Paperback 614: The Ordeal of Private Heath / Jeb Stuart (Pyramid 106)

Paperback 614: Pyramid Books 116 (1st ptg, 1953)

Title: The Ordeal of Private Heath
Author: Jeb Stuart
Cover artist: [Julian Paul]

Yours for: $11


Best things about this cover:

• "Your knees ... I can't hear anything ... I CAN'T HEAR ANYTHING!!!"
• Knee fetishism—truly "the gravest sin"!
• He likes it when you rub his head and tickle his underarm.
• I love her expression. "O, look at the spotlights. Why can't I be out at a movie premiere instead of stuck in this dank apartment grooming my shell-shocked boyfriend? I should've married that Bill Rivers when I had the chance."
• I also love the way she is lit. Gives the painting the feeling of a religious tableau — from one of the sillier Bible stories, perhaps.

Best things about this back cover:

• The front cover suggested it, the back cover suggests it more strongly, and a very quick perusal of contents of the book confirms it—"less than a man" = "queer."
• How many years had gone by since the publication of "A Farewell to Arms" and how bad were the war novels in that period?
• Interior blurb from James Michener. Also, the Binghamton Press. So, you know ... heavy hitters.
• "If you dislike stark realism, this book is not for you"—actual warning printed opposite title page. Heart of Starkness!
• The Louisville Courier-Journal says "Will be compared with The Naked and the Dead"; I'm guessing the publishers left off the "... and found wanting" part.

Page 123~

"You looked like a lion," she said.

"A lion," he said dryly, humorlessly. "A sad-looking lion indeed."

"An unhappy lion," she answered, getting up from the floor and seating herself beside him, touching his cheek, saying, "I will not ask questions."

A woman who knows her lions and stays out of your business. Sexy!

~RP

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Paperback 520: Tales of the South Pacific / James A. Michener (Pocket Books 516)

Paperback 520: Pocket Books 516 (16th-18th ptg, 1950)

Title: Tales of the South Pacific
Author: James A. Michener
Cover artist: Harvey Kidder

Yours for: $5


Best things about this cover:

• "I ... uh ... I forget why I came in here."
• "My eyes are up here" doesn't really work when you're topless.
• I liked the Kangaroo better when it had a joey in its pouch. This "book boner" incarnation is disturbing.

Best things about this back cover:

• Whoa, someone's got a military fetish. I'm looking at you, K.C. Clapp.
• "Balinese lasses" is not the kind of phrase you are likely to see ... ever. Unless there are Balinese in Ireland.
• "Bali laughs" is so terrible I literally laughed.

Page 123~

As in a trance, Cable sucked in his breath audibly. The girl smiled, and at that moment Cable heard a hissing noise. He turned around, frightened. But it was only bloody Mary. She had her peach-basket hat in her left hand. Stains of betel juice were drenching the ravines of her mouth, which was grinning, broadly. Her broken teeth showed through, black, black as night. She winked her right eye heavily and asked, "You like?" Then she turned and fled down the path.

Ah, natives. So droll. So quaint. So exotic. Just a moment of local color before our hero has sex with an underage prostitute ... who is a virgin ... who will cry immediately after. You know, the way men do. "The regrets and moral questionings would come later."

~RP

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Paperback 246: The Disenchanted / Budd Schulberg (Bantam A1051)

Paperback 246: Bantam A1051 (1st ptg, 1952)

Title: The Disenchanted
Author: Budd Schulberg
Cover artist: Harry Schaare

Yours for: $11


Best things about this cover:

• Her pose! One shoe! Awesome. I think I love her.
  
• Book should be called "The Dissolute," or "Yeah, I'm Drunk, Whaddya Gonna Do About It, Ya Impotent Bastard? Get Me Another Martini"
• Harry Schaare Loves his Floating Heads — we'll see more in the future.
• Love the little maniacal dancing / jazz club scene in the background
• The novel may be set in the 20s, but these people are not believably from the 20s. Except for emaciated Clark Gable in a tux back there, hitting on the girl who's reclining on the hair of Floating Head. He's 20s all the way.
• "What Makes Sammy Run" is a classic Hollywood novel. Fantastic.

Best things about this back cover:

• LOVE the guy admiring the rack of his drunken lady friend, up-close! "Yes. These will do nicely."
• Toga party or religious visitation? "This angel came into my candle-lit room last night ... man, she was hot."
• I love Michener's precision — like he remembers exactly where he was, three years ago, when he read a novel better than this one.

Page 123~

When he finds out the commercial tie-up he feels like a jerk for having fallen for her. Then, in the finals of the ski-jump, he's injured.

~RP

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