camille > camille's Quotes

“If you are honest, people may deceive you. Be honest anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfishness. Be kind anyway. All the good you do today will be forgotten by others tomorrow. Do good anyway.”
― Fredrik Backman, Beartown

“P.S. I hope BOB doesn’t come tonight.”
― Jennifer Lynch, The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer

“I have simply forgotten how to be loved. Laura”
― Jennifer Lynch, The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer

“Life is too short and love is too long.”
― Tamsyn Muir, Nona the Ninth

“Camilla and Palamedes were loved by Nona, said Paul. Pyrrha was loved by Nona. It’s finished, it’s done. You can’t take loved away.”
― Tamsyn Muir, Nona the Ninth

“My necromancer and I always liked you...and hey, what’s like except a love that hasn’t been invited indoors?”
― Tamsyn Muir, Nona the Ninth

“Camilla, we did it right, didn't we?" Palamedes said, and now Nona knew he wasn't speaking to anyone else in the universe. "We had something very nearly perfect... the perfect friendship, the perfect love. I cannot imagine reaching the end of this life and having any regrets, so long as I had been allowed to experience being your adept.”
― Tamsyn Muir, Nona the Ninth

“We were children - playing in the reflections of stars in a pool of water... Thinking it was space.”
― Tamsyn Muir, Nona the Ninth

“This is all there is to love? Simply by being in your life, I have added indelibly to its weight?”
― Tamsyn Muir, Nona the Ninth

“You told me, Sleep, I’ll wake you in the morning.
I asked, What is morning? and you said,
When everyone who fucked with me I’d dead.

When everyone we loved has gone or fled,
That’s morning. Empty’s just another word for clean.
Let’s put this first draft dream of mine to bed.

I the appointed hour
I’ll pull up your sheets. I’ll kill the light,
Lie down beside you; die; and sleep the night.

This time will be the time we get it right;
Forgiveness not so hard, nor anger long;
Our graves will be less deep, our lies less true

You held aloft the sword.
I still love y”
― Tamsyn Muir, Nona the Ninth

“Love and freedom don't coexist.”
― Tamsyn Muir, Nona the Ninth

“Don’t worry, kiddie, she said tiredly. I’ll keep loving you—my problem is I don’t know how to stop.”
― Tamsyn Muir, Nona the Ninth

“I can’t believe nobody’s ever going to laugh at my jokes again. I can’t believe it. It’s all gone, I’m the only one left. It’s just me and you and no more jokes.”

She said, “I still love you.”

And he laughed and said, “That was a good one.” Then he wept again.”
― Tamsyn Muir, Nona the Ninth

“I could never stop you from loving anything. I don't have the right. Nobody has the right to tell you who to love or who not to love, and equally nobody's obliged to love you. If you were forced into loving them, it wouldn't be love...”
― Tamsyn Muir, Nona the Ninth

“Won’t you look at me, Camilla Hect?”
Camilla murmured something that Nona could not hear. The body said, “I died, and you carried me. I gambled, and you covered my bet. You kept the faith, and were the instrument of both my vengeance and my grace. And now I have fought through time, and the River, and Ianthe the First—fought and bested Ianthe the First, and I hope I never fight her ever again…Will you not look at me now, Cam, and know me?”
Camilla raised her chin. She looked at the dead face. She said quietly—“Yes Warden. I will always know you.”
Their foreheads touched. Camilla reached out with her slippery hand, and Palamedes clasped it with Ianthe Naberius’s cold, gloveless one. Because both of their hands were very messy, it made an embarrassing squelch, but neither of them appeared to notice or care. Nona had to look away.
She heard Palamedes say, in the voice of Ianthe Naberius—“Pyrrha, I can barely do anything. I’m only the hand in a sock puppet. I don’t think I could unpick a single ward, and I can’t do a damn thing for Cam’s bleeding—thank God nothing’s protruding.”
Cam said, without opening her eyes, “Don’t worry about me, Warden. I’ll walk it off.”
“Yes, thank you for your input,” said Palamedes pleasantly. “I’ve taken it under advisement and will add it to the next agenda.”
Camilla smiled that wonderful hot-metal smile that Nona loved as long as she had been alive.
“Jackass.”
― Tamsyn Muir, Nona the Ninth

“Camilla, we did it right, didn’t we?” Palamedes said, and now Nona knew he wasn’t speaking to anyone else in the universe. “We had something very nearly perfect…the perfect friendship, the perfect love. I cannot imagine reaching the end of this life and having any regrets, so long as I have been allowed to experience being your adept.”
Camilla Hect stared at him stolidly, and then burst into tears. She made very little noise, but the tears were violent anyway; Palamedes took her hands and said in distress, “Cam—dear one—don’t.”
“No,” Camilla said, after an obvious struggle to master herself. “No. I’m crying because…I’m crying because I’m relieved,” she said, frankly mulishly. “I’m relieved… Warden, I’m so relieved.”
“Not long now,” he promised.
Camilla took a couple of gasping breaths—it was obvious how much they hurt her—and then she said: “Warden—will she know who we are, in the River?”
“Oh, she’s not stupid,” said Palamedes lightly. “In the River—beyond the River—I truly believe we will see ourselves and each other as we really are. And I want them to see us. I am not saying this was our inevitable end… I am saying we have found the best and truest and kindest thing we can do in this moment. Tell me no, and we’ll go on as we have been…and we’ll go on unafraid…but say yes, and we will make this end, and this beginning, together.”
Camilla shivered all over. Then she was at rest; she relaxed her head—the lines of her neck drooped like a flower—she raised it again.
“Palamedes, yes,” she said. “My whole life, yes. Yes, forever, yes. Life is too short and love is too long.”
He demanded: “Tell me how to do it, and I’ll do it.”
Camilla said, “Go loud.”
― Tamsyn Muir, Nona the Ninth

“What an entirely haunted time to be alive.”
― Tamsyn Muir, Nona the Ninth

“Come on, love. Guys as careful as me don’t have accidents.”
― Tamsyn Muir, Nona the Ninth

“Why are you not appeased? That is how meat loves meat.”
― Tamsyn Muir, Nona the Ninth

“God is a dream, Harrow,” he said very gently. “You all dream me together…”
― Tamsyn Muir, Nona the Ninth

“You were screaming. I wanted you to stop, I wanted … I wanted you. I wanted you like a caveman wants a wildfire … or the sun. I thought you were going to take me, somehow. Purge me. Use me as an instrument. But you didn’t say anything … I was babbling, Show me. Come on. I’m ready. You kept screaming and screaming … like a baby in pain. So I tried to hurt you—I did hurt you. I reached out for you, and it hurt you … but I wasn’t strong enough. The caveman. The wildfire. The Neolithic priest staggering in front of the falling star.”
― Tamsyn Muir, Nona the Ninth

“Nothing particularly interesting happened, until Camilla burst into flames.”
― Tamsyn Muir, Nona the Ninth

“As the world went up I remade us both. I hid me in you, I hid you in me. And when we were together, once the shaman had claimed the sun, I became God.

He said: It wasn’t enough.”
― Tamsyn Muir, Nona the Ninth

“. She wondered again why anything that hurt them only hurt briefly, but that anger took such a long time to go away.”
― Tamsyn Muir, Nona the Ninth

“It felt so easy to be good when you were happy.”
― Tamsyn Muir, Nona the Ninth

“Fuck one flesh, one end, Harrow. I already gave my flesh to you, and I already gave you my end. I gave you my sword. I gave you myself. I did it while knowing I’d do it all again, without hesitation, because all I ever wanted you to do was eat me.”
― Tamsyn Muir, Harrow the Ninth

“But Harrowhark—Harrow, who was two hundred dead children; Harrow, who loved something that had not been alive for ten thousand years—Harrowhark Nonagesimus had always so badly wanted to live. She had cost too much to die.”
― Tamsyn Muir, Harrow the Ninth

“It had bewildered her, back at Canaan House, how the whole of her always seemed to come back to Gideon. For one brief and beautiful space of time, she had welcomed it: that microcosm of eternity between forgiveness and the slow, uncomprehending agony of the fall. Gideon rolling up her shirt sleeves. Gideon dappled in shadow, breaking promises. One idiot with a sword and an asymmetrical smile had proved to be Harrow’s end: her apocalypse swifter than the death of the Emperor and the sun with him.”
― Tamsyn Muir, Harrow the Ninth

“There was so much I should have told you. I just didn't have time. I didn't know. I didn't know I'd have to say: A sword doesn't hold an edge on its own, you sack of Ninth House garbage. I didn't know I'd have to say, if you dip a sword into melty bone, the metal gets more pitted than an iron mine, you cross-patched necromantic shit.

I think the main thing I should have said was, You sawed open your skull rather than be beholden to someone. You turned your brain into soup to escape anything less than 100 percent freedom. You put me in a box and buried me rather than give up your own goddamned agenda.

Harrowhark, I gave you my whole life and you didn't even want it.

Actually, scratch that, the main thing I should have said was, SQUATS ARE A START, OR A COUPLE OF STAR JUMPS, THEY'RE NOT DIFFICULT.”
― Tamsyn Muir, Harrow the Ninth

“I KISSED YOU AND LATER I WOULD KISS HIM TOO BEFORE I UNDERSTOOD WHAT YOU WERE, AND ALL THREE OF US LIVED TO REGRET IT—BUT WHEN I AM IN HEAVEN I WILL REMEMBER YOUR MOUTH, AND WHEN YOU ROAST DOWN IN HELL I THINK YOU WILL REMEMBER MINE”
― Tamsyn Muir, Harrow the Ninth