Monthly Archives: February 2013

Not My Consumption

Posted on by rmott62

Many attackers of exited women and their allies comes from the primitive belief that we hate sex.

I would laugh at that if i wasn’t crying in frustration and deep fury, for in saying that you are defining sex as something you must consume – no matter the harms you to others to yourself.

I thought sex was meant to an intimate way to communicate love; I thought sex was meant to done to have fun without destroying another for that fun; and I thought sex was something that was free, and not brought and sold.

I am so naive to believe that sex should fun, safe, equal and unspoken way to express love.

But, I find many exited women hold on to that naivety despite the constant polluting of our dreams of making sex good.

We believe in sex as a liberator, as enjoyment and as a place to find safety – only every moment of every day our belief is spit on.

We have known and been inside all consumption of sex – and our experiences should be heard, and you should learn that sex and consumption should never be intertwined.

Place sex into the capitalist market, put sex into all computers, make sex sell all goods, have sex carry all crime plots – and you just lose all human contact and ability to feel sexual emotions.

When we make sex an object to be brought and sold, we are designing a class of mainly women and girls that are stripped of human emotions, are made to be nothing holes to have sex acts put into.

This is called prostitution and porn – you consume any prostitute, consume any porn, and you are an agent in the destruction of the prostituted class.

I hear you say and scream endlessly –

Not my porn. Not the prostitute I buy.

I am the good guy.

My stash, my prostitute – is the good type.

I am not violent.

I consume alternative porn.

All inside my porn/prostitution are happy and empowered.

I hear you – but however times you repeat that mantra, you are still an agent in the genocide of the prostituted.

There is no such thing as a prostitution without violence; no such thing as porn without hate.

Your porn/use of a prostitute may in your head be politically correct, you may delude yourself and others that you respect and even honour those inside the prostituted class.

But, each you pay for sex or consume porn – you don’t give a damn that you stripping the prostituted class of basic human rights.

Let start with consuming porn, look inside your lies to yourself.

If you just wanted to sexual imagery, see sex in images of equality and communication – then there is reams of erotica, there are many films, there are photos and paintings.

But you seek out porn, so you want violence and to see mainly women being degraded.

You want to know sex is pain, and pain is sex.

You want sex to conquer and destroy, you want sex to be hate.

You are making the choice to find porn, don’t make out it was peer pressure or some kind of accident – you can always make the choice to not consume porn.

If you choose to consume porn, then you are the agent in the torturing, raping, mental violence and murders of the “actresses” inside your porn.

If you consume porn, you will see if you look with a clear eye – you will the dead eyes of those inside porn, see clearly it is real pain/real torture, see it is beyond endurance.

You consume porn – and we have the right to hate you.

The same goes for each and every man who make the choice to buy the prostituted.

We have the right to hate, and no longer listen to your pathetic excuses.

Lead by exited women, I would say the time for punter’s excuses is coming to an end.

There are so many excuses – never speaking to the simple truth that punters enjoy having power and control over a human who has no rights to say no, a human that the punter can and will whatever violence he can imagine to.

Excuses, excuses, excuses are now getting old.

There is that some men must have access to the prostituted for they are disabled, lonely, old, or a virgin.

What the fuck – so the prostituted may as be called goods that are dragged out so isolated men can poke, manipulate and consume.

There is no questioning of why some men are not having sex, or even why it is considered that all must have sex.

I get furious at the patronising attitude about disabled men, the assumption that they cannot build or receive sexual emotions without consuming a prostitution.

There no introduction to sex education, no allowing sexual emotions to grow – no the disabled are made the Other.

As for most isolated men, it utter bullshit that they must have sex or what – their dicks will go green and fall off, or of course they will become serial rapists of innocent non-prostituted women and girls.

Having sex is not a given for anyone, and there plenty of people who are totally fine not having constant sex.

It is made out by idiots that men must have sex as some kind of a human right.

A human right like the right to eat, the right to have access to water, the right to full safety, and the right to shelter.

Of course, it is only men that have this ridiculous right to always have sex – it is no issue if women have to live without sex.

This stupid belief is the under-pinning of the invention of the prostituted class – it is under-pinned with the constant threat that men must have access to pay for sex, or they will rape all women and girls outside the sex trade.

I find that exited women and their allies do not have such a low opinion of men – we do not think men need the prostituted class to prevent sexual violence, we believe that men can learn to end rape.

But, when most cultures and societies make it normal to buy and consume sex – we live inside a world that state clearly rape is normal as long as it is kept invisible inside the minds and bodies of the prostituted class.

In that environment, rape will be normal for men to do to all women and girls.

Allow your consumption of prostitutes and porn to grow, and you are making all women and girls live in terror – including your mother, your girlfriend, your sister and your wife.

You may convince yourself that the violence and hate is keep inside the sex trade – but each time you rape a prostitute or view porn torture, you are saying that is what women wants and need.

The issue of porn and prostitution is your consumption – for you can at any time make the conscious choice to not be part of that destruction.

All it takes is growing up and being a real man.

The Wrong Road

Posted on by rmott62

Prostitution is full of grief.

The grief of seeing a crossroad and always taking the wrong turning.

That is how I remember prostitution – that is how it is remembered through self-loathing and inability to see all choice was stolen from me, was stolen from all my prostituted Sisters.

It is easier to blame yourself for taking too many wrong turning – than to know a reality of mental and physical manipulation, of being trapped into hell in degrees.

How can the truth be seen and known, when it so gradual?

The trap is make the prostitute feel it is her choice to have more and more sadist acts done to her.

Make her feel it the only way to get decent money; tell her she more adventurous than other women; say she is special so punters ask for her; say it just a one-off; say it is a punishment and won’t happen again.

It is a drip-feed of making the prostitute lose feeling, driving her into at first shocked numbness leading into violence so routine she is dead but somehow alive.

I know that deadness, I still carry it as I remember, I still carry it into all my words on what prostituted meant to me.

I know what it was to be dead, but having to continue.

Deadness is the only to deal with living inside routine rapes – heck, rapes is too banal for what the average prostitute goes through.

There is a limited and inadequate for being raped thousands of times. How does language framed that?

How does language give back the body which had no safe place from sexual invasion.?

Prostituted women and women are nuked into being sexual goods, for then they can survive by not feeling, not remembering they are human.

To be a prostitute, is to be goods, that is the simple truth.

Punters buy prostitutes as they would choose instant coffee in a supermarket. In the end all instant coffee is the same, but the label makes the buyer say there is a difference.

It is the same as punter choose between street prostitute or an escort, between getting the prostitute on the net or going to a brothel – in the end all whores are the same to the punters.

All whores are there for him to do whatever sexual porn fantasy he wants – the only difference like his instant coffee is how much cash he will put out to destroy her.

There is no passion, no connection and certainly no idea of having mutual sex, when a punter makes the choice to consume a prostitute.

It is all about his “needs”, his greed, his hate of the prostitute, his desire to have control, his need to own another human, and his ability to be violent without consequences.

If anyone has made the wrong turning – it is every single man in the world who make the choice to consume prostitutes for any reason.

There is no reason that is good enough for buying a prostitute – every punter can walk away from making that choice.

But instead of seeing the punter, all the blame is placed onto the prostitute for her wrong choices and making the wrong turns in the road.

All prostitutes are made to blamed for their own rapes, their own tortures and their own murders.

Even the few who are lucky enough to have limited violence – are made to know that sexual violence is just their norm, it is the risk of their lifestyle.

Ever since prostitution has existed, it has been decided that it is impossible to rape a prostitution, it is decided that you cannot torture a prostitute for it just extras or kinky sex – it is decided that no-crime to murder a prostitute.

This is embedded in all aspects of prostitution – prostitutes are made nothing but throwaway goods.

We are given no rights to feel or know the violence that is our know – we have all language of rights, all language of saying you can’t do that to us, all language of self-dignity stolen from us.

The prostituted are made speechless – and then we are told it must be our choice for we never complain or speak out.

But look into the silence – and see it is rage of the tortured.

 

 

 

The Invisible Men

Posted on by rmott62

Punters are everywhere – and they are constantly made nowhere.

All conversation, research and debate on prostitution is mainly focus on the prostituted – no-one pay attention to the way men make the choice to buy the prostituted.

There is little or no interest in who these men are – unless it is the sex trade lobby to say they are lonely, disabled, men who must have sex, men we should feel sorry for.

We don’t speak of these men in fear that they are men we know and love.

Well, listen and truly hear exited women, and you will find the majority of punters are very ordinary, yes, they are more than likely men you know well and may love.

Punters are not monsters – well not in the world outside of buying another human for their sexual greed.

Punters are every man from every background, disabled or not, from all classes, any ethnicity, old or young, violent or thinks he’s a gentle man, unemployed or all jobs there is, all political backgrounds – and on and on and on.

There is no stereotype of who the punter is – only he is a man who thinks his the god-given right to buy a prostitute to control, own and ultimately destroyed.

Punters are invisible because they are so ordinary.

Another major reason punters are made invisible is that the majority of the violence done to the prostituted is also made invisible.

There is a myth that men who are violent to the prostituted will be spotted for they will be violent to the non-prostituted.

This is rarely true – most punters keep the violence for the prostituted class, they place inside the box of the sex trade and are non-violent to those outside that box.

The hate and violence done to the prostituted is made ordinary as long it keep inside that box – it is only seen as a problem when it may or does spread to the non-prostituted.

Look at the normal debate about the harms of porn – it is normal the concern is how it affects children and teenagers, it is normal it is seen as bad for it is fake sex – there is little or no interest in that porn is violent to the women inside the porn, that it is destroying their bodies and their minds.

It is believed by too many that we need a class of the prostituted, for it may prevent real rape done to real women and girls.

Does that sentence offend you? Are you thinking I would never think that.

Well, each time you choose to not see, not know and not confront that men you know are buying women and girls, you are part of that false belief.

Look and truly see men you work with, men you socialise with, men who are family, men you may sleep with.

See that any one of them could be a punter.

It cannot be a tiny minority of men in any society or culture.

Think that prostitution when it is made acceptable or legal, will be in a country where there will thousands of prostituted women and girls.

Think the majority of the prostituted will start young and be inside the sex trade for several years.

Think that it is rare that a prostitute has regular, most have the minimum of five punters a week up too many for the mind to know.

How can it the minority of men demanding a prostitute – it makes no logical sense. Simple maths will tell you that is rubbish.

So, whether you like it or no, you will know a punter or some punters – and you will think they are the sort of men that would never do that.

I have been in social events, in pubs, at parties – where I seen punters who treated me as dirt, punters who enjoy torturing the prostituted – and seen how ordinary they are, seen as kind and friendly they are outside of prostitution.

I know most punters become invisible because they are able to put all their violence into the prostituted, and then get on with their lives as if nothing important has happened.

For by making prostitution normal, we have made a culture said that violence is nothing, if anything just male leisure.

Look at the violence done to prostituted all the time.

See that our murders only are made to count if done in a mass. That our murders are not recorded, not made into statistics, we are just thrown away.

We heard about deaths from domestic violence, we record women and girl raped and murdered – but we have no memory for the prostituted who are murdered off the scale.

Only on occasion it may remember that prostituted women and girls are 18 times more likely to be murdered than any other group of women and girls.

We speak to rape when it done by acquaintances, by family, by partners, by close friends.

We gather round the raped and incested, and give sympathy and listen with an open mind.

It is considered if a woman has raped by more than ten men in her life.

But the prostituted class are forced out of the support given to rape survivors.

We have been raped by hundreds if not thousands of punters – but it appear the more rapists have conquer us, the more invisible that violence is made.

There is beginning to be concern about rape as a weapon of war – but there is no closing down of brothels, and other forms of prostitution in war zones.

To be prostituted, is to know you have little or no sympathy, understanding or interest in that you are living with extreme violence as your norm.

It is invisible violence done by invisible men in a society that firmly turns away.

Concrete Dreams

Posted on by rmott62

To be an abolitionist is be call a dreamer.

It is said it is and must be impossible to rid the world of prostitution – it just a fact of life, deal with it.

Well, as an exited woman who has the trauma of the sex trade under my skin, and acting as white noise each time I try to just get on with life.

As an exited woman who knew too many prostituted Sisters who could live –  women and girls that killed themselves, women and girls that lost their sanity with the loss of all hope, and women and girls who were murdered and never reported.

As an exited woman who had to block out too much of my life – block out the endless rapes, block out that torture was always there as a threat or a reality, block out how often I try to kill myself or was nearly murdered.

I have to dream and be part of making concrete that abolition of the sex trade must be a reality.

I hear and see every day justifications for the sex trade.

Do you justify pre-medicated murders, do you justify torture of political prisoners – heck would you justify wearing fur ripped from live animals?

I doubt you would – but many who fight for torture of men, torture of animals, rape and torture of women and girls outside the sex trade – decide it is different for the prostituted class.

Take as an example too many Leftists, anarchists, people who claim to be freedom fighters.

How many of these so-called allies are prefer to let the prostituted class be destroyed, as long as they can keep their supply of “alternative” and have access to “sex workers.

Hell, many of these “allies” have become profiteers in the sex trade, and have manipulated Leftist language to paint the veneer of being the good guys.

According to the Left, the only reason porn and prostitution was bad was coz it was run by the Right, and kept only for rich white men.

The Left want to open porn and prostitution, make it democratic – well mainly still for the Leftist brothers, but it a common habit of Leftist men to put women forward to promote the joys of being inside porn and being prostituted.

The Left is hand-in-glove with the sex trade, they are swopping language and how to be more effective in keeping the status quo of the sex trade.

That is why we live now in a surreal world of sex work.

We now speak of choice as only being with the prostituted class. We have to make invisible that the vast majority of the prostituted have no access to the language of no.

We make invisible that the vast majority of the prostituted live with rape, torture and being murdered with saying it is ok coz it is decided that being paid is to give full consent.

And most important, we make invisible that the only real choice is for the punter who make the choice to buy another human for his sexual greed. It is the punter who make the choice how much violence he uses on the prostitute, or how extreme the porn he consumes will be.

It is the punter who make the choice to make the prostituted class sub-human, and his only reason is he decide he cannot wank off without the added destruction of the prostituted woman or girl.

It is the sex trade profiteers that make choices – they choose what sadistic acts they will allowed to be done to their property, they choose where and how the prostituted are consumed, and they choose what women and girls to sell to increase their hold on the market.

How can anyone on the Left make excuses for the sex trade – it is clearly naked capitalism and exploitation, it is genocide with the weapons of brainwashing, tortures, rapes and murder.

What reason do you have to say that is ok?

Can you only have swallow dreams, so you given up thinking that the prostituted can not have full humanity and true freedom.

Or is it that you think it is just sex – and think that your sexual greed is more important than the rights of the prostituted class – are you really that selfish?

Well, look carefully at your sex work utopia, see from the eyes of an exited woman.

I hear and read the Left imagine that unions will cure all evils inside the sex trade. I think you dream that these unions are run by the prostituted, you imagine that then the prostituted will be truly respected and made safe.

You refuse to believe that unions are pointless inside the sex trade.

It is not work – it is slavery, so unions do nothing.

But in reality, unions that do exist are fully control and run by those who profiteer from the sex trade, most sex work unions fight for the rights of punters and pimps, and still view the prostituted as goods.

Stop dreaming of sex worker unions – dream harder, and see a world where the prostituted class have full dignity, are living with structured ways to exit, and seen as full humans not goods.

Dream into abolition, stand by your prostituted Sisters and hear and see our desire for real freedom.

Listen and hear the pain of being inside the sex trade, listen and hear the grief we have – stop speaking over, instead and through the prostituted class.

 

Digging Deeper

Posted on by rmott62

I am finding writing very hard, for my pain and grief is very terrible.

I could joke that is my football team Arsenal are such rubbish, I could joke it is just self-indulgent self-pity.

I would joke if it would hide the tears and agony that I have. Only I cannot laugh even to myself.

I could watch TV till my ears bleed, I could turn up my music so loud and dance hoping to forget, I could go out and walk myself to exhaustion.

But I know none of that works, for I can never run away from myself.

So instead, I turn to writing, to finding a kind of expression – to digging deeper and finding peace with my tortured prostituted self.

That is the centre of my pain and grief – I have could to accept that I, and the majority of the prostituted class, were or are being tortured.

It is torturing on a scale that explores my mind, it is a torturing that has been made acceptable for the vast majority of human existence.

The torturing of the prostituted is in every continent, in every city, it is more than in your street.

The prostituted who were or are being tortured are from any culture, any class, any background – though the targeted are mainly poor women, abused girls from all backgrounds, ethic minorities, indigenous girls and women.

But those who profiteer from torturing the prostituted will target any woman or girl to feed the demand for endless variety and yet more money.

The men that tortured the prostituted will ignore or get their kicks from any signs she is vulnerable – be it signs of any addiction, be it injuries on her body, be her need for the money, be it that violent pimps are close by.

The torturing of the prostituted has been so normal for so many centuries and across so many cultures – that it is has been made invisible or re-branded as male leisure.

Well, I dig deeper into what torture means to me.

Torture on the scale that it was done to me and to the majority of the prostituted leads to having fragmented memory.

This is for many varied reasons. But two reasons are common for the prostituted.

Our mind find it hard to hold on to the “unspeakable” sexual acts that punters choose to do to us.

We were made into goods that those men place all their hate-fueled porn dreams into.

Porn is no fantasy to the prostituted class – we have the close impossible sex acts of mainstream porn poured into our minds and bodies.

Some of you reading this blog may close away porn as fantasy, that as fantasy it can be made harm-free and a release for men.

You may see or know of porn, and think that must be impossible without pain or danger.

Well, my body is full of those sex acts. Those impossible acts are forced into the bodies of the prostituted on the street, in cars, in hotels, in flats, in brothels and wherever else punters know they can torture without consequences.

Pain is beyond feelings or language – when your norm is being choked as fists, objects and penises are too deep down your throat; when your norm is anal rape with no warning, with god know what in there; when being strangled is so regular is become unimportant; when being raped as drowning is just another game.

Porn and prostitution feed off each other – that is the knowledge inside every exited woman, it is inside our skin.

So dig deeper.

Let yourself imagine what it is to be a long-term prostitute.

Imagine that you are rape so often, that you lose the language of that your body belongs to you, that you have no idea what consent means.

To be a prostitute is to have no access to the freedom to say no.

The second major reason for having fragmented memory, is that most torture for the prostituted is repeated many many times.

That endless repeating is survived by not remembering as separate events, but remembering it as one event and then closing down.

Punters may think they are inventive in how they torture the prostitute, may imagine that they are highly original – they are not, for in the end it is limited what you do to the female body.

Yes, many punters pushed the bodies and minds of the prostituted to the point of death, yes, often actually punters kill the prostitute.

But all forms of torturing the prostituted were used up many centuries ago – all that has changed is what technology is used to be part of torture.

But all ways to torture are mostly focused on finding and destroying every hole in the prostitute’s body, in doing everything possible to wreck her throat, in destroying and conquering her vagina and anus, in making her polluted by his porn dream, in controlling every cell of her body – and hopefully her freedom to have thoughts of her own.

That is how punters and profiteers view the prostituted – and that is the foundations of prostitution since it was invented.

So it not surprising prostitution repeats itself.

I have dug deep enough for now.

Been Too Hard to Write

Posted on by rmott62

I need to try to write, I have not been able to all week.

I think the only way to deal with this blocking and blankness, is to face it head-on. I will enter my subconscious and let it flow.

I cannot write because of hate bringing fear into my heart.

I cannot write because I know I tortured, and I don’t want to know that.

I cannot write because my heart is broken as I and so many great exited speak out so clearly, and still the prostituted are being destroyed in their millions.

I cannot write as rage, grief and confusion grows stronger the more I write, it such a crap form of therapy.

But, there are so many buts – the buts that mean I write even as despair grab hold of me.

I look directly into those who hate that exited women have a voice – I look and see as fear fades slowly.

I see women inside porn and/or prostitution who are surviving by clinging hold tight to hate. I see they cannot know their own pain, their own fury and that it is a world built to keep them confuse.

I know I was that hater when I was embedded inside the sex trade, I hear and feel my own words and actions to push away all those who may me wonder if I was happy, made me think I may be trapped and it was not my choice.

I had to hate all those voices, I had to not know my own reality.

How would I survived if I had known I had no power, only the illusion given by punters that I had some choices left.

How would I survived if I had fully known that I did not enjoy pain and degradation – only I had trained myself to block out that it was my body that was being tortured.

Tell me how does any prostitute or woman inside porn survive if she fully knows her own reality.

The fact is most of the prostituted class in every aspect of the sex trade do not and will not know their reality – they have many ways to not know, all are vital to get through somehow.

Many turn to drugs and drink, many self-harm in an almost robot ways, many learn to stop thinking outside the sex trade.

All most closed down their individuality, must forget they had a past, must never believe too much in a future – for basic survival.

To be inside the sex trade, is not be allowed an essence, but to learn fast to be whatever role punters, consumers and profiteers want you to be.

No wonder most of the prostituted class fall into blocking out all that reminds them of their own humanity.

This can be through constant aggression to any person who seek the person beyond the prostitution, this may a desperate holding to believing it was all your own free choices even as you feel traps killing you.

I feel deep sorrow for the women inside the sex trade who hate exited women. I love them whatever they say or do, for I know they have no choice but to hate and speak the language of their oppressor – for to do otherwise may destroy them too fast.

I do not want more suicides, there are far too every day from the sex trade.

The deep sorrow of being exited is holding inside our hearts the many women and girls we know who committed suicide.

I do not know of any exited woman who did know prostituted Sisters who committed suicide.

We tread very carefully with women inside the sex trade, for we know how fragile they are – even inside great anger, inside deeply hurtful comments, inside many lies said – we always love and hold each and every women and girl inside the sex trade.

For we were them, and they are us.

But I do not have this compassion for the majority of haters of exited women, for most are not innocence, but are fuelled by the desire to keep the prostituted class sub-human, and a constant flow of these sub-human goods to keep the sex trade making huge profits.

Many will label themselves as sex workers – when in reality they are sex trade profiteers.

Many will say they are “supporters” of sex workers – when in reality they are punters.

Many will write books and build academic careers by saying over and over how harm-free prostitution and porn can be made.

All these haters have vested interest in silencing exited women – or at less ridiculing our multiple voices.

Do not fall the sex work propaganda, know it just the voices of the sex trade and the desire to make the prostituted class sub-human.

There is no humanity in preaching sex work, the only purpose is to make profit for those who have no heart.

How can I write when I know I, and the vast majority of the prostituted class, live inside extreme torture and it was our norm.

How do you write to that without breaking , without losing hope, without entering the familiar place of self-hate.

All I know is to write, to write to the pain, to write when my brain and stomach said no more please no more.

Writing is not fun, writing is not therapy, writing does not give easy solutions.

Writing to the truth is to write into that pain, and by writing find that somewhere deep and hidden the warrior spirit was just waiting to find a language.

A language that does not run away from what being tortured means to the prostituted mind and body – not as others say it must be, not inside the language of statistics or comparisons to other forms of male violence, not in the language of entertainment or labour – no, in a language forged and drag out of the prostituted class.

It is a language of impacted torture, torture made so normal and everyday that it is made into deadness.

It is a language with fragmented memory, where torture were repeated so often and use on a regular basic, that the mind makes it one event.

It is a language without a sense of time, without a place to focus on, without how many men did the torturing – for it was too often, there were too many places or all places felt the same, and it impossible to know how many men when the mind survives by losing count.

It is said one rape is too many – than how does an exited find a language for rapes in the thousands.

Our silence is deafening.

This is a short post when so much is hurting me and my prostituted Sisters.

Don’t Believe the Lies

Posted on by rmott62

To write as an exited woman is to live with constant lies being said all round you.

The vast majority of these lies are not misunderstandings or simple different points of view. The lies are vicious weapons used by those who want to keep the status quo of the sex trade.

Many who lie about exited women are those who profiteer from exploiting the prostituted class, many are punters wanting to justify that they making the prostituted into goods for their sexual greed, many are prostituted women who speak the language of their oppressor.

All lies spoken about exited women do not come from innocent place – it comes from a place of wanting to control exited women, it comes from a place that views all the prostituted as sub-human goods, it comes from a place where all male violence is made invisible, and it comes from a place of deep contempt for anyone who dares to even think it is wrong to have a prostituted class.

So why do so many believe the lies that are spread daily about exited women? Could it be that to believe the lies, gives you yet another excuse to be apathetic, as the prostituted class is being destroyed.

A common lie with many variations is we were never “real” prostitutes, or we make up stuff for attention.

Or we may have been prostituted – but not as we say we were.

It has been decided without any evidence, that if I was a prostitute, I was a web-cam girl, and no violence ever happened to me.

I just write this blog coz I am a vicious man-hater, and my long-term plan is to make all prostituted women starve to death.

I have never had real sex with a man, so I don’t know anything.

These are common lies said about all exited women who have the courage and determination to speak their truths and fight for abolition.

And some of you choose to believe such desperate lies – rather than honouring the bravery of exited women.

I say shame on you.

Why would we lie or even make up the violence we have known.

I would say if I was to make a past for myself or my exited Sisters, it would a past with no male violence, a past without the concept of buying and selling the prostituted class, a past where we had time and space to dream and grow.

It  would not be a past where we were made into toilets for all male porn fantasies, it would not be a past that was so full of hate and violence that we survived by blocking as much as possible out, it would be a past where death became our only true friend.

Why would any human lie into that world?

I suppose if you decide we must be liars – then you make yourself detached from the conditions of prostitution , from its ordinary violence, hate and degradation – by making the choice to decide that exited women must be mentally ill, or too damaged to know their own truths.

You can put us into a box, and turn away from the suffering of the prostituted and pass on to more important issue.

As you walk away, you putting joy into the hearts of sex trade profiteers  for the less the public gaze is focus on the conditions inside the sex trade, the more they can carry on business as usual.

Business as usual is the torturing, mass raping and murdering of the prostituted class.

The sex trade profiteers are laughing at you, if you make the choice to believe their lies.

They want to think all exited women are mentally ill, or too damaged to know their own reality.

They will pretend to care about our mental welfare – only to point out how we don’t facts, cannot remember details, and speak too vaguely to be believed.

They will paint the words of exited women as “stories”, laying down seeds that we speak fiction.

Always, the bottom line is if we work for them or their friendly local sex trade profiteer, we would find that being a whore is just fun, empowering and deeply feminist.

They will tell exited women how we do not understand how there many variations to being a prostitute – sorry, sex worker.

That we were just very unlucky, when in their lies they will most of the prostituted can be made into Happy Hookers.

All that is needed is to place all prostitution indoors, get sex workers unions, have simple health and safety precautions – and of course put women in front as spoke- people.

This is utter bullshit – but liberals and leftists fall for it every day.

All the language of sex work is never about the safety and dignity of the prostituted – it always to protect the punters, and get even more profits for pimps/businessmen that run the sex trade.

Unions are fake – and are open to pimps and punters, so silence all voices that may speak out for human dignity for the prostituted.

All so-called safety precautions are for show – for there is no ending of rapes, no ending of torturing, and no ending of getting away with murdering prostitutes.

Why do think prostitution can be made empowering, why do need slavery to be re-branded as sex work, and why are sucker in by the use of the word “union”?

Could it be that in the depths of your heart, and the back of your mind – you believe the prostituted are sub-human, so if you pack it away into sex work, you have a free conscience to abandon the prostituted to genocide, imaging it all fine now.

There so many lies spread about exited women – we could just cry, just give up  – but we don’t.

The more lies that are spread – the stronger we get, and the more we have deep solidarity with all the prostituted of all countries and all times.

 

In the Veins of the Tortured

Posted on by rmott62

Torture is something I don’t want to know.

Torture was my norm for too many years, but I close it down, send it away.

I think if I shut my eyes tight enough, then I was mentally, sexually and physically made into trash.

I squeeze my eyes so hard – there is a pain and all I see is red turning into black.

With eyes closed, my veins remember all that was to be tortured.

I want to run away, I want to stay silent, I want not to know my own reality.

Only I cannot as the blood in my veins is on fire.

I know to keep a handle of my mental and physical welfare, I must enter my tortured soul.

I will pause first to say why I do this in public.

I do this because I am just a tiny example of how all the prostituted live inside torture – I am not just some sad story, my tortures are in all aspects of prostitution in every country, my tortures are done to prostitutes from all backgrounds and all cultures.

I would I was torture somewhere in the middle of how the prostituted are  treated – there are some prostituted who have little but never knew sadism as their norm, and there many far too many prostituted who are tortured several times worse than I was, many who lived inside torture for close to a lifetime.

I was “lucky” – I did not die from the violence that is prostitution.

I was not murdered by punters pushing my body beyond all limits, I was not murdered because whores are viewed as throwaways, I was not murdered by profiteers to place fear into other prostitutes.

I was not made to disappeared with no-one looking or caring I was gone.

I never succeeded in my many suicide attempts, as I swallowed pills, cut inside my cunt and arms, as I dreamt of many ways to kill myself.

I could not cry as women I wanted to love killed themselves – I just wonder how they manage to escape.

I was lucky that my body did not just give up and die.

Yes, it was wrecked so much that pain was so ordinary I walked through it.

Pain was everywhere that I never notice a burst appendix till I was being poisoned, and had to be in hospital for a week.

Pain was so normal that did not know how to look after myself, just repeat more pain on top in order to stop thinking.

I was walking into hell – but all I could do was not know I was human, than nothing would matter, I made sure nothing mattered – then somehow I was alive.

How could I know my reality. Tell me – would you want to know what I lived.

Tell me you not blocked out all reality, tell me you would not convince yourself that it was alright coz you choose pain.

Tell me you would not decide you deserve pain, that you were nothing an object to be fucked and never allowed to be human.

Would you not want to say it was empowerment, not want to believe it must off been freely chosen.

Would you not refuse to call it prostitution, or say it may prostitution but the nice kind.

Damned it, would not refuse reality out sheer will to survive by any means.

I like nearly all indoors prostitutes, survive partly by re-framing the violence, by taking all the blame onto myself, by imaging the punters did not mean it or I wanted to be made into trash.

The shock and deep grief o being an exited woman, is knowing how I had to lied to myself to somehow keep breathing.

It is devastating to know that as a prostituted woman, I had no power, no rights to any safety, no access to dignity – to know I was viewed as a slave, as a sub-human.

How do you live with the knowledge that every torture put into my mind and body was pre-planned, and no words or actions I did would stop their plans.

Each punter that torture me, know what he do before he had enter the room or put down the money.

He had a porn script in his head as he thought I will buy sex now.

My words and actions were invisible to the punter, for I was just his cartoon whore – he could do as much violence as he wants, knowing I was never real.

Nothing was being done to nothing.

Most of the sadism done to my prostituted body, was done because it made into fantasy and entertainment.

Most violent punters would never dream of being sadist to the non-prostituted , to women they view as real, women who may have real pain or may even fight back.

Violent punters often want to be the good guys in the public gaze, many are gentlemen to women they view as real.

The terrible truth is many sadist punters keep their hate and violence only for the prostituted class – in the full knowledge that the prostituted will be thrown away and no-one cares that they exist.

My tortured prostituted self knows each and every torture done to me was viewed as a non-crime, that prostitutes deserved it coz they are just evil women.

I could scream, I could weep, I could bang my head into a wall at how men can buy and sell the prostituted, can endlessly torture us – because most people make the choice to say it cannot be real torture, maybe call it the hazard of the work.

Well, enter my body, enter my veins – and see if you dismiss that it is torture.

Enter my throat, enter a world that cannot breathe deep with choking. Enter how I live with feeling I am drowning.

Know my throat was tortured countless times, know it was more than one penis forced down so deep, I would faint and wake up into drowning.

Know fists were forced down my throat, know as face was shoved into water choking was my norm.

Know I was strangled on a regular basis – the game of life and death was my norm.

Enter my head and stomach, as fists fly into them, as I was thrown against walls, as I thrown into the ground, even thrown out of cars.

Be my body in those places of humiliation, and tell I was not right to act hard, and survive by not having space to care.

Enter my anus, my anus that is so terrified to feel or know it is real.

My anus was raped beyond times that my brain wants to count.

My anus screams that it was tortured beyond hope, my anus would weep if it did not hurt so much to be that alive.

My anus has know what evil is.

Enter my cunt, enter the prostituted cunt – don’t turn away, don’t compare to the raped cunt, don’t make it safe by framing it academic speech or statistics.

Face with an open mind and heart, my prostituted cunt, and be a witness to the tortures that is every vein of that cunt.

Know that cunt has been penetrated by countless penises – often in one night, so many the cunt losing all feeling, all memory – all that is left is a hole that should be part of me.

Know that cunt is ripped apart by teeth, pulled beyond its limits by hands or fists, know it will know what objects are forced in it.

To be prostituted is to know your cunt is made into a playground for all male hatred and rage.

I was lucky, my body only has body memories, I got no long-term physical damage or sexual diseases.

I have some rips, I got pregnant a few times, had short-term sexual diseases.

I was very lucky.

I just have extreme trauma and survivor’s guilt.