***
Let me start by saying I take no pleasure in pointing fingers at other people, in “judging.” But, when you make a cowardly, crazy suggestion for how a team should win a soccer game, I am prodded to speak (and maybe sling a few arrows)!
In my rare experience with watching professional soccer on TV, I’m watching the World Cup and seeing at least three American (USA) candidates for PTSD as well as hearing talk that suggests a psychological disorder during gameplay. Two out of three non-black, male commentators look like they suffer from some mental trauma (which has also impacted their physical appearance and behavior); the third looks as if he’s not quite human, from Krypton. And, a particular soccer coach looks perpetually uneasy with himself and the sport.
One guy is shorter than his companions, balding, has a (slight) crush on one of the women on the panel and occasionally makes no sense while blinking somewhat rapidly. The latter reaction could be a side effect of the studio lighting, working late (when Qatar is dark outside) and his crush.
The taller guy almost always has his head tilted down, giving his big eyes that sad-puppy-dog look. He shifts in his seat in an uncomfortable way and speaks in bursts, trying to sound confident and assured but not looking the part. It’s a bit unsettling.
Then you see that one bald coach blinking and frowning consistently… I’ve seen that behavior before. You may call it a nervous tic. I say the guy is distressed! He’s one step from the crazed soldier in that old acid-drooling-alien film, the guy who cries, “Game over, man!”
They are all former soccer players. And, unlike other sporty windbags who comment on games, these guys are not arrogant and/or aloof. It’s like watching soldiers try to hold a casual conversation after a “tour of duty.”
It’s PTSD. Their history with soccer has turned them into psychological messes, and, I guess, commentating is their therapy group. One is lucky he still has most of his hair; maybe he has a yeti in his family tree.
The way they talk about how to spend ninety minutes and scoring goals…it’s cowardly! It’s insane. You are suggesting a team wastes eighty-five minutes, deflecting their opponents, before trying for one vital goal? Are you out of your minds? Of course, you are. You are traumatized.
Are you suggesting the team cannot score more than one goal without exausting their energy? Are you saying they are lucky to get one goal…while other teams are capable of scoring as many as seven in one game? Even if the odds are against them, why wouldn’t you encourage them to try harder, to go for as many goals as they can?
Maybe saying less and letting the games unfold would be better; let the team be as big or small on the field as they can be. You might be pleasantly surprised. But, that might take away your stage. What do you do then? Yeah…I think there’s anxiety in that question.
So, what is it that causes this? Why are these guys losing their hair and stressing out? I could toss up a few possibilities. But, I’d rather hear from someone who’s been there. I’m just stating my observations and don’t want to make too many assumptions.
Blame the sport, maybe. It’s understandable. The rules are more obnoxious than American football. There’s overtime but no ensured chance to score and clarify a winner. There is more time wasted on questioning penalties, but the potential for referees to unfairly favor one team over another is about the same. Sometimes, I’m not sure if players are getting away with something or not seizing opportunities. The game seems long but goes by quickly; either way, players seem driven mad by time management. It’s like taking the SAT in high school; you have limited time, but, when you start, you’re not quite sure how much time is passing as you stress over the task at hand. It’s a career that can quickly leave you injured both physically and mentally, not unlike a military role. You’ve got older guys in suit jackets–not team hoodies or windbreakers–standing on the sidelines with their arms crossed, flashing gold watches and expecting you to deliver for their benefit. Achievement, action with a sense of purpose, is diminished by the incessant passing of the ball, not knowing if you can count on your own teammates to (help) score. If a game ends in a draw, you’re left with a horrible empty feeling, despite what some might say to pass the time. Talk about excessive distress. [‘No wonder some players bleach their hair. :P]
[There is also the slim possibility these men feel uncomfortable in a foreign land. The conditions (environmental, political, gender-related, etc.) could be impacting their behavior. Perhaps, a past incident, involving clashing with a foreign culture, has scarred them, made them wary.]
Writingbolt's Creation 
Women’s World Cup 2023; Don’t Call Them Set Pieces!!
Tags: 2023, annoying, commentator, editorial, football, futbol, opinion, rant, set pieces, soccer, women, women's world cup, world cup
****
I’m watching the women’s (FIFA) World Cup, and I am hearing at least one commentator abuse a particular term. Set pieces. I wasn’t sure what it meant until someone explained it. But, once I knew the meaning, I knew it was a sickness, as well. I think it’s the same guy, Lalas, who keeps saying it, like a broken record. [Just like the German “veteran” keeps promoting “synchronicity.”]
You cannot call a play a set piece when a player spontaneously jumps into play after the initial motion sends the ball in a clearly unexpected direction! The set piece may be where players are initially placed on the field and/or a particular series of passes, if any of these teams would be that coordinated (but they are not). [Instead, I see more players passing the ball all the way back to the goalie, who just sends it right back to the player who gave the ball to them.] But, once that ball is attacked by a player seemingly outside whatever box is in focus, it’s no longer “set.”
And, a set piece is not any play that results in a goal. I know, when I play Rocket League, I have a tendency to abuse the word “calculated,” which should be used when a ball bounces strategically off one or more walls before entering the goal. But, not every move I make is a damn set piece. Heck, I don’t even want to use that term, once.
Stop the abuse and shut your yap when you feel the impulse.
Rant over. Game on.