Jordyn > Jordyn's Quotes

“If that rank bastard comes near my baby– (Sunshine's grandmother)
Grandma! (Sunshine)
Well, he is. Messing with my granddaughter. I’ll boil his warts in oil and feed his head to the wolves. (Sunshine's grandmother)
You know, wolves don’t really like to eat heads. Meat, yes, but heads are really hard on the jaws. Not to mention, the cranium gets caught between your teeth. (Vane)”
― Sherrilyn Kenyon, Night Embrace

“If Sasha’s threatened, Astrid’s upset. If Astrid’s upset, I’m going to kill whatever’s upsetting her until she’s happy again. (Zarek)”
― Sherrilyn Kenyon, Dead After Dark

“Greetings, O Great Gazoo. How nice of you to join us here on planet Earth again. (Cael)
Thanks, Barney. How’s Betty and Bam Bam doing? (Acheron)
Great, if I could only get them away from Wilma and Pebbles. Those women are nothing but trouble. (Cael)
Nah, they’re good women. It’s the ones in red who are always the downfall of good men. (Acheron)”
― Sherrilyn Kenyon, Dark Side of the Moon

“Curran looked back at me. "Why is it you always attract creeps?"

"You tell me." Ha! Walked right into that one, yes, he did.”
― Ilona Andrews, Magic Strikes

“The vampire stared at me, his mouth slack as Ghastek assessed his options. I took a couple of forms from my desk, put them into the vamp's mouth, and pulled them up by their edges.
"What are you doing?" Ghastek asked.
"My hole puncher broke."
"You have no respect for the undead.”
― Ilona Andrews, Magic Burns

“Not only will you sleep with me, but you will say 'please.'"
I stared at him, shocked.
The smile widened. "You will say 'please' before and 'thank you' after."
Nervous laughter bubbled up. "You've gone insane. All that peroxide in your hair finally did your brain in, Goldilocks.”
― Ilona Andrews, Magic Burns

“I don't want it to be attributed to a loss of control on my part. When I throw you out of the window, I want there to be no doubt the act was deliberate.”
― Ilona Andrews, Magic Burns

“Here, Kitty, Kitty, Kitty...”
― Ilona Andrews, Magic Bites

“It's a reflex. Hear a bell, get food. See an undead, throw a knife. Same thing, really.”
― Ilona Andrews, Magic Bites

“As he passed me, he leaned to Curran and handed him a paper fan folded from some sort of flyer.

Curran looked at the fan. “What?”
"An emergency precaution, Your Majesty. In case the lady faints.”

Curran just stared at him.

Raphael strode toward the Pit, turned, flexed a bit, and winked at me.

"Give me that,” I told Curran. “I need to fan myself.”
"No, you don’t.”
― Ilona Andrews, Magic Strikes

“Every time I think you’ve reached the limits of arrogance, you show me new heights. Truly, your egotism is like the Universe—ever expanding.”
― Ilona Andrews, Magic Strikes

“I can't give you the white picket fence, and if I did, you'd set it on fire.”
― Ilona Andrews, Magic Bleeds

“He leaned his head to me, his neck so close to my lips, I felt the heat coming off his skin. His breath was warm against my ear. His voice was a ragged snarl. "I miss you."
This wasn't happening.
"I worry about you." He dipped his head and looked into my eyes. "I worry something stupid will happen and I won't be there and you'll be gone. I worry we won't ever get a chance and it's driving me out of my skull."
No, no, no, no.........
We stared at each other. The tiny space between us felt too hot. Muscles bulged on his naked frame. He looked feral.
Mad gold eyes stared into mine. "Do you miss me, Kate?"
I closed my eyes trying to shut him out. I could lie then we would be back to square one. Nothing would be resolved. I'd still be alone, hating him and wanting him.
He grabbed my shoulders and shook me once. "Do you miss me?"
I took the plunge. "Yes.”
― Ilona Andrews, Magic Bleeds

“If you come, you better come in force because I will kill every single one of you. My hand won't shake, my aim won't falter. My face will be the last thing you'll see before you die." I jammed my knife into the table and walked out.”
― Ilona Andrews, Magic Bleeds

“You don't cause problems. You cause catastrophes.”
― Ilona Andrews, Magic Burns

“Kate short-circuits my brain. In my head we always have these clear coherent exchanges, but once we meet, what comes out it is, “Kate, do what I say or I’ll kill you.” Her default reply is, “Fuck you!” and we go downhill from there.”
― Ilona Andrews

“He bared his teeth in a happy feral grin. My own personal psycho.”
― Ilona Andrews, Magic Bleeds

“Your ability to remain alive never ceases to amaze me.”
― Ilona Andrews, Magic Burns

“Yes, I'm too mad to punish you right now. We'll talk about it when we get home. Go brush your teeth, comb your hair, put on dry clothes, and get the guns. We're going to Wal-Mart.”
― Ilona Andrews, On the Edge

“I've never created a riot before. I did cause a brawl at the last formal. A large number of young women there actually arrived with the expectation of seducing me into matrimony, and a couple of their mothers came to blows. It was hilari—I mean, dreadful. Simply dreadful.”
― Ilona Andrews, On the Edge

“I gave him my best cryptic smile. He did not fall down to his feet, kiss my shoes, and promise me the world. I must be getting rusty.”
― Ilona Andrews, Magic Bites

“I'm a substitute mom."
"You're more like a crazy aunt who only gets called when somebody needs bailing out of jail.”
― Ilona Andrews, Magic Burns

“Yes. What is it, guilt, revenge, love, what?”
I swallowed. “I live alone.”
"And your point is?”
"You have the Pack. You’re surrounded by people who would fall over themselves for the pleasure of your company. I have no one. My parents are dead, my entire family is gone. I have no friends. Except Jim, and that’s more of a working relationship than anything else. I have no lover. I can’t even have a pet, because I’m not at the house often enough to keep it from starving. When I come crawling home, bleeding and filthy and exhausted, the house is dark and empty. Nobody keeps the porch light on for me. Nobody hugs me and says, ‘Hey, I’m glad you made it. I’m glad you’re okay. I was worried.’ Nobody cares if I live or die. Nobody makes me coffee, nobody holds me before I go to bed, nobody fixes my medicine when I’m sick. I’m by myself.”
― Ilona Andrews, Magic Burns

“Is that a lion with horns and a pitchfork?"
"Yep."
"Is he carrying the moon on his pitchfork?"
"Nope it's a pie.”
― Ilona Andrews, Magic Bleeds

“Wanna spot me?"
"No thanks. How about I just scream verbal encouragements at you?”
― Ilona Andrews, Magic Burns

“Just wait until he figures out I shut him out of his slut hut.”
― Ilona Andrews, Magic Bleeds

“You thought about dragging me into your bed this morning.”
"I thought about stabbing you and running away screaming. You broke into my house without permission and slobbered all over me. You’re a damn lunatic! And don’t give me that line about smelling my desire; I know it’s bullshit."
"I didn’t need to smell you. I could tell by the dreamy look in your eyes and the way your tongue licked the inside of my mouth.”
― Ilona Andrews, Magic Strikes

“Georgie, stop trying to resurrect the shoes. They were never alive in the first place.”
― Ilona Andrews, On the Edge

“...you expect me to fall on my back with my legs spread."
"Not necessarily. ... You can fall on your hands and knees if you prefer. Or against the wall. Or on the kitchen counter. I suppose I might let you be on top, if you make it worth my while.”
― Ilona Andrews, Magic Strikes

“You're an interesting woman."
"Your interest has been duly noted.”
― Ilona Andrews, Magic Burns