***
So, I see an ad for a rare televised concert with the lovely Tay Swift and try my lousy best to remind myself when it airs. [I don’t follow her religiously on cable/pay-per-view/internet TV; so I’m surely missing several previous concerts and wondering why the local TV station felt it was time to broadcast one…maybe just to work a deal with Capital One and fill otherwise dead air time? I am fairly sure this Paris Lover concert aired previously on some other platform.]
I miss the first fifteen minutes while struggling to keep up with a mad movie I should have just skipped (but there really wasn’t anything great to watch, anyway). Then a light went off in my head, while dabbling with something creative, and I ran to see if it was still on. It was…and I felt self-conscious within a matter of minutes. [And, I tell myself, “At least, it’s not a teeny-bopper concert.”] Apparently, it was only an hour long?
My first impression…
I see several cameras taking shots of young women, mostly teenage girls, in the audience. And, everyone seems to be wearing some kind of light-up wristband…which reminds me of a picture I made of/for Tay with light streaming off a bracelet. I don’t exactly see any MEN cheering for or even ogling her. Maybe the guys are afraid of being targeted by the typically oppositional feminine energy. [So, I guess this is just a young meeting of the women’s movement, and I’m the lone thin-haired guy in the audience at The View.]
Also, Tay…looks a bit rough. She’s wearing a hot mess of black fabric and glitter. [Anyone cued up to do as her songs say is probably itching to fire flaming amazon arrows at me, right now, just for saying anything remotely critical.] She looks made up yet like she got caught in the rain and had to tie her clothes in knots to keep them from falling off. [Did I miss the rain delay? Did I forget someone mentioning she performed despite the rain? I thought I had heard something, once, about her performing on a rainy day.] But, it’s okay. I kinda like her this way. Aside from the glittery bits, which are a distraction, she looks raw, natural, down-to-earth, vulnerable…well, as vulnerable as she can until you get a good look at the usual red lips and heavy eye makeup.
[I’ve been looking over and for Tay photos, recently, to expand and improve my “artistic interpretations.” And, I’ve noticed Tay going through so many changes, so many different looks and hairstyles. Even in her Paris concert photos, she exhibits a few different looks, like she colors her hair every day (or wears wigs?). Even her “rival,” Katy Perry doesn’t seem to vary her looks that often; at least, not lately; nor Lady Gaga who, a few years ago, you’d see popping up in some crazy costume nearly every week (it seemed). And, I begin to wonder if she isn’t perpetually in some sort of identity crisis, not quite sure who to be and how to protect herself from the media shit storm, even when it’s not focused on her.
I get this feeling like she’s a delicate yet bold and brave flower tossing in a hurricane, torn between following some trend and being true to herself. Or, she just has the good genes (genes that don’t cause hair to fall out when you color it, for example) and ability to change her appearance like a superheroine or shapeshifter. And, some of the outfits she ends up wearing…they’re like “disaster relief” instead of “superstar glam.” I feel slightly motivated to play fashion coordinator for her…and slightly afraid someone would bite my fingers off just for trying.]
Getting back to the concert and the music…
With all of the commercial breaks–including plenty of Capital One ads–and a few behind-the-scenes bits, I’m not seeing much performance. I think I saw her sing four songs before the show ended. And, two of those were songs I had heard on the radio. But…something wasn’t quite right.
I put the captions (CC) on to see the lyrics (just because I wanted a bit of a karaoke experience and know how folks can poorly hear the real words when they are sung in a swirling sea of music). And, the words I saw on the screen did not match what Tay was singing. At least…they didn’t match what I was hearing. And, apparently, the audience was singing some second part whispered in the background of the track, because Tay sang one line, and the captions displayed another while the cameras cut to the audience (who I couldn’t hear singing anything).
Doing my best to calm down (eh) and not be too loud (me? standing on pins and needles with my index finger precariously pressed to my lips as I watch?), I also noticed, during that particular song, Tay had assistance from dancers who looked less drag-ish than her video counterparts. [And, thank gawd, there wasn’t an appearance by a bothersome poser-painter.] I did enjoy the big-screen graphical assistance and the overall energy of the performance…though the audience getting vocal over Tay’s…dancing was excessive.
[Just in case anyone is bothered and concerned I may be purely critical, here, I want to ensure I was just happy to see Tay perform on TV…I wanted to see her…not to judge her…but hoping every song wasn’t a coded message to some past relationship she had, like numerous other albums. On that note, when she says things like “twenty-year sleep,” I’m thinking…she has been deceived by boyfriends since she was ten? And, now that’s over?]
So, after a few typical tourist-y photos of Paris and slightly odd backstage clippings, we get to the end of the concert and the part where the performer tells the audience she’s never had this much fun. [UUUUGH! Yes, a grown man just turned into a groaning teenager. I know it’s something performers do, but I thought…I thought she was more…”real”…and that such sentiments could never be genuine. Do you say such things just to be nice? I mean…surely, she gets around and has had similar experiences.]
And, finally, during the end credits, I see the words “worship,” “love” and “false god” appear on the screen. So, I turn up the volume and listen (closer)… Is that what she’s singing? Worship love even if it’s a false god? What does that mean? That bit stuck with me the rest of the night like a bad taste in the mouth. Darn coded messages! [And, I feel so clueless, which really sucks when you pride yourself on being a metaphor man.] What was she trying to say in that song?
Help me out, dear and enduring (because I write so much in this space and am probably testing your peepers) readers. Was it…
A) She is a false god, some evil being posing as a sort of “messiah” and deceiving us all in her sway?
B) She is not the goddess people claim her to be; she wants people to know she’s just a down-to-earth gal so she stays humble and isn’t transformed in some vile way by the forces steering her career?
C) She sees past relationships (loves) as deceptive hopes put on high pedestals and repeats this mantra to herself to acknowledge her mistakes…in a way that isn’t her previous I’m-going-to-lace-my-present-hatred-of-you-after-I-dated-you-in-a-song mentality?
D) She has lost her lofty view of true love and now thinks in a more non-spiritual, earthy way, like so many others I’ve met, those who’ve been stripped of their souls by routine sexual pursuits?
Now then…I got all that out of my system and feel I can get on with my day. It’s probably best I don’t dwell much more on the subject. But, I’ll be “chuffed” if I see some responses to my question. [I used that word correctly; yes?]