Here's my variation on the slightly dull unset method. It throws in a bit of 80's Stallone action spice into the mix. Enjoy!

<?php
/**
 * function rambo (first blood)
 *
 * Completely and utterly destroys everything, returning the kill count of victims
 *
 * @param    It don't matter, it’s Rambo baby
 * @return    Integer    Body count (but any less than 500 and it's not really worth mentioning)
 */
function rambo() {

    // Get the victims and initiate that body count status
    $victims = func_get_args();
    $body_count = 0;    
    
    // Kill those damn punks
    foreach($victims as $victim) {
        if($death_and_suffering = @unset($victim)) {
            $body_count++;
        }
    }
    
    // How many kills did Rambo tally up on this mission?
    return($body_count);
}
?>