Don’t know if this is an appropriate comment, but I’ve got a real life real shit test example from before I married when my eventual wife played this shit test on me and timed it like a pro.
Early on, she’s hassling me about unprotected sex that didn’t go her way, and decides to fuck with me. I’m already pretty stressed out trying to find a job for after I graduate college, and I need a “head shot” for the college recruiter’s file. I ask her to take a few photos, nothing special, just me against a plain wall, and she takes this moment to tell me she’s missed her period. She’s fucking lying through her teeth, deadpan, totally smooth, and has me completely blindsided. I respond, “Let’s finish these photos first.” She proceeds to take the only pictures of me on earth that give the impression I’m anything but the most relaxed guy you’ve ever met. I look completely doomed, like somebody just told me I’ve got 10 minutes before I die from internal bleeding.
Now, I think it is worth noting that I’m now married to that shrewd and clever woman and my children are smarter than yours, so perhaps I “passed” the shit test, though, to be honest, all I recall saying after the truth was revealed (she let me off the hook after taking the pictures) was something similar to, “You really shouldn’t tease somebody who’ll have you’re back.”



