Tag Archives: microfiction

poetry

Despair and hope!!

Ripped off of feelings
I walk bare on the streets
Working on an auto mode
Dying on the inside

Tears hidden in the raindrops
Soaking my misery
Walking in this downpour
Completely lost my everything

The rain stops falling
I am still wet
Shuddering from the cold wave
Trying to find a shelter

Started from my house
Wanting to throw away this life
Then why am I trying
To bring warmth to this cold body

A little sun
Coming out through the sea of clouds
I start chasing its light
Like the only thing I need

Where does this newfound love for life
Come from anyway….
One moment I was ready to jump off the cliff
Now I am searching for ropes
To hold on to, with every breath I take

Like the sun has
broken free from the clouds just to stop me
The rain fell
to wash off of me the desire to flee
The sun shone
to show me the path to the rainbow of my life

The problems remain
Yet I feel like I can fight now
The earth fought
To bring me back
Now it is my time
To shine through!!

By Rensaisei

Standard
poetry

Shrine of Yami

The darkness loomed
Never ending, bifurcating
A black fog covered my soul
Nightmares turned flashes of reality
Quickening of breaths, trembling body
Symptoms severe, Looking for an exit
I found inside me a building of existence
In between my own existential crisis
Shrine of Yami I named it
Spent my time uncovering its secret
Not afraid of darkness,
The deity inside enjoyed it
The elixir to my sufferings
I might have found it
Shakable, Unshakable
Breakable, Unbreakable
I was tossing and turning
Trying to obtain it

The deity finally ravelled it
Casting out the darkness
Can never save me
Embracing it completely
Will help me see it
The light was in front of me
Hikari was hiding in plain sight
Removing the filters will help it shine brightly
Seeing oneself from our own eyes
Was the trick behind it
Everyone else is a useless critic
Make sure you deny it!

By Rensaisei

Standard
poetry

Trapped

Standing in the balcony of my house
I feel nauseous
I feel sick
Even though its raining outside
The weather I love
Yet the weather I am longing for
Just a precipe away
Millimeters infacts
I feel the raindrops
Touching me and
Slipping away from me
I am at the boundary
Boundary separated by a cage
Cage invisible to others
Made for me….or for everyone
From the moment I was born
This cage surrounds me
My heart
My soul
Encaged in it
Why???
I ask
No answer is given
I am not even eligible for the answers it seems
Trying to break free
Struggling
A struggle not visible to others
A struggle against whom
My family
Society
Norms
Myself
The fog surrounds the answers and me both
When will it lift up
Will i ever be able to break free from it
With my own power
Or
Will I die in it
Whatever be the case
It seems I will be happy
Happy dead than caged
Happy dead than be lifeless
Happy dead than not able to touch the raindrops
My favourite weather…yet it makes me sad…
The paradox of it amuses me with no end!

By Rensaisei

Standard
poetry

Let me be…!!

Let me be, I screamed
Let me be, I roared

A voice came raging in
From the depths of mine
Stop with the preaching
Stop with the assessing
I am not the stereotype
I am the rebel type
I do what I like and
I like what I do

It leads me to places I love and hate
To feelings I never wanted to know
To feelings I will cherish everyday
It leads me to people
From all sorts of life
But most of all it leads me
To myself – a new version
With every fight

Society wants it
They can shove it
It is solely my life
I run it with only
What I feel is right
My values are my own
Not copy pasted from
Every other cornerstone

I own what I do
No regrets is all I wanna grow upto
Carrying my heart on my sleeves
I fight every day
It is not a fight against one sex
But us versus them
Equality versus paradoxical
It is a fight against the phrase
“You are born in the wrong era/wrong place.”
To manifesting a –
“The place adapts to your headspace”

Let me be, I screamed
Let me be, free of chains
Let me be, my own curator
Not bounded by societal drains!

By Rensaisei

Standard
poetry

Stained Angel Wings

A child cries in the room
Everybody rejoices
An angel has been born
To kindle everyone’s life with happiness

The angel opens their eyes
Looks at the world
So pure it looks to them
Just like their souls

They crawl and walk
Enter the world
Start seeing things
And recognising

A few whites
A few blacks
Interspersed in them
A lot of greys

Angel starts running now
Blocking the blacks
Trying to dodge the greys
Pureness is what is desired
Yet no one is pure
All have a hidden side
They keep it hidden
Under the veil of white lies

Amid these hypocrites
The angel tries not to loose
But the ways get tougher
The roads onwards foggier
Crossing them is not easy
Most of them are blindsided
Walking through these
Treacherous paths
The soul gets either
trapped or liberated

At the end of the tunnel
The angel stops running
Looks at them-self
And sees the difference
Not a pure soul anymore
Neither a bad one
Just a fighter
Just a survivor
With scars of black white and grey
On the “Stained angel wings”.

By Rensaisei

Standard
poetry

Phoenix

The sand felt soft under my feet
Yet it burned with a passion that
Left scorching scars and pain
That I felt for days and will remember for eternity

That is how I fall in love
Softly, steadily and then all at once
Burning with passion and desires
Leaving marks that will remain
For an eternity

Thats how you thought of me
Soft cushioned bag
Everything will bounce of her
Just keep on throwing
You thought I was dispensable
I let you believe in it
I was just there for you
By losing myself in unknown territories
All of that burned me again
And shaped a different me

I love you still softly and passionately
But I choose not to be burnt by you anymore
Now you have to earn me
And keep on earning
For I have risen from the ashes
This phoenix will now touch the skies it belongs to!!

By Rensaisei

Standard
poetry

Unravel the anxious mind…!!

It is a mystery to me
I can never unravel it
My mind is absolutely numb
Yet I cant seem to stop smiling

People think she is fine
Look at her happy demeanour
Who will waste energy
On explaining to them
The state of my complexities

Complexities that even I cant seem
To understand
Every time I try
I make the web even worse
Lost in this maze of dozen feelings
Still not able to reach
An exit to these questions

A question is revealed every now and then
The stupid mind of mine asks me
And I never have an answer in return
Why?
What?
How?
Again…??
Will it stop?
Will someone see…will someone realize?
Amid these daggers
My heart has split a million times

My heart – is it still here
Yes it is beating
Yes it is pumping blood
But it has stopped its most important function
To FEEL…!!
An emptiness lies where it existed
Each time I try to open this maze
I am reminded of its absence
The ashes that lie
In place of a whole healthy heart
The crushing vibrates
In the very core of my soul

Exaggeration it is
Will say many
You are over reacting
Over thinking…try to think positively

What they dont realise is
In this trying of thinking differently
Looking for positivity
The wounds have been ignored
Left opened to reap infections
Now they reek toxins
That infect every fibre of my existence!

Every time I try to unravel
Another roadblock I face
All my labour goes into
Breaking it down
Invisible to the eyes
Of my beloved’s and my allies
Allies or not
I do not know
I wish to find out
Will every there be a way out
An opening to let the light through

I am not weak
Let me remind
Fighting what I fight
And still smile is a strength
A strength like no other
Unrecognised still
Ignored other times still
It exists in the core of my being

That is the reason
I am here
Striving to find that opening
Striving to come out of it
In this hellish world
Trying to find my sweet heaven
Or making this hell mine
Either way….I know how to survive
What I want is recognition
Of my fight.
For this is not just my fight
There are many like me
Unable to express
We all fight silently!
The warriors in the shadows
We shine brightest under
The full moon night!

By Rensaisei

Standard
poetry

And the struggle continues…..

I am not in love anymore
I have moved on
His name does not rile me anymore
His presence doesnot, faze me anymore
His voice does not, make goosebumps appear anymore
His smile, does not make my heart race anymore
His being doesnot resonate with me anymore
My soul doesnot gravitate towards him anymore
A notification from the furtherworld
An anonymous message was enough
To break this misbelief, I am just waiting
For him to come back, and take over
For this heart is not mine anymore!!

By Rensaisei

Standard
poetry

Smile!!

Forcing ourselves to smile
To smiling constantly
How far have we come
In the world of
Pretending to be fine
To smiling naturally
Even in pain
Making me wonder often
Is this numbness to emotions
Or am I trying to fool myself??

Will anyone ever realise
This is just a mask on my face
Me and others like me
Not always happy
But smiling has become
Our way of handling pain!

By Rensaisei

Standard