Posts Tagged ‘movie

22
May
25

Milking the Movies; Sequels That Should Just Die

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Coming soon to theaters…

Jurassic Park 17, featuring…who have we got lined up for this one? I dunno. I forget. We’ve done so many. What’s the plot, this time? I don’t know that, either. It’s scary and thrilling, as always. It’s dinosaurs on the loose! They’re savage and they came from a lab where humans keep making the same mistakes with genetics! It’s science!
Now, get out there and sell it every way you can. Get P and G on it. Every movie must be sponsored by Tide detergent, now.

PUKE CITY!

When a movie franchise is reduced to just casting some new face that hasn’t been in one…maybe because now every celebrity wants part of the action/thriller genre…it’s just asking people to stay home and give up on movies.

Honestly, Scarlett J. What is so special about your new movie? The dinosaur one. Yeah. That. No, the first one you did. Wait, you’re booked for more than one? Oy.

[Unlike the image I’ve attached to this post… I wouldn’t mind working on a Dick Tracy (1990) sequel.]

26
Feb
25

Old Cartoons and Their Modern Movie Equivalents Are Unfair.

Looking back at some old cartoons and the modern movies that have tried to embody them, I feel horribly discouraged by the whole business.

Some of the best old cartoons were the three made by the same people to encompass land, air and sea, Thundercats, Silverhawks and Tigersharks. They were not much for plot and didn’t have the best animation/art quality (though it was better than almost every cartoon that came before the 1980s) but had amazing arrays of characters. Even some of the bad guys were valuable assets. Others were just obnoxious and often cackled too much. [Imagine a script in which your lines are ninety percent laughing like a madman.] But, while the three shows had more than thirty characters, each, they only had ten or fewer voice talents for the entire series! Ten voices for an entire series, playing every part. I’m pretty sure each series had only one or two women playing every female role, which is why Bluegrass has to face off against Melodia in Silverhawks instead of Steelheart, because…yep. She’d be facing herself and probably losing her mind in the sound booth.

Now, compare this with cartoons made by Hanna-Barbera, and you’ll see a stark difference. Some HB series, which may have only lasted a season, had FORTY voice credits. FORTY! That’s insane, even if they were only in one episode, each. Maybe they were cameo villains…but they appear in every episode’s credit list. And, still, that’s forty voices for a cheaply drawn cartoon, compared to Silverhawks, Thundercats and/or Tigersharks, which had wide arrays of characters played by a fraction of that many voice talents.

Unfair.

Now, you see movies being made that are supposed to be tributes or representations of those old cartoons. And, what do you get? Plots that are not same and characters that get warped. Rewriting cartoon history…madness. It’s like some legal battle that’s never going to be won by justice.

It’s enough to make you give up looking at any form of entertainment.

Next stop, mindless slavery to the machine.

No?

Then rebel with me. Please.

Let’s set these new-fangled movies straight and give those old cartoons the proper respect and representation.

08
Jan
25

The Demi-Moore Moment and Other Golden Globes

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I stuck to my word. I refused to watch another awards show…and only caught bits of this most recent one. I didn’t exactly cave, but it snagged me as I passed through a room with that channel on the TV. I was more interested in the antics of the hostess, Nikki Glaser, than the awards themselves, which I knew would annoy me inexplicably. [From what I saw of her jokes, she was on fire. I didn’t feel the uncomfortable tension I’ve felt from other (male) hosts.]

Among the biggest buzz about this latest Golden Globes is Demi Moore getting her very first acting award? It seems impossible until you hear how someone refers to her as a “popcorn actress,” which I am roughly translating as someone who might fill a theater but won’t be respected as a high-class star. Often blockbusters like Star Wars and superhero films get seasonal attention but don’t get nominated for much other than musical score and/or sound. [And, popcorn sales go up during the (summer) weeks those movies run in theaters.] Or, rather, that was the way, but changes seem to be happening.

I had to know what earned her this award.

[I’ve seen a number of Demi’s films and wouldn’t call most of them “popcorn” films. Her early films of the 1980s had a certain share-popcorn-with-your-friends-while-you-relate-to-this vibe but were equally unsettling, emotion-evoking, in a way. None of her films seem easy on the stomach, not even Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle (which may be the only film I’d consider a “popcorn film”). Ghost is probably the most potent. I personally don’t crave popcorn when a woman like her is being sexy, fierce or emotionally wounded. I’ll take a drink, though; I get dehydrated when visuals make me shudder or tremble. Can I call her a soda actress?]

movie-theater_reddecor1

And, upon seeing a sampling, I feel this and a number of other awards given to women of a certain age bracket are pity awards, like pardons given to criminals who have been detained too long. [The Substance looks and sounds like a shock-intended statement piece, a sort of art film (which I never heard about until this awards show). So what does that tell you?]

I think some of the tears in Demi’s eyes were a sort of embarrassment, of humiliation, for having to wait so long. Sure, there was gratitude, too, like a starving artist selling a rare painting. But, she looked sort of sad…yet stunning in that golden, molded dress. [The earrings were lame, but the dress was glorious.]

And, that’s the real Globe for Demi, her dress…and a second–perhaps more vital–Globe for her speech about identifying your own self-worth instead of letting some company or organization or the press or your agent evaluate you. You don’t have to be an egotistical snob and demand more of people trying to assist you, but you can hold your head up and evaluate yourself rather than let others decide your fate. [If only that speech would have come after a more significant role; but, when you’ve waited this long just to give a speech, what can you expect?]

I will take that golden Demi moment with me as far as I can carry (or recall) it. It turns the page on that one past award show in which an award-starved Sally Field cried out, “You like me. You really like me.”  [I thought Susan Lucci was the one who said that until I looked it up.  Susan has been another award-starved actress.]

[Demi’s acceptance speech reminded me of my own life and how many times I’ve had to watch others get notice and awards while I got nothing except, maybe, a can of nuts or crappy candy. It also reminds me of when I was pursuing art school and had an admissions guy essentially dismiss my life’s work, my portfolio, before praising his own depressing painting on an office wall, before he took me and my parents on a tour of a very lewd and horrifying artworks made by students. I threw away my portfolio, in anger, and swore I’d change, somehow, to find a better well of talent within myself. That experience changed my outlook on a career in art, yet I am still an artist looking for my proper place in this world. So, though it wounded me (and made me wary of compliments), it didn’t end me.]

Maybe the lesson is that the real stars, the actors, actresses and production crew that deserve the honors don’t often get the trophies because the trophies come with shady behind-the-scenes deals for other projects. By not getting an award, perhaps Demi was spared this freight train of deceit and allowed to pick roles that suited her. I’d say she is a rare face that wasn’t exactly type-cast; wouldn’t you?

[If I was Demi, I’d go to the next award show in sweatpants and a T-shirt. Just be casual and cool, forget the fortune you are pressured to wear (and risk) and ignore the awards until she gets summoned or is asked to speak on someone’s behalf. It’s unfortunate some people have to be “dolled up” and dragged to so many of these events just to watch others get so much attention and trophies; it’s torture for those who don’t win and don’t just come to enjoy the company/atmosphere. It’s hard to enjoy the latter when there is so much focus on the former.]

27
Nov
24

Representation Overkill Causes Nausea

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News at 11!

Or, whatever.

I’ve had enough! I am quite sick of everyone on TV (and I’m sure other forms of media) having to represent something while putting their face or voice “out there.”

You may be “black” or “Muslim” or have some missing body part that makes you special. Maybe you’re gay and recently decided to advertise this discovery, as if you found King Tut’s tomb. Whatever the case may be, you cannot just do anything caught on camera without representing SOMETHING. Some cause needs to rally around your actions to sponsor or, at least, pressure to sponsor you. Every face spotted in a public place or televised program must MATTER somehow.

Are we all NASCAR racecars in need of multiple decals applied to our appearances? Isn’t spotlighting someone for being black or handicapped as bad as mistreating them for the same reason? I’d say so.

Oh, Mr. Writingbolt. You have a big head. What does this thing you are doing mean to all the other big heads in the world? How does it feel to be a big-headed person in this event? [Why don’t you just take a picture and plaster my big head on your billboard while you’re at it, you thoughtless jerks. Better yet; start a charity for big-headed people and ask me to be the spokesperson, so I can annoy people with incessant ads while they’re trying to unwind from their day.]

If you don’t represent, you don’t matter…UNLESS you are the poster boy or girl for some branch of the Disney Empire…then you’re straight. You’re okay. You can skip the representation line. In fact, it’s best if you don’t represent anything and can be molded into whatever role they’re willing to give you. If Disney says you’re going to be a penguin, you be the best damn penguin you can be and remain the same for eighty years. Okay? And, don’t you dare be caught on camera as anything or anyone else.

[Some would say the opposite of the above is true, regarding Disney. You might say they are all about representing something bigger than an individual’s effort/achievement. And, I wouldn’t say you are wrong. But, there is a strange sort of “molding” in the world of Disney that is racist, sexist and/or pressurized. If you are approved by Disney to be part of their world, just about anything you do will be heralded and applauded. You cannot lose if Disney approves you. And, the more ground and resources Disney acquires, the more they can approve and manipulate. Once you lose or abandon that approval, you go into witness protection (so to speak); you disappear and, probably, keep your mouth shut if you don’t want trouble.]

My stomach cannot remain calm. I’ve seen far too many bleached teeth, BOTOX’d faces and staged dramatic scenes befitting some show bent on pairing people together while too often failing to do just that.

—–

Spontaneous detour…

Meanwhile, I see someone, who’s generally pretty, flashing a shine on their cheeks and/or their forehead…maybe a little cleavage, too. And, I want to scream. I know how I don’t like to look at myself in the mirror, anymore. But, if I have to resort to THAT, to treating my face like a clay pot with cracks in it, any confidence I claim to take from it will never be genuine. It’s fraud that’s so apparent, you don’t have to “represent” it.

If I looked like that, I’d be cracking on the inside, anyway. My calm would be as fragile as tissue paper (as if it’s not already). I might as well slather myself in mayo…because, you know, every “helpful” cream out there has to be as white as bird poop. Am I hiding something? Am I repairing myself? No; what gave you that idea? What? You can SEE the stuff on my skin? The size of my head doesn’t suit the rest of my body after taking weight-management drugs? You mean I don’t look fit and trim when I’m obviously uncomfortable in my own natural body?

How do you address someone who is obviously paranoid about every little line on their face (yet unable to do anything about moles)? How do you convince them that they don’t have to look plastic to be accepted for who they are? It’s not any easier with so many ads for toothpaste and the same dentist/dental assistant ready to put you in the spotlight for being “less than white.”

This sort of vain behavior is the collateral damage, the side effect, the aftershock of excess representation (and soooo many accolades, so many trophies).

You can treat your body like a plastic toy. But, soon enough, you’ll sacrifice your mind and soul, too, just to forget what you did to yourself out of vanity overload.

Now, I’m not saying you cannot “have work done” if it genuinely helps you feel better on a daily basis. If it helps you look in the mirror with comfort, have at it. If it allows your clothes to rest comfortably against your skin without an annoying burning or itchy feeling, that’s good. If you can remove a bothersome mole or outbreak of spots that make you look like you’ve been hit with a plague, I approve.

On the other hand, if you think you can plaster wrinkles the rest of your life, you’re crazy. There comes a point when the human body simply unrolls something in response to your chosen lifestyle. And then there is aging. We all have to age someday…as far as I know.

But, DO NOT attempt repairs if you must be on camera “the next day.” You might as well have your clothes on the floor. I suspect this is why some actors and actresses must learn to put up with things like crowded teeth; the alternative would be more detrimental to their career, especially if they “have to always be on.”

If this “work” leaves you looking like an art project gone wrong…I’ve got nothing positive to say. It’s tragic (what you did). I’m pretty sure the right people–as I’m often told–would accept you, wrinkles, spots and all.

[I haven’t exactly found those people, yet. So, I could be wrong. But, I’m still bothered by the excessive and obvious evidence of vain reconstruction.]

I know a few celebrities who actually look good with wrinkles and gray hair; they aged well. And, even if they don’t, how can we be heartless and treat them as anything other than human (like ourselves)? I don’t necessarily approve of everyone who “embraces the gray” and changes everything to be “platinum,” including their wardrobe. But, some “grayheads” look good. The others simply don’t need me or anyone to evaluate them.

—–

Back to the matter of excessive and canned representation…

If I hear one more person ask, “What does (what you recently did on camera) mean to you (as a representative of ___)?

It means everything to you. The experience is amazing and unbelievable. You are so fortunate. [And, you recite this more than once, whenever you are hit with the same tired, abused questions, as if you have to sell the show, so others will submit to its deception and feed the monster.]

…I don’t even want to say it. But, I’m ill.

—–

I’m going to pause, again, to give a response from my own gut. I don’t care what televised thing I am doing. Even if it actually alters my lifestyle, my personal world and space, in some way that makes me feel life just got better, it does NOT “mean everything to me,” no matter how dazzling it may seem. I could win the billion-dollar lottery and still find myself facing the same daily struggles when the money runs out (if I don’t invest wisely).

I don’t think anything should hold the value of “everything” because that would make it lethal. Your life means everything to you…or you die. A few weeks with a televised contest of a very staged fashion should not impact whether you live or die. Those trite expressions really annoy me. They are a loss of your common sense, submitting to emotional overload. Some would call this dramatizing, the equivalent of throwing a fit about this being “the worst day ever.”

Are we honestly supposed to believe every person who recites the above lines is being genuine? Everyone of them has had the “everything” experience from being part of this show? I highly doubt that. So, why say it?

If anyone is saying something just to respond to a microphone in their face, to appease the snoop, I’m going to get agitated. If it was a great experience for you, say so, but don’t exaggerate to the extent that you make it sound like everyone should do what you did. Odds are they won’t get the chance; so don’t deceive or tease them. Just speak for yourself (and say you had a good time).

And, if you want me to say the above lines, I will not respect you. If you threaten me to say those lines, I will probably comply and then avoid you like the plague for the rest of my days, regretting the trap I entered. I will speak unkindly (to say the least) of you whenever possible. I will NOT be coming back to watch others play your game. And, I will not tell others to play along.

—–

How is anyone supposed to feel “normal” or comfortable with anything they do if it has to be put in the form of a term-paper Q-and-A?

What makes matters even worse (on top of nauseating) is when what someone “represents” is tainted with falsehood, when something like charity is just a wholesome cover for something questionable. Imagine someone who is being promoted as the poster man or woman for a new movie while secretly participating in sexual assault or financial fraud. Imagine a charity that’s just an excuse for a tax write-off (evasion) or cover for a measly paycheck on some game show. And, we never know until someone decides to take that person to court; that seems to be the status quo for exposing a lie.

When the truth comes out…if it ever truly comes out…there’s often no coming back from it. They’re marked. [Yet, some famous faces have a remarkable way of redeeming themselves in whatever way they can. Some buy their way out of legal action. I don’t necessarily accept that redemption. But, others seem to give it a stamp of approval.]

When do we get out of the classroom, out of the spotlight or off the podium? When does a “celebrity” get to just be the person they were named instead of the face of something on a poster? No wonder we can’t be okay with a little weight gain or flawed skin. Every time we see someone “famous,” they have to be…perfectly okay with everything. If they’re having a bad day or craving something that’s not family-channel approved, there must be something wrong with them; they need “help.” [And, that isn’t the sort of help you get from spending a relaxing day with a good friend.]

Of course, we need to have more ads for psychological help, for all those harmed by the sheer overload of representation, I bet. It’s damage control for a bad habit that’s being promoted like smoking (or, more recently, “vaping”); we are told it’s bad but some people still feel the need to sell you something that contributes to the problem. It’s like sitting at an award ceremony and going home with nothing but the memory of being caught on camera with no accolades to advertise.

So, what are YOU doing here at this award ceremony, where so many are being spotlighted for their recent projects? Nothing? Well, at least, you and your plus one are…uh…looking good. Who are you wearing? Okay. We don’t care. See you on the best dressed reel, tomorrow, and in the next issue of People magazine. Do you have a quote we can use?

It’s bad enough “celebrities” have to be canned the way they are when “promoting” their latest film, podcast or whatever. It’s like a never-ending job interview. You can’t say anything negative about anything, even if it just popped in your head while being asked about the director or a co-star you cannot stand. What was it like? It was…AMAZING. It’s all good. Right?…as you choke on the vomit in your throat. Pitch that resume. Get the next job offer. Everyone wants you because you don’t complain. You’re flawless. [As if.]

Now, if the above turns me off, it turns off my TV. And, if other people turn off the TV or ignore the magazines, all that time and effort applied to painting celebrities as polished and perfectly happy is wasted. No one’s even looking when someone is jabbing a microphone in a famous face and, obviously, making them feel pressured and uncomfortable with the “routine.”

I may not be a fan of some people, but I’ll be less of a fan of more people if they continue to be displayed this canned, artificial way. Even my favorite faces darken my heart whenever I see them “masking” something. I don’t like telling lies, and I don’t like seeing others do it. I’m not the best judge of liars, but, eventually, I know and retaliate.

If celebrities are prone to seeking psychological help, using recreational (and illegal) drugs and facing plastic surgery, what do they think their “fans” are doing? Isn’t it apparent? If someone is in the spotlight, silently saying “this is okay” (what they are doing), witnesses will emulate. And, if the witnesses cannot afford what the celebrities are doing, they will bankrupt themselves in more ways than just financial.

Talk about being bad examples. Forget whatever you think you’re representing for a job that lasts less than a year. Think about your impact on the lives watching you. Of course, when your luxurious financial well-being/ego depends upon that job, you might slight (all of) your spectators. Having to be more selective about the food and/or clothing you buy or what parties you may have to skip is too much to bear (for you).

[If all of this “pressure” is deemed necessary to get a film into theaters (especially a film that betrays its source material by changing the story, as so many films do for whatever reason), I’d say the whole thing is a waste of resources and people. A big budget disaster and lie is what I’d call this. Instead of sticking one cigarette into one person’s mouth, you’re making the whole sky toxic by crowding countless mouths with rolls of excuse paper. Add on the magazine features, DVD extras and merchandise…and I’d be inclined to consider something dark and disturbing I’d rather not mention.]

Can’t everyone just be somewhere, participating without representing? If you’re a guest on a talk show, sure; you’ll want to have something to discuss. But, honestly, for anyone who’s just happy to see someone they like, can’t fans simply enjoy that?…versus pressing the same old questions about what’s coming to theaters or (Cable) TV? See. Then it would actually be good to see someone, again, versus catering to a “plug.”

You know what would really make a celebrity shine in my eyes? Seeing them completely comfortable in their own natural skin, warts and all. [Of course, few or no warts would be better because even I have been conditioned to be that vain.] They don’t have to be the most shiny Muslim or black person (who isn’t exactly black because their parents are “mixed”) or participant in any celebrity showcase. They don’t have to be wearing designer clothes I’ll never afford nor wear. They don’t have to have their ribs showing, bleach their naturally brown skin or dark hair or fit into a size-0 dress. They certainly don’t have to flash cleavage (especially if it’s not there). They don’t have to invite thieves and trolls to assault them (with how they present themselves).

Crack a joke. Tell an embarrassing story, once in your life. Blush a little when you make a mistake. You’re human. Represent that.

But, he or she can’t just be comfortable with their self. They also have to exhibit a compatible personality (for me to like or ever love them). And, if they don’t have that compatible personality? Then I don’t have to be a fan…and that’s okay! Everyone doesn’t have to be the fan of everyone else. Just don’t add to the hate by pretending to be something you’re not or letting anyone spotlight you for something you did not come to do.

[In the case of a certain dancing competition, you didn’t sign on to tote a sign for “black lives matter.” You came to prove you could dance and, maybe, win a trophy. So, if someone asks you how it feels to be the first black woman (if that’s even true) in the finale (and ensuing tour), you don’t give them a single word of compliance. You tell them this isn’t about being black. This is about you. And, as selfish as it may seem, it will be respected. Maybe you’re not toting the weight of every racial issue popping up in the world, but you’re helping yourself with art therapy. Represent that. It’s more important for all of us to heal ourselves and appreciate the arts than think about how being famous and black makes you the spokeswoman for an entire race of people. And, shame on all who press these routine questions on camera; you are tools, slaves of the media. What do we know about slavery? Exactly.]

Go away, you who are phony, canned, visibly waxed, bleached….artificial. And, if you are being forced to represent something for a cause rather than being welcomed for who you are as a person, I don’t want to see you. Forced representation sucks. It’s a bad perfume ad. We don’t need perfume or makeup to cover what we are. We need to know who and what we are and accept that.

Period.

Mic dropped.

I accept that I may be more wordy than others; it’s a side effect of the pressures I’ve been forced to endure. Being more wordy has helped me be more creative expressing myself. It helps with creative writing and solving word puzzles, too. I used to be a quiet kid who did as he was told, trusted and respected most adults (even some who were not family and probably should not have been trusted) and kept himself busy (so he wouldn’t anger his unhappy, quarreling, fussy parents). Then someone, who I trusted to help me steer away from suicide, threatened my life with what they were paid to distribute. And, that turned me into what I am today. I don’t need to represent other wordy people as some sort of cause for mental health or promoting a movie. I’m just me, one of the more wordy people in this world. If you don’t like me, find someone else to read.

08
Aug
24

It’s Another Oz Movie

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It’s another extension of the Wizard-of-Oz franchise! And, I cannot wait to see it! I’m buying advance tickets at the most expensive price I can find because I must be first to support diversity! Just look at the diverse cast in this latest Oz movie! It’s amazing to be working with all of those famous people! Well, I didn’t actually work with them, but I feel so close to them all, just watching their film…because of all the diversity! You’ve never seen such a diverse cast! It’s amazing!

And, I feel just a little nauseous trying to be that enthusiastic about a highly tuned remake of something I already appreciated in a live-action theater, as a musical, without the modernized diversity. Oh, I’m not saying there’s something wrong with diversity…but, too often, it feels forced. And, this is one of those times. I don’t need to rewatch the story with a new cast to support a movement. Nor do I have any confidence that the diverse cast will make the story better than how I last experienced it.

Just like telling yourself you need to eat a salad because it’s healthy for you (when you have no interest in the salad and have not given it any satisfying flavor with the right dressing), this diversity-injected remake isn’t appealing to me…maybe because it comes with a sort of subliminal label. Had this been an original story with a diverse cast, I’d be more intrigued…maybe.

[I’ve seen some “teen lit” films with diverse casts that also scream “diversity movement,” and the “health food” factor, the “token” casting, turns me off. The original West Side Story (movie) had stimulating diversity, and then someone said, “Hey. This isn’t diverse enough. It needs more.” And, I humbly disagreed, but the upgrade to artistic quality was satisfying.]

So…this is awkward. I’m just gonna hop a hot-air balloon out of here, now.

14
Mar
24

Forget the AWARDS, Award Shows.

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After watching, with some reservations and, later, indigestion, the latest Oscars (award show), I have adjusted my POV on award shows, in general.

I know. I’ve said this how many times now. I tell myself “no” and still cave with that foolish whim, that hope, of seeing something or someone who becomes the focus of tomorrow’s “watercooler” gossip…or just seeing someone I personally like (or adore) get a chance to speak from the heart (not a teleprompter).

[On that note, when I saw Emma Stone crumble during her acceptance speech, a speech in which she spoke of children and her relationship, a speech I kinda hoped she’d interrupt to share her award with the Native-American woman people were making such a fuss about (if she deserved that respect and not just for being Native-American), I wanted to run up there and support her, massage her upper arms to warm her up a little. That’s the kind of man I am; that’s the sort of partner I’d want to be. I suppose that’s not allowed or proper in the eyes of the media/majority. I’m sure Security would have had none of that. But, Emma needed someone to steady her (and maybe fetch some lemon water for her throat).]

I noticed some effort into making commercials that are “cinematic,” ads which reflect movie-making in some way. It reminded me of why so many flock to the American Super Bowl; it’s no longer about the game. It’s about the ads. Well, if we are so destined to wash out all of the purpose for a program, why bother with the program, at all? Heck. Skip the Super Bowl; just give us the ads! A two-hour showcase of the best advertising money can buy! Right?

And, as for those award shows…ugh! So much “pomp and circumstance;” so much tuxedoes-for-men and excessive dressing for women, even when the dressing cannot adequately cover the woman in a respectful and/or tasteful manner. So much time wasted on cutting people off as they receive awards chosen by some secret society like the Illuminati. So many poorly chosen, highly bleached and waxed public speakers who must politely engage others being rewarded not so much for their individuality and talent but because they are of a particular nationality or sexual preference. And, all who are able to view this via TV begin to act like this is just one more thing to place in a betting pool; grab a score card and place your bets, fools.

Insanity.

[Oh, and it’s recommended, if you’re a woman, to get pregnant to give people something to discuss; it’s also a good cover for any awkward conversation. You can just excuse yourself because something is happening inside your body; or you can talk about the dress maker who accommodated your enormous pouch.]

Personally, I enjoy some, not all, of the “antics” that happen during the award shows. The rest feel so staged they make me ill. And, I’d say every show eventually irks me with some decision made. It’s inevitable. So, for me to watch another would be like agreeing to ingest poison just to be given an oxygen tank, so that I can keep breathing.

If we are being drawn in to enjoy the antics (and advertising), just make a show with all of that. Don’t waste time cutting people off to squeeze in every award and whatever monologue you feel the need to give about the orchestra, the judges and the secret society you never quite expose. You think airing the show an hour earlier makes a difference; it did not. Just take us viewers to the after parties and have everyone who got something give their speeches comfortably and with as much time as they feel is necessary. Let’s be better listeners and set the judging aside. Isn’t that what all the fuss about acceptance and awareness is for, anyway? Or, is all that racial and gender buzz just a mask you wear at your elitist party?…a show to raise charity money you then apply to tax evasion?

Nooo. Just sing your Ken song to promote sales. It has nothing to do with being accepted as a one-of-a-kind individual not tied to any agenda or dominating force. But, no Ken song can compete with a real bomb. You can ponder that while you worry about what you were made for and then take your after-party drug trip just to face the after-its-over period between jobs. Everyone in showbiz must be Robert Downey, Jr.; not just Robert Downey, Jr. The others just do a better job of hiding their failings and addictions.

If I become bitter against any “faction” of humanity, it is unlikely because I am gay-phobic or anti-Jew (because I am neither). It is more likely because someone in these factions is acting like a bull in a China shop or a Nazi leader, trying to start a stampede which will ultimately brush “ordinary” folks like me aside. It is because people judged me as gay for being an atypical boy (and because some gay men think I am and wish I was one of them). I will not be dismissed or ignored because I am not “woke,” rich by birth or part of some global movement for acceptance and awareness which could just as well be a cloak for something sinister. [When everyone currently “special” is in demand, people like me won’t even have a chance to get their foot in the door unless I sell my soul to the industry.]

I’m not so obtuse that I can’t read between the lines and see when people are being used as tools to “represent” instead of being respected for who they are as individuals.

[Hey! You’re both black and Hawaiian! Would you represent both and do every thing we tell you, to the letter, if we give you a microphone?! That’d be greeeeat. Did anyone else notice the Native-American “best actress” or any of the African-American male actors looking just a little uncomfortable when they were being spotlighted? How certain little presentations seemed formulated with generic words of respect and/or honor, rather than personal remarks from people who actually valued the people they were honoring?]

If we cater to the mindset of putting one TYPE ahead of another, no matter the type, we’re no better off than when “white supremacy” was normal and not hated or when women were nothing more than “housewives” too dumb to learn how a machine works.

And, I know “political humor” is all the rage because everyone who thinks they are funny cannot stop speaking ill of one leader and/or another. But, does it have to be a part of EVERY televised program? EVERY celebrity event? Haven’t ANY of you been bullied or verbally harassed in your lives? You have? Then why think you are above or just the victim of all of that…because you’re taunting someone over and over and over again, until you look like a bully. That’s not helping anyone; that’s “making America great, again,” as you like to repeat.

Do you want to help heal the world or just change the color of the hot mess still going around it?

You KNOW you’re just going to alienate or agitate someone (unless you are completely oblivious to your own antics and thus worthy of being labeled jerks on my most hated list); so why do it? Why resort to throwing rotten tomatoes? This is supposed to be a space and place of mutual acceptance, respect and honor. Not your late-night stand-up stage. We know who you are…sort of. We don’t need a reminder.

[Is this one of those Harry-Potter things, where we change the color of the dominating party because some odd wizard decides to hand out special points at the last minute? Well, today, the Native-Americans did something special…I don’t know what. Who decides these things, anyway? So we’re gonna display their flags…and piss on the flags of those who support that guy over there, the one with the bad wig.]

[Here’s something (else) you probably didn’t ponder. A joke was made about Miyazaki’s anime team not being present to accept their award for the film about a boy and a stork. Now, I know the host isn’t that quick with the wit to make such a joke on the fly; you can disagree, but this is how I see the guy. He’s not very fluid or spontaneous; he would not excel at improvisation. The joke had to be written before the show…which would mean that he knew the film would win…wouldn’t it? So, are some–if not all–winners made known to the writers of these events in advance?…including hosts who have to make jokes? Wouldn’t that make the whole opening of envelopes and surprising an audience kind of pointless? If just that one winner was known in advance, there was an award segment that could have been skipped on live television, giving more time to people who wished they had just a little more time and less reason to stress over a speech…considering so much attention is being given, lately, to when the whole show starts, ends and, as always, how long people are free to talk (which they never are…free to speak from their hearts and not under scrutiny for this or that from whoever pays them).]

In short, screw you, award shows; for you continue to be a cruel pea-and-shell game, a three-card-Monty that just ends in stomach upsets and drunken foolishness. All your expense and glamor is wasted, when a disaster film about a global horror gets the top honor for music in a year of artsy films. You sully all that is to be valued in cinema. You taint accomplishment and hard-work. You push your servants to the brink of death. It’s all pre-arranged for some secret purpose. Your televised spectacles are just a cheap illusion to potentially sway a few more merch’ sales. Go play with your elitist selves. I don’t need your poor movie choices to mess with my head nor the warped award and business decisions that follow. I know what deserve four stars, and it isn’t your opinions.

Sorry, Jimmy Kimmel. I had something to say about you, but we ran out of time, again.

[“I’m Just Ken,” rewritten with lyrics about myself, in the process of being posted…]

12
Apr
23

The New Mermaid Has Arrived, and I Need to Rant, Again

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So, the live-action mixed-bag-of-updates otherwise known as the “re-imagined” version of The Little Mermaid has reached its debut. And, it’s stirring up on-going feelings of resentment. I am very aware of the on-going need for more ethnic diversity in stories and still fixed on the disappointing creativity and acceptance of authors who could craft, publish and produce those desired stories. Instead of writing new film scripts for new movies that feature all of the wonderful diverse people you may find in this world–and casting people fit for those roles (not casting someone from a different ethnicity or culture to play the part of someone from an entirely different nation/race/culture)–someone is twisting stories that have already found their way into hearts to suit a different audience. It’s an utter lack of respect to someone’s previous work and to the characters included in those works, not to mention all of the actors, both voice and visual, who previously played those parts.

Just imagine deciding the Mona Lisa is wrong for whatever damn reason and deciding to paint over it or dump the old one and replace her with a new face, someone more “woke” or PC, as if the Mona Lisa is some crime against nature. Or, what if we decide a song written and sung by an artist like Shakira has become dated and offensive in terms of lyrics; so we get some young, new talent to take a rewritten version and make that famous. Now, the new talent is the big seller, the flash-in-the-pan millionaire being talked up for her latest mansion purchase, and Shakira gets to sit in a dumpster wondering why she even bothered writing that song, if the world was just going to piss on her.

Where does the crime stop? When did respecting one’s creation lose its value? Even if the artist or the creation was deemed evil or vile by a unanimous global vote, what sense does it make to remake that horror under a new face and claim it’s suitable for the new era?

You might stop producing a certain brand name of syrup or oat-laden boxed mix because what was once a socially common choice of words is now impolite. You might keep the product line going because people still enjoy the taste or some other quality; just give it a different name and/or face. Sure. That might work. It might also bother the manufacturers a little; though, considering the age of the origins of that product, I’m sure the ownership has changed hands enough times that the old name doesn’t hold as much value or importance. Again, the name is a dated term which was and is somewhat agitating. I get it. I wouldn’t want to buy Pasty White Guy Syrup or Art Geek Oats, either…unless I was friends with a fellow art geek or pasty white guy who made the product, someone I respected and trusted with food.

But, as desperate as I might ever be to recreate something, I would not stoop so low as to turn a Caucasian mermaid African (or any hyphenated variation) and keep the name and hair color the same just to appeal to a different people. It’s…amateur. It’s no better than a fan making a home movie because they’re such big fans of the story. So, let the fans make their own home movies.

Or, can I ask someone to write a White Lightning script for me?…because I like Black Lightning; I just wish he was a white guy like me, so I could look up to myself in a different body and not just wish but believe I could be that hero. Or, keep it Black Lightning but make him a white guy with blond hair and blue eyes…because I feel slighted as a pale male individual.

You don’t make up for an era of crimes to humanity by remaking beloved and otherwise valuable works just to appeal to a new audience. If anyone tried to rewrite J. D. Salinger’s works, he would surely spring from the grave and set the world on fire like Adolph Hitler. And, I would likely side with his brigade because this remake crap has gone too far.

Get a fricken imagination! Stir those creative juices. Go vacation somewhere that isn’t a gratuitous pleasure cruise paid for by your family’s or corporation’s excessive wealth. Or, if you’re a poor writer being handed the task of rewriting something by a wealthy investor who just wants to see this happen…I know it sounds crazy to turn down a paycheck, you tool, but SAY NO! You’ll die a happier person than those who commit the crimes and spend the foul profits. Or, you can live the lives of the seedy and shady characters you hear about in…well, stories that have gotten old, I imagine; stories your ancestors probably wrote that are currently forgotten or dusty, already, while you look at some colored, over-produced Disney storybook from 200X and think about turning another cash cow into something new, already, when that’s not even considered old material to someone like me, someone who’s lived a little longer than those apparently in charge of…everything.

If this doesn’t get better, I fear every artist on this planet will dry up and die in misery because there will be no respect for the works of the deceased or the living. All creative work will be subject to the insecurity and threat of remake fever. All original thoughts will be at risk of erasure by popular vote.

Now, I was just about to say artists are generally not popular people when they’re alive…because, for the longest time, I’ve been hearing people say countless works are given ridiculously high prices/values after the artist dies. Most notably, Vincent Van Gogh struggled as a poor, lonely artist, a reject of his parents who obsessed about the son they already had and lost; his surviving brother (not the still-born one that the parents couldn’t let go in memory) tried to help him by selling some works and could do nothing to save the artist from going mad with a lousy roommate. And, years later, Van Gogh paintings are sought-after treasures tossed around like limited-edition trading cards or the possessions of the crucified Jesus Christ.

But, there are other artists who rose to high fame and some measure of wealth while they were alive…Norman Rockwell, for one. Now, there was an artist who found a niche, developed respect and a fan base which brought potential models to his doorstep, seeking immortality in one of his paintings.

Are there any artists like him around…now?

I hear crickets. I guess not. The closest I can come to a comparison might be the infamous “Banksy” who avoids public awareness in one way while achieving fame in another.

So, perhaps, with a lack of popular graphic artists and only some literary “talents” occupying the spotlight, the world is rather dry and dead, in terms of creativity.

But, that is still no excuse for what is happening with these recreations.

I’m just one lonely artistic voice in this big, messed up world. And, because I don’t shovel money into this blog space, my voice is even more muted. But, I state this here and now for whoever may happen to find it.

…..

Actually, I’m not even sure what to say because I have no idea or guarantee it will amount to anything or be respected.

How does one such as myself go on living with a sense of value or purpose? While the “popular” “trending” world is trying so hard to kiss the feet of those previously mistreated beyond repair and those not previously permitted into certain “Hollywood” circles, it is pissing all over those creative minds and bodies that came before them, disrespecting ancestors and de-valuing countless previous works just because you who have the power to produce for the public–to put things out there where the world can see them–cannot find an ounce of originality or let some other talent in to publicize their original works in a way that other giants, like Disney, have already done with their time in the sun.

This world is criminal. And, all the “amazing” talk that keeps getting pitched year after year after year by all of the famous faces who cannot look at anyone straight in the eye as they speak…is stomach-turning garbage. Television and movies are corrupting everything created, down to the basic value of the spoken and written languages. Pretty soon, nothing you can say or write will mean a thing…because someone will just as quickly alter your words, your intention and turn your own desires against you, simply because certain people have “sway” you do not possess.

If I am ever guilty of any crime in a court of law, I won’t likely sweat a drop of guilt or concern, anymore, because the atmosphere is already so vile that any crime I could ever commit doesn’t seem to matter. I’m still going to be small potatoes compared to the next person who does something far worse. There won’t be any fame in what I commit unless I blow up the whole planet and wipe out humankind. But, then, no one would be around to evaluate what I did. So, what would be the point? I don’t expect rave reviews from the cockroaches.

Respect the artists and drum up your own damn creativity.

Don’t rewrite history just to please your instant-gratifying impulses and excuse every damn foolish thing you dare to try.

And, if you absolutely must remake something, have the damn decency to leave the previous/original work as it was made. She could be some other mermaid in the same damn sea who didn’t have red hair but shared Triton as her father. But, if Mr. Banks was some woman’s precious father who didn’t have facial hair, don’t change the face that woman valued to fill a casual whim and your pockets with riches while selling her on a song. ‘Just plain wrong.

[Disney, you’re the biggest creative force on the planet, right now, the wealthiest and still growing the monopoly, consuming every archive of talent any other famous creator can no longer sustain, and you couldn’t look or be more pathetic. You’re the biggest pool of talent and also the biggest threat to creativity. You’re a glutton who can’t say no. You could have turned Stan Lee down and told him to hand the reins of Marvel to someone else. Why? Because you didn’t need Marvel. You don’t need the Muppets, Studio Ghibli or any other franchise, either. You don’t deserve the works of those talents because you don’t respect them, at all. You lead people to think you do because your real talent is in painting whimsical, musical advertising that seduces lazy viewers like the ancient sirens. You just take talents like some kids’ toys sold at a rummage sale and play with them as you will. You’re an excessively wealthy investor in prostitution and corrupt plastic surgery. And, because you’re so apparent and wealthy, others will fall in line with your ways, only making matters worse. No one can compete with you; so they bow and hands you their works, rather than waste all of their energy trying to get even a fraction of your spotlight. You are a troublesome trendsetter. A King Midas dealing in fools’ gold, seducing minds young and too old to care anymore. But, I’m a creative mind who still cares; and I think you are dangerous…greedy, careless and foul.]

13
Dec
22

Happy Birthday, Tay Swift; Bonus Wish

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Awe, heck.  I’m such a fountain of creativity, and you’re such a muse, Tay, even though you can get hung up on poo-poo songs about relationships gone wrong.  I scheduled one bundle of creativity.  But, I keep coming up with more.  Here’s a bonus bit.

Happy birthday, beautiful.

steamymoviescene-shared-by-couple-me-and-TaySwift-misty-dark-field_UY-ep41-capture-poster_ap-CSPP-38TS-2R

14
Sep
22

Cinematic Innocence, When and Why Films Fail to Be Realistic

*****

If you love movies without finding flaws, you must be very “simple.” I don’t think soldiers can fully enjoy war/combat movies because they are sure to either laugh or shake their heads at the lack of real details. Similarly, true passion and fury cannot be captured on film because I don’t think the former would agree with most viewers and wouldn’t want to be public. The latter would be too gory and violent to stomach; and the loser would not live to do another scene.

Am I wrong?

If so, confess. Are you experienced in any way and able to name a film that is true to your experience?

As a sort of reference point, I was recently watching the “Expendables” movies and noticing how, despite a respectable attention to emotion/tone (which is rather shocking in such a testosterone-driven frame) and generous weight to militaristic action/violence, the camera shots are so quick and divided that I am at a loss, wondering who exactly is killing who, how well (are they exacting this violence) and for what reason. The heroes are like the Avengers in rags; they don’t even look like the “Joes” of the 1980s, who all wore distinct (though ridiculous, at times) uniforms/costumes. There are also moments when explosions seem to be misplaced and when dialogue lacks…everything.

You could similarly look at films like the James Bond series (and countless copycats) and point out the faulty use of gunfire. How many bullet trails have to miss a running man before they finally graze or slay him?

This is what I propose to do if I am ever fortunate enough to make a film (or, at least, write a screenplay). I am going to avert the camera away from intense scenes (violence and passion), not exactly for maintaining a wide-audience rating but to spare the difficulty of adequately depicting what would really happen in those moments. Instead of a poorly shot/choreographed fight scene or gratuitous sex scene, I will paint silhouettes in action and, if needed, have witnesses react in ways that would confirm the intensity of the veiled action. Even if critics have something to say about the lack of quality (not adequately filming realistic people in realistic action), I think the room for the imagination to fill in gaps will be better than quick, confusing cuts and more obviously “simulated” action.

08
Sep
21

Just a Squirrel Trying to Get His Nut

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Here’s my little comic strip for the day.  Enjoy.

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