Building trust through early support

People may forget what you said in meetings. They rarely forget who believed in them when it mattered. I remember a situation where a team member had the capability, but not the confidence to express it. In discussions, they stayed quiet unless asked directly. It would have been easy to label it as hesitation. Instead, we chose to give them space, involve them in smaller decisions, and acknowledge their input consistently. In one meeting, they shared an idea that shifted the direction of the discussion. It was not a dramatic moment, but it changed how they saw themselves. From that point, their involvement increased, their confidence strengthened, and their contribution became consistent. What stood out was not just their growth, but the impact of a simple decision to believe before results were fully visible. I have seen this pattern repeatedly. When people feel trusted early, they grow into that trust. When they are only judged after results, many never get the chance to show what they are capable of. Within our organization, we try to create that environment intentionally. We do not wait for complete proof before offering responsibility. We look for potential and support it with the right opportunities. That is where real development begins. Leadership is not only about recognizing performance. It is about identifying potential and giving it the confidence to emerge. “People may forget opportunities, but they remember the person who made them believe they were ready for it.” Are you waiting for proof before you trust someone, or helping them build the confidence to prove it? #Leadership #Empowerment #TeamGrowth #LinkedInNews

It was 8:15 AM when a mom’s phone rang. It was her son, panic in his voice: “Mom, I forgot my assignment at home. It’s due in the first period. Please, can you bring it to school?” She could’ve snapped. → “Why weren’t you more careful?” → “I told you to double-check!” But she didn’t. Ten minutes later, she was at the school gate, assignment in hand. Her son rushed over and everything went well. Her son said, “Thanks for not yelling at me, Mom.” And she just smiled. Because in her mind, she knew this: The moment you help someone through a mess without making them feel small is the moment they start trusting you. That evening, after the panic was over, they sat together and talked about building better habits, packing the bag the night before, making a checklist, owning up to mistakes. She knew the lesson would stick because she stood by him when he needed it. This is the same way senior engineers should handle juniors. You don’t build trust by exploding at the first sign of trouble. You build it by showing up, especially when it’s inconvenient. When a junior messes up, the urge to lecture is real. But support comes first, lessons come after. Because good engineers don’t stay just for the perks. They stay where they feel safe enough to make mistakes and learn. And that’s how you build teams that stick together, at home or at work.

Trust among teams is essential for the delivery of outstanding collaborative care. Here are four ways we support an atmosphere of trust at Northwestern Medicine. 1. Use consistent messaging. When workforce members hear different things from different people, or hear nothing at all from their leaders, they may not know what to believe. Unified messaging from leaders to staff members gives the workforce confidence to trust what they hear. How we do it: Quarterly leadership sessions help disseminate important messages for leaders to reinforce with their teams, and my CEO monthly messages ensure the entire workforce gets the same information about key topics. Our chief nursing officer also sends a monthly message to the nursing staff, which makes up about a quarter of our workforce. 2. Ask for and respond to feedback. Being open to input from everyone across the organization ensures that people feel they have a voice in the work they do; following up on that input helps them trust that they are valued and respected. How we do it: In addition to engagement surveys and focus groups, staff have access to a general feedback form and a form for submitting breakthrough ideas. Input is shared with leaders for follow-up. 3. Reinforce a values-based leadership model. For the workforce to trust that the organization is committed to its foundational values, leaders need to set the example for staff to follow. How we do it: We have four values at Northwestern Medicine: Excellence, Teamwork, Integrity and Putting Patients First. We have robust internal training resources to help our leaders understand what the values look like in practice, and annual evaluations are tied to adherence to the values. 4. Encourage staff to get to know each other. When colleagues get to know each other, they understand each other better – their motivations, their challenges and their goals. Understanding builds trust. How we do it: We have workforce resource groups, special-interest groups, mentorship programs, a workforce volunteer team, optional workforce outings and IGNITE (Inspiring Growth, Networking, Improvement, Togetherness and Engagement) groups that bring together colleagues from across the organization to learn about each other, bond over shared interests, and support personal and professional growth. To encourage conversation, I have also launched an internal video series called One Big Question, in which a workforce member and I get together and ask each other one thought-provoking question about our work at Northwestern Medicine. My hope is that this video series will spark similar discussions among teams across the organization. Trust – between patients and care teams, leaders and staff, and co-workers – is part of what makes Northwestern Medicine better. #NMBetter

I have had these thoughts in my notes for a while, but my work with UNICEF Jamaica has brought them to the forefront of my mind again. "Trust is not something that can be requested or gained through grand gestures; it is built through the ordinary details of care. It develops through the way someone is greeted, whether their concerns are taken seriously, whether information is explained clearly and whether promises of confidentiality are upheld. It is strengthened when young people feel that they can speak honestly without being patronised or punished. These interactions may appear small from an organisational perspective, but they can determine whether someone returns, recommends the service to a friend or decides to avoid healthcare in the future."

Before coaching begins, trust must walk in first. Some time ago, I met a business owner who was referred to me for coaching. He had the hunger to grow, was stuck at a critical stage, and had tried different advisors before — none of whom stuck. I could sense the hesitation when we first spoke. So instead of pitching my process or flashing my success stories, I said this: “Let’s do this for 3 months. No fee. No commitment. Just coaching. If you see value, we’ll talk further. If not, you walk away.” His eyes softened. Because more than a growth plan or a strategy session, what he needed was assurance — that I’m here for him, not just his business. And honestly? That conversation changed everything. He showed up to every session with energy. He opened up. He executed. And eventually, he asked to extend the coaching — this time, as a full-paying client. That experience reminded me: People don’t commit when they’re convinced. They commit when they feel safe. In coaching — just like in leadership — trust comes before transformation. And that trust isn’t built with words. It’s built with intent, presence, and a willingness to serve before selling. If you’re a coach, consultant, or leader trying to create change — ask yourself: Have I created enough emotional safety for the other person to truly lean in? Because without that, even the best frameworks won’t land. But with it? Even a 30-minute conversation can become the starting point of lifelong growth. #VijayOnLeadership #CoachingWithTrust #BusinessCoachingIndia #ProBonoCoaching #LeadershipGrowth #TrustedAdvisor #EmotionalSafety #CoachingCulture

It was 8:10 in the morning when a father’s phone started buzzing. His son’s name flashed on the screen. “Dad, I messed up. I forgot my laptop at home. My project presentation is in first period. My PPT is on it. Can you please bring it to school?” The father could have gone off. “You are always so careless.” “I told you to pack everything last night.” But he did not. He took a breath, grabbed the laptop from the study table, and rushed out. Fifteen minutes later, he was at the school gate, slightly out of breath, laptop in hand. His son ran over, eyes wide with stress. The moment he saw the laptop, his shoulders relaxed. “Thank you, Dad. And thank you for not shouting at me.” The father just smiled. Because in his head, he knew this: The way you respond when someone is already scared is what they remember, not just what you say. That evening, when both of them were calm, they sat together at the dining table. They went over what happened. They talked about packing the bag the night before, keeping the laptop on charge, making a small checklist, taking ownership when mistakes happen. The lesson landed, not because he delivered a long lecture, but because earlier in the day, his son felt supported, not judged. This is exactly how senior engineers should handle juniors. You do not build trust by snapping the moment a deployment fails. You build it by jumping in to help, even when it ruins your schedule. When a junior breaks something, the urge to fire off a rant is strong. Fix together first, talk about what went wrong after. Because good engineers do not stay just for salary or perks. They stay where they feel safe enough to admit,“I forgot something, I messed up, I need help,” and know that someone will show up for them. That is how you build teams that stay together, at home and at work.

You're on the Board of a nonprofit organization. And you’ve just hired a new Executive Director. They’re bringing fresh perspective, steady commitment, and a deep sense of purpose. I’ve seen two versions of what happens next. One ED gets a warm welcome, a few quick meetings, and a plate full of expectations. They’re ready to go, yet unsure what success looks like. Within a few months, the excitement gives way to uncertainty. The other ED walks into the same complexity, but with something different from you as the Board. Clear priorities. Shared context. And a Board that shows up consistently and helps shape the work ahead. Twelve months later, that leader is still learning but also leading. The first one? Already burnt out from the overload of figuring everything out solo. What made the difference? 1. 𝗔 𝗳𝗼𝗰𝘂𝘀 𝗼𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗳𝗶𝗿𝘀𝘁 𝘆𝗲𝗮𝗿 It’s easy to assume your new ED will figure out what matters from a packet of onboarding materials. But narrowing the focus early is one of the most helpful things you can do as a Board. Give clarity into: • What do we need to stabilize or strengthen? • Where can we build momentum? • What would progress look like one year from now?    You’re not making the job smaller. You’re making it doable. 2. 𝗦𝗵𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝘆 𝗯𝗲𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗱 𝗸𝗲𝘆 𝗿𝗲𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀𝗵𝗶𝗽𝘀 New EDs often spend the first year trying to figure out who holds influence, who needs support, and who they’ve accidentally overlooked. You can shorten that runway. So here, go beyond introductions to the new ED. Coach them with context. Share: • Where trust already exists and how it was built • Where expectations have gone unspoken • Where previous tensions may resurface without context • Why funders and supporters are longtime champions, get specific • Who they need to know before the first public meeting Context helps underpin confidence. 3. 𝗢𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿 𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗮𝗱𝘆 𝘀𝘂𝗽𝗽𝗼𝗿𝘁 The goal here is to reinforce clarity, confidence, and trust. And build a partnership effort, not to micromanage. Set a rhythm for support: • Regular check-ins that focus on learning, not evaluation • A clear point of contact on the board Shared expectations about decisions, communication, and pace While transitions are full of unknowns, you NS your full Board can smooth out a lot of those by using this 3-step approach.

Young People, the best time to audition for a job is when there is no opening. And the best time for an entrepreneur to raise money in Nigeria is when he or she is not actively fundraising. Why? Because by the time opportunities formally arrive, many of the real decisions may have already been made. Fundraising does not truly begin in conference rooms or investor presentations. It often starts years earlier, in dormitories, offices, classrooms, and in ordinary interactions where people quietly observe who you are. What you did ten years ago can determine whether your classmate, colleague, or former teammate decides to support you today when they have resources to invest. At Tekedia, I often explain that much of life runs on what I call ITT Capital: Integrity, Trust, and Tenacity. This capital is not built during fundraising rounds. ITT Capital compounds over years through repeated interactions and transactional moments. Think about it: can your classmate confidently give you money? Can your colleague at work support your idea? If people around you have the resources but consistently hesitate, perhaps the issue is not the economy or timing. Perhaps your ITT Capital before them remains weak. Investment itself has two phases: the transactional and the relational. ITT Capital governs the transactional phase. People first watch your behavior, reliability, and consistency. If you perform well there, you unlock the relational phase where trust deepens and opportunities emerge. And from that relationship comes the possibility of long-term support. Within that relationship, however, another important question always emerges: in moments of truth, who comes first: you or the person who trusted you enough to invest? The best founders understand stewardship. They understand that money entrusted to them carries responsibility. Get it from me: people rarely invest because they merely like an idea. They invest because they respect people and believe the builder has a higher chance to grow their money. An investor invests in YOU before investing in your company because the investor has modelled that you are going to handle this fund better than he or she can! It is a sacred economic positioning because you cannot give money to someone you think you can do better than. Forget the pitch deck for a moment. Forget the grand narrative and the product story. The first “company” investors evaluate is YOU. If they do not like the product called YOU, they may never invest. And remember: no career can blossom if people cannot recommend you in your absence. And for that to happen, you must reduce the burden for them to do that by boosting your ITT. Good luck.

We Underestimate How Much Emotional Support We Need to Maintain Behaviors My work focuses primarily on the adoption of new behaviors. I know much less about what it takes to maintain a behavior. This article was extremely helpful in helping me understand what it takes to remain a contraceptive user in Uganda. Many health interventions focus on providing the right facts—hoping knowledge alone will empower people to make better choices. This study from rural Uganda reminds us that emotional support is just as vital in helping women sustain contraceptive use. The qualitative study explored how social networks—partners, relatives, and peers—influence women's decisions around contraception. The findings were both intuitive and surprising. One woman described how her husband’s quiet support—helping with chores and accompanying her to the clinic—gave her the courage to use a method she had been afraid to try. That’s behavior change in action—and it didn’t come from a poster or pamphlet. Interestingly, the study also highlighted a paradox: while peer influence is powerful, many women don’t trust the accuracy of the information they receive from friends or relatives. They prefer to seek advice from trained health workers. Yet, it’s often their informal network that gives them the emotional push to act. How Does this Help Implementers of SRH Programs? It is important to design for both credibility and connection. We should train health workers not just to inform, but to listen. We should equip trusted community members—like Village Health Teams—to be sources of both facts and empathy. And we shouldn’t dismiss emotional support as “soft” or secondary. It is often the glue that holds behavior change together. Maintaining a new behavior requires ongoing emotional scaffolding. One-time counseling sessions aren’t enough. Neither are facts delivered without follow-up. Change is a social process. Sustaining it is emotional work. We don’t just need information to make decisions—we need encouragement, validation, and a sense that someone understands our fears and hopes. We rely on stories shared by peers, reassurance from partners, and the quiet solidarity of a relative who says, “I’ve been there too.” This emotional backing helps us overcome powerful barriers such as the fear of infertility, societal pressure to have children soon after marriage, or disapproval from a partner. As I was lost in this article in the car in the supermarket parking lot, waiting for my wife, Zeinab Masud Agha to return with the groceries, she spoke over my shoulder: “I am your emotional support for maintaining your behaviors.” It’s tough having a spouse who is a psychotherapist: You can never win an argument with them, especially when they are right #BehaviorChange #EmotionalSupport #PublicHealth #FamilyPlanning #SocialNetworks #HealthCommunication #GenderAndHealth #HumanCenteredDesign #contraception

I learned early in my career: a bad first impression can take months to recover from. Here’s what I do to make sure I start strong. In Customer Success, that first interaction with a customer isn’t a warm-up. It’s the moment they decide if you can become a trusted partner or just another vendor. Get it right, and you set the tone for trust, collaboration, and long-term growth. Get it wrong, and you’ll be climbing uphill for the rest of the relationship. Even if you have a standard framework for your customer kickoff call, you can still take control and ensure that YOU are making a strong first impression, not the deck. Your presence, curiosity, and ability to connect will matter far more than any slide. Here’s how I make sure I get it right: 1️⃣ Do your homework Know their business, industry, competitors, and key players before the meeting. Showing up prepared signals respect and commitment. 2️⃣ Lead with curiosity, not a pitch Ask questions first. Understand their goals, challenges, and priorities before talking about your solution. 3️⃣ Be crystal clear on what happens next Outline next steps, timelines, and how success will be measured. Ambiguity kills trust. 4️⃣ Match their energy If they’re casual, meet them there. If they’re formal, adjust. Connection builds faster when you align with their style. 5️⃣ Deliver early value Share a quick win, insight, or resource they can use right away. Prove you’re there to make a difference, not just have a meeting. The first impression isn’t about perfection, it’s about intention. It’s showing up in a way that makes the customer think, “This is someone I want to partner with.” Because when you start strong, you don’t just earn their attention, you earn their trust. And trust is the currency that powers every successful partnership. What’s one thing you do to make a strong first impression with your customers?