Tag Archives: Pluckame

Col. Johnson Wakes Up In Pluckame

Posted on by
Reply

wake up sleepy head 2

~~~

episode 2

by

rawclyde!

~~~

She carried on constant dialogue with

Saint Joan of Arizona, her best friend

Whom she had never met face to face but

Saint Joan was Sheena’s favorite spirituality

~

Colonel Sheena Johnson of the US Army

Begged Holy Jesus for salvation, Holy Mary for holy prayers

When she caught a wink of rest she woke up

Surrounded by God, His angels, and Afghan villagers

~

Her hair-splitting arrows, her death-begotten spear

Her footprints filled Taliban hearts with fear

For some holy reason she never missed nor was hit

Al Queda, so full of it, finally ducked out & split

~

Colonel Sheena Johnson of the US Army

Of the entire planet & the universe too

Held Islam like a coin in the palm of her hand

And the little brains in her toes understood Afghanistan

~

One morning she awoke in the ruins of

A small mosque in the beat-up village of Pluckame

Perched invisible on a distant mountain ridge

3 midgets watched her eyes open like she was a cartoon on TV

~

Sitting cross-legged in a row with 3 grinning faces

These poverty-stricken midgets were doomed to grow up Taliban

That is, before they found Col. Sheena Johnson

Who immediately became their favorite cartoon character…

~~~

text copyright clyde collins 2013

photo: tanya roberts

~~~

favorite cartoon character

~~~

Afghaneeland Adventure Series | Old Timer Chronicle II

http://www.comicvine.com/sheena/4005-31442

http://www.tanyaroberts.biz/en.index.htm

~~~

The Colonel’s Arrow Hits It’s Mark

Posted on by
Reply

Tanya as Col. Johnson

episode 3

by

rawclyde!

~

Col. Sheena Johnson stretched her limbs

Tossed a blanket, sat up, stared back at the midget trio

She leaped to her feet into a combat pose

Slapped the half-pints around playfully

~

They were aghast, eyes big marbles, mouths gaping caves

The colonel’s semi-naked attributes stunned

These little Muslim boys in the highest elevations of Afghanistan

She bounced them around like basketballs & they all cleaned-up the place

~

After a while they were making mud bricks

Repairing walls & painting murals on them

Of historic battles in various nearby locales

With splattered suicide bombers hobnobbing with virgins in the clouds

~

The virgins had naked navels, long blond hair & blue eyes

Just like Col. Sheena Johnson

One of the midgets, who everyone called Ollie, was painting a halo

On one of the virgins when his older Taliban brother walked-in

~

This feller turned into a hurricane of destruction

Undid all the work the short fellers & their new friend had done

The colonel had disappeared, was no where to be found

But one of her arrows returned, calmed the hurricane down

~

(Copyright Clyde Collins 2013)

~

final_inline

The Afghaneeland Adventure Series | Old Timer Chronicle II

~

no longer on the radar

Posted on by
Reply

~

episode 12

Burqa Time

by rawclyde!

~

Col. Sheena Johnson

No longer on the radar

Her outpost so carefully nurtured & thriving

Is bombed & abandoned

~

A detriment to the war effort

Yes, no longer on the radar

provocatively walks up

In her jungle-girl allure

~

~

Walks up to Habibullah the young Taliban

Her arrow has been stuck in his hand for some time now

He’s pinned to the wall of the busted-up village mosque forever

She breathes on his face

~

Habibullah’s wide-open eyes roll in his head

Suddenly he wants this dangerous half-naked infidel in his bed

His jihad heart ceases to hate the arrow in his hung-up hand

Col. Johnson communicates to him that she wants a burqa

~

text copyright clyde collins 2014

guest artist ~ marilyn anne fraser

~

The Afghaneeland Adventure Series | Old Timer Chronicle II

~

afghaneeland

Posted on by
Reply

00829_01, Afghanistan, 1980, AFGHN-13342

~

episode 13

Dervish Whirl

by rawclyde !

~

Ollie spin spin spin

All around the ruin of the village mosque

Bump into walls, out hole in a wall

Up the path, thru the gate, into the house

~

Spinning like a top, spinning ’til he drop

A grinning little lass burning lots of gas

A midget dust-devil whirling room to room

‘Til finally he bump Mom & say:

~

“Burqa burqa burqa!”

“Wha?”

“Burqa burqa burqa!”

She hand him a yellow polka-dot burqa & he spin away

~

afghn-133881

~

Meanwhile back in the ruins big brother Habibullah

Twist his hand around n’ around Col. Sheena Johnson’s arrow

That so long ago zzzzzzzip thru that hand &

Pin him to the wall

~

He twist his hand around & around

The pain shoot up n’ down his arm

In n’ out his heart

Col. Johnson see Taliban eyes full of hate go gooey

~

Here come little dusty Afghanistani whirlwind

spinning spinning & grinning

Ollie puts Momma’s burqa in Habibullah’s other hand

Bulla hands the holy garment to my denudated U.S. Army colonel

~

east1_2016733c

 guest artists:

Steve McCurry

https://stevemccurry.blog

&

Robert Longo

http://www.robertlongo.com

text:

Copyright Clyde Collins 2014

The Afghaneeland Adventure Series | Old Timer Chronicle II

~

episode 14

Posted on by
Reply

!

Taliban Polka

by

rawclyde

!

Col. Sheena Johnson, U.S. Army

Forever, no matter what, with valor

Slips the yellow polka-dot burqa over her head

The silk toboggans down her She curves & rides!

~

Oh oh, Taliban Bullah’s eyes are oat meal

His captured hand sloshes red syrup up & down her arrow

Remember, his hand is pinned to the ruin of the village mosque

Col. Sheena stands there & let’s it happen

~

Eyeball to eyeball, their eyeballs explode heaven

Sheena misses walkin’ down the block to the 7-ll

Sheena becoming Pluckame on the high Nuristan ridge

A dew drop plummets from a cloud passing by

~

Outta the yellow burqa comes Sheena’s knife sharper than invisibility

Slices off the feathered end of the protruding stick

Habibullah’s hand slips off, he’s free

Musical notes glide outta his eyes singing “Marry Me”

~

Suddenly Taliban surround the broken building

brandishing gun & rocket & stoic hypocrisy

Their holy war now gots only hate within

Gonna punish Habibullah real good for his handsome sin

~

afghaneeland

~

art: lora croft tomb raider ~ text: copyright clyde collins 2015

mosque

Posted on by
Reply

episode 15

Mosque2_02.jpg4fe930e3-9cee-4ded-8593-6617be5a9df1Large

~~~

by rawclyde !

~~~

God organizes His forces

Bolts of lightning spruce-up the sky

There is much attention to detail

On a minuscule planet among planets

~~~

Afghan village after allied bombing

~~~

Love doves & bleary-eyed mules

Gather ’round the holy-war warriors who are

Full of bullet-flattering burro shit

Killing God’s children & reaping heavenly reward

~~~

Afghanistan Reconstruction

~~~

Ah yes, we doves & mules gather around

We gots bullets & rockets & A-bombs too

If you wanna be a nuisance

Keep on killing like insects do

~~~

new mosque

~~~

What you need is a brain

Fueled-up for the wise adventure

And a heart that

Beats the real rhyme

~~~

Upfront w Christ

~~~

So “suddenly” turns into months

While the village sets-up voting polls

Votes for a president & rebuilds the mosque

Sheena & Habibullah are wed…

~~~

article-2270722-173EF0F1000005DC-600_634x672

The Afghaneeland Adventure Series | Old Timer Chronicle II

~~~

(text copyright clyde collins 2014)

~~~

calling collect

Posted on by
Reply

~

episode 20

Interlude

by

rawclyde

!

Taliban make merry with ample ammo & bullets dance

The Afghan National Army soldier pulls a cell phone out of

One of several pouches on his chest & dials collect

The other ANA soldier grinds his teeth

~

A stray bullet ricochets around in the empty cup in his hand

Luckily the cup is made of tin, not porcelain

Then the bullet stands up on the cup’s rim & starts singing

Which adds real & deep meaning to the drama

~

Everyone is leaning closer and closer toward the cell phone

The soldier with the little thing up against the side of his head

Makes amiable conversation, smiles a lot

Puts the phone away & says to the other soldier

~

“The captain says to wait a moment”

The other soldier rolls his eyeballs skyward & twiddles his thumbs

The woman in the yellow polka-dot burqa gets up off the old blanket

And floats back to her modest dwelling to replenish the tea pot

~

“What color were her eyes?”

“I believe they were blue.”

“Do you suppose she is the legendary woman?”

“Well, this is Pluckame, isn’t it?”

~

Yes, anything goes in Pluckame

You never know what’s going to happen nex’

Whether it’s a vote gone awry or a bullet in your eye

The invisible village up there on the mountain ridge

~

~

Afghaneeland Adventure Series

~

text copyright clyde collins 2015