generations

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Generational Curse

I love the Psalms and Proverbs. King David was the perfect example of a sinful man who found redemption and won God’s heart. But, the consequences of his sins (divorce, adultery, murder) followed him the rest of his life through his children. It’s the same with all of us. While only the Lord can save us from eternal hell, give us mercy and forgiveness, and heal our hearts, we still live daily with the consequences of our failures. But… God gives us His grace and wholeness through His peace to handle every sticky situation!

I’ve now lived long enough and observed many people to be able to verify, with those few exceptions of course, that the sins of the fathers (and mothers) most definitely pass down to the children. The Bible was right after all! It’s true that kids will do as parents do and ignore what they say. That’s a shame, really. By the time a parent is a grandparent, they usually know what NOT to do! We could learn a lot, and avoid a ton of mistakes, if we surrounded ourselves with a few older and wiser mentors. But instead, society drags downward with each generation. Our society has forgotten basic biblical history, and is now very far from God. Offense over the least little thing and bitterness toward parents for not fulfilling unrealistic expectations have destroyed our relationships. We have no unity. Pray for reconciliation for all our families!

My boys had a male high school teacher who told me he could point out every student in his class that came from a single parent home without ever looking at their files. He went on to say that he could tell how awful the father treated the mother by the son’s disrespectful attitude toward authority. Back then, I thought he was arrogant and preposterous! Looking back, the teacher was right.

What attitudes and habits are we passing down to the next generation? Don’t worry, we have all failed. Even though our society loves to blame-shift our failures to the previous generation, their failures came from the generation before them! None of us are any less guilty than the previous generation. In my family, though dysfunctional, my parents never divorced, but both sets of grandparents were divorced, as were my great-grandparents, and a couple of great-great-grandparents! We can find fault in our parents (forefathers) all the way back 6,000 years! Where does it end? With us? When will we stop blame-shifting? God’s word says each of us is only condemned for our own sins, not what others think or do. (See Deuteronomy 24:16, 2 Kings 14:6, Jeremiah 31:30, and Ezekiel 18:20.) Our society regresses with each generation, which was predicted for the end of the age. Parents are turning on children, children turning on parents, and over minuscule offenses! (See Luke 12:53) When will we learn to forgive? When will we return to the Lord?

Where does it stop?

  • Generation Alpha (early 2013–present) blames Gen-Z
  • The Zoomer/Gen-Z (1997–2012) blames the Millennial
  • The Millennial/Gen-Y (1981–1996) blames Generation X
  • Generation X (1965-1980) blames the Baby Boomer
  • The Baby Boomer (1946–1964) blames the Silent Generation
  • The Silent Generation (1928-1945) blames the Greatest/GI Generation
  • The Greatest/GI Generation (1901-1927) blames the Interbellum/Lost Generation
  • The Interbellum/Lost Generation (1883-1900) blames the…

Where do we STOP THE CYCLE and start fresh?

“No weapon formed against you shall prosper,
And every tongue which rises against you in judgment
You shall condemn.
This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord,
And their righteousness is from Me,”
Says the Lord. ~Isaiah 54:17

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Your Daily Proverb ~ 10:7 (Are you a blessing??)

I have at least three things I really need to be doing right now…

  • Clean this pigsty house, for my mom-in-law is coming to town…tomorrow!
  • Laundry…because sometimes we need clean underwear!
  • Fix dinner…because my man usually needs to eat…maybe…

But…here I sit…writing. I had a brainstorm. **Sigh**

I picked a daily proverb this morning for my proverbial Facebook post that had not been posted in the past: Proverbs 10:1. A couple of hours later, I received word from a good friend that a former co-worker had just passed away. After hearing of her death, the 7th verse, one I have often quoted, is all that runs through my mind.

“…but the name of the wicked will rot.” (Proverbs 10:7)

Oh yes… I remember my old co-worker. All I can say is I hope and pray, after they found the cancer, that she took the time to make amends with whomever she was continually infuriated with. Even more so, I pray she made amends with Jesus. Hopefully, before she passed away, she found forgiveness (My Thoughts on Forgiveness) for herself and others. The sad thing is, even though we have no right to judge her or guess where she is now, my memories of her character are so negative, my hope for a positive afterlife is not very…hopeful. Then again, do we really know? I can imagine the office atmosphere now is, how shall we say tactfully, lighter? I myself have been accused at times of being a grump at work. We all have bad days now and then. But we’re able to get over ourselves and bounce right back to our usual cheerfulness. And then there’s that one…

That grump, day in and day out, who is always irritated at nearly everything. That one co-worker, friend, or relative who ravages peace and thrives on hate.

How will future generations hold our memory?

  • Will they reminisce about our laughter?
  • Will they see our lies, unforgiveness, and rage?
  • Or, will our memory be wrapped in forgiveness, love, and kindness?

As we pass into the abyss of history, our future generations will only identify our name as either good or bad. The only thing that will matter a hundred years from now is the character we leave behind. Not a single physical thing, only our character.

Will our memory be a blessing or a curse??

Will all this drama really matter a hundred years from now?

Will all this drama really matter a hundred years from now?

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**Highlights in color are links for more information.

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The Marriage Controversy…Not a very popular topic…

I’ve seen a few posts lately about divorce causing more destruction to the breakdown of the family unit than same-sex marriage. I agree. After a couple of “fun” posts, here we are on a more serious note… and my mind seems to be jumbled tonight. I guess my thoughts are about the disintegrating family, divorce, same-sex marriage, and blame-shifting: not very popular topics in today’s world.

At this point, I should say that if you do not believe in God, you won’t agree with this post. And that’s fine; I am not your judge, nor do I want to be. Though I’m surely not perfect, these are my beliefs. You are welcome to disagree and leave a comment. ;)

The biggest problem, as I see it, with both the world and the church is the inability to be able to differentiate between the sin and the person. The world would have us believe that to accept the person, we have to accept the sin. The church traditionally believed the person is the same as the sin, and both are unacceptable. The modern church has shifted to accepting the sin in the name of tolerance. Yet, Jesus always loved the person while condemning the sin. And then… there’s the argument over what constitutes sin.

Since I am one who questions everything and tries to get to the source, or the bottom, of every issue, where is the progression? How far down will the “Christian” family fall? Where will it end? To figure that out, maybe we should think about where it began: in the garden, with the beginning and fall of mankind, otherwise referred to as “original sin,” with its root in the love of self.

In the world of roping, a three-stranded cord cannot be easily broken. The typical Christian family consists of a dad, mom, and child—a three-stranded cord. This phenomenon is synonymous with the picture God gave in the Trinity; Father, Son, and Holy Spirit: Three in one. Where does this foundation originate? From the beginning, from Genesis, it originates from scrolls, which have existed for centuries and been proven over and over.

Unfortunately, in our politically correct society, any comment contrary to an acceptance of homosexuality is deemed as hate and bigotry. Most don’t understand how to hate the sin while loving the person. Any comment contrary to divorce being a normal part of life is deemed as antiquarian. In reality, divorce has done more to destroy the foundational family unit than the gay marriage issue. I should know; I’ve been through the hell of divorce.

But do we really want to find out what God thinks? Most don’t. Jesus himself said, “Not everyone can accept this word.” ~Matthew 19:11 Most Liberal Christians dismiss the Old Testament, using the excuse that the Cross changed everything while ignoring the words of Jesus, “… I have not come to abolish them [the laws] but to fulfill them.” ~Matthew 5:17-20

Then there is the argument that Jesus did not specifically talk against homosexuality. Yet, Jesus talked a lot about “sexual immorality” which was understood as being anything outside of marriage.

Scripture teaches that when it comes to “sexual sin,” anyone who was not a complete virgin when they married is guilty. Period. And these days, that pretty much encompasses almost all of us! We’re all guilty. So, there you have it. That, in and of itself, should sum up any and every argument. No? Well then…

Basically, God said man is to leave mom and dad and cleave to his wife and become one. He did not say for a man to cleave to his husband or a wife to cleave to her wife. The Old Testament is clear that marriage was between male and female. Jesus reiterated the same scriptures in the new testament: “Have you not read that at the beginning, the Creator made them male and female, and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? ” ~Matthew 19:4-5 & Genesis 2:24

Liberal Christians tend to not believe in the literal Bible or the individual interpretations of what God did and did not want. They argue that actions do not affect others and who marries and who doesn’t marry is only their business. They proclaim if we do not accept the homesexual lifestyle, that we do not accept the person, when nothing could be farther from the truth. As a result, our courts are creating laws against our Constitution thereby changing our society. Our government did not define marriage; God did.

So where does the gay agenda lead? Where does the progression stop? Where do we draw the line? Isn’t the basis of the homosexual movement about financial “rights” or “equality”? Money. Facts show homosexuals are not monogamous. It doesn’t take deep research to find that most people in the homosexual lifestyle got there due to abuse and pain in their past. Hurt people hurt people. I myself hate “churchy” people, and it is true, we are to love God and our neighbor above all else. But just like a parent will teach his child right vs. wrong and lead them to that which is in their best interest, out of love, are we to accept actions contrary to God’s righteousness? Is it in society’s best interest to show truth in love? Is love in truth? Where the conservatives and the church have failed is to maintain love for the person while not accepting behavior that is destructive. You don’t throw out the baby with the bathwater. Acceptance without compromise was the quest of Jesus. He showed love to the outcast, and followed by telling them to stop sinning. He never compromised. Not only that, but He always accepted the sinner without accepting the sin. I’ve had gay friends, I’ve had divorced friends, and I’ve had religious friends. Believe it or not, even though He hates our sin, God loves each and every person.

This leads back to my first question: where does all this acceptance mentality lead? I think the evidence of that is coming. This article states, “Earlier this year two psychologists in Canada declared that pedophilia is a sexual orientation just like homosexuality or heterosexuality.” Pedophiles now want the same rights as homosexuals. So, is bestiality next?? Gay marriage proponents claim pedophiles are a whole different discussion and would affect someone, namely the child, whereas a homosexual marriage does not affect anyone but the couple. On the surface, this sounds sound, but it is bent and deceiving. While the child is directly impacted by a pedophile, children of same-sex homes are just as ruinously affected, as well as children of divorce, etc. To say any action does not influence the next person is both naive and irresponsible. Does creating a law of acceptance deem the action morally right? Lest we forget, slavery was once legal and socially acceptable. “No man can give me the right to do what is wrong.” ~Abraham Lincoln

In 2 Peter 2:4-10 we are told that God did not spare angels of the ancient world before the flood, nor Sodom and Gomorrah as they are examples of what is going to happen to the ungodly. Jesus said in Luke 17:22-37 that the end times will be as the days of Lot and describes what will happen. Jude 1:7 says Sodom and Gomorrah gave themselves up to sexual immorality and perversion, which translates homosexuality. The people living in Jesus’ day understood the concept of the destruction of Sodom & Gomorrah, so I’m sure Jesus did not feel the need to go into detail. The account of Lot and the fate of Sodom and Gomorrah can be found in Genesis 19. Abraham pleaded for his nephew’s life, so God sent two angels, in the form of men, to bring Lot out before the towns were destroyed. In verse 5, the men of the town surrounded the house and demanded Lot send the men out so they could have sex with them. Long story short, God rained down burning sulfur and destroyed the cities. It pretty much shows how God feels about that lifestyle! Even though God is a God of love, he is also a God of purity and justice. If you really want to find out what God’s word says about who ends up where, check out: Revelation 21:8, Revelation 22:15, & Revelation 22:18-19. Notice he says liars will be in the same place? One notable correlation: notice the names of the cities? These two names are the root of “sodomy,” from which the act of homosexuality comes, and “gonorrhea,” from sexual disease. Also take note that even though God pronounced a death judgment on the towns, in his grace, he did provide an escape for any who would leave. All but Lot and two of his daughters chose to stay, clinging to their depraved lifestyle. As with any sin or any lifestyle, God always provides a way out.

Beyond the gay marriage issue, the best way to destroy the family is to divide mom and dad. I don’t think I need to repeat statistics of divorce here; everyone knows the numbers are too high. To counter those stats, studies show that the generation now coming into adulthood (the Millennial Generation) prefers cohabitation to marriage. I can’t say that I don’t understand. I do. But though we know cohabitation (which leads to an even higher divorce rate) is not the answer, to a generation who grew up with no family foundation, it seems “safe.”

This post is growing like Jack & the Beanstalk, which turns off the short attention span of today’s readers. Therefore, I won’t go into the perils of divorce again here; my first two posts on this blog described the destruction divorce leaves in the family. {1st post here} {2nd post here} Basically, children look at the family unit as a reflection of the Godhead, the Trinity: God the Father, Jesus the marriage, and the Holy Spirit the glue of the family unit (Eph. 5:22-33). In divorce, no matter what the cause, the family is split, and the Holy Spirit is severed. The Godhead correlation is distorted. The children’s security in the unity they once rested in has disappeared. The consequence is a warped view of what constitutes love. Children lose sight of God’s love for them when the love of the family grows cold. They wonder how God can love them when the example of the Godhead before them has split into two households.

Last question… just who is responsible for the destruction of the family and for the downfall of our society?

The Greatest or GI Generation is the generation born around WWI, from 1901 to 1927, coming of age during WWII. With the end of the Second World War, instead of women returning home from their war work posts, women donned high heels and stayed in the workforce, creating the first latchkey children, the Silent Generation. The generations after the war saw divorce skyrocket, bringing about the first major separation of the family. So, that’s it. By the time the sexual revolution of the 1960s entered society, the Silent Generation fell slack in their responsibility to the family. Therefore, it can’t be the same-sex marriage issue of today that has caused the distortion of the family. It can’t be the high divorce rate of generations today. Of course, it had to be the generation before, when Mom left the kids to babysitters, entered the workforce, birth control and abortion stopped large families, and men were no longer required to defend our nation. Eve blamed the serpent; Adam blamed Eve and God, leaving no one to take responsibility for any of our problems!

Who do our parents blame, their parents? Who do their parents blame… their parents?

  • Generation Alpha (2013–2024) blames Gen-Z
  • The Zoomers/Gen-Z (1997–2012) blames the Millennials
  • The Millennial/Gen-Y (1981–1996) blames Generation X
  • The Baby Bust/Gen-X (1965-1980) blames the Baby Boomers
  • The Baby Boomer (1946–1964) blames the Silent Generation
  • The Lucky Few/The Silent Generation (1928-1945) blames the Greatest/GI Generation
  • The Greatest/Interbellum/GI Generation (1901-1927) blames the Lost Generation
  • The Lost Generation (1883-1900) blames the…

(**See Reference links below)

And so on… do you see where this is going?

It couldn’t be my generation’s fault!

Society attempts to lessen the devastation of divorce by blame-shifting responsibility for the destruction of the Christian culture to the prior generation. The downward turn increases with each subsequent generation. Just as Eve blamed the serpent and Adam blamed Eve and God, each generation blames the prior generation, claiming their lack of commitment, lack of stability, that they were too strict, they were too lax, etc. After all, their parents were the ones who raised this dysfunctional generation!

And so on…

The last question should be, just how do we fix it??

I know I have been in sin, as has every human, but through Jesus’ death and resurrection we have salvation, a way out of hell. I wouldn’t want to call good that which we know in our hearts to be evil, just for the sake of political correctness. There is freedom only in truth. Only God can make a blind man see His truth, not your truth, not my truth. But we also need to be careful about “thumping” religion over their heads. God’s truth must be told in love, for only love covers a multitude of sins. God is a God of restoration. Forget the dos & don’ts. Instead, recalculate. (Love that commercial!) In Matthew 22:34-40, Jesus replied to the lawyer, all the laws depend on just two commandments, to love God with all your heart and love your neighbor as yourself. If we get those two paths straight, our whole legal system is unnecessary. We must renew our minds and fill up with God’s love to wash out deception. Immerse ourselves in the word, which gives hope… hope for a lifestyle free of negative consequences. That does not mean we will not have drama and temptation, for we still live in a fallen world. But we will have inner peace! The more we fill ourselves with the love of God, the less we will be interested in the deception of self or the desire to satisfy our carnal nature, and the less we will desire sin.

We cannot be good in and of ourselves. It’s only God’s goodness in us that makes us good. His grace is what rescues us from our own destruction. Meditate on this scripture, 1 John 3:1-5:12, as it showers us with the great love of our Lord. “How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God!” With His love, what more do we need?

1 John 3.1

Scripture References:

https://www.biblegateway.com/versions/English-Standard-Version-ESV-Bible/#booklist

**Generation References:

http://www.esds1.pt/site/images/stories/isacosta/secondary_pages/10%C2%BA_block1/Generations%20Chart.pdf

http://www.theatlantic.com/national/archive/2014/03/here-is-when-each-generation-begins-and-ends-according-to-facts/359589/

http://www.genconnection.com/lmu/5th/List%20of%20generations%20-%20Wikipedia,%20the%20free%20encyclopedia.pdf

http://www.cnn.com/interactive/2011/05/living/infographic.boomer/

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Generation

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**Highlights in color are links for more information.

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Diaries, Journals, Poetry, & Secrets

I love poetry. But unless you’re one of those sweetie-pie buttercups or deep, dark, depressing kinds of people, you’re generally not going to sit and read a novel of poetry in your alone time. On the rare occasions that time comes, I’d rather curl up in my afghan with Louis L’Amour or Max Brand on a snowy night in my rocker by an open fire. Now that’s heaven!

But, occasionally, I’ll pop open something with meter and rhyme. That’s my journal. It’s safe. I only kept a “diary” once as a kid. I began writing poetry notes after my sister found my diary and blabbed to the world how infatuated I was with what’s-his-name. Humph. (Oh yes, everyone has one of those relatives.) With poetry, one can write deep, dark secrets in code… poetry code. Not many “get it.” But to those who do… one can hop into a whole ‘nother world. So, I thought I’d go out on a limb in this post and give you a smidgeon…

Like the leaves that grow
on a tree in spring,
words from a poet,
joy to our hearts bring.

When winter is past,
silent words inside,
come out in full bloom,
sing poetry’s pride.

My mother typically complained that no one ever did anything for her. I have pictures from the early 1990s showing lots of people gathered in the Shaffer’s neighborhood clubhouse, decorated with balloons, candles, streamers, and 50 candles on the cake (all at my expense). However, the only thing you will hear from her is how everyone forgot her half-century birthday. **Sigh**

I remember one Mother’s Day back in the same time frame, I was asked to take part in the proverbial church program. I don’t recall the name of the song the director picked for my solo, but it was about a mother’s love, and I was surrounded by the kids on the platform. My vocal cords were in full swing that morning, which is strange since most mornings I’m lucky to get out a gurgle. Along with that song, I wrote and recited this poem expressing my vision of motherhood:

A Mother’s Legacy

A visit long ago,
memories deep in my mind.
Peach cobbler, apple pie,
made with hands old and kind.

Asleep in her bosom,
Grandma would slowly rock,
humming, “My child love on”
not a thought of the clock.

My mother’s loving care,
for each button to sew,
deep in the night she worked,
that I might steal the show.

So proud of each success,
as if it were her own.
When failure would descend,
she then made her love known.

With children of my own,
this legacy to pass.
Careers, sitters, day care!
Button up! Off to class!

No time for soft moments,
precious time we misuse.
Society’s pressure,
priorities to choose.

Will children call me blessed?
The Lord’s ways have I taught?
Did I take out the time
to instruct as I ought?

Asleep on my bosom,
my grandchild I now rock,
humming, “My child love on”
not a thought of the clock.

The “code”?? Can you feel the security in a grandma’s care? Can you see the love of a mother who is available to help make costumes for her child’s 1st grade school play? Can you feel the frustration of not having the same experience with her own children because of the busyness of modern life? Can you sense the pendulum swing back around as she loves on her own grandchild? Did you catch the codes?

Poetry can be reflections of our realities… more often; poetry is a reflection of our dreams.

On that Mother’s Day… church was overflowing with mothers everywhere…

Except mine… she didn’t show up that Sunday…

 Poetry Journal

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