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Who is responsible for picking some of the horrible names carried by race horses?
I tell ya…
If I was a horse, I’d feel like quite the tool if someone named me something like Empty Tomb or Commandeer. Why don’t you just call him Barren Balls or Whipped Fool?
I’m watching a race featuring a horse called Life Is Good. And, the show keeps advertising the widespread lack of concern for human safety; only a handful of cautious souls wear masks. The rest are very vain, wealth-minded people who think this is still summer in 2018, and all is well. As if! Thanks for letting the rest of the world know you are responsible for spreading the deathly variants, you fools who name your horses like computer passwords.
And, Life Is Good won. Good luck enjoying the rest of that life, horse. I’m sure it’s all planned out for you. Though, listening to your owner, I hardly understand what he’s trying to say. I’ve noticed that about people connected to horses; they don’t make much sense; as if they’re speaking a foreign language. It’s infuriating.
I’m playing Pokemon Shield, presently (after taking a break from Pokemon Moon); and I spend WAY too much time thinking up good names for all the various creatures, especially Ponyta/Rapidash. And, now that there are two varieties, the fire type and the fairy/psychic type, it’s doubly challenging to pick good names.
Well, the easiest way for me to name a horse is to think of My Little Pony. That toy/cartoon collection has a number of decent horse names. Applejack, Windy, Moondancer, Minty, Rarity…all good names. Well, better names than Empty Tomb; that’s for sure.
Can you imagine the party after a race won by Empty Tomb? Who attends that? Dentists and morticians? Wealthy thieves who raided the coffers of some rich fool?
Oh, stand a little closer, you vain extroverts who show no concern for public safety, even if you can vouch for being vaccinated, for what that’s worth. Pop some more champagne and wear your lame, tool-fitted white baseball caps. Get some more intimate interviews; talk closer to the microphone; would you? Oh, what a wonderful, safe, fun time we are all having in January. [Just sickening…literally.]
If I am lucky to ever have a horse capable of racing, someday (grant me that hoop dream), I think I will name it Virus and see just how popular he/she becomes. Yeah, that sounds smart of me. I’m sure he/she will be a real winner. And, I’ll be sure to wear my diamond watch and cufflinks to the affair, attended by the hundreds of underlings in my company, who will be so busy capturing everything for their personal/business social media. What a highlight in this life that will be.
It all really makes loving horses so much more difficult. Don’t you think? The prized missiles of the wealthy and hasty instead of a natural wonder we could all learn to appreciate in the wild, doomed to have a shortened life by humans who treat them like sports cars they tire of only a few years later.
Writingbolt's Creation 
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