and Ramzie (That’s “zee – ee – eye” not “ess – ee – wye”) present their daughter, little Kaylie Majel.

Cherie S. & Jason C. Present their son, little Kacen Allen.

We have one couple that combines two categories in one great name as Shawneequa (!) S. & Delrick D. tag their new son with Delrick (oaky, you can forgive using the daddy’s name, maybe) Dionne (that one came out of nowhere) Da’Vaughn (but we GOTS ta use a apostrophe. It’s an ethnic imperative!).

And when that’s done, it’s time to end things for this week.