Inopportune

I wasn’t who they seen me as

But then again, I can’t fault them

They weren’t any more authentic

Than I was pretending to be myself

I was young and fitting into a role

That’s what immaturity acts like

Not that it’s an excuse: it’s a stage

A poor position making hard progress

More likely to be misread than understood

It’s meant to be that way for all concerned

In the same fashion of growth by desire

If you don’t hunger for it, you don’t feed it

But like all knowledge, it’s a dual edge sword

At times we bleed ourselves… to death

Photo by Andre Furtado on Pexels.com

Lifemares

It feels like insomnia but- not

Oversleeping the lost moments

Regret might come to my mind

If it stabilized enough to work

Some days just become weeks

Some moments feel incomplete

Trade-offs are the new currency

After becoming a broken pauper

I perceive no direction feels right

Even if I’ve repeatedly turned left

If I had wings, they’d be broken

I felt the thud void of its sound

Or I just missed it passing by

Beset into my marish rest…life

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Scholars

There be many forms of degrees to be had

Some be accomplished and some are lived

Wounds and burns from over their years

Signify much more than a person of learnt

Until reality became so abruptly obvious

After an uncertainty fogyish disappeared

Punishment chases after rare authenticity

If it’s misused as a dark planet in a galaxy

Of abusive or transactional relationships

As self-appointed sun’s plays center stage

Expecting a world to revolve around them

Bask in their glory at expenses of everyone

Tickets aren’t a requirement, but purchase is

Some degrees are more costly… than others

Photo by Erik Karits on Pexels.com

Omitted

There are those like us- broken

That use vices: drugs, or alcohol

Not to feel their real suffering loss

But we’ll abstain from that course

We endure dissent and their silence

As our lingering desperation echoes

To be seen, be touched, to be loved

In the same fashion, we’ve once held

But reality still denies us all of that

We safeguard fragile bridges of hope

In distant connection, we can’t close

Like distant stars in a nearby space

Places we know but can’t get back to

Left behind feels like trapped…in place

Photo by Adrian Monserrat on Pexels.com

Maverick

I do not comport to today’s culture

An indelicacy of unacceptable norms

To move on and let go pretentiously

More so, for benefit of others than me

And then simply capitulate my beliefs

As if they were delusions of grandeur

Which induces my instinctive response

I can’t pretend and still feel I’m honest

While freighting truth comes at a cost

Its dichotomy separates by distinctions

I don’t require affirmation of the world

Or fear perception as odd sort of outlier

Nor need be told how to behave openly

As if my rejection equates to…petulance

Photo by Cara Denison on Pexels.com

Nevertheless

I feel more like rough-faced stone

Scars left behind by my old love

On my mind and carved on my soul

In darker hours, as I feel so cold

Hiding behind these walls of mine

When there’s no sign of any light

Those I love let me feel disgraced

Abandoned- like a forgotten prisoner

Whose number replaced his name

Sentenced for the balance of my life

I still feel urged to forgive them

And I admit, it’s an added burden

That I chose to carry alone if I must

And these shadows weigh the most

But so does…the total cost of love

Photo by Amel Uzunovic on Pexels.com

Frayed

No new day feels like the old ones

And tenor of life has lost its flavor

I struggle subsisting without you

And I really miss you when it hurts

Brokenness may expand for some

But for some, fissures last forever

I suspect my life will feel very long

As I fumble throughout most nights

Each feeling hollower than the last

I talk to you so I can escape myself

Knowing I’ll not hear any response

Maybe I count on it far too often

I doubt a lot of things in life now

But even my faith adorns…wear

Photo by Victor Dunn on Pexels.com

Tablou

Regurgitated as an abstract concept

The total inversion of reality itself

Assertions replaces past anecdotal

Prudence is exchanged for dramatics

In predication for imaginary excuses

Lazy viewers parrot false accusations

The same fashion bias reporters report

Citing their veiled confidential sources

That intrinsic excuse that protects liars

And to let staining suppositions foster

Paths designed to be adversely painful

When a few insecure fear factual truth

But I remain as an immovable fortress

So- fire away at your own… perils

Photo by Corey Alexander on Pexels.com

Contradiction

In the fog of our brokenness

Where doubt seems tenuous

But concurrently untenable

We drift about emotionally

Between good and bad days

We realize spatial awareness

Has been shattered like glass

Reflections become irrelevant

Where shadows seem friendly

But our trust lacks capability

Ideas of tangible are intangible

Old constructs have imploded

Time feels too heavy to sustain

And our lives feel… ambiguous

Photo by Trung Nguyen on Pexels.com

Stump

Yesterday’s run off with dawn

Slipped away in the darkness

Like some thief of the nightlife

Leaving me here within sadness

Retiring me to the silent echoes

That reverberates my emptiness

Some forgot within a few days

Some forgot many days before

I decline to forget anyone I love

As love’s eternal flame burns on

It’s just a manner I was created

My tomorrows will feel hollow

Nothing that I could ever define

I sit here emptier…in silent time

Photo by Erik Karits on Pexels.com

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this: